Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ For Our Love ❯ For Our Love ( One-Shot )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

For Our Love

Warnings: YAOI!! Swearing, possibly slight violence, angst, verbal and emotional abuse.

Disclaimers: All characters are copyrighted and belong to their respected owners and no profits are intended from the creation and/or posting of this work of fanfiction. The song used in this fic is by Alanis Morrisette called 'Perfect' found on the album'Jagged Little Pill.' ( It's a good song. I recommend downloading it if you've never heard it before).

~LYRICS~

~Sometimes is never quite enough
If you're flawless, then you'll win my love~

(Heero)

"What the hell do you call this young man?"! I winced as my father's harsh voice vibrated and reverberated in my ears. I looked at the grade, bright red and standing out brilliantly on the crisp white paper of the essay. I looked away, ashamed. I'd known they'd be angry when they saw the A- on the paper. I couldn't have hidden it though because they kept tabs on when things were handed in and they called my teachers to check when they'd be handed back. It was so hard to keep my grades at perfect A's. I had to study constantly. Even though school came pretty easy to me, I had trouble with opinion pieces and poetry in English. And even though I loved music and dreamed of one day playing guitar in a band, I was prohibited from ever even setting foot in the music room at school. My parents didn't believe in that sort of career. In their eyes, it was for bums and vegabonds, leeches on society, my father called them.

I watched my sock-covered feet while my father continued to rant and once he finished, I had to endure my mother's guilt.

"Oh Heero, do you want to end up a bum on the street, or worse, a travelling salesman. Oh god! My son's going to sell vaccuums door-to-door. God help us, what will the neighbors think?" Always what the neighbors think. Jesus Christ They're only the neighbors, mom! They're not the CIA!

I wish I could've said that to her, but if I had, my father would have beaten me to death. I was reduced to clenching my fists so tightly that my fingernails actually made little half-moons in my palms. Some of them even bled a little. In a sick way, I was kind of satisfied, seeing the blood.

My parents made me rewrite the essay and get it re-marked. Miss. Hayasaki took pity on me and gave me the grade she knew my parents were expecting and she explained what I was lacking in my work.

"Heero, it's a very good piece of work if you're analyzing things, but this was an opinion piece on whether or not the forests should be cut down. It lacks feeling. You've gone over every aspect of all opinions involved, but it's dull and boring. You simply analyzed, researched, and then wrote the piece. You didn't even refer to your own opinion which was what you were really supposed to do. There is no motivation or passion in the piece. It is the same with your poetry. Most of it is dull and sometimes very morbid. Do you not have any inspiration at all?" she asked and then continued when I only stared blankly at her, "Now I'm going to mark all of these as A's only because I know what your parents are like, but I expect you to at least try and improve. Find your inspiration, don't wait for it to find you. Now off with you." And as she shooed me out the door of her tidy classroom, I pondered what she had said. My work was dull and boring. Did that mean I was dull and boring too? Why didn't I have any inspiration? Did everyone else have something to inspire them and if so, then where was mine? And how could I get some, and quickly? I though about this all the way to lacrosse practice.

~Don't forget to win first place~

Sweat slid in fat rivulets down my neck and face as I ran across the field and caught the ball with my net and flung it into the net of my enemy. My parents screamed from the bleachers and many of my classmates whooped and cheered as well, but all I could hear was the mantra playing in my head, over and over again. Gotta win. Gotta win. Must WIN!
My father had put me in every single sport there was here. From basketball, soccer, football, and lacrosse, to kendo, karate and swimming. He said that things like curling, golf and tennis were for girls and I certainly wasn't a girl, so I was in every man sport he could enroll me in. And I had to win no matter what. It had to be a perfect score. It couldn't be a close win. It had to be a win by a lot. Even when I was little and other parents were telling their kids it was just a game and to have fun. My dad was telling me to push the wimps out of my way and shine like the star he knew I was supposed to be. I've been competitive all my life because of him.

Finally, the final buzzer sounded and I tore off my helmet and wiped the sweat from my face. My parents were already running towards me. I pasted on my fake smile and waved to them. My mother hugged me and my father clapped me on the shoulder.

"Oh honey, you were excellant!" she exclaimed, planting an over-enthusiastic kiss on my face. I knew there'd be a lipstick smudge there from it. I hated it when she did that.

