Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Fighting the Darkness ❯ Chapter 14
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: deathangel125 
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Horror / Psychological / Supernatural / Thriller / Angst | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 06.30.2012 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.1K | Visits: 294 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Horror / Psychological / Supernatural / Thriller / Angst | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 06.30.2012 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.1K | Visits: 294 | Status: Work In Progress
Disclaimer: The G-boys and Gundam Wing don’t belong to me.
Warnings: Located in the first part. Be sure to look or you might be surprised.
FIGHTING THE DARKNESS – PART 14
He didn’t rush into the hospital once he arrived, not wanting to attract attention. Seeing a guard at the security desk he nodded in acknowledgment as he always did, making sure his weapons were hidden, as well as the blood on his shirt.
The trip to the locked ward went smoothly and he impatiently waited for a nurse to come to the door after pressing the buzzer. When Ellen came to the door to let him in, he felt like giving the older woman a hug, “I’m glad to see you,” he told her sincerely.
She raised her eyebrows at him, obviously surprised at the sentiment. “You’re a mess, Trowa. What have you been doing?”
Thinking of her reaction to his recent activities, he forced a smile, “Hanging out with the wrong kind of people. How’s Duo?” He made sure the door locked before following her down the hallway.
“There have been some signs he’s trying to wake – increased brain activity – but no change other than that. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he’s missed you.”
Hoping she was right but doubting it, he went to Duo’s room while she returned to the desk, pausing as his eyes fell on the unconscious man again, heart beating painfully against his ribs. Standing at the side of the bed, he wasn’t willing to touch Duo, not with the memory of Skunk fresh in his mind, the man’s blood still staining his hands and clothes. He didn’t deny himself the comfort of rubbing his cheek across the top of Duo’s head, smiling a bit when the long hair got caught on the short stubble adorning his face. “God, I missed you,” he whispered.
At his words, Howard roused from sleep, blinking his eyes before staring at Trowa. “You look like hell, boy. Your blood?”
“No. I need to shower. You stay until I get done and I’ll fill you in?”
“You bet. I grabbed a few sandwiches from vending when you didn’t make it for dinner.”
“Was anyone with Duo while you were gone?”
“Ellen stayed with him. She said you called and said he might be in danger.”
“I’ll tell you about it as soon as I get clean,” his stomach clenched painfully at the reminder he hadn’t eaten before the leaving the hospital the day before.
After taking a moment to rub his chin over Duo’s hair, taking strength from the other man, he took some clean clothes from the small closet and headed for the bathroom, needing to scrub the grime from his body. “Did you kill him?”
Howard’s question had him pausing, shaking his head after a moment. “Death would have been merciful. He might still die, but if he lives he’ll think of me every day.”
Weapons in a pile on the tiled floor, Trowa threw his clothes in a heap, intending to burn them at the first available opportunity. Turning the water as hot as he could stand it, he let it run down his body, hoping it would take away some of the stench that seemed to have seeped into his pores. The need to be clean, to feel unsoiled, was overwhelming, and he scrubbed at his skin until it was pink. His hair received the same treatment, nails digging into his scalp so hard he was afraid he was going to scratch furrows.
Once out of the shower, he shaved, aware his stubble would scratch Duo’s soft skin. He didn’t even consider keeping his distance any longer, aware the other man would leave him as soon as he was well. Trowa’s foray into the evil of night had made him determined to be as close to Duo as he could until Duo woke, then he would back off and fade into the background, where he was most comfortable.
Pulling on his clothes he discovered he was trembling, possibly from knowing Duo was still safe, but most likely it was the numbness wearing off. He couldn’t regret embracing that detachment – it had gotten results – but he was beginning to remember how satisfying it had been to watch Skunk’s blood trailing down the man’s skin, how he had reveled in the sound of Skunk’s cries as he had cut flesh from the man’s body.
Feet still bare, he stored his weapons and shoved his jacket into the closet before climbing on the bed beside Duo, pulling the lax body close, sighing as Duo’s warmth and clean scent soaked into him. As his trembling began to ease, he glanced at Howard. “If you have a problem with this, I’m sorry. Right now, I need…”
“You need Duo,” the older man finished, understanding. “I don’t think it has anything to do with the timing. You probably just need him more at this moment than he does you.” Giving a large stretch, Howard stood and set two wrapped sandwiches on the bed beside Duo’s legs, along with a bag of chips and a bottle of water. “Didn’t know what you liked, so I went with turkey and cheese.”
