Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Lingering Hearts ❯ Chapter Three ( Chapter 3 )

Lingering Hearts

Chapter 3

Duo

Ok, see, I had been helping Trowa pick out a ring for Quatre on Saturday. Did I mention he was going to ask Q-man to marry him at the Christmas party? About time, they've only been together for eight years. Anyways Trowa and I were taken to the back room to look at some rings. For a change Mr. Silence was so nervous he was pretty talkative and didn't even notice Heero looking at a display of crosses. But I did and right as I was about to get the guts and say something to him he started to turn towards me and our eyes met for a split second, then Relena walked in and saw him and he looked away just as fast. I watched in amusement as he squirmed under her gaze. She never would give up on trying to get him. I realized Trowa was talking to me. He wanted me to hurry up. I slap myself on the forehead for agreeing to this and walk through the doorway to the back room.

Two hours and a bazillion rings latter, Trowa finally picks a big diamond that has an aquamarine tent to it. Just like Quatre's eyes. Man, he's got it bad. Of course by the time we are done Heero and Relena are both gone. I stop at the counter display Heero was looking at. It was breath taking. There was an empty spot where someone had bought some thing then beside that empty spot was the golden cross necklace Heero had been looking at. I almost past out there, I couldn't believe that this necklace was an exact replica of the one I gave Heero on our first anniversary. I couldn't believe he would be looking at it. There was no question in my mind what I wanted to get him for Christmas. I purchased the necklace and dropped Trowa off then went home. I was so ecstatic, for the first time in nearly two years, Heero had looked into my eyes and I felt that same thing that's been dormant for so long. I felt his love for me. Some how, I know he will be at Quatre's Christmas party. God, I can wait. I just hope he has forgiven the things I said and did.

***Flashback

Two years ago, Christmas Party

"Heero, why are you so gloomy? I thought you were excited to come."

"Duo, lets just enjoy the party, I-I'll tell you later tonight." Heero said, getting up. "Come on, let's dance."

"Alright, something is wrong, you hate to dance and since when do you stutter? Heero, what's going on?" Duo locked his legs around the chair. "I'm not moving until you tell me?"

"Duo, please, not right now. I don't want to ruin our last nig-." He stopped. He didn't want to break this on Duo, not now.

"Did you just say our last night? What do you mean our last night?" Duo asked, breathing very hard in a shaky voice.

"Forget about it angle, I just, I just, just forget about it, Okay?"

"There's the stutter again. Heero Yuy, come with me right now, and you are going to tell me what the hell you are so upset about and what the fuck you mean by our last night ." Duo said, this was really starting to piss him off. `What the hell could effect him so much.'

"Fine, where are we going?" Said a surrendered but very pissed Heero. His heart seemed to defy gravity as it rose into his throat. He was mad that he had to do this. Mad that Duo was already mad. Scared to death to think what it would be like to live with out Duo. Scared to know he had to.

"I don't know yet, somewhere alone." Duo ended up leading them to an unused bedroom.

The boys walked in and Duo shut the door behind them. Heero was very quiet as he walked away from where Duo stood by the closed door.

Heero walked over to the balcony doors and opened them up into the night. He bathed himself in the cool night air. It was unusually warm for being December. He was trying to prepare himself for what had to be said. Heero took in a deep breath before turning back to Duo, he began.

"Duo, I love you, with all my heart, my soul, my mind and body. There isn't a second that goes by I don't think of you. You know that, right? You know that no matter what, I love you. With everything I am. If it wasn't for you…I don't know where I'd be." Heero gushes out in an extremely emotional, uncharacteristic gesture to show his feelings toward Duo. Then he adds, his voice suddenly dropping into a quiet somber tone. "Probably dead. Duo you saved my life the day you looked into my eyes."

