Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Sweet Dreams ❯ Chapter 1

Disclaimers: Gundam Wing isn't mine. I'll cry about it later. "Sweet Dreams" belongs to the goddess that is Tori Amos.

Warnings: mild language, songfic, bitter Quatre POV

Beta: Harmonie Des Anges

A/N: This just came to me while driving home and listening to the cd. It's kind of poetry/prose/narrative or something. Anyway, I hope you like.
blah = lyrics

Sweet Dreams
by Solanum Dulcamara

I was eleven the first time I told my father he was wrong;
the modern Marie Antoinette.
As I stood, explaining life and war,
my proverbial "let them eat cake,"
my words hung in the air
rank with naiveté.

I was young and I was spoiled.
Is there wisdom in youth, perhaps...
An honesty in innocence
that adults refute because they can't have it?

Spoiled children can make correct decisions for the wrong reasons,
I was born a 'wrong reason,' but determined to do something right.

Parents tell their children fairy tales.
My father lived one.
Pacifism... glorious... false.
Like everything else about him.

He said the war was a farce,
evil,
unnecessary.

I agreed, but knew the crushing weight of oppression
would not lift if we simply became indignant.
I told him I would fight,
That I'd take my fight to them,
He said I was living a lie.

"Lies everywhere," said the father to the son

I told him he was living a lie.
He told me people would die if I went to war.
I told him people would die if I didn't.

Influence isn't everything.
A good speech isn't everything.
Influence and a good speech can get people killed.

Your peppermint breath
gonna choke him to death

I was given the wings to fly...
I ran away...
Right into trouble.
It seemed from the moment I stepped into the mobile suit,
trouble was my destiny.

Daddy watch your little black sheep run

My father was an idiot,
the garden variety innocent fool.
The kind that preaches to the opposition,
while they devise a Julius Caesar.

He's got knives in his back
every time he opens up

He said I have no faith.
I said faith in what?
He said I have to be strong in my beliefs.
I said he gave me nothing to believe in.

He said, "You gotta be strong if you wanna be a man."

My father brick by brick built a magnificent world of delusion.

Mr. I don't know how you can have sweet dreams

Free from my father's home,
his oppression,
the alliance doesn't seem so bad.
At least you expect them to lie.
Politicians lie...
Terrorists overthrow them...
At least we understand each other.

Land of liberty
We're run by a constipated man

Even the well meaning politicians are as stupid as father.
"Remember the past...
So you won't repeat the mistakes..."
And yet... and yet...
Mariemeia's endless waltz...

When you live in the past
You refuse to see
When your daughter comes home nine months pregnant

They spend so much time thinking about history
That they can't see the problems of today.
When the shit hits the fan,
everyone has a finger to point
everyone can place blame
but no one accepts it.

With five billion points of light
Gonna shine them on the face of your friends

We're all manipulated.
The soldiers fighting... who believe in the lie of glory.
The public hiding... who believe in the lie of peace.
The politicians lying... who believe in the lie of power.
But the bureaucracy...
they fuel the war...
they fund the war...
they profit off of the war...
because they believe in the truth of money.

They've got the Earth in a sling
They've got the world on her knees
They've even got your zipper
between their teeth

I guess, just like father,
we all need something to believe in.

Sweet Dreams

Even if it is a lie.
I went back to try to explain it to him.
He refused to listen.
His pride... my pride... damn pride!
He thought he knew everything,
thought pacifism was perfect,
but his lie didn't work.
He was betrayed.

You say you have 'em
I say that you're a liar

I told him exactly where he could put his lies,
then he could keep them for himself.
And I watched as his carefully constructed delusions
came crashing down around him.

Go on and dream.
Your house is on fire.

Time passes
As always

Well, well
summer wind been catchin' up with me

After that
I thought I'd be free...
But my thoughts ran side by side with fear
Never nearing a finish line.
Sleep become an ex-lover
Once adored,
Now scorned,
And always unattainable.
I was haunted.

"Elephant mind missy, you don't have
You're forgettin' to fly darlin' when you sleep"

I forgot lies, and dreams, and hope.
I knew only demons and regret.
And once again I faced my destiny: trouble.

I got hazy lazy susan
takin' turns all over my dreams

But as the dust settled,
And the nights remained restless,
And the battle raged within me,
I was able to point the accusing finger in the correct direction;
inward.

I got lizards and snakes
runnin' through my body
Funny how they all have my face.

To this day, I run,
From the lie that I always have,
Secretly hoping it will catch me.
We all need hope.

Sweet Dreams