Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Starting Over ❯ Not Enough ( Chapter 5 )

Title: Starting Over

Author: Makoto Sagara
Series: Gundam Wing
Archive: fanfiction.net, afallenangel.net/makotosagara/, mediaminer.org, Foreverfandom.net, makochanupdates.livejournal.com; anywhere else, please ask
Category: Angst, Action

Pairings: 1+2+1, others unknown
Rating: T
Warnings: Shonen ai, language, angst, sap, Post-EW, Episode Zero story spoilers
Disclaimers: I make no money, so suing is pointless. If you think I own GW, then you need to see someone. I have the number to a nice doctor... Oh, SALLY!

Author's Notes: I know that everyone was confused as to what happened in the third chapter, and I hope that last chapter helped dispel some worries that might have lingered. If not, I'm here to listen, and if there's anything specific you want to see, I'm open to suggestions. ^^

Starting Over, Chapter 5 - Not Enough

Heero showered quickly, knowing that he had a lot to answer for, between the year he spent away without any contact and his sudden disappearing act that day. However, he had a plan, of sorts. Yes, it would work. If he could just keep Wufei from shooting him. Or Duo. It was a toss-up over who was going to kill him first. Of course, he could be wrong and it could be Quatre. Although, the blond would have to come back to L2 to take him out. He was safe from that corner for the moment.

`I'm only delaying the inevitable confrontation, which isn't something I normally do,' he thought calmly. `What is it that Dr. Shaw told me two weeks before I was released? I think it was something about learning more normal reactions to situations, instead of following on my training… I didn't think it would have happened this quickly, and certainly not like this.'

The orphanage was oddly silent as Heero made his way down to the TV room where everyone had gathered the night before. All of the children, aside from the two youngest, were staring aptly at the television, where a movie featuring talking animals was playing. When he entered, the five adults looked up, but Cathy and Hilde's attention went back to the children and the television.

Duo, Trowa and Wufei all stood, the braided man directing them into the kitchen. Heero followed them, wondering why he felt like he was about to be questioned within an inch of his life. “Cathy and Hilde aren't joining us for this?” he asked, only vaguely curious.

“I'll tell them later,” Duo answered carefully.

“Ah… So, what do you want to know first?”

“First of all, where were you for over a year?” Wufei shouted. His anger had twisted his normally blank face into a very unattractive scowl. “We searched everywhere for you and found nothing.”

“That was sort of the whole point of my disappearance,” Heero said with a huge sigh. He moved over to the counter near the sink and hopped up to sit on it. “I don't know much about how the rest of you were trained, but, from what I understand, J's training was extreme. Before he found me, I traveled with a hired killer, Odin Lowe.”

“Isn't that the name of the man who assassinated the real Heero Yuy?” Duo asked.

“Yes. When he died, J showed up and took me away. I think it was three months after that when my training began.” Heero shrugged, ignoring the looks on Duo and Wufei's faces. “I believe I was approximately seven at the time.”

Trowa had been oddly blank during the time Heero was talking, and he shrugged at the end. “We all have out tragic pasts, Heero, but what does your story have to do with why you disappeared?”

“I'm getting to that part, Trowa,” Heero said evenly. “From that point on, I was no longer raised, but brought up as a soldier… J referred to me as his Perfect Soldier. I remained like that until the time I met Duo and Relena.” He smiled, his blue eyes latching onto Duo's face, which was slowly turning a soft pink color.

“Well, that explains your ultra-friendly personality when we first met,” Duo said, looking away quickly. “Still doesn't explain what you did though.”

“I'm getting there,” the former Wing pilot replied. “After the battle with Wufei and the Mariemaia army, I was tired. Not just physically, because sleep never seemed to be enough to get me back to fighting form, even though Relena and I had discussed her needing a bodyguard and me requiring a purpose outside of being a Gundam pilot.

“It was probably a week after we disposed of the Gundams that I just couldn't take it anymore. I buried all records of myself, changed my identity and disappeared. That, you all know already, since you spent so long looking for me. What you don't know is that I changed my name to Yuri Gregor and checked into St. Sebastian's Center for Mental Diseases on Earth.”

