Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Destrution of Perfection ❯ Chapter Two ( Chapter 2 )

Destruction Of Perfection Chapter Two

Duo stared at the ceiling that stared right back down at him. The clock by the bed showed the time to be little after three on the morning. Duo was at a loss at what to do. Every since he had got into bed questions had raced through his mind. Questions he had no answers to despite how much he wanted them.

The main Question bobbing through his head happened to be: What was wrong with Quatre? It was the important one, the one that was keeping him up at night with worry. After the war and they'd returned to normal life the change that had come over the blond was quite startling. He'd taken to avoiding the others burying himself his work. He had lost a lot of weight. His eyes once so full of life were empty and hollow, showing the true void that was his soul. He wasn't the kind, innocent person he had been. He was vacant. Almost as if part of him had disappeared, the essence of everything Quatre. He had even stopped playing his music with Trowa and Duo knew everyone missed the wonderful music he could play. Everyone blamed it on the trauma of the war. It had been hard on everyone but on the gentle soul, kind soul that was Quatre maybe it was enough to be the cause.

Another question that followed was: Should he tell Quatre his true feelings? He loved Quatre more than anything in the world and had done since ha had met the beautiful pilot. He adored Quatre and would of gladly doted on him if given the chance. But then again what gave a lowly war orphan the right to love a beautiful, rich powerful angel. What would Quatre see in someone like him with his course humour and rough ways? Quatre was perfectly elegant and refined. He deserved someone who matched his status.

But it was hard, very hard to see the man you loved wither away in front of your own eyes. To see someone who was always so content and happy failing to pieces. How did you watch the one you love give into the darkness that surrounded his soul, taking him away from the world only leaving behind a shell of his former self.

If there was one thing overall that terrified Duo it was losing all trace of Quatre for good. He was petrified of seeing Quatre because every time he did he could see that he had lost a little bit more of the man he loved. He'd woken up from nightmares, unsure if they were real or not of Quarter no longer being around and as much as he hated to admit it, he looked in the newspapers and watched the news for articles about the death of rich businessmen knowing one day, most likely sooner than later, he'd find one about Quatre if things continued this way.

He wanted to make Quarter fell better, to wrap his arms around Quatre's small form. He would of moved heaven and earth if he could have to remove Quatre's pain but it appeared that no matter what anyone did it did not help Quatre.

With a yawn, Duo finally succumbed to exhaustion clouding the edges of his mind.

***

Duo woke up the following morning. He didn't know all the answers to his questions but he knew he had to tell Quatre his feelings and was determined to do it at the next available opportunity. This thought led him to pulling the bed quilt over his head scared about what it could lead to.

What if Quatre rejected him? What if Quatre was disgusted? What if Quatre never spoke to him again? Could he live happily knowing he had destroyed everything he had ever had with Quatre.

Duo groaned but found his thoughts changing as his optimistic side kicked in.

If he told Quatre he'd find out for sure if there was a chance for Quatre and himself and it would stop himself always wondering what could have been. He might be able to get Quatre to open up to him about his worries. And anyway, maybe all Quatre needs is a bit of love and comfort.

While his resolve was still fresh he sat up and picked up the phone and dialled Quatre's number

"Hello" Quatre answered on the third ring

"Hey it's me"

"Oh hi Duo … um … can I phone you back this isn't a good time"

"Oh right … " Duo was at a loss at what to say, "I was just seeing if you wanted to come round tonight. Get a video and Pizza we haven't seen each other for a while"

"I'm really busy with work at the moment but" he continued as if picking up on Duo's disappointment "I can make it Friday at about seven"

"Cool I'll see you then"

Goodbye Duo"

"Bye"

He slumped back into the pillows and groaned. It looked like the self-proclaimed god of death had a date with a lady called fate.

****

The next two days passed by reasonable quickly as the days do when something dreaded looms. Not that anything dreaded was going to happen as all of Duo's niggling doubts had mounted up until Duo was to scared to tell Quatre. Too much would have to be risked, a risk that Duo didn't want to make. He couldn't chance his friendship with Quatre, it was much better to be just friends than not have Quatre at all.

Yeah he admitted he was a wuss.

Duo cast a quick glance around the living room as the doorbell rang. He went to the front door and opened it to find Quatre.

"Hi How have you been?" he asked as he greeted his friend

"I've been swamped with work but everything else has been fine"

They entered the living room as they spoke

"Well" Duo said "the pizza should arrive anytime now" The doorbell rang in the hall "and it looks like it's here. Go sit while I get Pizza"

Dou quickly went back to the door and exchanged the pizza for money. He moved back into the living room but stopped at the door as the beauty that was Quatre struck him. Everything about Quatre was perfect and Duo really couldn't see anything that needed to be improved. It was like seeing a classic piece of art for the first time; awe struck at the magnificence of it, unable to believe something like that could be created.