Howard unwrapped one of the sandwiches, so Trowa kept one arm around Duo, groaning when he took his first bite. It wasn’t what he preferred – he didn’t like eating meat unless there was no other alternative - but to him it tasted better than anything he had eaten in a long time. “I’m not picky about food, Howard. As a kid, I learned to eat what I could when it was available.”
“Parents?”
“Didn̵ 7;t know them. I was with a group of mercs for a long time. I didn’t even have a name until I took the original Barton’s.” Finishing off the first sandwich, he was given the water. He barely set the bottle down before the second sandwich, already opened, was held in front of him. Trowa couldn’t stop the smile, “You know I don’t need a father at this late point in my life, right?”
“As if I’d want your scrawny ass anyway. I wouldn’t know what to do with a kid.” The comment had Trowa’s eyes going to Duo then back to Howard, quirking an eyebrow. “Duo don’t count. He’s not like anybody else.”
Eating the second sandwich slower than the first, Trowa watched as the older man blushed. “He sees you as a father.”
Blushing worse than before, Howard cleared his throat in embarrassment. Taking a seat, he waved his hand in the air, “Enough small talk. You found who you were looking for?”
“A man called Skunk.”
“Skunk? Tell me you’re joking.”
“Huge man with a single stripe of bleached blonde hair.” Trowa tilted his head, “I don’t have that much imagination, Howard.”
“So you found him but didn’t kill him. That was quite a bit of blood, my boy.”
“I didn’t kill him. His chances of getting out alive are slim, but he does have a chance.” Trowa used this as a way to soothe his conscience. It would have been easier to kill Skunk outright, but he wasn’t willing to have the man’s death following him around, lurking in his mind.
“What did he tell you? Anything important?”
Recapping the things Skunk had said in a fit of rage, Trowa let himself relax against the support rail, Duo’s shoulder jamming into his chest, strangely comfortable. His fingers ran through the choppy bangs absently, his other hand gripping Duo’s as if his life depended on it. He finally finished with a frown, “I’m having a hard time believing this guy is security. I’ve seen them all while I’ve been here, and I can’t remember any that look like what Duo remembers.”
Howard snickered, holding up a hand, “Sorry. That just sounds fuckin’ weird, but go on.”
“That’s it. Skunk said this guy was planning to take Duo out of the hospital and no one would suspect a security guard. What if he was lying?”
“Do you think he was?”
Recalling every detail, as much as he didn’t want to, Trowa eventually shook his head with a sigh. “He wasn’t even aware of what he was saying. It wasn’t a lie.”
Standing, Howard patted Trowa’s hand where it covered Duo’s. “Get some sleep. Maybe an answer will come to you. I’m gonna go down to the cafeteria for a while and get a good, strong cup of coffee. I’ll keep watch outside the door here.”
“You don’t need to do that, Howard.”
“No offense, Superman, but you can’t do everything without a side-kick. Since your other one can only talk to you when you’re asleep, I’ll fill in for a bit. Someone could knock you over with a feather, Trowa. Get what sleep you can.”
Trowa had every intention of arguing with the older man but the opportunity was lost as the door closed behind Howard, who dimmed the lights as he walked out. He wanted to work everything out in his mind, needed to put the little details in place he had learned and come up with a way to identify Sharp.
Running for almost two full days with no sleep snuck up on him, combining with the constant level of awareness and stress during that time. He was asleep in seconds without being aware of the transition.
“So I’m your side-kick now, huh?” he asked as soon as he felt the familiar warmth that signaled Trowa’s presence. “I don’t have to wear tights and a cape, do I?”
“Duo?” the poor man sounded completely confused.
“Who else? I hope no one else is wandering around in my head. That’s just creepy.”
“I swear I was awake two seconds ago.”
It was possible and he tried to explain. “Might’ve been. I was kinda waiting for you. I might’ve pulled you in as soon as you were asleep. Maybe I should’ve waited longer.”