“Hold on!” Duo walked up and stared directly into Heero's face, all traces of embarrassment replaced by nearly righteous fury. “You mean to tell me that while we were searching for your ass, you'd checked into a mental hospital? For a year?”

“Yes,” Heero whispered, watching Trowa and Wufei as they exchanged glances before looking at Duo for his reaction.

“Fuck you, Heero,” Duo growled before punching the other man directly in the face and shattering his nose. “You two can deal with him. I don't care if he stays, but he needs to stay the fuck away from me.” And then, he stomped out of the kitchen and a few moments later his heavy footsteps could be heard on the stairs. He was followed by the smaller Chinese man, who didn't even bother to spare Heero with a glare or a friendly glance.

Heero, smartly, stayed in the kitchen, pinching his nose and tilting his head back to stem the flow of blood from his obviously broken nose. `It's nice to know that he hasn't lost any of his strength in the last year,' he thought morosely. He was surprised when Trowa shoved a cloth in his line of sight and used it to mop up the blood dripping down his face.

“He'll get over it, I think,” the green-eyed man offered after a few moments of silence.

“Yes, I suppose he will, but he, and you all, have the right to be upset.”

“Do you think that letting all of us taking shots at you is going to make any of forgive you?”

“Wufei, possibly,” Heero answered. Trowa snorted and gave him a small smile. “What about you?”

“Well, Heero, I was worried, but I also know that you're fully capable of handling yourself.” The banged man shrugged. “I knew that you'd only be found when you wanted to be found. I tried to tell that to Quatre and Duo, but you're aware of how they are.”

“And Quatre couldn't tell that I was okay by that empathy he has?”

“That's a nice way of putting it, but he knew you were physically fine. It wasn't enough for Duo and Relena. She was shrieking that we'd helped you escape from her offer of hiring you as the head of her security forces. Duo was ranting about how you were avoiding emotionally difficult situations and how Relena was a stupid girl and should just leave. Wufei glowered at her so much she left in tears and the only two she'll talk to are Quatre and myself.”

“Why are you being so understanding, Trowa?”

“If anyone out of the four of us can understand you at all, I suppose it's me. Duo had his orphanage growing up and even the gang before and after that. Quatre's family, while a little unconventional, is rather normal for people of his class and religious background. Wufei's was rather normal as well, even if he won't admit it. As for me, we all know that I am not the real Trowa Barton. I grew up with mercenaries and did menial jobs for them until S found me and allowed me to be a mechanic while he was building Heavyarms. I was referred to as… I guess Nanashi is the closest thing in Japanese.”

“No-name,” Heero said tersely.

“Yes, that was me, until nearly the beginning of Operations Meteor. When the real Trowa Barton died, I took his place.” He shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal to him, and maybe it wasn't. Heero wasn't sure that he cared either. “And I didn't really have much emotional contact with anyone, not even Quatre, really, until I met Cathy.

“She took me in as a little brother, didn't ask a lot of pesky questions, helped me out when I needed it, and she talked to the owner of the circus to let me join. She says that she had a brother that would be our age if he'd lived. Her family was attacked and she is the only known survivor. I've sometimes wondered if there's more to the story and I talked to Quatre about it. A DNA test was brought up, but I think it would get Cathy's hopes up too much and would depress her if she didn't get the results she was looking for. As it stands, we, Duo and Hilde are as much family as we all can be, and we're here for these children as well.”

“Why are you sharing this, Trowa?”

“I'm trying to let you know that you're not the only one with issues.” Trowa gave the Japanese man a small smile. “Besides, Duo doesn't hide his emotions as well as he thinks he does. The rest of us are aware of how he feels. The question is how do you feel?”

“I'm confused. I didn't come here after I was released from the hospital just to let you know that I was okay. I wanted to see him. Now, however, I'm thinking that perhaps I misjudged how welcome I would be.”

