Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Gundam Wing and the Gods of Thunder ❯ Midgard ( Chapter 9 )

I'm sorry it took so long to post another chapter! I really have been busy! I swear! *Makes big puppy eyes* I promise I won't make you wait so long for the next one.

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Chapter 9: Midgard

“You know, the smell isn't so bad once you get used to it,” Trowa remarked.

Quatre's eyes were watering. “I think the lining in your nose has just burned away. My eyeballs are melting.”

“You're a sorcerer, Quatre. Can't you do something about it?”

“What, like render these people incapable of excretion? What do you think we're smelling? One thousand years of human waste is probably piled up under our feet.”

“This city isn't that old,” Odin interrupted. “King Olaf's great-great grandfather founded it just over two hundred years ago.”

“Oh great,” Quatre muttered. “Only two hundred years of human waste…”

“Look!” Odin exclaimed. “Here is King Olaf's castle. It's not as impressive as Valhalla, but you'll find it comfortable indeed.”

The castle was a towering structure of stone and wood featuring several large halls connected by wide hallways. The lower floor of each great hall was a vast open space where men and women feasted, gambled and otherwise went about their business. The upper floors contained dormitories and private rooms for important people. Several surrounding buildings connected to the main castle by covered walkways contained storerooms, work areas, kitchens, distilleries and a smithy.

“I think Camelot was bigger,” Trowa remarked quietly to Quatre.

Odin led the way to the central hall in the castle, which was its largest.

“Doesn't it strike you as odd that no one's challenged us at all?” Quatre noted.

“It does seem weird to just walk into a king's castle like this,” Trowa agreed.

Odin walked right up to a broad-shouldered man with a thick red beard and flung out his arms. “King Olaf! I have returned to enjoy your hospitality!”

“Mighty Odin!” King Olaf exclaimed. “You honor my humble castle!” He clasped Odin in a big bear-hug.

Odin struggled briefly to extricate himself and pointed at his two companions. “These two are my honored guests in Valhalla. I have brought them here to experience the joys and wonders of Midgard.”

“Your guests are my guests,” Olaf boomed. He clapped Trowa and Quatre on the shoulder with his two big hands, staggering them.

“You aren't by any chance related to Thor?” Quatre rubbed his suddenly bruised shoulder.

Olaf threw his head back and laughed mightily. “Many have asked me that, but to my knowledge my mother was faithful to my father until his death.” He winked at them. “No telling what happened after that, though. Come, you're just in time for the midday meal.” He led the way to the tables.

When they were seated, Odin leaned toward Olaf. “My friend Trowa here expressed an interest in sailing.”

“Indeed?” Olaf's eyes sparkled. “Any man who loves the sea is a man after my own heart. A man isn't whole unless he's sailing, if you ask me. We'll take my longboat out this afternoon.”

“That sounds interesting,” Trowa said casually. “What about you, Quatre?”

“Oh, I think Quatre should stay here,” Odin said. He smiled innocently. “We haven't yet begun to discuss magic, have we?”

“No we haven't.”

Olaf looked from Odin to Quatre. “Are you a sorcerer, sir?” He eyed Quatre nervously.

“You could say that,” Quatre replied.

“You must be something powerful if the mighty Odin is interested.” Olaf shifted uncomfortably. “I should not want anything ill to befall my house.”

Quatre smiled sweetly. “You have nothing to worry about, King Olaf. I never use magic to cause harm.”

Trowa made a choking sound.

Quatre gave him a dark look.

“That is good to know,” Olaf said uncertainly. He didn't look convinced.

“You have nothing to fear, Olaf,” Odin said expansively. “The Father of all the gods is your guest. What harm could befall your house while I am here?”

“That's true.” Olaf stroked his beard thoughtfully and then he brightened. “Well then, let's eat and go down to the wharves. You'll like my boat. She's the finest ever built.”

They tucked into a tasty meal of roast mutton, fresh bread, boiled potatoes and roast chicken. Of course, every place was set with a brimming tankard of sweet mead.

“I don't like it,” Trowa muttered to Quatre. “I don't want to leave you alone with Odin.”

“I can take care of myself,” Quatre whispered back. “Don't be so overprotective. I'm a Gundam pilot, same as you.”

“Yeah, but what if he starts talking some foreign language you think is pretty? The last time that happened…”

Quatre frowned. “It was just that once. And I've gotten over that.” He dipped his head and looked up at Trowa with enormous blue puppy eyes. “Don't you trust me?”

