Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Lost Soldiers Arc ❯ Building Bridges ( Chapter 10 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Kracken 
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 09.16.2002 | Pages: 4 | Words: 6.4K | Visits: 434 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 09.16.2002 | Pages: 4 | Words: 6.4K | Visits: 434 | Status: Work In Progress
Kracken
Disclaimer: I don't own them and I don't make any money off of this.
Warnings: Guys talking about having sex with guys. Language. Violence. Graphic. Wu Fei the masochist and maybe not so much of a jerk.
The Lost Soldier Series
Sequel to A Hundred Strokes#9
I
Building Bridges#10
"Heero," Wu Fei said calmly, staring at the barrel of the silencer. "Would you like to tell me what you think you're doing? You do remember that the war is over, don't you?"
"Tell that to Zechs," Heero replied stonily.
"Zechs isn't my friend," Wu Fei said, "and I'm not your enemy. I'm working for Relena now as her Head of Security, but you know that. I've sent you enough messages, messages you didn't answer."
"No point," Heero replied.
Wu Fei frowned sharply. "No point?" he echoed angrily.
Heero's head jerked impatiently. "This conversation is at an end. Try to stop me, or call for security, and I will kill you."
"You won't kill me," Wu Fei replied arrogantly. "It's against your training to kill non combatants."
Wu Fei dared to slowly reach up and carefully push the gun barrel away from his forehead. Sweat trickled down his sides, but he wasn't a coward. He wasn't sure that his words to Heero were true, but if Heero did try to kill him, Wu Fei intended to die in action, not cowering and begging for his life.
"Answer one question and then I'll pretend that I never saw you," Wu Fei bargained. "It's no business of mine if you want to make trouble for Milliardo Peacecraft."
"It's unnecessary for me to make bargains with you," Heero replied. "I have the advantage."
"Do you?" Wu Fei smirked. "It's true that you have the weapon advantage, but I think I have the mental one."
Heero frowned. "Explain."
"I will, if you answer my question," Wu Fei replied, crossing his arms over his chest and relaxing, as if he had all the time in the world, and he wasn't facing a very dangerous Heero Yuy.
Heero stewed for a moment, but he had a curiosity as keen as his trigger finger. "Ask," he said at last, "but I may not answer."
"All right," Wu Fei replied, "Here's my question; Where's Duo?"
Heero blinked and frowned at the unexpected question. "With Zechs," Heero answered promptly. "Duo was injured and Zechs brought him here."
"Willingly?" Wu Fei asked, knowing the rumors about Zechs' eccentric behavior all too well.
"They seem on friendly terms," Heero remarked, as if that was a truth he would have liked to deny. "I have been observing them for many days now."
Wu Fei studied Heero's stony, blank face. "Did you have reason to believe otherwise?"
"Yes," Heero replied impatiently. "Zechs was our enemy. Duo was injured. Zechs brought Duo to this place in a state that wouldn't have allowed for consent."
"But you think they're friendly now?"
"Yes," Heero bit that out, hand tightening on his gun.
"You're jealous," Wu Fei dared.
Heero glared. "Your assumption is incorrect."
"Then what are you still doing here, in the bushes, now that you know that Duo is staying here willingly?" Wu Fei pointed out.
"I came to reclaim Duo," Heero replied.
"Reclaim him?" Wu Fei went sour. "Why aren't you glad to be rid of him? He was irresponsible, unable to keep a job, and unable to keep his face out of the news. He wasn't worthy of you, Heero. You should leave him where he is." Wu Fei gave their surroundings a distracted glance. "This place suits him; lazy and indolent. He'll thrive on it. Zechs will let him stay as long as he likes, as long as Duo spreads his legs for him, I'm sure."
Heero's fist was suddenly twisted into the front of Wu Fei's uniform, his face burning with fierce, hot emotion. "Duo is not having sexual relations with Zechs!"
Wu Fei tried not to panic. He kept his voice calm. "No? Is he wounded that badly? I'm sure he'll be in Zech's bed as soon as he's healed, though, don't you think? That's why you kept him in your apartment for so long, after all? It's not like he kept a job long enough to pay his half of the rent. A child of L2 either steals or whores and that's a fact."
Heero's gun came up again and Wu Fei swallowed hard. He had wanted information, but not at the price of his life. He wasn't certain why Heero was reacting so strongly to his words, but he knew he needed to know.
"Duo and I did not have a sexual relationship. I proposed the arrangement to him and he refused," Heero grated out.
Wu Fei was stunned. "You did? That doesn't seem like you, Heero. I pictured Duo taking down that long hair of his and seducing you. He's the one who needs you, after all." The rest of Heero's words penetrated and Wu Fei was startled. "He refused you? Why would he do that? He had everything to gain."
"He stated that he was not homosexual," Heero replied stiffly.
Wu Fei laughed. "That's ridiculous! Of course he is! When we were all together, I remember how he constantly tried to seduce you."
Heero grunted. "You are mistaken. We were partners. We were together only for missions. Not at any time did he make advances towards me of a sexual nature."
Wu Fei quirked a black eyebrow. "Would you have noticed? I seem to remember that you were always on your laptop and planning bombing raids, when you weren't fucking me, that is."
Wu Fei pried Heero's hand off of his uniform. It wasn't easy. He took a step back as memory washed over him, ignoring the gun still aimed at his head. He remembered a mission briefing. Wearing only a white robe with his black hair down, he had quietly sat on the bed of the safe house next to Heero, listening to his precise voice outline a plan. When Heero's voice had stopped, Wu Fei had looked up into Heero's intense blue eyes. What had happened after that was hot, hazy, and shot with memories of pain. Heero had grunted something about needing release, and being efficient about it, so that they could continue the briefing.
Wu Fei, secretly drawn to Heero and hardly believing that he had been propositioned by the young man, had barely given his consent before being pushed down onto the bed on his back. He had been strong, but Heero had been stronger. Wu Fei had gone down in thrashing limbs, but, once pinned to the bed, Heero had completed the act with dispatch, using Wu Fei's body until he orgasmed and then pumping Wu Fei's cock until Wu Fei had come as well. There had been blood, Wu Fei remembered. He had been a virgin and Heero hadn't used anything but spit and his own dripping need to ease the act.
What had followed after that had been the development of a relationship that hadn't been loving, passionate, or even friendly. It had been a relationship of a warrior with a warrior, the missions and perfecting their abilities first and foremost in both their minds. Sex had been a necessary action, as necessary as eating and sleeping, and something to be dispatched and pushed out of the way as quickly as possible. In that Wu Fei had approved, never protesting his submissive role. Heero had been the natural leader and Wu Fei had bowed to that strength.
The cold, efficient Heero Yuy, and the man's complete dedication to the war, had appealed to Wu Fei at every level. Instead of being repulsed by Heero's almost machine like personality, Wu Fei had found in him a kindred, warrior spirit, instead, an honorable, worthy partner for him. Being with Heero during the war, had been the highlight of Wu Fei's life, a time when he had felt at his very best, spiritually and physically.
After the war, when all the Gundam pilots had been at loose ends, uncertain how to lead normal lives, Heero had proceeded without a break in stride, becoming a Preventer and continuing the role of warrior that Wu Fei had found so appealing. Wu Fei had tried to join him and continue their relationship, but Heero had sensed a new, emotional attraction from him and had denied Wu Fei a place at his side. Heero hadn't wanted a relationship, only a quick fuck to keep his sexual urges from interfering with his job. He hadn't wanted Wu Fei living with him and trying to make it more than that. Wu Fei had been hurt, and surprised, that Heero had known him so little to believe that he would have done something like that. Even now, his role as a warrior, as Relena's bodyguard, was far more important than anything else in Wu Fei's life. Like Heero, he had shunned relationships to pursue perfection.