"You did well son, if not a little on the weak side. Is your knee causing you a problem?" he asked, referring to my old soccer injury from a few years ago. I'd had to undergo surgery and they thought I'd never be able to play as well again, but I had trained and now I could play even better than I had before. I shook my head slightly.

He scowled, "Well then, what is it?" he demanded. I shrugged.

"I'm very tired. I had a really difficult physics test this afternoon. It took a lot out of me." I explained.

"Really? So, you're telling me the test you took while sitting down in a desk in a classroom, physically drained you? And you actually expect me to believe that? It was pure laziness then, wasn't it Heero?" he asked sarcastically.

"I won didn't I? And by plenty last I checked. What was the score? 50 to 34, wasn't it?" I was aggitated and just wanted to go home and shower. He just scowled and pushed me towards the car. He yelled at me the whole way home about disrespecting and talking back to your superiors, meaning him. I just stared out the window. I was going to go out for a bit after my shower, I decided. I was going to search for my inspiration. I wondered where I might be able to buy some?

~Don't forget to keep that smile on your face~

(Duo)

"Duo, how many times have I told you to smile, smile, SMILE! It is one of the most important things while performing. We didn't get your teeth fixed so that you could hide them. You have a perfect smile now and you need to show it off"! My mother exclaimed as she handed me the much needed and deserved waterbottle. I just nodded. This tounament had been a douzy. Nationals. Ugh! She kept on yapping about how I almost lost balance when I was on the balance beam and how I looked like I almost slipped off the bars and why hadn't I put more chalk on my hands. I had worked my ass off at the gymnastics tournament and finished in second place. In the NATIONALS for god's sake! But was she happy? NO! Why hadn't I gotten first place?

Gee, maybe it was the fact that I hadn't eaten anything, but celery and water in the last two weeks. I still needed to lose twenty pounds before my dance recital next week. I was exhausted. I just wanted to go home, to bed, forget the shower. It could wait. But I knew it wouldn't happen anyway. I still had to go through my dance practice tape, go for a jog, and practice my lines for the play at school. I didn't end up getting to bed until 1:00 am. Then I was up at the crack of oh 5:00 am for some more jogging and another dance workout before school. By the time I dragged myself into my desk of my homeroom, I was ready to pass out right there, but I didn't. I still had things to do and grades to earn. I couldn't wait for English class.

~Be a good boy
Try a little harder
You've got to measure up
And make me prouder~

(Heero)

"Heero, we just want you to do well. You'll make us so much prouder. This is all for you. Can't you see that? You'll be the best and we'll be proud to call you our son." my father spouted more of his garbage. You will be proud that I'm your son, meaning you're not already proud of me. I've won every science contest, every sports tournament I was involved in, won numerous awards and am already on the list for five different scholarships. But that's not good enough for you to be proud of me. All because of that one class and that one A-. I stormed out of the room and then out of the house.

"Where are you going?" he called after me.

"The gym." I lied. I didn't know where I was going, but I hoped I'd have better luck finding my inspiration there than I had the other night when I'd been searching. That's when I finally saw her. My inspiration. There she was. In a window, like a beautiful porcelin angel, dancing on the clouds. Well that was right before I found out that she was really a he when I went to help when she collapsed.

~How long before you screw it up
How many times do I have to tell you to hurry up~

(Duo)

"You're still too slow." my mother screeched as I pirouetted for the umpteenth time in a row. I'd been doing this over and over for hours. I still couldn't get the timing absolutely perfect. I was just slightly off cue.
I glanced at the clock. Quarter after eleven. Damn! I still had homework and jogging to do. My vision spun for a moment before I collapsed on the floor suddenly. I heard my mother yelling at me distantly to stop playing around and get back to work. The room spun around me and then he was there, leaning me back onto his bent knees, telling my mother to get some water for me to drink. I looked up at him drowsily. I recognized him vaguely from school. The lacrosse captain, basketball captain, swimming team captain, soccer captain, and football captain. Heero Yuy. If we'd had hockey too, I'm positive he'd have been the captain of that too. He was very attractive just like all my friends had said, of course they were all girls. I watched his eyes, even as I was forced to drink the luke-warm tap water from the bathroom taps. The water fountain was out of order, I remembered dimly.