But there was something in Quatre's eyes that made you realise the cheerful exterior was nothing more than a mask. They were once filled with innocent happiness now appeared haunted and filled with despair. Duo had often heard the phrase that the eyes are the window to the soul and if that was true then Quatre's soul was in hell.

"What?" Quatre asked as he caught Duo watching him

"Are you ok?" Duo had to ask. He sighed, he wanted to know what was hurting Quatre so much.

"Everything's fine why do you ask" Duo failed to notice how Quatre avoided his gaze.

"You just seem sad" understatement of the year the voice in his head added.

"I'm just tired. Are you going to let me have some of that pizza before it goes cold?" Quatre said to change the subject

"Oh yeah … here" he placed the box on the table on front of the sofa.

"Thanks"

The evening passed swiftly but Duo noticed every time Quatre laughed that it wasn't as merry as it used to be and his eyes didn't hold the sparkle he associated with them. It seemed as if Quatre's spark had frizzled out

"Quatre are you still ticklish." He asked

"Don't," Quatre said as he shock his head "I wont speak to you"

Duo lunged at Quatre pinning the blonde to the sofa

"You know something Quatre I think you are"

Quatre creased up with laughter as Duo began to tickle his sides

"No Duo please stop!" Quatre managed to shout out over his laughs

Duo did so and looked down at Quatre watching as he smiled his first real smile in a while.

"Ah there's the Quatre I know"

Quatre shot him an adorable quizzical look and before he could stop himself Duo had leaned down and claimed Quatre's lips with his own in a soft, gentle kiss. Duo pulled back and moved to get off Quatre

"I'm so sorry Quatre I did-"

Before he could finish, speaking Quatre had grabbed his arm and pulled him down so that their lips met again this time more heated and passionate. They only broke apart when the need for oxygen became too much.

"Quatre I have to tell you the truth. I love you. I'm sorry if you don't feel the same but I had to tell-"

"Shh" Quatre interrupted placing a finger on Duo's lips "I love you too. You can't possible imagine how long I've hoped you would say that"

"Oh I can imagine". He kissed the finger on his lips gently, moving slowly down the palm and on to he pale arm, " I've loved you since I meet you. How could I not fall for you? You're so perfect and beautiful and talented and amazing. I can't even tell you how much I love you" He went to claim Quatre's lips again with his own and Quatre sighed into the kiss "Can I show you what you mean to me? Can I show you how much I love you?"

"Are you sure it's what you want?" Quatre questioned

"Positive as long as it's what you want too. I've wanted you for so long Quatre"

"Well it's what I want too."

They got up and moved to the bedroom, Duo leading Quatre by the hand. Once inside the room Duo asked, "Are you sure about this?" once again. Quatre nodded and replied with

"I've wanted to be with you for so long. I'm sure its what I want"

"Good"

Duo's lips found themselves glued to soft skin of Quatre's neck drawing out the most wonderful moan from his soon to be lover as he hands worked at undoing the buttons on Quatre's shirt. His lips followed his hands as he placed feather light kisses along Quatre's pale collarbone and down the freshly exposed chest. He quickly removed Quatre's trousers leaving him in only a pair of black briefs as he also removed his own clothing before both of them settled on the bed.

That night was gentle and passionate and pure bliss. Every move Duo made was enough to have Quatre begging for more. When they were both ready and their bodies finally joined together as one it was incredible. No words exist to describe how Duo felt when he climaxed releasing his seed deep into Quatre just as Quatre released his. It was mind blowingly good as they had lay in post coital bliss in each others arms not needing any words as they slipped into sleep both more happy nad content than they had felt in a very long time.

***

Duo woke the following morning to find a fully dressed Quatre standing over him.

"Are you going?" he asked

"I have to I've got work" Something wasn't right with Quatre's face but he was still partially asleep and didn't pay to much attention to it

"Oh"

"But I'll be in touch" he bent down and kissed Duo "Remember, whatever happens, for what its worth, I do love you" with that Quatre turned and left the room.

Duo only finding these words slightly odd snuggled back into the bed quilt. There wasn't much point getting up. He had no work to go too. He couldn't believe the last 24 hours. If someone previously had told him that He would get together with Quatre he wouldn't of believed them, he would have laughed in there face. Everything was perfect. OK so maybe Quatre wasn't here now, he had to go to work but last night sure had been incredible. He soon fell asleep again

He woke with a start and glanced at the clock. It showed the time to be four in the afternoon. It was then he realised what was wrong with the expression on Quatre's face. He hadn't smiled. He hadn't even bothered with a fake one. He had looked utterly miserable. It had been as if he'd given up on everything. And what had Quatre had meant by `Whatever happens'. It was all a little to strange.

He cursed himself for not being more observant when he had woke up this morning. He got dressed and went to phone, picked it up and went to dial Quatre's number. Before he had a chance to the doorbell rang. He answered to find Quatre's personal assistant.

"Mr Winner asked me to bring this around immediately"

He handed Duo an envelope and left. Duo closed the door again and opened the envelope and read the enclosed letter

My Dearest Duo,

I have to apologise and beg for your forgiveness for what I have done. I should never of spent the night with you because I don't deserve you or your love. I am so filthy and tainted that I deserve nothing from you.