Wu Fei had missed Heero and, on several occasions, had tried to get together with the man hoping for, if nothing more, than to feel Heero's strong arms around him again and the pain/pleasure of being claimed completely by the only man he considered his equal. When he had heard that Duo had been the one to worm his way into Heero's apartment, Wu Fei had feared the worst. He could imagine the smaller ex pilot being easy prey for Heero's personality and strength. Controlling such a weak individual, to give him the release he needed, would have been ridiculously simple for a man like Heero.
To now discover that Duo had been allowed to remain with Heero, even without the reason of sex or the ability to share the expenses, was far more threatening to Wu Fei. It insinuated a deeper reason that Heero had wished to keep the ex pilot of Deathscythe with him, a reason Wu Fei didn't want to accept. Duo Maxwell was not worthy of Heero Yuy. Wu Fei didn't want to believe that Heero could fall so far from perfection as to have feelings for such a braided fool.
Wu Fei peered through the bushes. The lawn was empty. If Duo or Zechs had been there, they were gone now. He turned back to Heero and once again reached out and moved the gun aside. "I told you that you were at a disadvantage mentally with me. Come with me, have a drink, and I'll tell you why. You have the time. I doubt that Duo is going anywhere soon if Zechs is keeping him as his pet."
Heero was suspicious. Wu Fei was glad that Heero hadn't forgotten the way of the warrior even in peacetime. As he watched Heero consider his offer, he tried to see the man he had known in war time, the man who couldn't stand a puzzle unsolved or information unknown, the man who wouldn't fail in his mission of seeking perfection for anyone. He needed desperately to see that man in Heero again and to reassure himself that he still had an equal in the world.
Wu Fei couldn't help the feeling of relief when Heero suddenly grunted agreement, even when Heero added in a cold, deadly voice, "Reveal me in any way to security and I'll blow your head off before I escape."
Wu Fei smiled. "Of course. I didn't expect anything else."
*********************************************************** ***
"I'm sorry, sir, but Prince Peacecraft will be late arriving for dinner," the servant said apologetically. "He has directed me to serve dinner, if you are hungry and don't wish to wait, and to provide you with any amusement you desire."
Duo, sitting in a high backed, leather chair by the flickering fireplace of the well appointed room, sighed and opened the collar of his red dress coat. "I'll wait until he arrives, but I will need a drink and some snacks."
"We have fine, imported wines, liqueurs, brandy... anything sir wishes."
"Sir doesn't drink," Duo said with an easy smile. "I'll have some fruit juice and... I don't know, any kind of appetizer you can think of. I'm not real picky when it comes to food."
"Yes, sir. I will have it sent shortly." The servant bowed stiffly and withdrew, closing thick, double doors behind him.
"Sir COULD use a drink though," Duo muttered as he thumped his feet, in black ankle boots, up on an ottoman and surveyed the room irritably.
In a white, button down shirt with ruffled sleeves, a red coat that looked more like a uniform jacket, and black pants with a red stripe down the side of each leg, Duo had felt completely over dressed. He had wanted to protest the clothes and send for something else, something dark and more suited to Shinigami, but Gibson had brought the clothes so late, that Duo hadn't had any time to get something else.
Duo was almost certain that Gibson had been late on purpose, expecting a rebellion. Now, surrounded by a huge mansion, extremely expensive furnishings, and the prospect of having dinner in the opulent dinning room he had passed on the way, Duo was feeling glad that Gibson had been so devious. Even in the clothes he had on now, Duo was still feeling under dressed and intimidated. The intimidated part bothered Duo the most. He didn't like to feel that he wasn't good enough for the chair he was sitting in, but he had felt that way often about so much in his life.
A street kid from L2 couldn't look anywhere but up, the saying went, and Duo still felt that to be true about himself. Digging food out of garbage cans, and making his bed on the cracked concrete floors of abandoned buildings, hadn't been very good for building self esteem.
Now he was surrounded by riches, waited on hand and foot by servants, and his company was appreciated by a man, who's motives he suspected, but whom Duo respected nonetheless. It was too much like a dream, too much like everything Duo had ever dreamed of. It couldn't last, he thought, something had to sour it sooner or later. That's the way his life had been up until then. There wasn't any reason for it to change now. He would screw up eventually, Zechs would get tired of him, or Zechs would do something that Duo couldn't accept, something he would have to run away from.
That last thought was odd and Duo frowned. Run away from what? Was he really afraid that Zechs wouldn't take no for an answer? Duo had made it clear that he wasn't gay and that he didn't want Zechs to proposition him. That should be enough, he thought, he shouldn't be afraid of Zechs ignoring his wishes. Zechs was intelligent, rich, and eligible. He didn't need to pursue someone who didn't want him. There were enough willing men and women to take Duo's place. So, Duo thought, why was he still feeling nervous about the man? Why did he still feel that he needed to be prepared to defend himself and what was he thinking he needed to defend against? The gun in the holster at the back of his pants was a cold comfort to him and he didn't know why.
Duo ran a distracted hand through his bangs and sighed, "Maybe I shouldn't have stopped seeing that psychologist...."
"Sir?"
Duo started. "Gibson!" he snarled as he jerked his ribs painful to turn and look at the man. "You're going to get yourself killed if you keep sneaking up on me like that!"
Gibson didn't change expression. He didn't look afraid, only his usual blank, slightly judgmental, self. He was holding a tray with a drink and some meat rolled into baked bread and stuffed with some sort of green filling. "Sorry, sir. I brought you appetizers."
Gibson placed the tray on a table next to Duo, close enough where Duo didn't have to strain himself to reach it. "Thanks, man, but... never mind! Your funeral!" Duo snapped as he grabbed a roll and bit into it. It was warm and tasted like melted butter, garlic, and herbs. "Mmmmm," Duo said around his mouthful. "Ths' s gd!"
"Yes, sir. I'll inform the cook that you are pleased," Gibson replied stiffly. "If sir needs me, I shall be just outside. Sir has his pager?"
Duo touched the touch pad in his jacket pocket. "Right here. Thanks, Gibson. Sorry, I'm just not used to, uh, servants hovering around all the time. I guess I still don't know how to act."
"Understandable, sir. Think nothing of it." The words should have been reassuring, but Duo frowned at the tone. Gibson definitely did not approve of him. It heightened Duo's sense of insecurity. It was bad enough to have to deal with such attentive, ever present servants, but to have them not respect him was troubling to Duo. It gave him an unpleasant sense that he was still a street rat waiting for a handout from the master of the house, and that the servants were watching him in case he stole something.
Duo felt depression grip him as Gibson left the room and closed the doors behind him. Left with the rich furnishings, the fine food, and his borrowed clothes, Duo began to feel very critical of himself and unaccountably sad. His thoughts turned to Zechs again. How could he ever hope to be that man's equal? A Gundam pilot. A military officer. A wealthy man. Prince of the Saq kingdom. Brother of Relena Peacecraft, Queen of everything on Earth and in Outer Space. The man was the definition of 'accomplishment'.
Duo was only an orphan of L2, a thief who had stolen his one accomplishment in life rather than had it offered to him. He had stolen Deathscythe and stolen glory, holding it tight for only a brief amount of time and then releasing it and becoming once again, nothing, forgotten, a young man who couldn't keep his life in order or keep Heero Yuy from beating the crap out of him.
Pathetic, Duo labeled himself, and Pet, he added derisively: the novelty of a wealthy man who needed a distraction and an amusement. Duo would never believe that Zechs' interest was more than that. Street trash didn't really become friends of princes. Princes played with them and then threw them back in the garbage where they belonged.
In that large, well appointed room, nothing belonging to him, his future a blank, empty of possibilities, and pain still gnawing at his insides, Duo curled up in the chair, knees tucked in and arms wrapped around his aching middle. He cushioned his head on the soft leather arm of the chair and felt a few tears sliding down his cheeks. Really pathetic, he thought, but couldn't help himself.
