Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Perfectly Broken ❯ Chapter 10 ( Chapter 10 )

Chapter 10

 

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

 

"Why would I hate you Heero?" Duo demanded.

 

"Because I had to keep secrets from you." Duo smirked a bit.

 

"Everyone has secrets Heero, even me. I'm not trying to hassle you into anything. I just want to know if what they said on the news is true." Duo asked me softly.

 

"It is. I lived with J ever since I can remember."

 

"You said lived, as in past tense. I didn't see him when I delivered your supplies to you or that day I found you starving to death and passing out." Duo frowned a bit and locked eyes with me. "Where is he now?" I couldn't lie to Duo.

 

"He's dead. I buried him in the back yard." Duo's eyes widened and his jaw hung open for a minute before he sputtered back to normal and shook himself a bit. He took a few deep breaths and then turned away, going to look out the window.

 

"You didn't kill him did you?" Duo asked, not looking at me. The loss of those beautiful eyes made me go cold inside, but still I plowed on, determined to answer all of Duo's questions no matter what.

 

"No, I didn't. One morning, I was making him his breakfast and he didn't show up. So, I went looking for him and found him dead on the floor of his bedroom. I didn't know what else to do, since I didn't want him to start to stink, I just buried him in the backyard."

 

"And now people are looking for the both of you." Duo turned back to me, the look he gave me was icy and I had to look away.

 

"Yes, they are." I didn't know what else to say. Duo probably didn't want me here anymore. That thought caused my heart to twist painfully in my chest, but I would do it anyway if that's what Duo wanted. "I-I'll leave."

 

"What?" Duo looked up at me sharply, stunned.

 

"I'll go back... back to the house and explain to them w-what happened. I've c-caused you enough t-trouble. I'll go b-back today if y-you want m-m-me to." I said a bit shakily and bit my lip before I started to cry.

 

I didn't want to go back to the house, not unless I absolutely had to. Duo would have his own bed again with me gone from it. That should make him happy. Maybe he and Hilde could go back to being whatever they were before I came along. I had lost my chance at having him before I could even tell him what I felt.

 

I was so absorbed in my own thoughts I didn't feel when Duo came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me. "Heero, calm down." Duo whispered in my ear, startling me. I trembled in his arms, feeling like this was the last time he would ever hold me like this. "Shhh. It's okay. I don't want you to leave Heero. Don't say such things. It's just a shock for me to find out you were living with a doctor for so long and have all this information poured into my brain in one day. I'm not trying to accuse you of anything either. It's just my curiosity talking. I didn't mean to make you think I wanted you to leave."

 

Duo kept holding me and whispered words of comfort into my ear, telling me to let it out, but I was afraid to do it. "It's okay Heero, just let it out. Let yourself go. It's okay to cry, I'm right here." I broke in his arms again and cried into his soft, warm neck. Hot tears soaked Duo's shirt in seconds and all I could do was hold onto Duo.

 

When I was spent and the rest of my strength left me, Duo gathered me up in his arms and carried me to the couch. He sat down with me in his lap and stroked my hair away from my eyes. He even wiped away my tears and kissed my forehead. He waited for me to settle down and fixed me with those lovely orbs.

 

"Can you tell me about your life before I found you?" He asked me gently. I turned the question around in my head before relenting. Duo deserved to know.

 

"I don't remember much before Dr. J, but I know there was a man before him that taught me how to defend myself with self defense and all kinds of weapons. J had me when I was very young and wanted to further that training along with others. He said I was going to be his perfect weapon, the perfect solider. He told me to suppress my emotions and not show them even if I felt something. It was hard to do that, but I learned anyway. Although in order to do that and become his perfect weapon, I had to be educated as well."

 

"Every day I was to study one chapter of each and every different subject he would give me and memorize everything and repeat it back to J in order to pass. He'd test me every week on the subject matters and if I didn't get everything perfect, I was... punished."

 

"Punished? How?" Duo frowned and waited for me to continue. I felt my body start to tremble again and closed my eyes tightly before answering him.