"Yes, I know. Heero, what's this about? You are starting to scare me. You are acting so different." Duo said walking up to Heero, taking his hand and lacing their fingers together. He didn't look up for he was afraid of what he would see. "Heero, tell me what's wrong. The way you are right now. It's not you." Heero lifted Duo's chin up so he was looking into his eyes and pressed his lips upon Duo's ever so lovingly and caring, his free hand caressing Duo's cheek before finally pushing him away, turning towards the open balcony going into perfect soldier mode.

"Duo, Relena contacted me yesterday. The preventers are in a situation. She needs me for a mission. I have to assume a new identity and get close to the target. Peace could be at risk again. I'll be gone for three months. My bags are being packed as I speak." Heero said completely devoid of all emotions now as only the perfect soldier could.

"YOU ACCEPTED, FUCK HEERO, PEACE IS ALWAYS THREATENED. BUT I THOUGHT WE AGREED NO MORE MISSIONS. HOW COULD YOU HEERO? AND FOR THREE MONTHS? HAVEN'T WE GIVEN ENOUGH?" Duo screamed. He turned around so fast his braid flew like a blade as he punched the wall, leaving a dent, his hand still pressed against the wall, supporting him. He got deathly silent as he whispered. "I thought you love me enough to stop putting yourself in harms way. I guess I don't mean as much as your precious missions." Duo turned back to Heero, absolutely pissed now. And yelled "WHY DON'T YOU SAY ANYTHING?" Duo ran at Heero and ripped the golden cross from his neck.

"And this must not mean a god damned fucking thing either" he said in a completely impartial tone as he held it up in the moon light, studying it. "and the promise in it we made when the war ended. That we'd never leave each other's side to fight again. That we'd always be together. That we wouldn't put ourselves in danger because it would hurt the other to badly. That doesn't matter to you does it?"

"Don't do this Duo, give it back. Of course it matters to me. You mean every thing to me. It's not as big of a deal as you are making. Three months. It's not forever. We've been apart before and it was always ok." Heero said, trying to take Duo's hand.

Duo backed up farther, as if Heero was a monster, still clutching the cross like a lifeline.

"But that was for the war and The Preventers. We got out of that. Don't you remember? We got out of the Preventers. I thought you were done with Relena. I thought you loved me. Not her"

"Duo, stop, please, don't be so mad. I said no at first. I really did, it's just, this is really important. I can't tell you details, there could be someone listening. But there are many lives at steak." Heero tried to plead. "and I do love you. Only you." But Duo wasn't listening anymore. He was too consumed by the pain of Heero leaving him for three months. For him breaking their promise.

"NO, you just don't care about us any more. And neither do I. You drop everything every time that wench asks you too. You don't love me. You really love her. You always have haven't you. You want to see how much I value our so-called love. This much." And Duo threw the golden cross out the balcony. They watched as it fell down the cliff side and into the water, lost forever. "I hate you Heero Yuy. I wish I never laid eyes on you. And I'm not just saying that to hurt you. You've hurt me so many times. Broke so many promises all in the name of war. Made me cry so many times. I can't take it any more. You've driven me over the edge. Driven me to attempt suicide more than once. I-I-I'm glad you leaving. Maybe I can finally have some peace in my life and heal. I'll never be better when you are here."

"DUO, YOU DON'T MEAN THAT. STOP THIS. IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED? YOU WANTED ME TO TALK, WELL I AM NOW." Heero grabbed him by the shoulders, lowered his face to Duo's so close that he could feel Duo's hot breath on his lips and said in a voice barely above a whisper. " But if you don't care about us anymore, its all the more reason for me to take this mission. But I do love you Duo. As maddening as you are, god help me I'm in love with Y-O-U." He pressed his lips against Duo's and the braided boy melted into his kiss. Heero breaks the sweet kiss. "Forgive me Duo, I have to do this. Just remember that I love you, not Relena. She's just a friend. Okay. She just needs help. So many lives are at steak." With that Heero walked passed Duo and towards the door with the look like he'd kill anyone or thing, woman or child, young or old that crossed his path. Duo could see the reflection on the mirror into the window of his face.