********************************************************* ******
Zechs entered the study, pulling off his blue coat and tossing it over the back of a chair. He paused in the act of loosening the collar of his shirt when he noticed that Duo Maxwell was asleep in it.
A sleeping Gundam pilot was a dangerous thing, but Zechs moved closer and studied the sleeping young man. Duo looked pale, his lips tight, and there were some glistening droplets on his cheeks. Those drops caught the firelight like diamonds. Tears?
Zechs wondered briefly if Duo had been crying because Zechs had broken their dinner engagement, but then rejected that notion as self centered. They both had a darkness inside of them, a darkness made up of memories and depression; a darkness that took advantage of quiet, contemplative moments to bloom and take control. A few hours alone was more than enough time to, perhaps, trigger some unpleasant reminiscing.
"Duo," Zechs called out softly.
Duo twitched and drew his gun before his eyes were completely open. Zechs looked down the barrel, waiting with held breath until sense entered those amethyst eyes and Duo recognized him.
The young man turned irritable. "Finally!" Duo grunted. He reholstered his gun as he gingerly sat up and yawned. That yawn made his ribs catch. He hissed and held them. "I think I need a second opinion, Zechs!" he groaned. "These ribs should be healing, but they still hurt like Hell!"
Zechs backed away and went to the fireplace. He stirred it with a metal poker. Duo sleeping had seemed like a sweet innocent. Duo awake was abrasive and Zechs was too tired to want to deal with it. He gave Duo his silence and waited for the ex pilot to become completely awake and regain his civility.
"Uhm, sorry, Zechs," Duo finally said. "You look beat. I shouldn't be complaining right now."
Zechs forced himself to relax and turn to Duo with a sympathetic smile. "There's nothing wrong about being concerned for your health. You've done little enough of that in the past."
The other chairs in the room were too far away. Zechs picked one up and moved it closer. Sitting on the edge, he faced Duo. "I've done some field medicine. Unbutton your coat and shirt and I'll look at your ribs. The way you've refused to lie still in bed, I wouldn't be surprised it you've managed to strain the breaks out of position."
Duo scowled. "I've been very careful, Nurse Zechs," he snapped back. "You're servants have done everything short of wipe my ass. I think they would do that too if I gave the order."
Zechs gave Duo a level look. Duo looked down uncomfortably as Zechs said, "I know how intrusive servants can be, but in my position they are necessary. You are more fortunate. Once you're better, and able to do things for yourself, you can dispose of them."
Duo wiped at his face, suddenly remembering that he had fallen asleep crying. He could feel a wetness there and hoped that Zechs hadn't noticed it. "Being alone isn't so hot either sometimes," Duo replied, "but I think I'll be glad not to have old Gibson tagging along on my heels."
Zechs reached out and began unbuttoning Duo's red coat. The color suited the ex pilot. It was a warm contrast to his chestnut hair. "Are you having trouble with Gibson? I can have him replaced."
"Wouldn't matter,"' Duo replied with unconcealed bitterness as he watched Zechs' long fingers work the buttons of his coat, wondering why he wasn't trying to stop him. Zechs' attitude was so matter- of- fact though, a man doing another man a favor with nothing intimate implied, that Duo felt comfortable not protesting. He had been worrying about his ribs. He did want it confirmed that they were healing well. Liar, a voice deep down said, but Duo ignored it and buried it deeper.
"Why wouldn't changing servants matter?" Zechs wondered as he opened Duo's coat and then began to unbutton the white shirt underneath. The material was thinner, Zechs' fingers much more noticeable. He bent a little and Duo found himself looking down onto the top of the man's white hair and down along the back of his white dress shirt. Zechs' shoulders filled it out nicely. Duo found himself very interested in that fact and the way Zechs' neck made a strong line down into his open collar. He felt a distinct urge to touch the man's skin, to see if it felt as good as it looked.
"Why wouldn't changing servants matter?" Zechs repeated and looked up at Duo with his clear, blue eyes.
"They think I'm servant material, not master material, I'm sure," Duo managed to reply, swallowing hard and confused by his reaction to Zechs. Was he so desperate to get laid that even another man looked appealing? Duo wondered. Is this the way that Heero had felt towards him? Duo pushed that thought violently from his mind. He didn't want to think about Heero just then. He didn't want to remember the man's rough hands separating his ass and the helpless fear he had felt. Zechs wasn't Heero. This wasn't a rape, he told himself firmly. Zechs only wanted to help him.
"I think you are needlessly concerned about their opinion of you," Zechs said at last, "and being in pain, and irritated by your dependency on them, you may be misinterpreting how they regard you."
"Yeah, I guess, " Duo replied noncommittally, not really wanting to talk about that subject."
Duo held himself still as Zechs finished opening his shirt and reached to pull down the cloth brace around his ribs. It hurt like fire. Duo bit his lip hard, not wanting to end up crying like a girl. As Zechs' firm fingers checked the broken ribs, Duo felt a distinct lack of reluctance on his part. Heero's touch had been repulsive and unwanted. For some reason that Duo didn't understand, Zechs' touch wasn't either of those things.
"They are still healing well," Zechs said at last and pulled up the brace. He methodically began buttoning Duo's shirt again.
Duo clamped down hard on a feeling of disappointment. It was almost as if he had wanted Zechs to keep touching him, to maybe go further than touch. It shocked Duo. He retreated into his patented attitude as he purposefully pushed Zechs' hands off . "I can button my own shirt, Mom."
Zechs nodded with a tight smile and sat back in his chair. He found himself gripping the chair arms hard and wishing he had the concealment of his coat. It had taken all of his strength not to crush his face against Duo's breast and suckle his incomparable, luscious pink nipples, and all of his willpower not to run hands down into Duo's pants, bring out that young man's, sweet cock, the one he had touched, but not yet tasted, and ravished him completely.
Zechs calmed himself with an effort, knowing his pale skin was flushed red. He thought about his meeting with Relena's representatives, the insulting questions about his loyalty thinly veiled in civility, the paperwork and the schedule of boring meetings and functions they had all but ordered him to attend. It had the desired effect. Zechs felt his pulse slow and bitterness take away the sting of passion. When he looked at Duo again, he was calm and controlled and Duo looked oblivious to his troubled mind.
"Thanks," Duo said as he finished his buttons. "Did you get to eat?"
"No," Zechs replied, feeling hungry for something other than food.
"I had a snack," Duo said. "I decided to wait for dinner until you came. I didn't realize it would take you so long."
"I didn't expect you to be waiting for me when I returned," Zechs replied. He pushed his pale hair back behind his shoulders and then sank back into his chair, trying to relax, trying not to think about how much of an advantage he had over the weaker Duo Maxwell. That was the soldier in him, Zechs realized, and the darkness.
"I didn't have anything else to do," Duo admitted and felt as if he had just laid the complete summation of himself at Zechs' feet. He didn't have anything, he didn't have work, and he didn't have any where else to go. A waste of space, Duo thought bitterly, but tried to hide that bitterness by raising his old, happy go lucky mask. "I didn't want to miss some great food," Duo added in a humorous tone, "or a chance to get out of that bungalow."
Zechs looked at the two empty trays on the table beside Duo. "Are you still hungry?"
"Always," Duo smirked. "Am I going to get to see that fancy dinning room after all?"
"No," Zechs replied and watched Duo have a moment of uncertainty before he added, "I'll have it brought here."
Duo brightened and Zechs thought, I'm not reading him wrong. He's interested in me. Zechs had seduced many men and women. He was aware of his own good looks and he knew how to use it to his advantage. The darkness in him demanded that he use it, demanded that he cast aside Duo's objections and take what he wanted from the young man. A virgin, that voice said to Zechs, a tight, sweet, innocent virgin. To let loose that flow of chestnut hair and to lift those legs to claim the place between them... It was as simple as reaching out, taking hold of the smaller man, and giving him the pleasure Zechs could masterfully impart.
