Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Return to Me Salvation ❯ Tourniquet ( Chapter 2 )

Return to Me Salvation

By FantasiCat

Disclaimer: Think about it, if I owned Gundam Wing would I be writing fanfics?

Chapter 2: Tourniquet

Duo sat on the floor in the middle of his room, mesmerized by the play of moonlight on the blade in his hand. It's for the best, he told himself. I'll be out of everyone's hair for good. They won't have to worry about the stupid, worthless baka anymore. Fully convinced that this was the best plan, he slowly lowered the knife to his wrist. Best get it over with quickly, Duo thought, and in one fluid motion slashed his left arm from the wrist almost to the elbow. As he watched the blood well up from the cut, he wondered absently why it didn't hurt. Then the pain hit him.

I tried to kill the pain
But only brought more

(So much more)

He lay back, gasping in agony. All for you, Heero. I hope… I hope you'll be happy when I'm gone. As the pain intensified, Duo realized the full, entire consequences of his actions. I'm really going to die now. Oh God, I don't want to die! Tears fell unnoticed from his wide eyes to disappear into his hair as he began to really pray for the first time since Father Maxwell died and the church had been destroyed.

I lay dying
And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal
I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved
Am I too lost?

Please God, I don't want to die. I don't want to die! Duo stopped his silent pleading for salvation. I may not want to die, but my dieing will make Heero happy. And I want Heero to be happy.

My God my tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God my tourniquet
Return to me salvation

Even in death, Heero filled his thoughts. Duo wondered if Heero had ever meant all the things he had said to him. He had almost convinced me that I was worth something. That the world needed me. That he loved me. Duo almost laughed at his naïveté, but it hurt too much. I wonder if I was ever anything more to him then an amusing distraction. Oh well, I guess it doesn't matter anymore. I hope I'll see you on the other side, Heero.

Do you remember me
Lost for so long
Will you be on the other side
Or will you forget me?

The pain began to fade and be replaced by a soothing lassitude that was both fiery hot and freezing at the same time. Huh, thought Duo sleepily. Maybe dying isn't so bad after all. I wish I could have said goodbye to my friends. Too late for that now. His eyes began to slide closed.

I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved
Am I too lost?
My God my tourniquet
Return to me salvation
My God my tourniquet
Return to me salvation

Just as Duo was giving into the compulsion to sleep, the sound of the front door banging open reverberated through the house, followed by the sound of Heero's voice calling his name frantically. Oh Heero, thought Duo. You're still trying to look out for me, aren't you? Well, you won't have to worry about me any longer. Just as he finished his thought, the door to his room flew open and Heero ran in. Duo caught sight of his frantic, pain-filled blue eyes as he fell to his knees beside him and gathered his limp body into his arms. The last thing Duo heard was Heero's whispered plea of, "Please don't die." Then everything went black as he slid into the still waters of oblivion.

My wounds cry for the grave
My soul cries for deliverance
Will I be denied Christ
Tourniquet
My suicide

To be continued…

A/N: I… can't believe I just wrote that. *sob sob* Poor Duo! I hate angst so much! Is Duo really dead? You'll have read the next chapter to find out! Ciao4now.

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