Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Angel That Cried Crimson ❯ Alternate Ending: Promises of Hope ( Epilogue )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Standard Disclaimer: Shin Kidousenki Gundam Wing and its characters are copyrighted to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties




Standard Disclaimer: Shin Kidousenki Gundam Wing and its characters are copyrighted to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties. The characters of these works are used WITHOUT permission for the purpose of entertainment only. This work of fiction is not meant for sale or profit. I can assure you that if you sue me you will get about $40 bucks and a really cheap computer. Besides it would only be a waste of your time.
Warnings: ANGST!!!! This fic involves graphic depictions of self-mutilation and depression. If this sort of thing bothers you or makes you uncomfortable then please stop reading now. This is not a fic promoting self-mutilation because I have been there and it is not a fun thing to deal with. This is a fic about getting over it. Please, if this sort of thing bothers you DO NOT read any further!!!
~…~ Denotes thoughts
"…" Denotes dialogue
The Angel Who Cried Crimson
Epilogue 1
By: Marissa Kaisuke
~Epilogue 1~
Hours later, they were the only ones left in the waiting room. Duo half slept, leaning on Heero's shoulder. Wufei sat in a lotus position on the floor, meditating to calm his nerves while Trowa stared blankly out the window, watching the rain pour on the earth below.
"What time is it?"
"It's 1:35 in the morning. Five minutes later than last time. Tro, you need to sit down and try to get some sleep. You've been under a lot of stress and need to give your body some rest." Trowa kept his back to the Perfect Soldier.
"I'll rest when Quatre is safe and in my arms. Until they tell us he's okay, I'm not doing anything." Wufei opened one eye to study the tall European. ~ He's exhausted. I'm surprised he's lasted this long. Hell, I'm surprised any of us have lasted this long without collapsing from stress…~
"Mr. Chang?" Startled, the four pilots all reached for their guns, aiming with perfect accuracy at the surprised doctor. She froze in the doorway, dropping her clipboard. Realizing it was not the enemy, they quickly concealed the weapons. "You guys must all work for his Excellency, in the OZ organization." Heero balked at the foolish woman and silently cursed Wufei for bringing them to an OZ facility.
"Uh yeah, you could say we're soldiers. So how's Kat?" Duo gave the other three meaningful looks to keep up the charade till they had Quatre safe.
"Mr. Renwin is actually recovering in his room right now. He lost a lot of blood but we were able to pull him through. If you gentlemen would like to visit him one at a time then that would be fine." Duo whooped loudly, hugging Heero ecstatically.
"He's okay! YEAH!" Trowa sagged against the wall, tears of happiness running down his face. Wufei sighed in relief, thanking the gods for his friend's recovery. Heero hugged his lover back, laughing lightly.
"We won't be able to release him for quite some time, though, because we're going to keep him here under a 24-hour suicide watch for a few weeks till he is stable. Afterwards, we'll be putting him in a psychiatric ward till he is removed from his suicidal tendencies."
"Oh yeah, yeah…so where is he? Can we go see him now?" Duo pushed past the doctor, looking down the hallway. "Is his room this way?"
"Yes, go down the hall and turn right. Mr. Renwin's room is the fourth one on the left, number 4-3. Only one person in the room at a time, please."
"Can we all go in for just a minute? We'll make it short." Wufei gave his most convincing 'we're-really-tired-and-just-want-to-see-our-friend' look. She sighed softly, and smiled.
"If you all want to see him at once please make it brief. It's not hospital policy but I'll allow it this once."
"Thank you." Wufei bowed slightly and headed after the others down the hallway.
"Renwin? That's the name you came up with to give them? I could'a thought up somthin' better than Renwin!" Duo smirked at the Chinese pilot as he caught up to them.
"What? I just changed the letters around in Winner's name. I was in a hurry and my head wasn't clear at the time. Atleast I remembered to change his name. Last time, if I remember correctly Maxwell, we all had vacate the last safehouse because you told some pharmacist your real name when you went to get Trowa's flu medicine."
"Well at least I didn't check one of us into an OZ territory hospital. Geez Fei!"
"Hey! It was the closest and it was an emergency. The safest, neutral medical facility was over an hour away. If I called there he might have not made it."
"Quit bickering you two. We need to keep a low profile so it'll be easier to get out of here." Heero shushed the two pilots, gesturing for Trowa to open the door. Inside the bland, white room, machines hummed as they monitored the still figure on the bed. Trowa leaned over the side of the bed. Taking a slim, pale hand into his own, Trowa brushed a light kiss over Quatre's lips. The other three pilots discreetly looked away, giving him a moment of privacy.