 

"J would beat me, either with a whip or other things that hurt terribly, but normally he would use me." I swallowed painfully and looked at Duo and saw confusion in his eyes. I had no choice but to enlighten him about what I was. "J fucked me like his own personal whore. He liked taking me since I was helpless. He would strap to a metal table and take me whenever he wanted. I had no choice but to obey, unless I wanted to suffer a beating. Even after that he made sure I was to hurt to fight back and would leave me laying there in agony for hours, until he saw it fit. I got to shower afterwards, but it was always cold and made my muscles cramp. It was like living in hell, if there is such a place."

 

Duo's mouth dropped open and I turned my face away, not wanting to see the disgust that Duo was probably feeling. After all, he'd been sharing his bed with me for the past few months. He wouldn't be able to see me like he had before. I was tarnished.

 

My chin was then cupped by a hand that forced me to look at Duo. He looked deep into my eyes for a few moments before bring his forehead to rest against mine. I blinked in surprise and waited for him to speak.

 

"Listen to me Heero. You aren't dirty and you aren't a whore, okay?" I nodded even if I felt like it was the truth anyway. "I want you to promise me that you'll never call or think of yourself that way again." My eyes widened.

 

"What?"

 

"Promise me." Duo urged me, even as I felt my mouth open and my tongue obey him.

 

"I promise. I won't think or call myself that again."

 

"Good. No one should have ever treated you that way, Heero. I won't let anyone ever treat you like that again, I promise you. I won't ever treat you like that." He pulled back and stroked my cheek with the backs of his fingers, sadness evident in his eyes. "I'm sorry to hear what happened to you, I wish I could go back and keep you safe."

 

"You do?" I asked shocked.

 

"Yeah, I do. A part of me wishes J was still alive so I could beat the shit out of him for doing those things to you."

 

I licked my lips nervously. "It's better that he's dead though. I don't want to tell the reporters what happened. They would just stare at me and pity me. I hate it when people stare at me. It makes me nervous."

 

"Do I make you nervous?" Duo asked softly.

 

"No. You make me feel... " I stopped, I couldn't tell him that.

 

"I make you feel what?" He asked, not letting me get away with stopping mid-sentence.

 

I darted my eyes to look at his face then whispered. "Loved. Is that wrong?"

 

"No. It isn't." He shook his head. "There's nothing wrong with it and I'm glad I make you feel that way. I do love you."

 

"But... you can't." I said in a rush, that made Duo give me a funny look.

 

"And why not?" He pressed, wrapping his arms tightly around me, making me flush.

 

"You love Hilde, you can't love me, I mean. Quatre said he and Trowa love you so... How many people can you love?"

 

"As many as I want to." Duo smirked at me. "There are different kinds of love Heero. Sure I love Hilde, Quatre and Trowa, but I love them as a friend. Friend love is different than loving a person you desire with all your heart and for me, that person is you."

 

I sat there stunned beyond words. I didn't know what to say. Duo chuckled at me a little then pulled me closer to him and kissed my cheek.

 

"I love you more than anything and even with these hidden truths of yours, I still know I want you around. I want you to stay here, with me and Quatre and Trowa. Will you?"

 

"Yes. I want to stay with you and Quatre. I feel safe and comfortable here." I told him before bending a bit to place a tiny kiss on Duo's cheek.

 

"Feels like love to me." Duo remarked.

 

We sat there for a while and cleared the air. I felt better, relieved that Duo didn't want me to leave and couldn't stop the flutter of happiness in my chest knowing that Duo loved me, even if I hadn't told him I loved him back in the same way. It just wasn't the time yet.

 

Duo let me use his computer and I hacked the system and found Dr. G's number and with Duo's insistence, I told him what happened to Dr. J. He understood and told me he would get rid of the reporters' questions and make up a cover story so I would be left alone. I was told J was fond of me, but all I could think of was how he treated me and it made me shudder.

 

"At least J left everything to you. You should be happy. You're rich Heero. Do whatever you want, unless you want to come serve me instead." Dr. G told me over the phone and I politely declined his offer, wanting nothing to do with scientists ever again. I had more than enough that I could take with mad scientists.