"NO…. NO….. STOP, THE WAR IS OVER, and we don't have to fight anymore." Duo had silent tears streaming down his cheeks. "The war is over Heero Yuy. And if you walk out that door" Duo was shaking uncontrollably. Their backs were to each other. Heero's hand on the doorknob and Duo looking down now, shaking, crying, his eyes only black shadows. His voice dropped so low that a normal human being could not hear it. But Heero isn't normal and he did hear him. "If you walk out that door Heero Yuy, then everything we've had together is walking out too." Duo waited to hear his footsteps come back but all he heard was the sound of a door opening and closing as Heero walked out of his life. If Duo had been listening harder, he would have heard Heero whisper, "I'm sorry angle. I love you" one last time.

***End flashback

I'm going to think about something else. I'm not going to think how mad he was that I made him choose. How I threw that cross out. I'm not going to think how he'd still be hear if I hadn't been such a jerk. I just couldn't stand the fact that he dropped everything for Relena again. Okay…. What else can I think about? Hey that's good. It's like a week left until Christmas. I haven't even started shopping yet. Quatre always has a big Christmas party at his mansion and we all get together. Well, almost all of us. Heero didn't show at it last year. I almost didn't either, the memories of the year before that hurt too much, but hey, lets not think about that. It's almost Christmas. Yeah. Ok, now what to get for the girls, Hilde, Noin, Relena, and Dorothy, it's easy. I'm giving them a gift card for clothes. They can pick their present and I don't have to worry about offending anyone by getting the wrong size. Then there is Quatre, what do you get a guy who has all the money in the world for Christmas. Guess I'll have to be creative with his. Then Trowa. The guy doesn't speak. Maybe I could get him some therapy sessions so he'd speak more. Ha, just kidding, that's mean. Holly shit, I've got it. I just thought of the perfect gift for both Quatre and Trowa. Life size cardboard cut outs of each other. Then they can always be together. Aww. They are so lovey dovey. Okay, that's them, but what about Wufei. That guy can be so strange. He likes swords. I'll get him on of those then. That leaves Heero. Some how I know he is going to show this time. I already got him something anyways. You never know. Maybe he's not so mad anymore. He's had almost two years to get over it. …to get over me. But hey, I'm pretty sure whatever it was that he was so mad at to make him leave; it must be better, right? When he looked into my eyes at the Jewelry store, it was like old times. And if not, if I was wrong about what I felt, I'll just have to live with it.

Heero

Last Saturday I was with Quatre, he dragged me along with him to find the `perfect' gift for Trowa. We went from store to store, looking at everything. We were in some store, there was so many they just all ran together so I couldn't tell you which one it was. But I heard the door open and her Royal Pain in the Ass walked in. I had to get out of there. I said one word to Quatre as I was leaving before she saw me. "Relena" Quatre understood. I went into the neighboring store to wait for Quatre to be done. I decided I might as well look around, Quatre had only just begun his search in the previous store, and it would be a while. I was inside a jewelry store and there was this case beside me of diamond cross necklaces and earrings. They were breathtaking. There was a golden cross in the middle all of it. It was beautiful. It was almost an exact replica of the one Duo had given me so many years ago. When we broke up almost two years ago, Duo had ripped it off my neck and threw it out the balcony, to be lost in the sea forever. God, he was so mad. I asked to see it. She took it out of the case and as she did the moment I saw the diamond studded cross earring that was sitting beside it, I thought of Duo. He had one that looked a lot like this during the war, but somehow it got lost. I remember walking into his room to tell him we had another mission and found him crying. And before I knew it I was lost in another memory.

***Flashback***

Gundam Safe house

Heero was walking down the hallway to Duo's room. The Dr.'s had just sent another mission they had to complete tomorrow. He thought he heard sobbing but wasn't sure until he knocked on Duos door.