“No! No, it’s fine. I was just surprised, I guess. Pulled me in?”
This was one of the subjects he had given a lot of thought. “Best I can figure, I sent out some sort of psychic SOS that night, and you caught it. I thought if I tried to call you earlier in the night we’d have more time to…talk. How do you feel when you wake up? Tired?”
“I did at first, when I was seeing into your dreams but not with you. Now that I’m here, and we can talk, I’m not tired at all. I’m energized, revived, as if I had a full night sleep even if it was only a few hours.” The surprise in Trowa’s voice told him this hadn’t been considered before. “Do you know why?”
“This is gonna sound freaky as all hell, but I think you’re sharing my energy. Using some to fill your tanks.” Instantly he could feel the other man withdraw. “Don’t leave, Trowa,” he pled.
“I won’t take energy from you, Duo. You need to save your strength to come back.”
“You’re only taking energy I’m not using, damnit. Don’t leave me.”
“I will not be some sort of…of psychic vampire. I can’t do that to you.”
Hoping to make his point more clear, he explained, “You aren’t doing anything that can hurt me. I never feel drained or anything. You’re using the extra energy my body would be using if I was moving around. I’ve always had a surplus, right? I was told once I have enough energy to supply half of L2 if they could tap into it. You just found a way.”
Trowa fell silent but the warmth reassured him he wasn’t alone. Nevertheless, he breathed a sigh of relief when the other man spoke, sounding pleased. “It’s very quiet here.”
“When I realized what you were planning to do, I decided it was time to face down my demons. Almost everyone here has been put to rest.”
“What made you want to do it? Why so sudden?”
“You were…heading into dangerous things. You don’t understand people like the men you were looking for, Trowa. They’ll hurt you, and enjoy it,” like they enjoyed hurting me. They loved watching my humiliation, danced in glee as I screamed.
“I understand people like those, Duo, more than you think. The place where I grew up was…a lot like this one. That doesn’t matter now. I found one of them. Weren’t you listening to me and Howard earlier?”
He had been so relieved to hear Trowa’s familiar voice he hadn’t paid attention to the words. He had been so happy to know the other man was safe he had let the actual words float in his dark cell without listening. “I was busy, I guess,” he said absently. “You actually found one of them?”
“Skunk. He had…”
“A stripe of white hair. I remember.” Dark eyes over him, chortling with delight as he had begged for them to stop, holding his legs so the others could…
“Duo, stop damnit! Please, God, stop,” the anguish was so easy to hear it replaced all the bad memories with an image of Trowa, staring into the starry sky from aboard Peacemillion.
“What? Stop what?”
If it had been anyone other than Trowa, he would have thought the sound he heard was a sob. “I see what you see in your mind when we’re like this. I can’t bear to see that. I’m sorry, but I just can’t.”
“You see what I see? Everything? Can you hear what I’m thinking?” he asked, on the verge of panic.
“Only that first night, when you hurt yourself.”
“Don’t soft-peddle it, Trowa. I cut my arms open hoping to bleed to death. You heard me then?”
“Yes, but I wasn’t in your mind. It was like I was in the room watching you, but I could hear you in my head. I was trying to yell at you, get you to stop. I kept telling you to call me.” Trowa paused, his voice strained, “When we speak like this, I can see images from your mind. It’s how I knew who to look for. I don’t want you to relive that night, not even in your head.”
The hurt quality of Trowa’s voice made him wonder what the other man was thinking, but he didn’t ask. “Are you giving up on me, then?”
“Never. You can beat this.”
“Not without help. Your help, Trowa. All the voices are gone now, except for one, and I can’t fight it in here. Learning who the other man was will make the voice go away, but there will still be one left. Can you hear it?”
On cue, the man he had heard only one night hissed in his ear, “Such a pretty little dove. I think I’ll have to take something to remember you by, pretty dove.”
“I need to know who he is, Trowa. I can’t fight him in here until I know.”
“I’ll keep looking, I swear. I won’t stop until I find him.” There was a plea there, but he ignored it, already knowing what he had to do, planning to use the newfound ability Trowa had told him about in a way he didn’t want to use it.
“I have to remember. A voice without a face is no help. You have to see his face.”