Duo watched as conflict flickered over Zechs' face. He almost said something, almost reassured himself by putting a hand on his gun. He didn't like the way Zechs' eyes were riveted on him. It looked too much like a cat deciding whether it should devour a mouse or not, too much like the way Heero had looked at him.
"Uh, maybe we should just forget it," Duo said and faked a yawn. "It feels late and I'm sure you'd rather be left alone to rest after dealing with Relena-"
Zechs's muscles had tightened, getting ready to grab Duo. That kittenish yawn, that opening of Duo's mouth, and the memory of slipping himself into that moist warmth between his lips had stripped away all of Zechs' self control. The mention of Relena had brought it back with a vengeance, as if Duo's words had been a bucket of ice water emptied on his head.
Zechs floundered and then recovered. Duo was once again, a young man sitting before him, a potential friend who was eying him suspiciously and with confusion. Duo wasn't an aristocratic whore he had picked up at a party. If he hoped for something more than sex from Duo Maxwell, Zechs thought, then he had to control that part of himself that wanted instant gratification and to escape the darkness at any cost, even if that cost was ... Zechs reined his thoughts in, surprised at himself. What was he thinking? Did he want a relationship with Duo? Was he finally going to admit it to himself?
"Uh, Zechs?" Duo prompted. He started to get up, a hand pressed to his side. "I'll get Gibson and leave you to your thoughts. It must not have been a good meeting. Sorry to bring it up."
"Wait," Zechs said quickly, coming back to himself. "You don't have to go, Duo." He recovered with an effort, pulling his pager out of his pocket and summoning a servant. When Gibson appeared, Zechs ordered, "Dinner for two. Bring it here."
"Yes, sir," Gibson replied properly and Duo sourly saw the deference he gave Zechs, the deference that had been lacking in his dealings with Duo.
When Gibson had left, Zechs settled back in his chair and motioned Duo to do the same. "Now, tell me how you knew my meeting had been with representatives of Relena."
Duo found a grin, though he was still wary of Zechs changing moods. "Well, servants gossip and one mentioned to another that they had seen Wu Fei." Duo faked a feminine voice. "Oh, how handsome!" He chuckled and Zechs smiled. "I know Wu Fei works for Relena, so I just assumed he had escorted her la dee da person here or at least some of her hanger ons. When you were late, I put two and two together. I'm a genius, right?"
"La dee da person?" Zechs laughed and he felt himself relaxing. Duo looked so young and mischievous just then, he couldn't help but be amused. The lust and passion were still there underneath the surface, but Zechs felt the darkness receding, put to flight by an ex pilot's good humor and his own fearful realization that his relationship with Duo had changed.
"Yes, I did have a meeting with Relena's representatives," Zechs admitted, "and no, it didn't go well. Your powers of deduction are amazing," he joked and Duo laughed. It was beautiful, that laugh, Zechs thought, and infectious. He didn't want to ruin the sudden good humor by continuing a conversation that wasn't pleasant. He wanted to hear Duo's laughter some more.
Zechs rose from his chair and took an embroidered blanket from the back of the leather couch nearby. He spread it out before the fire. It was deep brown and crimson red, an embroidery of renaissance designs done in gold. The thing was an antique and worth a small fortune in the gold needlework alone. Zechs threw the couch pillows on top of it and then turned to Duo.
"Do you think this will be comfortable for you?" Zechs asked. "There isn't a table wide enough in here for the meal I had prepared for you."
"A late night picnic?" Duo wondered with an even wider grin. "I didn't know you could be so spontaneous, Zechs. I guess I was dreading the dinning room anyway," he admitted. "I never had much of a chance to eat at a table when I was growing up, or as a Gundam pilot. The floor is much more what I'm used to."
Zechs noted a tinge of self recrimination in Duo's tone. "My table has usually been my lap on campaigns and in makeshift barracks," Zechs replied. "The dinning room intimidates me as well."
Zechs was rewarded by a look of gratitude. He felt a warmth inside at that acknowledgement of kindness. Zechs realized then that it had been far too long since he had dropped his guard and not used every word that came out of his mouth to fence with some aristocrat or ambassador.
"Do you need help?" Zechs wondered solicitously.
"I'm not an invalid!" Duo snapped without real anger. "I can get around... just slowly."
"Of course," Zechs replied and backed away.
It was slow, the way Duo eased himself out of the chair and onto the floor, but he did accomplish it without too many groans and gasps of pain. Settling against a pillow, he closed his eyes for a moment and then opened them as he smiled at Zechs. "Mission accomplished."
Zechs settled close by, putting a pillow in his lap to rest on, but also to hide any visible sign that Duo was exciting him again. The young man's flushed face, his bright eyes, and the creamy line of his neck plunging into his dress shirt collar as he reclined back on his pillow, was unintentionally provocative.
They talked then, about the war, about their lives, about the food when it came. Duo laughed, joked, and admitted to his confusion about how to lead his life. Zechs said things he had never said to anyone, his fear before a battle, his grief at so many lives lost, the agony of going mad because of the Zero system. Duo had listened intently, drinking in every word Zechs uttered and, in the end, offering some forgiveness; forgiveness Zechs didn't think he deserved.
"You did go mad," Duo said softly, "and it caused you to attack and kill people. I had a taste of the Zero system too. I know how it feels and what it can make a man do. I hated you, you know, but.... I can understand how it could happen, how your mind was twisted. I-I don't hate you anymore, Zechs."
Zechs had felt his heart clench at those words. So many people hated him and wanted him dead for what he had done. That the one man who mattered most to him was willing to forget that hate.... Mattered most. Zechs turned those two words over and over in his head, trying one last time to escape the truth. It was futile. His heart had fallen, stolen by an impish young man with an impossibly long braid.
They were very close. Duo's skin was glowing and warm from the fire of the fireplace. He was smiling softly at Zechs, his body stretched out against pillows next to the food, a glass of some juice in one hand. Zechs lost his willpower all in an instant. He leaned forward very slowly, very hesitantly, and then kissed Duo's silken lips.
It was brief, that kiss, but the shock of it seemed to jolt the both of them as something passed between them, an undefinable soul meeting soul joining that was more intense than anything either of them had ever felt before.
Duo shivered, closed his eyes, and breathed in Zechs' unique spicy scent as his lips tasted Zechs lips and found them sweet and compelling. It was only a moment, a moment of total surrender, and then the moment was past and Duo was staring at a man who was kissing him, an ex enemy, an unknown personality with unknown objectives, but first and foremost, a man!
Duo recoiled, turning flaming red in embarrassment. "Shit, Zechs!" Duo exclaimed. "You said you wouldn't do that! I told you, I'm not gay! Why did you have to ruin everything?"
Zechs went cold and furious as he leapt to his feet, fists clenched. He had never been so humiliated and rejected in his life! Duo had responded! He had kissed him back! The damn tease! The damn, L2 street rat! It was a moment before Zechs registered Duo's shocked, red face, and realized that he had said those words out loud.
"Fuck you!" Duo exploded. "I didn't ask for that!" He surged to his feet, crying out at the pain, clutching his ribs, but ignoring it all as he turned on his training and pumped his blood full of adrenalin. "Guess now I know what you really think of me," He said through gritted teeth. "Guess I always knew, deep down."
Duo staggered to the door as Zechs watched him, still furious, but beginning to feel a coldness over take him, the coldness of loss. He was losing Duo. He had said things that could never be taken back or forgiven. A voice screamed for him to try, to say something before Duo went through that door. The darkness was stronger. It whispered to Zechs that it was what he deserved, playing with street trash, imagining that he could love or be loved by even someone like that.
Duo threw open the doors of the study. "Gibson!" Duo shouted between pants of pain. "I'm getting out of here!" He threw over his shoulder back at Zechs. "Nice party, Zechs, but I think I'll stick with the other rats from now on."
