Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ notice ❯ Close Call ( Chapter 2 )

Title: Close Call

Overall Rating: NC-17 for mature themes. Not for the impressionable.

Chapter Rating: PG-13

DISCLAIMER: The series Gundam Wing and the characters therein do not belong to me. I'm just putting them in different situations to see how they react.

Chapter Summary: Heero is noticing unusual behaviors.

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It's been three days now, and the opportunity to talk to Duo has not yet arisen. I've been watching him closely. When he knows I'm around, he's basically his usual cheerful self. He makes an effort to be so, I can tell. When he doesn't know I'm there, however, he's different.

For one thing, he's quiet. For Duo, that in itself is a red flag. He's becoming more and more…introspective I guess is how I would put it. Just last night, we were watching a video I know he enjoys. It was a comedy. At least three separate times he totally missed the joke. I didn't point this out to him, but it hurt me to see him just staring at the screen, not really seeing it.

I've been doing a lot of thinking in these few days. Just what do I feel for Duo? I care for him, surely. He's my best friend. But how much do I care for him? I did discover an 'interest' in him. I have the soiled sheets from dreaming about him to prove that. But is that all I want? His body?

It's a very nice body, to be sure. I glance at him where he's curled at his end of the couch. He's gained a few inches over the years I've known him. He'll never be as tall as Trowa, but then, who of us will? He's just a bit shorter than I am. He's also still very slim. He won't "bulk up" like most males. He has a malnourished childhood to thank for that. But what there is of him is all muscle. Not an ounce of fat anywhere. Surprising, that. I've seen him eat.

Then there's his face. Sort of heart-shaped features, slightly up-turned nose, large eyes. Those eyes are amazing. They are a violet blue and as expressive as his voice. He may be able to mask how he feels in his voice, but he can't hide his eyes. They tell all.

His most distinctive feature, other than his eyes, would have to be his hair. It's brown with multi-colored highlights. Depending on the lighting, it ranges anywhere from a light brown to chestnut. To say that it's long would be the understatement of the century. The braid he keeps it in brushes his thighs when he walks. Loose, it hangs just below his knees. There's a story behind that hair. I know, he's told it to me. Now, it's just such a part of him that cutting it would….

"Heero. Earth to Heero. Come in Heero." Duo is staring at me, waving his hand in front of my face.

I reach out and grab the offending hand, halting it's motion. "Stop that."

"You've been staring at me for the last several minutes. Something wrong?"

Please tell me that my face isn't as red as it feels. "I was thinking is all."

"About me?" He settles beside me and lays his head on my shoulder. "Aww, Heero, I didn't know you cared."

That does it. Now I know my face is flaming. In fact, my entire body is warming up. And not just in embarrassment either. Bits and pieces of my recent dreams are flashing through my head. This isn't good.

Let me rephrase that. The scenes flying through my memory are good…very, very good. They just aren't appropriate for this particular situation.

"Baka, of course I care. You're my best friend. You know that."

"You're my best friend, too." He snuggles a bit closer.

Now what? I wanted to talk to him, but I can't seem to think coherently at the moment. He's too close. I can feel the heat radiating from him where he's pressed against my arm. I glance down at him. I can see the top of his head where it's resting on my shoulder.

Suddenly, he tilts his head up to look at me and I'm drowning in those eyes. I want him…more than I've wanted anyone before.

A small part of me tears itself away and starts yelling at me. //He's your best friend!//

I already know that.

//Something is wrong. Remember? You wanted to talk to him, not screw him!//

I can do both. I multi-task well.

My eyes pull themselves away from his and travel down that sweet face to his mouth. His lips look so soft. I wonder how they would taste. Are they as sweet as they are in my dreams?

//Where's Dr. J when you need him?//

That worked.

Now that my brain is functioning again I notice that although Duo hasn't moved, he's a bit stiffer than he was. Just a fraction, but noticeable to me. I look back at his eyes. Those expressive eyes. Before they start to drift closed I can see desire there, or is that wishful thinking? But there is something more. I'm not sure just what, but something I'm not pleased with. It isn't fear…

Resignation??

His yawn causes a welcome distraction.

Gently pushing him away, I reach for the remote and turn off the TV. "We should get some sleep."

"Yeah," he says with a grin. "We should while we can. Tomorrow's gonna be a late night…I hope."

We were meeting with the others after work for a night on the town. Quatre and Trowa were visiting for the weekend and we had been looking forward to visiting with them. We all kept in touch via phone and e-mail, but didn't get many opportunities to spend time together.

"Good night, Duo. I'll lock up."

"Night."

I performed my nightly rituals on automatic, lost in thought. I had been about to kiss Duo. He hadn't seemed averse to the idea. He didn't pull away. But he'd stiffened, however slightly. It hadn't been enough that one would really notice, but I'd been watching for just such a thing. Well, when my hormones weren't in the picture that is. And that resignation in his eyes. I didn't understand that at all.

I notice his light is still on when I come out of the bathroom. I started to knock, intending to wish him a good night again, when I spotted him through the partially open door. He was sitting on his bed with his gun out.

He had apparently been cleaning it. This in itself wasn't unusual. I did the same thing frequently enough. But at this time of night?

I stood there, watching him. He paused, the fully assembled weapon in one hand and the clip in the other. He just stared at them.

After a moment, he shook his head slightly and pointedly put the clip in the drawer of the nightstand before putting the gun back in it's place under his mattress. What had he been thinking while he stared at that lethal collection of metal parts? And why not keep it loaded like we both usually did?

"Hey, Heero. What's up?" He'd noticed me standing there.

"I'm going to get a drink. You want anything?"

"Nah. I'm beat. See you in the morning."

"Good night, Duo."

I headed for the kitchen, mind whirling. This was starting to scare me. If the opportunity to talk to Duo didn't present itself soon, I would confess I'd overheard his conversation.

I considered just going to him right now. But what would I say? That I'd seen him cleaning his gun and it scared me?

I gave myself a mental whack. What was I thinking? That Duo was suicidal or something?

I'm the one that spent most of the war trying to get myself killed. Not Duo. He was the one that kept us all full of life.

I couldn't help a small snort at the thought of Shinigami, the god of death, being the one to fill us pilots with life. I'd have to remember that one. Duo would get a kick out of it.

Well, he would if he were his normal self, that is. Which right now, he wasn't. What's going on with you Duo? Why won't you talk to me?

TBC