I know that if you know the truth you would feel the disgusted at yourself for coming near me. You called me beautiful and perfect but that's not true. He destroyed all that a year ago. He destroyed everything, my soul, heart and left me with this filthy body.

I love you Duo with every fibre of my being. When you held me I could almost forget how polluted he had made me. I could almost believe your words when you called me beautiful. I'm not. I could almost forget the events that had haunted my nightmares for the last years but I can't pretend nothing happened anymore. It's been killing me ever since knowing that I allowed him to do it.

I'm his whore Duo ever since the night he forced himself upon me. The night he destroyed me and condemned me to live in this hell. I had spent so long dreaming of us being together, settling down, having children and living happily ever after but I understand that can never happen now.

I gave you all I had to offer last night. I gave you my body. I greatly desired to give you my heart and soul but my heart was crushed and my soul now resides in Hell.

I'm so sorry Duo more than you could ever imagine but I am his whore until the day that I die and I'm a worthless, most definitely not worthy of you,

I know you will find someone worthy of your love

Quatre

P.S I have enclosed an account of what happened a year ago. Please don't hate me for it.

By the end Duo was confused. He had no idea what to think. First Quatre's behaviour this morning now all this. What did he mean by `his whore now'. He opened the other piece of paper and read

It's been year to the day since you, betrayed me, hurt me, abused me, raped me. Do you even know it was a year ago today you destroyed me

Duo read on unable to stop himself. He read the last line and raced to the bathroom to empty the contents of his stomach into the toilet.

His poor beautiful Quatre. How could that bastard have done that to him? How could someone do that to person so innocent and naïve? Duo found that he was shacking as tears slid from his eyes.

No wonder Quatre wasn't his normal. self. He'd been- he'd been raped by Heero Yuy. Duo felt a rage rush upon him like none he had ever felt before. That bastard, that sick twisted bastard. How could someone do that to a friend? How could show his face after what he had done? God how Quatre had felt being confronted by that.

The last line echoed through his head. `You destroyed my life but I will be the one to take it. See you in hell'.

"Shit" Duo cursed as he rushed out of the door" "Please don't have done anything stupid Quatre"

As he was running towards Quatre's office, he pulled out his phone and called Quatre's office

"Hello-" the secretary began but Duo cut across her. No time for pleasantries

"I need to speak to Quatre"

"I'm afraid Mister Winner has gone home for the day. He looked rather pale. I think he might be catching something. He didn't look good"

"Shit thanks"

He changed direction and headed fro Quatre's house thankful that it was closer than the office.

`Please let him be ok' Duo chanted as an internal Manta, praying to any god who was listening that he wasn't too late to save the man he loved as he ran like a manic through the streets of the colony. . He ran up to the front door and banged on it until an annoyed looking Rasid answered.

"Hello"

"Where's Quatre!?!" he demanded as Rashid looked at him taking in the tear stained face "Where is he?"

"Master Quatre is resting and has asked not to be disturbed until morning"

Duo pushed past Rashid and headed to Quatre's room.

"Wait! He doesn't want to see anyone" Rashid called after him only to be ignored

Duo reached Quatre's room to find it locked.

"Quatre! Open the door!!"

When he received no answer, he broke the door down and found the room in darkness. He quickly glanced over the room and saw Quatre on the bed. On the bedside cabinet appeared to be a couple of empty pill bottles.

"Quatre!!" Duo raced to the bed and turned Quatre over to find him n the verge of losing conscious

"I'm sorry I wish you didn't have to see me looking like this I must look pathetic"

"What have you taken Quatre?"

"The pain will end soon Duo. Don't worry soon I'll be free." Duo reached for Quatre's hand

"No Quatre I need you to stay with me. I love you please don't do this to me." Duo's eyes filled with tears again that fell freely down his checks

"Don't cry for me Duo I don't deserve it but you don't understand Duo-"

"No you're the one who doesn't understand. I love you Quatre. You can't leave now me that I've finally worked up the courage to tell you"

"It's too late Duo I can't be with you. I belong to him"

"You don't Quatre but I do belong to you. You have my heart and soul in your hand. I can't go on without you."

"I'm sorry but you'll realise that this is for the best. I love you Duo but I've already given you all I can give. I'm nothing but a filthy whore"

Quatre's eyes fluttered closed and his breathing slowed to a stop as the life slowly left his body leaving Duo clutching at the corpse of his dead lover as he buried his head in Quatre's chest and cried.

The End

A/N This is dedicated to all my wonderful reviewers. This wouldn't have been written if it weren't for your inspiration. Thank you so much for your encouragement.

I'm sorry that this has taken so long to write (hey its only 6 months) but I struggled a lot with it but I finally wrote it. I was up until two in the morning doing it and was exhausted at school the following day.

I hope this answered any questions that anyone had. I did attempt to do that.