Duo was gone then and Zechs was left staring at an empty doorway. With a cry of fury and self loathing, Zechs turned and rammed a fist into the wall.
************************************************************
TBC
Disclaimer: I don't own them and I don't make any money off of this.
Warnings: Guys talking about having sex with guys. Language. Violence. Graphic. Wu Fei the masochist and maybe not so much of a jerk.
The Lost Soldier Series
Sequel to A Hundred Strokes#9
I
Building Bridges#10
"Heero," Wu Fei said calmly, staring at the barrel of the silencer. "Would you like to tell me what you think you're doing? You do remember that the war is over, don't you?"
"Tell that to Zechs," Heero replied stonily.
"Zechs isn't my friend," Wu Fei said, "and I'm not your enemy. I'm working for Relena now as her Head of Security, but you know that. I've sent you enough messages, messages you didn't answer."
"No point," Heero replied.
Wu Fei frowned sharply. "No point?" he echoed angrily.
Heero's head jerked impatiently. "This conversation is at an end. Try to stop me, or call for security, and I will kill you."
"You won't kill me," Wu Fei replied arrogantly. "It's against your training to kill non combatants."
Wu Fei dared to slowly reach up and carefully push the gun barrel away from his forehead. Sweat trickled down his sides, but he wasn't a coward. He wasn't sure that his words to Heero were true, but if Heero did try to kill him, Wu Fei intended to die in action, not cowering and begging for his life.
"Answer one question and then I'll pretend that I never saw you," Wu Fei bargained. "It's no business of mine if you want to make trouble for Milliardo Peacecraft."
"It's unnecessary for me to make bargains with you," Heero replied. "I have the advantage."
"Do you?" Wu Fei smirked. "It's true that you have the weapon advantage, but I think I have the mental one."
Heero frowned. "Explain."
"I will, if you answer my question," Wu Fei replied, crossing his arms over his chest and relaxing, as if he had all the time in the world, and he wasn't facing a very dangerous Heero Yuy.
Heero stewed for a moment, but he had a curiosity as keen as his trigger finger. "Ask," he said at last, "but I may not answer."
"All right," Wu Fei replied, "Here's my question; Where's Duo?"
Heero blinked and frowned at the unexpected question. "With Zechs," Heero answered promptly. "Duo was injured and Zechs brought him here."
"Willingly?" Wu Fei asked, knowing the rumors about Zechs' eccentric behavior all too well.
"They seem on friendly terms," Heero remarked, as if that was a truth he would have liked to deny. "I have been observing them for many days now."
Wu Fei studied Heero's stony, blank face. "Did you have reason to believe otherwise?"
"Yes," Heero replied impatiently. "Zechs was our enemy. Duo was injured. Zechs brought Duo to this place in a state that wouldn't have allowed for consent."
"But you think they're friendly now?"
"Yes," Heero bit that out, hand tightening on his gun.
"You're jealous," Wu Fei dared.
Heero glared. "Your assumption is incorrect."
"Then what are you still doing here, in the bushes, now that you know that Duo is staying here willingly?" Wu Fei pointed out.
"I came to reclaim Duo," Heero replied.
"Reclaim him?" Wu Fei went sour. "Why aren't you glad to be rid of him? He was irresponsible, unable to keep a job, and unable to keep his face out of the news. He wasn't worthy of you, Heero. You should leave him where he is." Wu Fei gave their surroundings a distracted glance. "This place suits him; lazy and indolent. He'll thrive on it. Zechs will let him stay as long as he likes, as long as Duo spreads his legs for him, I'm sure."
Heero's fist was suddenly twisted into the front of Wu Fei's uniform, his face burning with fierce, hot emotion. "Duo is not having sexual relations with Zechs!"
Wu Fei tried not to panic. He kept his voice calm. "No? Is he wounded that badly? I'm sure he'll be in Zech's bed as soon as he's healed, though, don't you think? That's why you kept him in your apartment for so long, after all? It's not like he kept a job long enough to pay his half of the rent. A child of L2 either steals or whores and that's a fact."
Heero's gun came up again and Wu Fei swallowed hard. He had wanted information, but not at the price of his life. He wasn't certain why Heero was reacting so strongly to his words, but he knew he needed to know.
"Duo and I did not have a sexual relationship. I proposed the arrangement to him and he refused," Heero grated out.
Wu Fei was stunned. "You did? That doesn't seem like you, Heero. I pictured Duo taking down that long hair of his and seducing you. He's the one who needs you, after all." The rest of Heero's words penetrated and Wu Fei was startled. "He refused you? Why would he do that? He had everything to gain."
"He stated that he was not homosexual," Heero replied stiffly.
Wu Fei laughed. "That's ridiculous! Of course he is! When we were all together, I remember how he constantly tried to seduce you."
Heero grunted. "You are mistaken. We were partners. We were together only for missions. Not at any time did he make advances towards me of a sexual nature."
Wu Fei quirked a black eyebrow. "Would you have noticed? I seem to remember that you were always on your laptop and planning bombing raids, when you weren't fucking me, that is."
Wu Fei pried Heero's hand off of his uniform. It wasn't easy. He took a step back as memory washed over him, ignoring the gun still aimed at his head. He remembered a mission briefing. Wearing only a white robe with his black hair down, he had quietly sat on the bed of the safe house next to Heero, listening to his precise voice outline a plan. When Heero's voice had stopped, Wu Fei had looked up into Heero's intense blue eyes. What had happened after that was hot, hazy, and shot with memories of pain. Heero had grunted something about needing release, and being efficient about it, so that they could continue the briefing.
Wu Fei, secretly drawn to Heero and hardly believing that he had been propositioned by the young man, had barely given his consent before being pushed down onto the bed on his back. He had been strong, but Heero had been stronger. Wu Fei had gone down in thrashing limbs, but, once pinned to the bed, Heero had completed the act with dispatch, using Wu Fei's body until he orgasmed and then pumping Wu Fei's cock until Wu Fei had come as well. There had been blood, Wu Fei remembered. He had been a virgin and Heero hadn't used anything but spit and his own dripping need to ease the act.
What had followed after that had been the development of a relationship that hadn't been loving, passionate, or even friendly. It had been a relationship of a warrior with a warrior, the missions and perfecting their abilities first and foremost in both their minds. Sex had been a necessary action, as necessary as eating and sleeping, and something to be dispatched and pushed out of the way as quickly as possible. In that Wu Fei had approved, never protesting his submissive role. Heero had been the natural leader and Wu Fei had bowed to that strength.
The cold, efficient Heero Yuy, and the man's complete dedication to the war, had appealed to Wu Fei at every level. Instead of being repulsed by Heero's almost machine like personality, Wu Fei had found in him a kindred, warrior spirit, instead, an honorable, worthy partner for him. Being with Heero during the war, had been the highlight of Wu Fei's life, a time when he had felt at his very best, spiritually and physically.
After the war, when all the Gundam pilots had been at loose ends, uncertain how to lead normal lives, Heero had proceeded without a break in stride, becoming a Preventer and continuing the role of warrior that Wu Fei had found so appealing. Wu Fei had tried to join him and continue their relationship, but Heero had sensed a new, emotional attraction from him and had denied Wu Fei a place at his side. Heero hadn't wanted a relationship, only a quick fuck to keep his sexual urges from interfering with his job. He hadn't wanted Wu Fei living with him and trying to make it more than that. Wu Fei had been hurt, and surprised, that Heero had known him so little to believe that he would have done something like that. Even now, his role as a warrior, as Relena's bodyguard, was far more important than anything else in Wu Fei's life. Like Heero, he had shunned relationships to pursue perfection.