Those eyes were gorgeous. I just kept watching them as I was pulled up and taken to the café across the street from the dance studio and gym my mother had bought for me to practice in. Heero ordered me a blueberry bagel with cream cheese. I smiled. Mmm... Food sounded really good right about then. I was about to take a bite when my mother snatched it out of my hands and proceded to cut it into thirds. She handed me one.
]
"Remember the diet Duo. You still have seven pounds to lose in the next four days. Oh and that reminds me, I bought the exlax for you as well. You know it will help to speed up the process." She said. I closed my eyes in embarassment. Why was she always like this when boys were around me? I wondered if she intentionally said things like that to scare them away. Did she honestly believe I actually had time to spare going out with boys with the schedule she had set up for me?


~With everything I do for you
The least you can do is keep quiet~


"Mother! Why did you say that when Heero was with us?"! I exclaimed. She raised her eyebrows and put her bony hands onto her thin hips.

"You don't need distractions at the moment, like that what is it? That poetry garbage you're always going on about?" she said nonchalantly. I could feel my face burn with anger.

"It is not garbage. I love it and I'm going to write one day and paint and everyone will love it. You just wait and see. I'll be--" a harsh slap across my face stopped what I had been about to say.

"You will not be anything. You're going to Juliard for ballet and the olympics for gymnastics. Maybe you'll even make it to Broadway for your acting. You know that. Why do you waste your time making up foolish fantasies to indulge yourself?" she asked, pure venom in her voice.

"But I--"

"Oh shut up already. Leave. I'm tired. With everything I do for you, you'd think you'd be even the slightest bit considerate and leave me be when I have a headache." she said as I left the room. I decided not to mention the fact that if she'd stop drinking and popping percassettes that she might feel better. That was a fight for another night. And that night wasn't tonight. I still had things to do.

~Be a good girl
You've got to try a little harder
That simply wasn't good enough
To make us proud~

The night of the recital rolled around. I'd been out of school for two days to prepare and now it was here. Both my grandmother and my mother were there, applying layer after layer of make up. When I looked into the mirror, I no longer saw the boy I'd entered as, I was a beautiful maiden. They wanted me to be a girl so badly. I wasn't even sure of my own gender sometimes. I was never allowed to play rough sports because I was too fragile and deinty for things like that. Or at least that's what they'd told me. Maybe if I'd've been allowed, I would have been friends with Heero.

That night when I got on stage, he was there. Heero was watching me dance and dance I did. I danced like I'd never danced before. Heero inspired me. I didn't even know why. I blushed when I saw him in the halls at school and he would smile at me. Or he'd wink when he walked past the lunch table I was at and my friends would giggle thinking it was them he was looking at, but I knew better. Heero Yuy was gay. I could tell. And the only reason I could tell was because I happened to be gay too. I knew he'd been checking me out in the halls and when he took my mother and I to the café the day I'd collapsed at the studio. And he was definitely checking me out now.

And so I danced just for him. And afterwards, my mother congradulated me and then told me how terrible my expression had been.She wanted to know why the hell my eyes had been closed. My grandmother also yelled at me and told me that it wasn't good enough to make them proud. I didn't care though, because I'd gotten a perfect score, both in the recital and out.

The next day, I even got a note from him. He'd said I was wonderful and beautiful on stage. 'Angelic', I think he'd said. I'd hugged the note to my chest firmly and smiled happily to myself. I had put the note into my poetry journal and still had it in there as I went home. He'd also written me a note asking if I was busy on thursday night and if not, then would I like to come watch his lacrosse game. I'd agreed and hoped I would be able to convince my mother that I'd be at the library at school instead. I'd put that note in my book as well.

My mother believed my fib and I went to the lacrosse game. Afterwards, I watched Heero talk to his parents, then he saw me and waved me over. I bit my lip nervously and walked towards the three of them.

(Heero)

"He looks like a faggot." my father said quietly as Duo approached. I glared at him.

"And if he is?" I asked in reply. My mother looked bewildered and my father turned a dark shade of crimson. He gave me a 'you're not serious' look. I shrugged. If only they knew that Duo wasn't the only homo in their midst. I wonder what they'd think if they knew that their own son was a fag?