Trowa scrubbed a hand over his face. “Don't give me that look.”

Quatre blinked once and made his eyes bigger.

“Dammit! Fine! I trust you!” Trowa picked up his tankard of mead and chugged three quarters of it.

“Is there a problem, Sir Trowa?” King Olaf asked.

“No!” Trowa drained his tankard and banged it on the table. “Let's go see this boat of yours.”

“Yes!” Olaf surged to his feet and tipped up his tankard. He drained it in one long pull and smacked it down on the table. “To the sea!” He wrapped a burly arm around Trowa's shoulders and marched away, trailed by several other men all shouting and cheering.

Odin leaned toward Quatre. “Well now, it's just the two of us.” He leered at Quatre suggestively. “Why don't we go somewhere more private for our discussion? You saw how Olaf reacted. We don't want to frighten his people by talking about magic in front of them.”

Quatre regarded Odin suspiciously. “I suppose.”

“Good!” Odin led the way from the great hall and up a flight of stairs. He took Quatre to a large room on the second floor with comfortable piles of cushions on the floor around a low table. “Isn't this nice?” Odin flopped down on the cushions. “Come sit beside me.”

Quatre sat down on the opposite side of the table. “This is fine. So, where do you want to begin?”

Odin grinned at him. “Let me begin by saying how utterly lovely you are, young Quatre. Such delicate beauty as you possess deserves to be favored by the sweetest caresses and the softest kisses. Why don't you come and sit next to me?”

Quatre frowned. “I thought you wanted to talk about magic.”

“And so we shall.” Odin moved around the table and snuggled up against Quatre's back, wrapping his arms around him. “Right after I entertain myself with your loveliness.”

“Odin,” Quatre growled, “I think I should warn you that this is a very bad idea.”

“Beautiful Quatre,” Odin murmured in his ear, “I am the Father of the gods. What harm can your sorcery do me? I have only to wave my hand and your spells will be as nothing.”

“Is that so?” Quatre looked over his shoulder at Odin and growled, “Vos imperiti effeminare apud mammillae grandis!”

Odin grunted. “What words do you speak?” he said and stopped. His voice sounded oddly high-pitched. Suddenly, he pushed away from Quatre and stared down at his chest. Two enormous breasts pushed tight against the inside of his tunic. “What have you done?!” Odin grabbed the big breasts and muttered hastily under his breath. Nothing happened. Then his face went pale and he grabbed his crotch. His mouth fell open and every last trace of color drained away. “What have you done?”

Quatre grinned wickedly. “Let's see you force yourself on me without the equipment, old woman!”

Odin jumped to her feet and began dancing about wildly, alternately smacking at the big breasts, which bounced up and down quite dramatically throughout her antics, and grabbing at her dismayingly flat crotch.

Quatre leaned back against the table and watched.

Odin stopped and pointed at him. “You…! You…! This is not possible! I am a god! You cannot cast a spell on me!”

Quatre examined his fingernails. “So break it.”

Odin threw her hands up in the air and roared, “I am Odin! No power on Earth can touch me!” She waved her hands dramatically. Her big tits swayed from side to side.

Quatre pursed his lips. “Doesn't look like it worked, old lady.”

Odin pointed a shaking finger at Quatre. “You will undo whatever you have done, or… or…”

“Or what?” Quatre lifted an eyebrow. “You'll smother me with your boobs?”

“Argh!” Odin collapsed to her knees and buried her face in her hands. “I am Odin! This is not happening! When I look up, all will be as it was.” Odin opened her eyes. Long gray hair spilled down around her shoulders. Her big breasts strained against the seams of her tunic.

“Look at the bright side,” Quatre said. “You've got all those men living in Valhalla. You shouldn't have any trouble getting laid. At least when they're drunk.”

Odin blinked at him. “Please! Have pity on me! I can't go back to Valhalla like this.”

“Stay here then. I'm sure King Olaf will be happy to entertain you.”

Odin went pale. “I have to get out of here! I'll call Sleipnir and return to Asgard.”

“We're not going anywhere until Trowa gets back.” Quatre stood up. “Why don't you wait here? I'm going down to get another cup of mead.”

Quatre was lounging in the great hall chatting idly with a couple of pretty maids when Trowa and Olaf returned. Quatre lifted his tankard in greeting. “How was sailing?”

