Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Harry Potter's gonna puke ❯ Harry Potter's gonna puke ( Chapter 1 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Title: Harry Potter's gonna puke
Author: Vega-Lume
Disclaimer: The boy's are not mine, and the idea isn't either.
Pairing: 1+2
No beta
For the Amusing fic challenge based on real life events issued by Shinigamiinochi Shii
Note: Okay sadly this is a true story. I worked at a movie theater for 18 months back in 04 and 05. No I'm not this Harry.
Harry Potter's gonna Puke
By Vel
“Heero!” Duo shouted over the crowd of adults and children who poured into the theatre to watch the midnight showing of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.
Heero glanced across the hall where his co-worker stood, holding open the door for auditorium 4.
“What?” He called back, ignoring the child at his feet dressed as his favorite wizard. Cos-players at a movie premier, well at least wands were better then the swords that appeared during Lord of the Rings.
“Fei wants us a12 when were done here.” Duo said jerking his thumb in the direction of auditorium 12.
Heero nodded in acknowledgement and waited for the last of the robed and wanded stragglers to find their seats.
Once the main hall was mostly empty the two friends had their way to the second half of the building where auditoriums 7 - 12 were located. The hall was filled with costumed movie patrons' waiting for the 12:15 showing to start and trying to get to the end of the hall was like a salmon moving up-stream in spawning season.
Duo and Heero squeezed their way through the throng of costumed buffoons to reach the last auditorium at the end of the hall.
“Say, Heero.” Duo began “What are we supposed to do until the show drops? I mean what would be the point of cleaning the restroom if they are just going to piss all over it in two hours?”
“That's up to Wufei; he'll find something for us to do until 1 through 6 drop.”
* * *
During the two and a half hours while the movie played, Heero and Duo split up doing various custodial jobs like dusting the vents in the restrooms and making trash runs to the compactor in the basement.
By the time the guests began streaming out. All of the public places in the theater were spotless, just waiting to be trashed.
Heero and Duo stood across the hall from each other holding the doors for the guests leaving the show.
Finally at 3am the auditoriums were empty and ready for cleaning.
And just as they though, they were a disaster.
As the boys climbed through the rows of red seats with trash bags in their hand Heero noticed that Duo had stopped and was rummaging around on the floor.
“Duo, what are you doing?” Heero asked as he tossed a paper cup into his bag.
“Harry potter found a wand.” Duo replied as he rose waving a wand around.
Heero rolled his eyes and dumped a half tray of toxic `Super Nachos' into his bag. “Stop goofing off and get back to work.”
“Harry Potter doesn't like your tone. Harry Potter will only reply when you say Harry Potter's name.”
“Duo…” Heero began then stopped when the other both threw him a pointed look. “All right, all right I'll play along. Harry will you please get back to work.”
“Harry Potter wants a cape.” Duo grinned with his arms crossed over his chest.
Heero grumbled under his breath and looked around the auditorium in search of more costume pieces. After about ten minutes he managed to find a robe that was a bit short, a pair of plastic glasses and someone's lipstick that he used to make the lightning bolt.
Once Duo was fully transformed he happily snatched up his trash bag and went back to work.
“Duo, Heero. Break time.” Wufei called an hour later. During that hour they had managed to get all of the large trash from 4 of their 6 auditoriums.
“Harry Potter needs a smoke.” Duo chirped and snagged Heero's arm, dragging outside.
“That's sacrilegious,” Heero stated, stumbling after his friend, leaving a bewildered Wufei in their wake.
“Harry Potter?” Wufei questioned as the three of them stood out in the early morning chill, puffing on their brand of choice.
“He insists on being called Harry Potter, he is even speaking in the third person.” Heero said then took a drag from his Liggett.
Wufei chuckled and turned to his costumed friend. “So Harry, where's your broom.”
“Harry Potter hasn't found one yet.” Duo replied taking a drag from the cigarette he had bummed off of Heero.
“Has he been like this all night?” Wufei asked of Heero.
“Yeah, he found a wand in theatre 1 and that was it.” He dropped his butt and snubbed it out with the toe of his shoe.
A few minutes later the three re-entered the building and turned back to their assigned jobs.
In theatre 5 Duo founds his broom, which happened to be one of the custodial brooms, and tied a trash bag on it in a way that it could be worn across his back like a quiver of arrows.
Heero watched as his friend bobbed up and down in the lower section using a duster to pull the debris out from under the seats. Duo wound bend at the waist, scoop out the trash then stand up straight only to repeat the action again and again.
After about forty seats Duo began to slow down.
“Duo…I mean Harry are you okay?” Heero asked as he watched his friend sway on his feet.
“Harry Potter's getting dizzy.” Duo said standing upright, then suddenly turned and hurried through the isle.
“Harry Potter's gonna puke.” And with that Duo bent over a trash can, spilling out his wizardly guts.
Heero winced at the sound of the retching and swallowed firmly so not to join in the festivities.
Dropping his dust mop, Heero made his way down to the bottom of the auditorium and pulled Duo's water bottle off of their cleaning cart.
“Duo are you okay?” Heero asked offering his friend the water.
“Harry Potter's busy. Harry Potter says go away.” Duo mumbled his head still inside the can.
Heero laughed and opened the water. “Heero Yuy wants Harry Potter to drink some water.”
Duo lifted his head enough to see his friends face and smiled at him weakly. “Harry Potter thanks you.” He replied and accepted to water, using some to rinse out his mouth.
“Let's trade, you can dust mop and I'll dust the rows.” Heero suggested when his friend had recovered enough to get back to work.
Duo readily agreed and they went back to work.
Now, several years later Duo's co-workers still call him Harry when ever there is a Harry Potter movie and Heero still teases him… “Harry Potter's gonna puke.”
Owari
As I said, sadly this is a true story. And yes we still talk about our friend who dressed as Harry, spoke in the third person and threw up after getting dizzy dusting the front rows.