Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Peace? ❯ Attempt at Prologue ( Chapter 1 )

"Some battles are worthy fighting with weapons real and physical, others with words, yet still the most effective weapon is the human hart". - Albert Sholemakher, Albert the 1st of the Eastlands and Odesa, King of Tz.A.N.K.U (Tze Akhrana Novyi I Krasnay Ukraini- The Defenders of the New and Beutifull Ukraine), the Peacecraft.

 

The princess turned politicians daughter turned back princess (and politician) reflected on the events of the past months. Being orphaned, finding out this is the second time you are orphaned, finding out who your biological family was, surviving four assassinations, meeting with the strangest bunch of terrorist the system had ever seen, and still more to come! If that couldn't drive one up the wall, add a pinch of healthy panic, and it'll do its job. Being Relena Peacecraft isn't an easy thing, even more so than being Relena Dolorian. Now people looked up to her as they did for her family for an age, making her wonder if she could supply the merchandise they wanted, world peace.

 

Actually, thinking about it, world peace was available and easily attainable at her time, more so than ever before. First of all almost no Nation State existed, all the "Countries" where artificially formed by such armed associations as where there on the ground, all the leadership having the same ideology, the same approach and about the same level of intelligence (they all have Rheinmetall Homogenized Rolled Steel for skulls, thick enough to block a fifty megawatt laser impulse, that thick!) even her own brother dearest (only that he was honest enough to show it and not hide it behind a mask of synthetic skin). No, you are not mistaken, the mask is indeed his REAL face moderate features, and it is the mask. And if someone is anything better in the department of processors, had minds ranging form simple laser sights (pick a target, aim GO!) to an advanced fire control computer (which even in 195AC couldn't give a round counter, or "no aim no fire" system). Looking around her, she sighed with a heavy hart, wondering how they didn't die out. (It's like humans are de-evolving back to apes, better looking apes, but apes nonetheless).

 

No, really, she decided to revive the old policy of humanism in Sank' and what did they do? Send her an annoying demagogue who they brainwashed to speak for them, as she is too smart to really have come and believe in the stuff she is advertising. Really, Dorothy Catalunya can't be that stupid, because if she where, she would be packing a semiautomatic under her dress, two hand grenades in her bra (no way a fifteen year old is so buxom) and a suicide bomber's belt in her corset, not to mention the VX pills in false teeth in her mouth, the dagger in her boot and a compact Antimatter detonator god forbids where.

 

You say it and I vote for it with you, Relena peacecraft is healthy a 16 year old girl.

 

But why dose she enjoy arguing with me so much, it's as if her family communicated only that way, no other explanation to that, she goes like "Hello, my name is Dorothy Catalunya and I'm a bloody minded Militarist, I like war more than I like chocolate, more than I like boys, more than I like brushing my hair!!!" and when you point to her that she brushes her hair an hour a day, she just smiles and goes like "I still care about how I look, it's for the open casket military funeral if I die in battle, so that no dressing up will be necessary". If I weren't for life, peace and prosperity, I would have choked her long ago. Why can't they all just give me a brake, I kind of need psychological counseling here, I'm in the middle of an identity crisis, mourning my father, but they say "No, go save the world, because we are too lazy, stupid and ignorant to do it ourselves. Sigh shish! Oy Veyz Mir, Peacecraft, Spasay Mir. Now when exactly the entire world became Odessa Mama?

 

Additional work in this mindset turned out to be impossible as one Arab wannabe (ether he's form Al-Aurance clan, or his mommy an Caucasian, or... he's a Winner, a loser yiddisher kinder just like my dearest brother, but he's also a Rababa, and they knew back in the 2200's how to make a blasting suicide belt!) and one gloomy Nihonjin form the colonies stormed into her room (Like, don't these militarist types ever knock?).

"Your majesty, would you like for us to slaughter all the enemies of peace on earth" offered Heero helpfully (No, I still need the record of my kingdom clear form crimes against humanity. We've managed this for four centuries and this with almost entirely Kazak population. Go get someone to shake up our bones!)

"Thank you, Yui-san, that is not necessary, would you like some tea"? (And they say he's not the imaginative one! If I didn't know better, than I might have though that he is joking, but he's dead serious!)

"Don't worry, your majesty, as long as I'm here, I'll try to keep an eye on my overzealous and gloomy friend here" Quatre tried to reassure Relena, and managed to do so perfectly. Even though he was a terrorist himself, at least he had the healthy brains to work about it sometimes and be a good guy.

 

"Good to hear, now I'll be giving another history of politics class today after lunch, you are invited (that won't melt your militarist brains, only a direct plasma beam will do something like that!) To join in, if you promise to behave, Quatre"

 

"I'll be as good as a lamb". Not very reassuring form an teen Arab, who got hormones coursing inside in amounts unlike anything anybody but Father Maxwell experience (Now that's a normal one, he's a catholic priest, a terrorist and a closet pervert, makes whole lot of sense, unlike the other idiots)

 

All which crossed Relena's mind was really one question "Why can't I have a little peace"?

 

End Prologue!

 

Author's note: I wrote this as an answer to my ex-classmate Naomi (Thanks for loaning me those GW VCD's back in my Basic training, they allowed me to survive and become a REAL soldier)-see her yaoi works only in http://www.duoxheero.com , who loves Relena bashing as much as she likes bishi-mating, and to all of you who think she doesn't deserve a role of a main character in a fic, I personally consider her the strongest and most just character in the wole GW series.

 

If you liked this prologue, please write a review so that I'll know if this project is worth continuing, if it happens for me to continue this project, more information on the past of the GW world will be revealed, some plot and Relena+Dorothy pairing!