“It was great!” Trowa plopped down next to Quatre. “Olaf's longboat is a real beauty. You wouldn't believe how fast she can move through the water propelled only by oars. I tried my hand at rowing for a while. What a workout!” Trowa paused and looked around. “Where's Odin?”

“Upstairs.”

Trowa stared suspiciously at Quatre. “What happened?”

“I told you I could take care of myself.”

“Oh no! What did you do?”

“Nothing permanent,” Quatre chuckled wickedly. “But Odin doesn't know that.”

Trowa put a hand over his face. “Quatre…”

“It serves him right.”

“Roku said your transformation spell wouldn't work on him.”

“I didn't transform him. I shifted him.”

“What does that mean?”

“The sexes really aren't that far apart genetically, you know.”

“You didn't…”

“It will do him good to spend a few days as a woman. He's such a lecher.”

“Quatre! You turned Odin into a woman?”

“Yeah, with big tits.”

“I shouldn't have left you alone with him.” Trowa tried to look stern.

“You're smirking.”

“I'm very angry with you, Quatre,” Trowa said firmly, but his lips kept twitching.

“I can see that.”

“You have to change him back.”

“He'll change back on his own, eventually. Anyway, he wants to go back to Asgard.”

“But we came all this way to learn more about Midgard.”

“We can always come back.” Quatre wrinkled his nose. “Or maybe visit a place that doesn't smell quite so bad.”

“There's that.”

“Anyway, let's stay for dinner. We can sneak Odin out after dark.”

“Sounds good.” Trowa took off his staff and dropped it on the floor. “Go keep an eye on Odin, would you?”

“Of course, Master,” the snake hissed and it slithered off, keeping out of sight under the tables.

It was well after midnight when Trowa and Quatre escorted Odin back out to the field where Sleipnir had dropped them off. Odin alternated between weeping pitifully and angrily demanding that Quatre restore her.

“Geez! Quit whining!” Quatre exclaimed. “I spent several days as a woman getting violated every which way and I didn't whine as much as you.”

“But I am Odin! And what did you tell King Olaf?”

“We said something had come up in Asgard that required your attention,” Trowa replied patiently. “He doesn't know. So whistle up this horse of yours and let's get out of here.”

Odin put her fingers to her lips and uttered a piercing whistle. After a few minutes, the thunder of Sleipnir's hooves could be heard. The great gray stallion galloped up to them and skidded to a halt. Then he fixed his big brown eyes on Odin with a look of equine shock and tossed his head up and down.

Trowa burst out laughing.

“What did he say?” Quatre inquired.

“He said Odin makes one butt-ugly woman.”

“What?!” Odin exclaimed.

Quatre snickered.

“I am the Father of the gods!” Odin grumbled under her breath.

The three of them leaped onto Sleipnir's back and the stallion charged up into the sky, his eight legs churning the clouds.

“You will speak of this to no one!” Odin ordered sternly. “Once I stand again in the plains of Asgard, I shall be restored and then my retribution shall fall!”

“Give it a rest, Odin!” Trowa cried over the rushing wind. “It's not like you're the first person to end up on the wrong side of one of Quatre's spells. It will wear off. And you shouldn't have tried to force him. Quatre's particular.”

“A mere mortal should be honored to earn the favor of the gods!”

“Quatre is no mere mortal,” Trowa said proudly. “Anyway, just keep in mind that Quatre's power is completely dwarfed by Roku's. You don't want to upset him by threatening his Mama.”

“Roku would never hurt anyone!” Quatre interjected immediately.

“We've never seen him angry, Quatre.”

“Good point.”

“You say the spell will wear off?” Odin grumbled.

“Eventually. I think. Although it's not really a transformation, so…”

“What?!”

“Don't worry. It will be fine. Trust me.”

Another beautiful dawn in Asgard was lightening the sky when they landed in front of Valhalla. Odin immediately scurried for the door, obviously hoping no one would see her. She was out of luck. As she pulled the vast door panel open, Thor appeared on the other side.

“What ho, old woman?” Thor thundered. Then he peered more closely. “What are you doing in Odin's tunic?”

Odin drew herself up. “I am Odin, you imbecile!”

Thor stared with his mouth hanging open.

Sleipnir collapsed onto his back, waving his legs in the air and snickering loudly.

Odin flushed a deep red. “I decided to view the world from a woman's point of view,” she declared grandly. “In my vast capacity as the Father of the gods, it is only right that I expand my omnipotent knowledge by…” She stopped in shock.