When the night falls down
I wait for you
And you come around
And the world's alive
With the sound of kids
On the street outside

"G-G-Go away" Duo sobbed over the oldies station playing.

Taken aback by that Heero just stood there a minute before opening the door. He'd seen Duo upset before, he hadn't been this bad. Here was Duo. Sitting at the foot of his bed sobbing.

"I said go away" Duo spat at Heero in a stuffy voice. He was trying to stop crying. The last thing he wanted was for Heero to have another thing to yell at him about. But the perfect soldier was cracked away when he saw Duo crying and he wanted to comfort him for some reason.

"Duo, what's wrong?" Heero asked, sounding a bit funny as he wasn't one to use a concerned tone often.

When you walk into the room
You pull me close and we start to move
And we're spinning with the stars above
And you lift me up in a wave of love...

"Why do you care, you'd just tell me I was weak if you knew. So just, just leave me ALONE" with that Duo began to cry again. And when Heero just stood there, not really knowing what he should do. Should he comfort him or just leave as he asked, he charged him and tried to push him out throwing punches hysterically. Heero grabbed his arms and pulled him close, trying to stop his frantic blows and wrestling him to the ground. Eventually Duo stopped fighting and collapsed into more tears. He ended up in Heero's lap.

"Duo, what's wrong?" `You don't have to hold it all in, you can tell me.' He thought to himself. Not having the courage to tell him what he wanted.

"…"

"Duo, are you going to tell me what you were crying about?"

"My earring."

"Your earring, your kidding, it was just an old earring. I'm sure you can get another one."

"It's not the earring its self, you don't have to be so incredibly incentive, it's the memories that were in it. It's all I have left from life at the orphanage. It was the only thing good in my life."

"I'm sorry Duo." Heero was just lately realizing how much Duo meant to him, and he didn't want him to hurt. He wasn't sure what exactly to say. They had lived together in this safe house for a month now, and had been fighting this war together since the very beginning. He hadn't meant to be insensitive; he just didn't know how to act.

"Why do you care so much all of a sudden, yesterday you'd kill me rather than look at me. What's with this sudden change." `And why am I in his lap?' he thought to himself. `Why don't I feel mad he would just go and pull me into such an intimate position? Why, because I've loved him since I met him, that's why. God, how can I fall for Heero Yuy. He'd kill me."

When I feel alone
I reach for you
And you bring me home
When I'm lost at sea
I hear your voice
And it carries me

"I-I don't know. I just saw you crying and wanted to comfort you. Though I don't really know if I'm doing it right."

"You are" Duo answered back, his now silent tears subsiding, and snuggled his head under Heero's chin. "Heero" Duo said breathlessly

"Yes"

"This is nice, us sitting here. You know, I've been falling in love with you more and more every time I see you." He felt Heero tense. `What the fuck am I saying. Why would I tell him this. Well, I've said this much, just finish what you have to say Duo. Come on now, you can do it.'

"I didn't think you would ever care about me. I always thought you weren't capable of it. But now, it's just , I think you can love, you can have feelings. You showed just now that you do have them. Heero, I care about you a lot. I- I- I thinkIevenloveyou." Duo said really fast. Waiting for Heero to hit him for being weak or to get up and leave and be disgusted that he was gay. He didn't expect him to say anything because he highly doubted that Heero was gay. That's probably why he jumped a little when Heero sighed, wrapped his arms tighter around Duo and began to speak.

"Duo, I've never had emotions like these before, I've always been the perfect soldier. If we are being honest here, the fact is I do have them now. And I find myself, well, liking you more and more. I think about you all the time. You take my breath away. When you're around, I want to smile, I want to be better, and I want to be able to love you. . Duo, you deserve some one who can love you the way you need, who can show their emotions, hell, someone who can smile and laugh and joke with you. But I just don't think I'm capable of that. I don't think I could ever love you the way you deserve. I can't give you what you need. And that's why you cant love me. That's why you cant have feelings for me."