"Hey Duo, this is my mom, Lisa, and my dad, Hakkai. Mom, dad, this is Duo Maxwell." I introduced. Duo offered his hand and I saw my dad look at the deinty fingers and glossy-looking finger nails. I could practically taste the disgust eminating from him as he took the hand and shook it firmly. Duo's smile faded a bit at the look my father had locked onto him. He looked almost frightened. I just told my parents I'd meet them at home later. My father looked like he wanted to stop me, but I had already pulled Duo halfway across the field towards the showers.

Duo kept his eyes closed the whole time I was in the shower as he waited for me and even when I stood right in front of him to put my clothes on. He was blushing like crazy and he seemed very anxious to get out of the showers. It was very cute. I was very glad I'd planned this.

I took Duo to the park soon after we left the school. He seemed kind of scared. I tried to reassure him. I don't think it worked, but he did stop fidgeting a bit. We sat down on a bench near the pond in the middle of the park. He looked nervous. I watched him for a few minutes. And then, I had an urge. I reached out and touched the soft, porcelin skin of his cheeks. It was smooth and cool to the touch. Duo jumped when he felt my hand on him. I smiled.

"You really are beautiful, you know that Duo. Like an angel or a porcelin doll. I had to see if you were real. When I watched you dance, I felt like I wasn't even on the same plane of existence anymore. You were so graceful." I said. And then laughed.

"That sounded really dumb didn't it?" I said. Duo just looked at me seriously. I noticed there were unshed tears in his eyes.

"That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. My mom never ever tells me things like that. She hates my dancing. I never do it as well as she wants me to. And none of my friends have ever seen me dance. I never expected to see you, of all people, at my recital the other night. You actually inspired me to dance the way I did." he said sadly. I looked at him for a minute in shock. Not good enough? I'd never seen anyone dance like Duo had at that recital and I'd seen quite a few recitals due to my foster sister, Relena's obsession with tap dancing. She certainly hadn't been able to dance like he had.

"Why would she hate it? I've never seen anybody else dance the way you did. It was amazing. And I was the one who inspired you? Somehow I doubt that." I replied, finally.

"No. When I saw you in the audience and you were looking right at me, I-I just knew I had to show you. I danced for real, with my whole heart. Just for you. It was you that inspired me so." he said seriously. His eyes looked luminous in the moonlight as I looked into them. Moonlight? When had it gotten so late?

"You inspire me too." I whispered as I reached to caress his cheek and pull him closer to my lips. I had barely just met this boy, but yet I had really known him all of my life. He had been on the edges of my life, glancing at me from afar.

"You know Duo. It's so strange. Since I first saw you in the window of your studio, I couldn't stop thinking about you. Everytime I close my eyes. It's you I see dancing across the stage of my eyelids. I fall into your eyes as I look into them, even just in my dreams." I said softly, not really realizing what I had said.

"That's very poetic." he replied. He smiled softly.

"Really? Maybe I should write it down. I need all the poetry I can get for my English class."

Duo laughed softy. It sounded almost like a bell or wind chimes. It was strange, but Duo made me feel poetic. That's kind of corny.

I heard a honk and then the slamming of a car door. Duo looked at me, frightened.

"Duo Maxwell, if that's you, you better get over here right now!" I heard the shrill voice of the woman I vaguely recognized as Duo's mother.

"Oh shit"! I heard Duo whisper as he looked at me, frightened. 'Oh shit' was right.

~I'll live through you
I'll make you what I never was
If you're the best, then maybe so am I
Compared to him compared to her
I'm doing this for your own damn good
You'll make up for what I blew
What's the problem... Why are you crying~


My mother screamed at me long into the night after she'd picked me up with Heero. She told me what a little slut I was becoming and how all that boy would do was hold me back. I tried to explain what had went on, but she just said that she knew exactly what was going on. She'd found the notes in my book and she knew that that boy only wanted in my pants. So she'd gone through my stuff again and she'd even went so far as to check my poetry journal. The nosy bitch!
All of my life my mother had put me down and tried to make me into something I wasn't, the daughter she never had. She lived through me. She'd enrolled me in dance as soon as I hit three years old and then gymnastics soon after. She made me train constantly, so I could and would become the best. I never really cared about her opinion, but I hated being yelled at and so I did as she ordered. I loved dancing, acting, and gymnastics, I really did. I just hated my mother. She had had to quit all of them when she was younger because she'd gotten pregnant with me. I think she's always resented me for it. I hated her and I hated my grandmother too. I was never good enough for them. Never.