Wu Fei had missed Heero and, on several occasions, had tried to get together with the man hoping for, if nothing more, than to feel Heero's strong arms around him again and the pain/pleasure of being claimed completely by the only man he considered his equal. When he had heard that Duo had been the one to worm his way into Heero's apartment, Wu Fei had feared the worst. He could imagine the smaller ex pilot being easy prey for Heero's personality and strength. Controlling such a weak individual, to give him the release he needed, would have been ridiculously simple for a man like Heero.
To now discover that Duo had been allowed to remain with Heero, even without the reason of sex or the ability to share the expenses, was far more threatening to Wu Fei. It insinuated a deeper reason that Heero had wished to keep the ex pilot of Deathscythe with him, a reason Wu Fei didn't want to accept. Duo Maxwell was not worthy of Heero Yuy. Wu Fei didn't want to believe that Heero could fall so far from perfection as to have feelings for such a braided fool.
Wu Fei peered through the bushes. The lawn was empty. If Duo or Zechs had been there, they were gone now. He turned back to Heero and once again reached out and moved the gun aside. "I told you that you were at a disadvantage mentally with me. Come with me, have a drink, and I'll tell you why. You have the time. I doubt that Duo is going anywhere soon if Zechs is keeping him as his pet."
Heero was suspicious. Wu Fei was glad that Heero hadn't forgotten the way of the warrior even in peacetime. As he watched Heero consider his offer, he tried to see the man he had known in war time, the man who couldn't stand a puzzle unsolved or information unknown, the man who wouldn't fail in his mission of seeking perfection for anyone. He needed desperately to see that man in Heero again and to reassure himself that he still had an equal in the world.
Wu Fei couldn't help the feeling of relief when Heero suddenly grunted agreement, even when Heero added in a cold, deadly voice, "Reveal me in any way to security and I'll blow your head off before I escape."
Wu Fei smiled. "Of course. I didn't expect anything else."
*********************************************************** ***
"I'm sorry, sir, but Prince Peacecraft will be late arriving for dinner," the servant said apologetically. "He has directed me to serve dinner, if you are hungry and don't wish to wait, and to provide you with any amusement you desire."
Duo, sitting in a high backed, leather chair by the flickering fireplace of the well appointed room, sighed and opened the collar of his red dress coat. "I'll wait until he arrives, but I will need a drink and some snacks."
"We have fine, imported wines, liqueurs, brandy... anything sir wishes."
"Sir doesn't drink," Duo said with an easy smile. "I'll have some fruit juice and... I don't know, any kind of appetizer you can think of. I'm not real picky when it comes to food."
"Yes, sir. I will have it sent shortly." The servant bowed stiffly and withdrew, closing thick, double doors behind him.
"Sir COULD use a drink though," Duo muttered as he thumped his feet, in black ankle boots, up on an ottoman and surveyed the room irritably.
In a white, button down shirt with ruffled sleeves, a red coat that looked more like a uniform jacket, and black pants with a red stripe down the side of each leg, Duo had felt completely over dressed. He had wanted to protest the clothes and send for something else, something dark and more suited to Shinigami, but Gibson had brought the clothes so late, that Duo hadn't had any time to get something else.
Duo was almost certain that Gibson had been late on purpose, expecting a rebellion. Now, surrounded by a huge mansion, extremely expensive furnishings, and the prospect of having dinner in the opulent dinning room he had passed on the way, Duo was feeling glad that Gibson had been so devious. Even in the clothes he had on now, Duo was still feeling under dressed and intimidated. The intimidated part bothered Duo the most. He didn't like to feel that he wasn't good enough for the chair he was sitting in, but he had felt that way often about so much in his life.
A street kid from L2 couldn't look anywhere but up, the saying went, and Duo still felt that to be true about himself. Digging food out of garbage cans, and making his bed on the cracked concrete floors of abandoned buildings, hadn't been very good for building self esteem.
Now he was surrounded by riches, waited on hand and foot by servants, and his company was appreciated by a man, who's motives he suspected, but whom Duo respected nonetheless. It was too much like a dream, too much like everything Duo had ever dreamed of. It couldn't last, he thought, something had to sour it sooner or later. That's the way his life had been up until then. There wasn't any reason for it to change now. He would screw up eventually, Zechs would get tired of him, or Zechs would do something that Duo couldn't accept, something he would have to run away from.
That last thought was odd and Duo frowned. Run away from what? Was he really afraid that Zechs wouldn't take no for an answer? Duo had made it clear that he wasn't gay and that he didn't want Zechs to proposition him. That should be enough, he thought, he shouldn't be afraid of Zechs ignoring his wishes. Zechs was intelligent, rich, and eligible. He didn't need to pursue someone who didn't want him. There were enough willing men and women to take Duo's place. So, Duo thought, why was he still feeling nervous about the man? Why did he still feel that he needed to be prepared to defend himself and what was he thinking he needed to defend against? The gun in the holster at the back of his pants was a cold comfort to him and he didn't know why.
Duo ran a distracted hand through his bangs and sighed, "Maybe I shouldn't have stopped seeing that psychologist...."
"Sir?"
Duo started. "Gibson!" he snarled as he jerked his ribs painful to turn and look at the man. "You're going to get yourself killed if you keep sneaking up on me like that!"
Gibson didn't change expression. He didn't look afraid, only his usual blank, slightly judgmental, self. He was holding a tray with a drink and some meat rolled into baked bread and stuffed with some sort of green filling. "Sorry, sir. I brought you appetizers."
Gibson placed the tray on a table next to Duo, close enough where Duo didn't have to strain himself to reach it. "Thanks, man, but... never mind! Your funeral!" Duo snapped as he grabbed a roll and bit into it. It was warm and tasted like melted butter, garlic, and herbs. "Mmmmm," Duo said around his mouthful. "Ths' s gd!"
"Yes, sir. I'll inform the cook that you are pleased," Gibson replied stiffly. "If sir needs me, I shall be just outside. Sir has his pager?"
Duo touched the touch pad in his jacket pocket. "Right here. Thanks, Gibson. Sorry, I'm just not used to, uh, servants hovering around all the time. I guess I still don't know how to act."
"Understandable, sir. Think nothing of it." The words should have been reassuring, but Duo frowned at the tone. Gibson definitely did not approve of him. It heightened Duo's sense of insecurity. It was bad enough to have to deal with such attentive, ever present servants, but to have them not respect him was troubling to Duo. It gave him an unpleasant sense that he was still a street rat waiting for a handout from the master of the house, and that the servants were watching him in case he stole something.
Duo felt depression grip him as Gibson left the room and closed the doors behind him. Left with the rich furnishings, the fine food, and his borrowed clothes, Duo began to feel very critical of himself and unaccountably sad. His thoughts turned to Zechs again. How could he ever hope to be that man's equal? A Gundam pilot. A military officer. A wealthy man. Prince of the Saq kingdom. Brother of Relena Peacecraft, Queen of everything on Earth and in Outer Space. The man was the definition of 'accomplishment'.
Duo was only an orphan of L2, a thief who had stolen his one accomplishment in life rather than had it offered to him. He had stolen Deathscythe and stolen glory, holding it tight for only a brief amount of time and then releasing it and becoming once again, nothing, forgotten, a young man who couldn't keep his life in order or keep Heero Yuy from beating the crap out of him.
Pathetic, Duo labeled himself, and Pet, he added derisively: the novelty of a wealthy man who needed a distraction and an amusement. Duo would never believe that Zechs' interest was more than that. Street trash didn't really become friends of princes. Princes played with them and then threw them back in the garbage where they belonged.
In that large, well appointed room, nothing belonging to him, his future a blank, empty of possibilities, and pain still gnawing at his insides, Duo curled up in the chair, knees tucked in and arms wrapped around his aching middle. He cushioned his head on the soft leather arm of the chair and felt a few tears sliding down his cheeks. Really pathetic, he thought, but couldn't help himself.
********************************************************* ******
Zechs entered the study, pulling off his blue coat and tossing it over the back of a chair. He paused in the act of loosening the collar of his shirt when he noticed that Duo Maxwell was asleep in it.