“Please don’t ask me to do this, Duo. I’ll do anything, but not this.”
“I’m sorry, but this is the way it has to be.” Without words of encouragement or any warning, he made himself remember the worst night of his entire life.
Warnings: Located in the first part. Be sure to look or you might be surprised.
FIGHTING THE DARKNESS – PART 14
He didn’t rush into the hospital once he arrived, not wanting to attract attention. Seeing a guard at the security desk he nodded in acknowledgment as he always did, making sure his weapons were hidden, as well as the blood on his shirt.
The trip to the locked ward went smoothly and he impatiently waited for a nurse to come to the door after pressing the buzzer. When Ellen came to the door to let him in, he felt like giving the older woman a hug, “I’m glad to see you,” he told her sincerely.
She raised her eyebrows at him, obviously surprised at the sentiment. “You’re a mess, Trowa. What have you been doing?”
Thinking of her reaction to his recent activities, he forced a smile, “Hanging out with the wrong kind of people. How’s Duo?” He made sure the door locked before following her down the hallway.
“There have been some signs he’s trying to wake – increased brain activity – but no change other than that. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he’s missed you.”
Hoping she was right but doubting it, he went to Duo’s room while she returned to the desk, pausing as his eyes fell on the unconscious man again, heart beating painfully against his ribs. Standing at the side of the bed, he wasn’t willing to touch Duo, not with the memory of Skunk fresh in his mind, the man’s blood still staining his hands and clothes. He didn’t deny himself the comfort of rubbing his cheek across the top of Duo’s head, smiling a bit when the long hair got caught on the short stubble adorning his face. “God, I missed you,” he whispered.
At his words, Howard roused from sleep, blinking his eyes before staring at Trowa. “You look like hell, boy. Your blood?”
“No. I need to shower. You stay until I get done and I’ll fill you in?”
“You bet. I grabbed a few sandwiches from vending when you didn’t make it for dinner.”
“Was anyone with Duo while you were gone?”
“Ellen stayed with him. She said you called and said he might be in danger.”
“I’ll tell you about it as soon as I get clean,” his stomach clenched painfully at the reminder he hadn’t eaten before the leaving the hospital the day before.
After taking a moment to rub his chin over Duo’s hair, taking strength from the other man, he took some clean clothes from the small closet and headed for the bathroom, needing to scrub the grime from his body. “Did you kill him?”
Howard’s question had him pausing, shaking his head after a moment. “Death would have been merciful. He might still die, but if he lives he’ll think of me every day.”
Weapons in a pile on the tiled floor, Trowa threw his clothes in a heap, intending to burn them at the first available opportunity. Turning the water as hot as he could stand it, he let it run down his body, hoping it would take away some of the stench that seemed to have seeped into his pores. The need to be clean, to feel unsoiled, was overwhelming, and he scrubbed at his skin until it was pink. His hair received the same treatment, nails digging into his scalp so hard he was afraid he was going to scratch furrows.
Once out of the shower, he shaved, aware his stubble would scratch Duo’s soft skin. He didn’t even consider keeping his distance any longer, aware the other man would leave him as soon as he was well. Trowa’s foray into the evil of night had made him determined to be as close to Duo as he could until Duo woke, then he would back off and fade into the background, where he was most comfortable.
Pulling on his clothes he discovered he was trembling, possibly from knowing Duo was still safe, but most likely it was the numbness wearing off. He couldn’t regret embracing that detachment – it had gotten results – but he was beginning to remember how satisfying it had been to watch Skunk’s blood trailing down the man’s skin, how he had reveled in the sound of Skunk’s cries as he had cut flesh from the man’s body.
Feet still bare, he stored his weapons and shoved his jacket into the closet before climbing on the bed beside Duo, pulling the lax body close, sighing as Duo’s warmth and clean scent soaked into him. As his trembling began to ease, he glanced at Howard. “If you have a problem with this, I’m sorry. Right now, I need…”
“You need Duo,” the older man finished, understanding. “I don’t think it has anything to do with the timing. You probably just need him more at this moment than he does you.” Giving a large stretch, Howard stood and set two wrapped sandwiches on the bed beside Duo’s legs, along with a bag of chips and a bottle of water. “Didn’t know what you liked, so I went with turkey and cheese.”