“You're an idiot. He's just processing.” The banged man sighed. “You know, I missed the days when it was you and Quatre who understood him the most.” And with that, Heero was left on his own to work through his new information.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

`I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. How could he do this to me? I hate him!'

“Maxwell, where in the hell are you going?” Duo jumped at the sound of Wufei's voice but let out a little relieved sigh at the fact that it wasn't Heero following him.

“I just had to get away, `Fei. I couldn't stand looking at his face anymore.”

“And so you had to break his nose? Not that I'm complaining, mind you. I find it an improvement and saves me the trouble of doing so myself.” The Chinese man's thin lips twisted into a wry smile. “Besides, if I had done so, it would be seen as police brutality.”

“Oh, well, can't have that, can we, `Fei?”

“Not really. I do believe that Sally and Une would have my balls if I get written up for beating up a civilian, even if it is Yuy.”

Duo sat down on the stairs and looked down at his friend. “How are the scary ladies?”

“Relieved now that they know that Yuy is alive and not really out starting some sort of revolution on his own.” Wufei snorted and sat down next to Duo. “I wish there was some way to get things situated that didn't require me to not kill him.”

“You don't really want to kill him, any more than I want him gone, `Fei, and we both know it.”

“True,” Wufei answered, smiling again. “Although, I do owe him a defeat.”

Duo shook his head ruefully. “You're never going to get over that, are you?”

“Not anytime soon, Duo. The only other person to defeat me is dead.” Wufei's smiled died then. “And he was probably the most honourable opponent I've ever faced.”

“Sorry, I don't do honour. I deal with stealth and explosions.”

“Oh, you are still in the practice of blowing up military bases then?”

It was Duo's turn to smile. “Nah, but you can do some interesting things with toys nowadays. And the kids are amused. But, Cathy doesn't care too much for that. Hence why my stealth skills are still at peak.”

Wufei laughed, hard and full, and the sound let Duo's shoulders relax. “Yes, well, women can be scary.” He then let out a deep breath. “So, what are you going to do about Yuy?”

“What else can I do, `Fei? You know how I feel. Hell, everyone but Heero knows how I feel about him. `Snot like I bothered to hide it during the last year looking for him.”

“True, but that does not answer the question, Maxwell.”

“I dunno yet. Like I said, he can stay, but if he causes any trouble, he's out. Trowa, the girls and I have put too much effort into making this place work to have Heero stroll in here and screw everything up.”

“You're being decidedly grown up about this. I believe there is hope for you yet, Duo.” Wufei scowled as the American hugged him tightly. “Has anyone told the Screeching One about Yuy's return?”

“Um, I think Quatre called her yesterday, but since she doesn't talk to us, I have no clue.”

“Where is Winner, anyway? I thought he'd be here with you and Barton since Yuy's return.”

“Had to go back to WEI business. Sent some of his sisters for a while, but you know how that works out.” Duo shrugged and Wufei nodded sagely.

“Can we return now? I think you're calm enough to be around him, and if you can restrain yourself, so can I.”

“I guess so,” Duo sighed, pulling himself up to a standing position and heading down the stairs. The soft footfalls of Wufei could be heard behind him as they made their way into the TV room. The children all looked up at their entrance, but went back to watching the animated movie as soon as they recognized Duo and their Uncle Wufei.

Trowa stood off to the side with Cathy and Hilde, whispering. He was no doubt telling them all that happened in the kitchen between the four men and whatever else they wanted to know. Heero was looking in from the doorway of the kitchen, an almost lost look on his face. Duo, confused about everything, sighed before walking over to the Japanese man. “You didn't even have Tro set it for you? Are you some sort of masochist?” He looked over his shoulder at Wufei with a smile. “Could you get the first aid kit from under the sink and meet `Ro and I in the dining room, `Fei?”

“It would be my pleasure, Duo,” Wufei responded happily, walking swiftly to fulfill the request.

“After you,” Duo said, waving his hand in an overly exaggerated bow-like movement. Heero watched the braided man's face before nodding and heading into the other room. `Once I fix your face, you're going to tell me the rest of this fucked up story, Heero.'

TBC