And with that he let go of Duo and slid out from under him. But Duo wasn't about to let him leave. Not after they had both just said what had been said. He darted to the door and shut it before Heero could leave.

"But you don't understand, the fact that you love me enough to have someone who could love me better, it shows there is no one else who loves me more than you. And as for being able to show emotion and laugh and smile, I can teach you that. Don't you see Heero? Don't you see you're what I need. I've lived so long not being able to hug and kiss you. But I'm changing that. There's no fucking way that I'm going to pass this chance up. Something possessed you to tell me this. You're not leaving me now. The orphanage may have been the only good thing in my past, but if I have you in my future" he stopped, he had almost been yelling to get his point across. "…it would be the most wonderful thing in the world." He said in almost a whisper.

Duo grabbed Heero's shirt and twirled him around so Heero's back was the one against the door. He wrapped his arms around Heero's neck and Heero wrapped his arms around Duo pulling him as close as humanly possible. Both boy's were extremely tense. Duo placed his lips against Heero's lips. Their kiss starting out slow and growing in passion as the boys relaxed. And right there, they shared the first kiss of thousands to come. Their tongues battling fiercely for dominance. Just as Heero's gains the upper hand, Duo pulls back.

"Heero, will you be in my future, I can't imagine up going back the way we were."

"Don't worry Duo, I'll always be in your future. I don't think I could go back either." Heero leaned down and kissed Duo lightly on the lips a few times. He could feel Duo's hands running down his back searching for the end of his shirt…

…the door to the Jewelry shop opens and pulls him out of his memories.

***end flashback

Duo walked in with Trowa. Speak of the devil. I saw them walk across the store with a lady who led them to a back room where the really expensive jewelry is.. Trowa must be finally going to ask Quatre. Took him long enough. It's been, what, eight years. This could be the perfect excuse to talk to him again. I'll speak to Trowa, and then it's only polite to speak to Duo.

I turned towards them and my eyes met Duo's for a second before the door opened and I break the eye contact to see Relena walked in. Fuck. When I turned back Trowa was dragging Duo into the room with him. It looked like he was about to say some thing to me. Seconds after they were gone Quatre came in with an apologetic face. Relena was jabbering away in my ear, flaunting her cleavage. I wonder what she'd do if I told her I was gay. Somehow, through all the years of me with Duo, she never picked up on it. She is just that stupid. I wanted to get Quatre out of here incase my guess about Trowa was correct. Quatre had asked me if I would go to the Christmas party as I was trying to usher them out of the store. I decided I would go to the Christmas party this time. That meant I had to get something for Duo. I knew exactly what to get too. I bought the earring that looked like the one Duo had for him for Christmas. We ditched Relena, and then Quatre and I went back to looking for the perfect gift. He finally found it and I got the rest of my Christmas shopping done for the party. But I haven't been able to stop thinking about how I felt for that split second our eyes met. That hole that's been growing in me had, for a split second, been filled. Maybe, just maybe, Duo has forgiven me.

***

Im an oddball and I like doing the disclaimers at the end of the third chapters (no, really that's just something else I forgot to do and I'm way to lazy to fix it and reload up a whole two chapters. But the oddball thing's right.)

Disclaimer one. We all know I don't own any of the Gundam Wing stuff talked about.

Disclaimer two. I don't own the song or anything about Nsync and God must have spent

A little more time on you.

Disclaimer three. I'll warn you now…there is a lemon coming up in one of the next chapters. Arg…I'm not very good at it..

Disclaimer four. I don't own the song Heaven Is A Place On Earth by Belinda Carlisle

Okay…im gonna go eat lunch now…I decided to re write this chapter…so here it is…grr..that means I gotta go and edit the other 3 chappies that I already have done after this one. I know I said I would update faster if I had lots of reviews…I had one..but it was such a nice review…I decided to give you chapter 3…MUAH….thanx for reading my fic..