 

Duo didn't plow right in and tell me he wanted to fuck me like the dream-Duo did. We just acted like we always did and were still working friends at Howard's Delivery Supplies and Services. Quatre and Trowa noticed that something was different when they got up in the morning, but didn't say anything. It was like nothing changed. Except something had and it made me happy to know Duo cared.

 

I knew how Duo felt about me and I didn't have to worry how to act like I wasn't interested in him when he was around. The truth was out of the bag and I could finally hug Duo like I had wanted to for the longest time without worrying about what he would think of me.

 

I arranged for checks to come to the apartment. I got paid the interest from my stocks that gave me more than a little pocket money to spend and arranged for my check from delivering supplies to people went directly to my savings accounts. I still donated to charities and some science divisions researching diseases, but mostly I donated to people in foreign countries that needed help.

 

Since I intended to stay with Duo we moved more of my stuff into his room. Mostly, I just needed clothes and took my soaps and other things I wanted with me. I made sure to bring a laptop from J's collection that had my record information so I could access the rest of my accounts J had left me. I finally had money to use myself instead of allowing Duo to pay for everything. I even contributed to the rent, even though Quatre was reluctant to take it. I was almost as rich as he was so I didn't want to keep everything when it was pointless.

 

Duo and I often went out to lunch after our deliveries, we switched off on who treated and who was being treated. Everything had settled into a nice pattern, even when we went to sleep.

 

Since I was going to stay with Quatre and Duo on a more premanent basis, Quatre suggested I bring my bed into Duo's room, which Duo outright refused. He explained to Quatre more than a little forcefully that there wouldn't be enough room and we were perfectly happy sleeping in the same bed. Quatre just got this, 'they're so cute' look on his face and Duo hit him with a pillow, only to reinforce it by suggesting he get a bed for Trowa. Kat declined the offer and dropped the subject needless to say.

 

I still always slept best when Duo had his arms wrapped around me, and I even went as far as crawling onto his chest if I wasn't comfortable. Duo would just stroke my hair until I drifted off and even then, I would wake up in his arms. I got over part of my shyness and cuddled in Duo's lap when we watched a movie or just wanted to lay on the couch. Duo would always make room for me and I would gladly accept the invitation.

 

Quatre raised his eyebrows at us a few times before not bothering to care anymore. He said as long as we were both happy, he'd be happy. Trowa didn't care one way or the other, he just liked being wrapped around his blond angel. Things were really good.

 

It was almost the winter solstice when I finally thought about getting gifts for the guys and Duo. I asked for Duo to take me shopping and he willingly agreed, saying he had to pick up christmas gifts. That puzzled me and I asked him what that was. He laughed until he realized I wasn't joking.

 

"You really don't know what christmas is?" He glanced over at me then turned his gaze back to the road.

 

"Not really. J once told me it was a christain holiday to celebrate their savior, but he didn't expand upon it. I always believed mother nature controlled the everything and what we did in our life determined what we will be in our next life."

 

"Pagan beliefs. I like how you explained that. I used to be Catholic a long time ago, but not anymore. Kat's Muslim and doesn't believe in that stuff either, but he likes getting gifts for us just the same. That's why we don't have a christmas tree. Trowa is an atheist, but he loves Quatre and staying here so he gets us gifts too. Christmas is pretty much the holiday to exchange gifts and be with family and friends anymore with us, and now you get to be a part of it."

 

"I'm glad for that Duo." I smiled to myself and saw the mall coming up into view. "So what do you want for your present?"

 

"Anything you think I'll like." He told me and shot me a grin before pulling into a parking space.

 

"But what do you like besides food and movies?" I asked not getting any kind of real answer.

 

"Hmm... you." He kissed my cheek then got out of the car, leaving me stunned for a moment before getting out to join him.

 

"I meant what would you like me to get you? What do you need?"

 

"Honestly, I don't know. Let's just look around for awhile and if I find something, I'll let you know."

 

"Okay."