A sleeping Gundam pilot was a dangerous thing, but Zechs moved closer and studied the sleeping young man. Duo looked pale, his lips tight, and there were some glistening droplets on his cheeks. Those drops caught the firelight like diamonds. Tears?
Zechs wondered briefly if Duo had been crying because Zechs had broken their dinner engagement, but then rejected that notion as self centered. They both had a darkness inside of them, a darkness made up of memories and depression; a darkness that took advantage of quiet, contemplative moments to bloom and take control. A few hours alone was more than enough time to, perhaps, trigger some unpleasant reminiscing.
"Duo," Zechs called out softly.
Duo twitched and drew his gun before his eyes were completely open. Zechs looked down the barrel, waiting with held breath until sense entered those amethyst eyes and Duo recognized him.
The young man turned irritable. "Finally!" Duo grunted. He reholstered his gun as he gingerly sat up and yawned. That yawn made his ribs catch. He hissed and held them. "I think I need a second opinion, Zechs!" he groaned. "These ribs should be healing, but they still hurt like Hell!"
Zechs backed away and went to the fireplace. He stirred it with a metal poker. Duo sleeping had seemed like a sweet innocent. Duo awake was abrasive and Zechs was too tired to want to deal with it. He gave Duo his silence and waited for the ex pilot to become completely awake and regain his civility.
"Uhm, sorry, Zechs," Duo finally said. "You look beat. I shouldn't be complaining right now."
Zechs forced himself to relax and turn to Duo with a sympathetic smile. "There's nothing wrong about being concerned for your health. You've done little enough of that in the past."
The other chairs in the room were too far away. Zechs picked one up and moved it closer. Sitting on the edge, he faced Duo. "I've done some field medicine. Unbutton your coat and shirt and I'll look at your ribs. The way you've refused to lie still in bed, I wouldn't be surprised it you've managed to strain the breaks out of position."
Duo scowled. "I've been very careful, Nurse Zechs," he snapped back. "You're servants have done everything short of wipe my ass. I think they would do that too if I gave the order."
Zechs gave Duo a level look. Duo looked down uncomfortably as Zechs said, "I know how intrusive servants can be, but in my position they are necessary. You are more fortunate. Once you're better, and able to do things for yourself, you can dispose of them."
Duo wiped at his face, suddenly remembering that he had fallen asleep crying. He could feel a wetness there and hoped that Zechs hadn't noticed it. "Being alone isn't so hot either sometimes," Duo replied, "but I think I'll be glad not to have old Gibson tagging along on my heels."
Zechs reached out and began unbuttoning Duo's red coat. The color suited the ex pilot. It was a warm contrast to his chestnut hair. "Are you having trouble with Gibson? I can have him replaced."
"Wouldn't matter,"' Duo replied with unconcealed bitterness as he watched Zechs' long fingers work the buttons of his coat, wondering why he wasn't trying to stop him. Zechs' attitude was so matter- of- fact though, a man doing another man a favor with nothing intimate implied, that Duo felt comfortable not protesting. He had been worrying about his ribs. He did want it confirmed that they were healing well. Liar, a voice deep down said, but Duo ignored it and buried it deeper.
"Why wouldn't changing servants matter?" Zechs wondered as he opened Duo's coat and then began to unbutton the white shirt underneath. The material was thinner, Zechs' fingers much more noticeable. He bent a little and Duo found himself looking down onto the top of the man's white hair and down along the back of his white dress shirt. Zechs' shoulders filled it out nicely. Duo found himself very interested in that fact and the way Zechs' neck made a strong line down into his open collar. He felt a distinct urge to touch the man's skin, to see if it felt as good as it looked.
"Why wouldn't changing servants matter?" Zechs repeated and looked up at Duo with his clear, blue eyes.
"They think I'm servant material, not master material, I'm sure," Duo managed to reply, swallowing hard and confused by his reaction to Zechs. Was he so desperate to get laid that even another man looked appealing? Duo wondered. Is this the way that Heero had felt towards him? Duo pushed that thought violently from his mind. He didn't want to think about Heero just then. He didn't want to remember the man's rough hands separating his ass and the helpless fear he had felt. Zechs wasn't Heero. This wasn't a rape, he told himself firmly. Zechs only wanted to help him.
"I think you are needlessly concerned about their opinion of you," Zechs said at last, "and being in pain, and irritated by your dependency on them, you may be misinterpreting how they regard you."
"Yeah, I guess, " Duo replied noncommittally, not really wanting to talk about that subject."
Duo held himself still as Zechs finished opening his shirt and reached to pull down the cloth brace around his ribs. It hurt like fire. Duo bit his lip hard, not wanting to end up crying like a girl. As Zechs' firm fingers checked the broken ribs, Duo felt a distinct lack of reluctance on his part. Heero's touch had been repulsive and unwanted. For some reason that Duo didn't understand, Zechs' touch wasn't either of those things.
"They are still healing well," Zechs said at last and pulled up the brace. He methodically began buttoning Duo's shirt again.
Duo clamped down hard on a feeling of disappointment. It was almost as if he had wanted Zechs to keep touching him, to maybe go further than touch. It shocked Duo. He retreated into his patented attitude as he purposefully pushed Zechs' hands off . "I can button my own shirt, Mom."
Zechs nodded with a tight smile and sat back in his chair. He found himself gripping the chair arms hard and wishing he had the concealment of his coat. It had taken all of his strength not to crush his face against Duo's breast and suckle his incomparable, luscious pink nipples, and all of his willpower not to run hands down into Duo's pants, bring out that young man's, sweet cock, the one he had touched, but not yet tasted, and ravished him completely.
Zechs calmed himself with an effort, knowing his pale skin was flushed red. He thought about his meeting with Relena's representatives, the insulting questions about his loyalty thinly veiled in civility, the paperwork and the schedule of boring meetings and functions they had all but ordered him to attend. It had the desired effect. Zechs felt his pulse slow and bitterness take away the sting of passion. When he looked at Duo again, he was calm and controlled and Duo looked oblivious to his troubled mind.
"Thanks," Duo said as he finished his buttons. "Did you get to eat?"
"No," Zechs replied, feeling hungry for something other than food.
"I had a snack," Duo said. "I decided to wait for dinner until you came. I didn't realize it would take you so long."
"I didn't expect you to be waiting for me when I returned," Zechs replied. He pushed his pale hair back behind his shoulders and then sank back into his chair, trying to relax, trying not to think about how much of an advantage he had over the weaker Duo Maxwell. That was the soldier in him, Zechs realized, and the darkness.
"I didn't have anything else to do," Duo admitted and felt as if he had just laid the complete summation of himself at Zechs' feet. He didn't have anything, he didn't have work, and he didn't have any where else to go. A waste of space, Duo thought bitterly, but tried to hide that bitterness by raising his old, happy go lucky mask. "I didn't want to miss some great food," Duo added in a humorous tone, "or a chance to get out of that bungalow."
Zechs looked at the two empty trays on the table beside Duo. "Are you still hungry?"
"Always," Duo smirked. "Am I going to get to see that fancy dinning room after all?"
"No," Zechs replied and watched Duo have a moment of uncertainty before he added, "I'll have it brought here."
Duo brightened and Zechs thought, I'm not reading him wrong. He's interested in me. Zechs had seduced many men and women. He was aware of his own good looks and he knew how to use it to his advantage. The darkness in him demanded that he use it, demanded that he cast aside Duo's objections and take what he wanted from the young man. A virgin, that voice said to Zechs, a tight, sweet, innocent virgin. To let loose that flow of chestnut hair and to lift those legs to claim the place between them... It was as simple as reaching out, taking hold of the smaller man, and giving him the pleasure Zechs could masterfully impart.