And that's when I decided. I was going to leave. I didn't know how or when, but I was going to, no matter what. They were the ones holding me back and I couldn't wait to get away from them. And then the phone rang.

(Heero)

"Where the hell have you been?"! My father bellowed as I entered the hallway. I knew they'd be up waiting for me.

"Out." I answered vaguely as if that would be a good enough answer. I was wrong.

"Out! What do you mean out?" He exclaimed furiously.

"I mean, I wasn't here." I replied softly. I could practically see the vein popping out in my father's neck.

"We know you weren't here, Heero! Stop playing games! You were out with that faggy Maxwell boy weren't you? We talked to some other parents and Mrs.Harris told us that he's in her daughter, Julie's, dance class. He's a damn fairy!" my father spat visciously as his stare burned into me.

"So what?" I said, indifferently. My father's fists clenched and he ground his teeth together.

"So what!? No son of mine is turning into a goddamned faggot!" He screamed. My mother flinched as she sat in the corner, huddled up in her satin nightdress with her stupid curlers in her hair. This was it. I was going to tell them right now. It was as good a time as any.

"It's too late dad. I am one. I didn't just turn into one either. I always have been one. You were too busy trying to live my life to notice." I said. My voice was thick with disdain.

"You're lying! You're doing this just to upset your mother aren't you?" He said, alittle unsurely.

"What do you mean dad? Why don't you believe me? I've always liked guys. Why do you think I never complained when you put me in all those sports? I got to see all those naked boys in the showers and I got to see their tight little asses waggling in front of me while we played. " I said bitterly, loving the way my father's face changed colour from a crimson-purple to an ugly shade of puce. My mother gasped. I smirked.

"Get out! You sick, perverted faggot. Get out!" My father screamed. I practically ran out the door. I walked to Duo's house. I'd found out where he lived through my friend Trowa who was ironically also gay and found out from his boyfriend, Quatre, who happened to be Duo's best friend. I hid behind the bushes in the yard, searching for a window that looked like it would belong to Duo. I didn't have to look far. Duo was out on the roof below his window. He had a blanket draped over his legs and an open book was propped on his knees. He was writing in it.

"Psst, Duo." I whispered loudly. He stopped writing and blinked down at me. His eyes went wide when he realised who it was.

"Heero!" he exclaimed. I put my fingers to my lips in a shushing gesture.

"Heero, what are you doing here?" he whispered this time instead. I shrugged.

"Come out here." I whispered. His eyes widened and he shook his head.

"I can't. My mom will hear me." He replied softly.

"Then I'm coming up." I said. I walked to the climbing roses right below Duo's window and grabbed ahold of them. I felt the thorns bite into my palms and fingers, but I didn't care. I was going to see Duo.
Duo was on his feet when I finally reached the rooftop. He looked somewhat surprised I'd actually climbed up. He looked at me and then caught a glimpse of my abused hands. They were bleeding quite profusely, I noticed belatedly.

"Heero, what did you do?" he asked in alarm. I shrugged.

"I scaled the rose bushes." I said. His eyes widened. He shook his head in disbelief.

"Oh come in here, so I can bandage them. Jesus, scaling the roses." he said as he went inside through an open window. I clambered through it after him. He stifled a giggle as he watched me fall uncerimoniously through the window onto the floor.

"Sit on the bed and I'll be right back." he said as he walked into an adjoining room off to the left. I imagined it would be a bathroom, which I found my assumption to be correct when Duo returned from the other room carrying gauze, cream, and a wet washcloth. He sighed as he knelt down in front of me and grabbed my left hand. I winced and hissed. He dabbed at the various little wounds with the washcloth before putting some polysporin on them and wrapping them tightly in gauze. He then repeated the whole maneuver on my right hand. When he finished, he looked at me expectantly.

"Thanks." I said. He sighed.

"Why are you here Heero?" he asked. I chewed my lip for a minute. How to word this...

"I had an argument with my dad. I told him I was gay and he flipped out. He told me to leave, so I thought it would be okay to come here. Plus, I wanted to see you again." I explained. He half-smiled, half-frowned. All of the sudden I heard footsteps coming towards the door.

"Duo?" the sound of Duo's mother's voice rang clear through the closed door. Duo shook his head at me.