 

We looked around a few stores, seeing a bunch of sales, but none looked very appealing. Duo wanted to visit a department store so we went there next. It was there that I found a sweater that would look wonderful on Duo. It was a deep violet color and was so soft that I couldn't help but caress it with my fingers. Cashmere, the sign said and I bought it as well as a scarf for Duo, so he could keep warm when he went out for deliveries. I bought a light blue one for Quatre and a emerald green sweater for Trowa, since he always wore some kind of green outfit. They would look nice in their sweaters, I could only hope they would like them.

 

I had them gift wrapped and then went to go find Duo. I found him in the electronics and saw he had a few wrapped packages as well. He didn't notice me yet so I snuck up behind him and hugged him from behind. He went tense at first, then I saw him turn his head and breathe a sign of relief.

 

"Heero, way to startle me." He smirked a little shakily.

 

"You do it to me all the time." I pouted and he chuckled at me, before kissing my forehead.

 

"That I do. You found something I see." I followed his glance to my packages and I just shrugged. Duo explained to me that I couldn't tell anyone what I got for them. It would ruin the surprise.

 

"You found some things too." I pointed out and Duo just smirked.

 

"Are you saying we're all done then?"

 

"If you want to be. I don't know what Quatre and Trowa want." I said to throw him off and just tell me what everyone wanted. It didn't work.

 

"They'll be happy with whatever you get them. I'm sure of it. Quatre like classical music and Trowa likes trance and techno so I got them some cd's. You could always join forces with me to where we're going next."

 

"And where would that be?" I asked confused.

 

"To Mirage. The best clubbing and leather gear store there is. Kat and Tro love clubbing, so I think we should get them something together." Duo slid an arm around my waist and bumped hips with me as we walked out of the mall.

 

"The store isn't in the mall?"

 

"Nope. Normal people can't see what's in this store. It isn't appropiate for the kids, if you get my drift." Duo winked and placed his bags in the backseat before crawling into the car. I did the same and buckled my seatbelt before Duo took off again. It was a short drive and we were soon parked out front of a building that had the windows covered up.

 

"Uh Duo?" I asked, a little worried by the fact there was only one other car besides ours.

 

"Don't worry Heero, this is just mostly a night time store. They're open though come on."

 

"But the sign says you have to be eighteen to enter and I'm not..."

 

"I'll let them card me so don't worry. You're close enough any way." Duo got out and I followed him into the dim building.

 

It was lit better inside, but the displays... could people really want something so revealing and tight?

 

Duo led the way into the back of the store and I followed him, not wanting to lose sight of him. The store made me more than a little nervous. Duo didn't seem to be though and was shuffling through some studded collars.

 

"What about these for Kat and Tro?" Duo held up two identical bracelets with tiny silver x's and o's on it.

 

"Those are nice bracelets." Duo cracked up laughing. "What's so funny?"

 

"They aren't bracelets Heero. They're cock rings." I felt my stomach churn a bit and felt my face get hot.

 

"Oh." I said then felt a little curious and asked, "How do they work?"

 

"You're too cute. I'll buy one for us too. Don't worry, we don't have to use it right away. Only when it feels right we will, k?" Duo picked up another one that had smiley faces lining it and then went to pick out something called a dildo that looked like a bright green studded penis and a dog collar with a chain attached to it. We went up to the register and the guy that had more than enough piercings in his face, rang us up after he carded Duo.

 

"Oh put this on there too." He said after grabbing a box that read: Flavored Condoms and Lube, Satisfy Your Partner and Have a Good Taste in Your Mouth Too.

 

I wondered to myself if Quatre's and Trowa's gifts would be like this, only to grow more worried at the thought of what kind of gift Duo bought for me. His suggestion about the cock ring made me wonder what he was planning.

 

Good thing I wouldn't have to wait for long.

 

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

 

TBC...

 

Big THANK YOU'S and HUGGLES to Pryzm, EquineAngel, YaoiKitty, DK_Joy, Tati1, ZaKai, Nikkler, Serena429, Shiningami-Koi, and Shinigami-Heero! I Love hearing from you and I hope you liked this chapter.

 

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