Duo watched as conflict flickered over Zechs' face. He almost said something, almost reassured himself by putting a hand on his gun. He didn't like the way Zechs' eyes were riveted on him. It looked too much like a cat deciding whether it should devour a mouse or not, too much like the way Heero had looked at him.
"Uh, maybe we should just forget it," Duo said and faked a yawn. "It feels late and I'm sure you'd rather be left alone to rest after dealing with Relena-"
Zechs's muscles had tightened, getting ready to grab Duo. That kittenish yawn, that opening of Duo's mouth, and the memory of slipping himself into that moist warmth between his lips had stripped away all of Zechs' self control. The mention of Relena had brought it back with a vengeance, as if Duo's words had been a bucket of ice water emptied on his head.
Zechs floundered and then recovered. Duo was once again, a young man sitting before him, a potential friend who was eying him suspiciously and with confusion. Duo wasn't an aristocratic whore he had picked up at a party. If he hoped for something more than sex from Duo Maxwell, Zechs thought, then he had to control that part of himself that wanted instant gratification and to escape the darkness at any cost, even if that cost was ... Zechs reined his thoughts in, surprised at himself. What was he thinking? Did he want a relationship with Duo? Was he finally going to admit it to himself?
"Uh, Zechs?" Duo prompted. He started to get up, a hand pressed to his side. "I'll get Gibson and leave you to your thoughts. It must not have been a good meeting. Sorry to bring it up."
"Wait," Zechs said quickly, coming back to himself. "You don't have to go, Duo." He recovered with an effort, pulling his pager out of his pocket and summoning a servant. When Gibson appeared, Zechs ordered, "Dinner for two. Bring it here."
"Yes, sir," Gibson replied properly and Duo sourly saw the deference he gave Zechs, the deference that had been lacking in his dealings with Duo.
When Gibson had left, Zechs settled back in his chair and motioned Duo to do the same. "Now, tell me how you knew my meeting had been with representatives of Relena."
Duo found a grin, though he was still wary of Zechs changing moods. "Well, servants gossip and one mentioned to another that they had seen Wu Fei." Duo faked a feminine voice. "Oh, how handsome!" He chuckled and Zechs smiled. "I know Wu Fei works for Relena, so I just assumed he had escorted her la dee da person here or at least some of her hanger ons. When you were late, I put two and two together. I'm a genius, right?"
"La dee da person?" Zechs laughed and he felt himself relaxing. Duo looked so young and mischievous just then, he couldn't help but be amused. The lust and passion were still there underneath the surface, but Zechs felt the darkness receding, put to flight by an ex pilot's good humor and his own fearful realization that his relationship with Duo had changed.
"Yes, I did have a meeting with Relena's representatives," Zechs admitted, "and no, it didn't go well. Your powers of deduction are amazing," he joked and Duo laughed. It was beautiful, that laugh, Zechs thought, and infectious. He didn't want to ruin the sudden good humor by continuing a conversation that wasn't pleasant. He wanted to hear Duo's laughter some more.
Zechs rose from his chair and took an embroidered blanket from the back of the leather couch nearby. He spread it out before the fire. It was deep brown and crimson red, an embroidery of renaissance designs done in gold. The thing was an antique and worth a small fortune in the gold needlework alone. Zechs threw the couch pillows on top of it and then turned to Duo.
"Do you think this will be comfortable for you?" Zechs asked. "There isn't a table wide enough in here for the meal I had prepared for you."
"A late night picnic?" Duo wondered with an even wider grin. "I didn't know you could be so spontaneous, Zechs. I guess I was dreading the dinning room anyway," he admitted. "I never had much of a chance to eat at a table when I was growing up, or as a Gundam pilot. The floor is much more what I'm used to."
Zechs noted a tinge of self recrimination in Duo's tone. "My table has usually been my lap on campaigns and in makeshift barracks," Zechs replied. "The dinning room intimidates me as well."
Zechs was rewarded by a look of gratitude. He felt a warmth inside at that acknowledgement of kindness. Zechs realized then that it had been far too long since he had dropped his guard and not used every word that came out of his mouth to fence with some aristocrat or ambassador.
"Do you need help?" Zechs wondered solicitously.
"I'm not an invalid!" Duo snapped without real anger. "I can get around... just slowly."
"Of course," Zechs replied and backed away.
It was slow, the way Duo eased himself out of the chair and onto the floor, but he did accomplish it without too many groans and gasps of pain. Settling against a pillow, he closed his eyes for a moment and then opened them as he smiled at Zechs. "Mission accomplished."
Zechs settled close by, putting a pillow in his lap to rest on, but also to hide any visible sign that Duo was exciting him again. The young man's flushed face, his bright eyes, and the creamy line of his neck plunging into his dress shirt collar as he reclined back on his pillow, was unintentionally provocative.
They talked then, about the war, about their lives, about the food when it came. Duo laughed, joked, and admitted to his confusion about how to lead his life. Zechs said things he had never said to anyone, his fear before a battle, his grief at so many lives lost, the agony of going mad because of the Zero system. Duo had listened intently, drinking in every word Zechs uttered and, in the end, offering some forgiveness; forgiveness Zechs didn't think he deserved.
"You did go mad," Duo said softly, "and it caused you to attack and kill people. I had a taste of the Zero system too. I know how it feels and what it can make a man do. I hated you, you know, but.... I can understand how it could happen, how your mind was twisted. I-I don't hate you anymore, Zechs."
Zechs had felt his heart clench at those words. So many people hated him and wanted him dead for what he had done. That the one man who mattered most to him was willing to forget that hate.... Mattered most. Zechs turned those two words over and over in his head, trying one last time to escape the truth. It was futile. His heart had fallen, stolen by an impish young man with an impossibly long braid.
They were very close. Duo's skin was glowing and warm from the fire of the fireplace. He was smiling softly at Zechs, his body stretched out against pillows next to the food, a glass of some juice in one hand. Zechs lost his willpower all in an instant. He leaned forward very slowly, very hesitantly, and then kissed Duo's silken lips.
It was brief, that kiss, but the shock of it seemed to jolt the both of them as something passed between them, an undefinable soul meeting soul joining that was more intense than anything either of them had ever felt before.
Duo shivered, closed his eyes, and breathed in Zechs' unique spicy scent as his lips tasted Zechs lips and found them sweet and compelling. It was only a moment, a moment of total surrender, and then the moment was past and Duo was staring at a man who was kissing him, an ex enemy, an unknown personality with unknown objectives, but first and foremost, a man!
Duo recoiled, turning flaming red in embarrassment. "Shit, Zechs!" Duo exclaimed. "You said you wouldn't do that! I told you, I'm not gay! Why did you have to ruin everything?"
Zechs went cold and furious as he leapt to his feet, fists clenched. He had never been so humiliated and rejected in his life! Duo had responded! He had kissed him back! The damn tease! The damn, L2 street rat! It was a moment before Zechs registered Duo's shocked, red face, and realized that he had said those words out loud.
"Fuck you!" Duo exploded. "I didn't ask for that!" He surged to his feet, crying out at the pain, clutching his ribs, but ignoring it all as he turned on his training and pumped his blood full of adrenalin. "Guess now I know what you really think of me," He said through gritted teeth. "Guess I always knew, deep down."
Duo staggered to the door as Zechs watched him, still furious, but beginning to feel a coldness over take him, the coldness of loss. He was losing Duo. He had said things that could never be taken back or forgiven. A voice screamed for him to try, to say something before Duo went through that door. The darkness was stronger. It whispered to Zechs that it was what he deserved, playing with street trash, imagining that he could love or be loved by even someone like that.
Duo threw open the doors of the study. "Gibson!" Duo shouted between pants of pain. "I'm getting out of here!" He threw over his shoulder back at Zechs. "Nice party, Zechs, but I think I'll stick with the other rats from now on."
Duo was gone then and Zechs was left staring at an empty doorway. With a cry of fury and self loathing, Zechs turned and rammed a fist into the wall.
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TBC