Howard unwrapped one of the sandwiches, so Trowa kept one arm around Duo, groaning when he took his first bite. It wasn’t what he preferred – he didn’t like eating meat unless there was no other alternative - but to him it tasted better than anything he had eaten in a long time. “I’m not picky about food, Howard. As a kid, I learned to eat what I could when it was available.”
“Parents?”
“Didn̵ 7;t know them. I was with a group of mercs for a long time. I didn’t even have a name until I took the original Barton’s.” Finishing off the first sandwich, he was given the water. He barely set the bottle down before the second sandwich, already opened, was held in front of him. Trowa couldn’t stop the smile, “You know I don’t need a father at this late point in my life, right?”
“As if I’d want your scrawny ass anyway. I wouldn’t know what to do with a kid.” The comment had Trowa’s eyes going to Duo then back to Howard, quirking an eyebrow. “Duo don’t count. He’s not like anybody else.”
Eating the second sandwich slower than the first, Trowa watched as the older man blushed. “He sees you as a father.”
Blushing worse than before, Howard cleared his throat in embarrassment. Taking a seat, he waved his hand in the air, “Enough small talk. You found who you were looking for?”
“A man called Skunk.”
“Skunk? Tell me you’re joking.”
“Huge man with a single stripe of bleached blonde hair.” Trowa tilted his head, “I don’t have that much imagination, Howard.”
“So you found him but didn’t kill him. That was quite a bit of blood, my boy.”
“I didn’t kill him. His chances of getting out alive are slim, but he does have a chance.” Trowa used this as a way to soothe his conscience. It would have been easier to kill Skunk outright, but he wasn’t willing to have the man’s death following him around, lurking in his mind.
“What did he tell you? Anything important?”
Recapping the things Skunk had said in a fit of rage, Trowa let himself relax against the support rail, Duo’s shoulder jamming into his chest, strangely comfortable. His fingers ran through the choppy bangs absently, his other hand gripping Duo’s as if his life depended on it. He finally finished with a frown, “I’m having a hard time believing this guy is security. I’ve seen them all while I’ve been here, and I can’t remember any that look like what Duo remembers.”
Howard snickered, holding up a hand, “Sorry. That just sounds fuckin’ weird, but go on.”
“That’s it. Skunk said this guy was planning to take Duo out of the hospital and no one would suspect a security guard. What if he was lying?”
“Do you think he was?”
Recalling every detail, as much as he didn’t want to, Trowa eventually shook his head with a sigh. “He wasn’t even aware of what he was saying. It wasn’t a lie.”
Standing, Howard patted Trowa’s hand where it covered Duo’s. “Get some sleep. Maybe an answer will come to you. I’m gonna go down to the cafeteria for a while and get a good, strong cup of coffee. I’ll keep watch outside the door here.”
“You don’t need to do that, Howard.”
“No offense, Superman, but you can’t do everything without a side-kick. Since your other one can only talk to you when you’re asleep, I’ll fill in for a bit. Someone could knock you over with a feather, Trowa. Get what sleep you can.”
Trowa had every intention of arguing with the older man but the opportunity was lost as the door closed behind Howard, who dimmed the lights as he walked out. He wanted to work everything out in his mind, needed to put the little details in place he had learned and come up with a way to identify Sharp.
Running for almost two full days with no sleep snuck up on him, combining with the constant level of awareness and stress during that time. He was asleep in seconds without being aware of the transition.
“So I’m your side-kick now, huh?” he asked as soon as he felt the familiar warmth that signaled Trowa’s presence. “I don’t have to wear tights and a cape, do I?”
“Duo?” the poor man sounded completely confused.
“Who else? I hope no one else is wandering around in my head. That’s just creepy.”
“I swear I was awake two seconds ago.”
It was possible and he tried to explain. “Might’ve been. I was kinda waiting for you. I might’ve pulled you in as soon as you were asleep. Maybe I should’ve waited longer.”
“No! No, it’s fine. I was just surprised, I guess. Pulled me in?”
This was one of the subjects he had given a lot of thought. “Best I can figure, I sent out some sort of psychic SOS that night, and you caught it. I thought if I tried to call you earlier in the night we’d have more time to…talk. How do you feel when you wake up? Tired?”