Thor poked one of her big breasts experimentally. “It's real!” He grabbed Odin's tits and squeezed, massaging the big boobs up and down. “Amazing! They feel just like real breasts!”

Odin slapped Thor's hands away. “They are real, you jackass! Quit fondling me!”

“Uh, right!”

Trowa pointed a shaking hand. “Feel her up some more, Thor! She hasn't got balls either!”

Thor's eyes went round and he immediately clapped a big meaty hand between Odin's legs. “I'll be damned!”

“Eeep!” Odin squeaked. She leaped backward.

Trowa collapsed to the ground, laughing hysterically.

Quatre put a hand over his mouth, trying without success to stifle his laughter.

“You will not treat me this way!” Odin declared. “I am the Father of the gods…”

“You look more like the Mother of the gods right now,” Thor remarked innocently.

“I will have your head for that!” Odin shrieked. “Where is my sword?”

“Now, now!” Thor held up his hands. “Let's not get all excited…”

“What's all the commotion about out here?” A few heroes drifted out of the hall. “Who's this old woman?”

“I am not an old woman!” Odin screamed.

More and more people began wandering outside, until a large crowd of heroes and gods had surrounded Odin.

“Ho, Frig!” Thor called. “I think your husband will have to shirk his duties for a few nights.”

“He's always shirking his duties,” Frig replied stiffly as she came out of the hall. “He's gone off to Midgard to play with that pretty blond boy Frey brought.”

“No, he's back,” Thor pointed, “and wearing teats bigger than yours.”

Frig stared. “What is the meaning of this, Odin? Is this yet another way for you to avoid performing your husbandly duties with me?”

“It's nothing like that,” Odin said quickly. “It's just a brief experiment…”

A couple of heroes leered at him. “It looks real enough,” said one. A curious hand pinched Odin's bottom. “Shall we go a few rounds in the name of science?”

“Stop that!” Odin slapped the hand away. “I am the master of Valhalla. You will show proper respect!”

“I'm feeling very respectful.”

“Me too.”

The heroes began crowding closer.

“You can't really be Odin.”

“Yeah, we can't have you running around calling yourself Odin and tarnishing his reputation.”

“That's right. You need to be shown your proper place.”

“What are you doing?” Odin squealed. “Get your hands off me! Thor! Stop them! Help me!”

Thor stood back and folded his arms across his massive chest. “Well now, what if they're right and you're not really Odin?”

“I AM ODIN!” Odin shouted and then she disappeared under a wave of groping hands.

Trowa gasped for breath. “Quatre! You really should change him back before they…”

“Why?” Quatre smiled innocently. “Think of it as poetic justice for all the women and boys he's violated over the centuries. Shall we go back to Frey's house and see how the others are doing?”

“Sure.” Trowa staggered to his feet.

But before they could leave, Thor clapped big hands on their shoulders and stopped them. “So is that Odin or not?” he rumbled.

“It's Odin,” Quatre said.

Thor stared suspiciously. “You had something to do with this, I think.”

Quatre blinked innocently. “I could explain it to you if you like.”

Thor paled. “That's all right!” He released them quickly. “I don't need to hear it! Go about your business. I'll take care of Odin before this gets out of hand.” Thor weighed into the crowd, clouting men aside casually. “Enough of this! Stop at once, I say!” He reached down into the mass of men and yanked Odin up and over one shoulder. The disheveled Father of the gods was swearing furiously and promising diving retribution to all and sundry. Thor smacked her on the butt. “Calm down, Odin. Let's go inside and have some breakfast and you can explain the purpose of your experiment to everyone but me.”

Odin continued to swear as Thor carried her inside.

Trowa put an arm around Quatre's shoulders. “You really are going to have to apologize to him later.”

“Yeah, I suppose so.”

“You really have to stop turning people into stuff when they tick you off.”

“Oh, like you're not glad I did it.” Quatre punched him gently in the ribs. “You were afraid I'd let him get away with something.”

“Well…”

“Admit it.”

Trowa grinned. “Ok, I admit it. Let's go back to Frey's house. I want to find some place quiet and see how much I can get away with.”

Quatre lifted an eyebrow at him.

“You owe me for the puppy eyes earlier.”

Quatre chuckled. “Oh, very well. But I want breakfast and a nap first. I didn't get any sleep last night.”

“Sounds good to me.”