"Yeah mom?" he called back.

"I heard voices. What are you doing? Do you have someone in there with you?" she called.

"I'm just practicing my lines for the play mom, go to bed." he said.

"Oh all right then. Don't forget to smile." she called as I heard her walk away. She sounded kind of drowsy, almost as if she were drunk. Duo sighed in relief.

"Heero..." he murmured. I looked at him. He looked wistful. I reached out and brushed my fingertips along his smooth jaw. He jumped a little.

"What is it?" I asked softly. He looked at me and nibbled his bottom lip.

"Are you staying the night?" he asked. I blinked. I hadn't really thought about it.

"If you'll let me, I guess so." I replied. He looked over at the luminous red light of his digital clock. 1:00 am already.

"You can if you like, but we'll be going to bed like now 'cause I have to be up early tomorrow. And you have to sleep either in bed with me or on the hard wood floor." he said. I looked at the uncomfortable-looking floor even though I already knew I'd much rather sleep with him.

"I'll sleep with you if you don't mind." I said, finally. He smiled a little,soft smile. And I found myself smiling right back. I actually felt like everything would be all right.


~Be a good boy
Push a little farther now
That wasn't fast enough
To make us happy~


Duo was in a play a week after I'd been staying with him. It had been difficult because he'd had to hide the fact from his mom. And he'd had to sneak food in to me. It was a really hard task. Anyway, so Duo had this play and I got to see his mother and grandmother first hand. They practically screamed at him. Plus he was playing a female role. They were obsessing about how beautiful he had to look. They were treating him as if he were a girl. And believe me, when they were through with him, he could have passed for one.

I hadn't thought that Duo was being serious about his mother hating him no matter what he did. I thought he'd been angry and exagerating, but I now realized he definitely wasn't. Both his grandmother and his mother freaked out on him after every scene, while he was changing costumes, at intermission, and after the show. I thought he'd done wonderfully and so did the rest of the cast and the teacher that was running the show. Not to mention the audience who practically showered him in roses. I mean Jesus, you'd think he was a proffessional or something.

Duo was exhausted after the show, mentally and physically. When I climbed in the window that night, I found him curled on his bed in a miserable, sobbing ball. I held on to him and he cried for many hours. He just cried.

"Why can't they just be proud of me?" he asked later after his tears had finally subsided.

"I don't know why Duo. They're just so jealous of you that they can't manage to actually be proud of you. My parents are like that too." I replied. He held on to me tightly all night that night. I didn't know how to comfort him. I'd never had anyone to comfort me when the pressure my parents placed on me became too much and so I didn't know how I should relieve his.


~We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect~


(Duo)

Heero and I decided to move away from my house after graduation that year. My mother nearly had a heartattack when I told her I was leaving. She went ballistic, telling me I couldn't leave her. She even begged me not to go. My grandmother even phoned Heero and I at our new apartment to try and persuade me to come back, but I refused. Heero hadn't spoken to his parents since the fight he had with them before he'd come to live with me. They still attended his games and even his graduation when he won validictorian and six different scholarships. I was so proud of him.

I, myself won three scholarships and an invitation to participate in the world olympics for gymnastics. Which by the way, I came in second for. When I turned nineteen, Heero and I made love for the first time. It was the first time I'd felt completely and perfectly loved. My mother died a year later and I didn't attend the funeral. After college for three years of acting, literature, and dance, I auditioned and was cast in a production on Broadway. Heero and I moved to New York that same month. Heero got a job working for the CIA and I became the star on Broadway. Right now, I'm even getting ready to be in a new movie. How cool is that? When I turned twenty-five Heero purposed and I said yes. We've been living together for seven years now and we couldn't be happier. Heero's parents even came to visit last year. They still want to be in Heero's life. They are still coping with his lifestyle, but at least they're trying. Heero's mother is waiting on grandchildren. Heero and I plan to adopt this year. We can't wait. His parents are coming for Christmas and hope their grandkids are here by then. I hope they are too. Heero's parents don't want perfection anymore. They've finally realised that their son was perfect the whole time. They were just being blind. And now that they've opened their eyes, they've never been prouder. And neither have we.



~Owari~

Love it? Hate it? Let me know please. I don't really know where this came from, but I just had an itch to write it, so R&R please.