“I did at first, when I was seeing into your dreams but not with you. Now that I’m here, and we can talk, I’m not tired at all. I’m energized, revived, as if I had a full night sleep even if it was only a few hours.” The surprise in Trowa’s voice told him this hadn’t been considered before. “Do you know why?”
“This is gonna sound freaky as all hell, but I think you’re sharing my energy. Using some to fill your tanks.” Instantly he could feel the other man withdraw. “Don’t leave, Trowa,” he pled.
“I won’t take energy from you, Duo. You need to save your strength to come back.”
“You’re only taking energy I’m not using, damnit. Don’t leave me.”
“I will not be some sort of…of psychic vampire. I can’t do that to you.”
Hoping to make his point more clear, he explained, “You aren’t doing anything that can hurt me. I never feel drained or anything. You’re using the extra energy my body would be using if I was moving around. I’ve always had a surplus, right? I was told once I have enough energy to supply half of L2 if they could tap into it. You just found a way.”
Trowa fell silent but the warmth reassured him he wasn’t alone. Nevertheless, he breathed a sigh of relief when the other man spoke, sounding pleased. “It’s very quiet here.”
“When I realized what you were planning to do, I decided it was time to face down my demons. Almost everyone here has been put to rest.”
“What made you want to do it? Why so sudden?”
“You were…heading into dangerous things. You don’t understand people like the men you were looking for, Trowa. They’ll hurt you, and enjoy it,” like they enjoyed hurting me. They loved watching my humiliation, danced in glee as I screamed.
“I understand people like those, Duo, more than you think. The place where I grew up was…a lot like this one. That doesn’t matter now. I found one of them. Weren’t you listening to me and Howard earlier?”
He had been so relieved to hear Trowa’s familiar voice he hadn’t paid attention to the words. He had been so happy to know the other man was safe he had let the actual words float in his dark cell without listening. “I was busy, I guess,” he said absently. “You actually found one of them?”
“Skunk. He had…”
“A stripe of white hair. I remember.” Dark eyes over him, chortling with delight as he had begged for them to stop, holding his legs so the others could…
“Duo, stop damnit! Please, God, stop,” the anguish was so easy to hear it replaced all the bad memories with an image of Trowa, staring into the starry sky from aboard Peacemillion.
“What? Stop what?”
If it had been anyone other than Trowa, he would have thought the sound he heard was a sob. “I see what you see in your mind when we’re like this. I can’t bear to see that. I’m sorry, but I just can’t.”
“You see what I see? Everything? Can you hear what I’m thinking?” he asked, on the verge of panic.
“Only that first night, when you hurt yourself.”
“Don’t soft-peddle it, Trowa. I cut my arms open hoping to bleed to death. You heard me then?”
“Yes, but I wasn’t in your mind. It was like I was in the room watching you, but I could hear you in my head. I was trying to yell at you, get you to stop. I kept telling you to call me.” Trowa paused, his voice strained, “When we speak like this, I can see images from your mind. It’s how I knew who to look for. I don’t want you to relive that night, not even in your head.”
The hurt quality of Trowa’s voice made him wonder what the other man was thinking, but he didn’t ask. “Are you giving up on me, then?”
“Never. You can beat this.”
“Not without help. Your help, Trowa. All the voices are gone now, except for one, and I can’t fight it in here. Learning who the other man was will make the voice go away, but there will still be one left. Can you hear it?”
On cue, the man he had heard only one night hissed in his ear, “Such a pretty little dove. I think I’ll have to take something to remember you by, pretty dove.”
“I need to know who he is, Trowa. I can’t fight him in here until I know.”
“I’ll keep looking, I swear. I won’t stop until I find him.” There was a plea there, but he ignored it, already knowing what he had to do, planning to use the newfound ability Trowa had told him about in a way he didn’t want to use it.
“I have to remember. A voice without a face is no help. You have to see his face.”
“Please don’t ask me to do this, Duo. I’ll do anything, but not this.”
“I’m sorry, but this is the way it has to be.” Without words of encouragement or any warning, he made himself remember the worst night of his entire life.