Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Mini Fics ❯ Part One ( Chapter 1 )

Ok, minna, this is just my screwed up attempt at humor...kind of, I guess. Anyway, I'm too tired for a decent A/N. It's only 9 o'clock, and I feel like curling up with EW and some popcorn. Pathetic, huh? Anyway, I guess this *is* kind of funny. Kind of insane, too. Well, you'll just have to check it out, because my brain isn't working....*mutters to self and walks off*

"AAAAIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"

Wufei jumped and spit out the coffee he had been attempting to drink as the banshee cry echoed through the house. "Aaarrgggghhhh! Maxwell!"

He vaulted out of his seat and rushed into the living room of one of Quatre's many homes. "Maxwell, what are you doing??"

Duo jumped up from his position in front of the TV and clutched his controller to his chest. "AAHHH!!"

"Maxwell, quit yelling!" screamed Wufei.

"Only if you do!" came the very loud answer.

"FINE!! What on earth are you doing?"

Duo's expression turned fiery. "I *was* playing Ms. Pacman."

Wufei sweatdropped. "And?"

"I LOST!" Duo was back to screaming again.

"Why? And who cares?"

"I CARE!!" he screamed. "This stupid controller is a POS!!!!!"

Wufei looked at him. "Really."

Duo blushed. "Yes."

"Did it ever occur to you that it might be your own weakness that caused your loss?"

"NEVER!!!! SHINIGAMI NEVER LOSES!!!!"

The Chinese boy snorted. "Of course not, Maxwell. Now go back to playing your little game and be quiet."

"Ok, Wu-man."

Wufei shook his head and walked out of the room, wondering exactly how he was going to get those coffee stains out of his white silk....

Ten minutes later:

"AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!!" crashed through the silence.

Wufei screamed at the American as boiling coffee spilled over his lap again.

~*x*~*x*~*x*~*x*~*x*~

Trowa stared at the table in front of him. Of course, to a passerby, it just looked like he was just hunched over, because of his hair, but he was really staring at the table. Or, rather, what was on the table. His lunch, to be precise.

They really were strange things, when you think about it. Who on earth came up with a name like that? "Sandwich." That isn't something that just popped into someone's head, you know. Nope, this took careful deliberation and thought-out contemplation.

It's not like they just put two words together too, like "bread-filling." No, that would make too much sense. They were obviously trying to throw someone off. But who?

Sandwiches have been around forever, so it couldn't be someone recent. It had to be someone from a long time ago, maybe an earl or a duke or something.... But *why*? Did it really matter that much? It *was* just a sandwich...but maybe not. No, it was much more involved than that...

He looked up. "I've got it."

Quatre looked at him, suprised. "Got what, Trowa?"

"It was a world-wide conspiracy of chefs. They didn't want the lords and ladies to find out what sandwiches are really made of and why. So they hid them with a non-sensical label."

Quatre looked at him quizzically. "Sure they did, Trowa."

~*x*~*x*~*x*~*x*~*x*~

"But Quatre, I went last time!!" shouted Wufei in a momentary bout of anger.

The Arabian smiled sweetly at him. "Yes, I know Wufei, but it only seems fair after you dropped all the groceries during your last justice rant."

"But-but...why does DUO have to come??"

Quatre's smile turned evil. "We thought it would...make up for our suffering."

Wufei groaned and smacked his head on the table as Duo flew into the room, dragging chaos with him like a second layer of clothing.

15 minutes later...

"No, Duo, *I'm* going to push the cart."

"Aww, but Wu-man..."

"Do. Not. Call. Me. That."

Duo pouted. A flicker of amusement flashed through his eyes an instant before he switched to hurt-puppy mode. His violet eyes grew to an almost impossible size and filled with tears, and his lower lip trembled, earning him several sympathetic looks from other shoppers and many glares aimed at Wufei.

Wufei stammered and attempted to defend himself before giving up completely and dragging Duo by his braid into the food-filled aisles.

"Let's see, what all did Quatre want?" he murmured as he looked over the list. "Pasta, milk, eggs, bread, pickles...PICKLES??? Why would he want pickles?!"

Duo shrugged and tried to look innocent.

Wufei glared at him for a second. "Ok, somehow this is your fault, so you have to help me. Go get the eggs and the milk. Now."

Duo happily bounced down the aisle, intent on finding his prey.

Wufei shook his head and attempted to ignore the little voice in his head that kept informing him that maybe a Duo loose in the grocery store wasn't the best idea…

Ten minutes later…

"And stay out!"

Wufei threw a glare at the man, before turning on Duo, who was happily licking an ice cream cone.

"What were you doing in there, Maxwell??"

Duo shrugged. "I didn't do anything. Honest! It's not *my* fault that those shelves aren't as sturdy as they could be."

Wufei smacked his forehead. "Baka!"

Duo licked his ice cream cone innocently. "What? Anyway, Quatre is *not* going to be happy that you didn't get the groceries."

Wufei sputtered. "That *I* didn't get the groceries?? But *you* were the one who got us kicked out!"

Duo shrugged and waved happily to a passing pedestrian who was looking at them strangely.

Wufei groaned and began banging his head on the sidewalk. Duo looked at him for a moment, then went back to eating his ice cream,

~*x*~*x*~*x*~*x*~*x*~

AN: Ok, this is just my sad attempt at some minifics. Actually, I had the ideas; I'm just too lazy to write out the whole thing so I made them short. I'm sooooo bored....anyway, I think I'll just post this instead of continuing with another mini fic...unless I get 15 reviews asking for more...which I won't, so that's ok. Anyway, even though I'm not expecting it, be responsible and review!!! It's your "mission", ok? C'mon, say it with me..."Mission: Accepted."