"Want us to wait a minute outside?" Trowa shook his head, not looking up from Quatre's face.
"No, I want him out of here as soon as possible. Is he movable?" Heero turned and assessed the Arab's condition.
"His arm's are bandaged up pretty well. They can come off in a week or two. I'm positive he has stitches under there as well. I'm pretty sure I can take those out in a month, month and a half at the latest. Body temp is still low from blood loss, though." Heero watched the heart monitor for a moment and listened to the small blonde's chest. "He's breathing fine and he seems to be okay. They probably injected him with some sleep-inducing agent so he'll be out for a while. He looks movable to me. We should be able to get him out of here and home with no problems." Trowa carefully lifted Quatre's limp figure into his arms. Wrapping a sheet and blanket from the bed around him, Trowa waited till Wufei signaled the coast was clear to exit the room. Heero and Wufei took turns, waiting till there was no one in sight, to signal the European pilot to follow.
"Duo went ahead to bring the car around. Soon as we're outside get in the car as fast as you can so no one sees us. We're near an OZ base too apparently, so there's likely to be a few soldiers stationed here to watch over things." Trowa nodded, listening to the Wing pilot. Wufei stood outside the glass entry doors, waiting for the braided pilot to come around with the car. "Crap we've been spotted. C'mon babe! Where are you?" Heero spotted several doctors hurrying down the hall towards them. Duo pulled up and Wufei hopped in the passenger seat, motioning for the others to hurry. Bolting through the doors, Trowa and Heero leapt into the backseat, throwing the blonde pilot across their laps.
"GO DUO!" The braided pilot happily obliged, slamming his foot down on the accelerator and sending the small car screeching out of the parking lot.
****
Quatre shifted on the bed, bright sunshine hitting him in the face. ~ Bed? Sunshine? Where am I? What happened? ~ Groaning softly as he opened his eyes, Quatre was startled awake as azure gazed into emerald.
"Trowa?" Joy overcame the normally stoic pilot's face at seeing the small blonde awake. It had been two days since Quatre's attempted suicide and Trowa had made it a point to sleep in the chair next to Quatre's bed every night.
"Quatre! Oh thank god, you're awake!" Shock ran through Quatre's system as Trowa pulled him into a tight hug.
"What happened…OWW!"
"Oh, sorry." Trowa smiled sheepishly as let Quatre lie back down onto the soft pillows. "I forgot about your wounds. You okay?" Quatre tried to sit up, running a hand through his mussed bangs.
"Yeah, just really tired…and thirsty. Could I have some water?" Helping the Sandrock pilot sit up, Trowa ran out to the kitchen and filed up a glass of ice water. Passing the living room, Trowa let Duo and Heero know that Quatre was awake. Wufei was out in the yard practicing his kata's when the Deathscythe pilot bounced out there and filled him in on the good news. Trowa returned to the large bedroom with the water to see Heero giving Quatre a hug.
"Are you okay? How are you feeling?" Quatre looked astonished to all the attention he was getting. Handing him the glass, Trowa settled on the edge of the bed next to Quatre while Heero sat in the nearby chair.
"I guess I'm feeling okay. Why is everyone in my room? And why am I all bandaged up and tired? Did we have a mission and I just don't remember it or…"
"KAT-CHAN!!" Duo did a flying glomp onto the bed, his elbow landing squarely on Trowa's crotch.
"HOLY SHIT DUO!!!!!" Trowa gagged and clutched at the wounded area as he fell off the bed. Duo paused in mid-hug to peer over the side at the fallen pilot.
"Oops, sorry Tro. I'd kiss it and make it better but, Heero'd get jealous." Trowa groaned something unintelligible from the floor as Heero glowered at hie lover. Wufei walked into the room to Trowa on the floor, Duo practically all over Quatre trying to hide from Heero, and a madly blushing Quatre. ~ Yeah that's about right. ~ Wufei plucked the small blonde out of Duo's grasp as Heero launched himself at the braided boy. Quatre watched, astonished, as Heero grabbed Duo by the braid and forced a hot, wet kiss onto him. ~ THEY'RE GAY TOO!?!?!?! ~
"Get a room you two." Trowa said dryly as he managed enough strength to get off the floor. Wufei hugged Quatre briefly as he helped him back onto the bed. Quatre settled back into the soft pillows as the others all took seats around him.
"Why are you all watching me? Am I supposed to say something?" Heero sighed and pointed to Quatre's bandaged arm.
"Explain this and why you attempted suicide the other night. We had to rush you to the hospital or do you not remember?" Quatre's face went dead, emotionless as realization and vague memories hit him. He turned his head to the side not wanting to explain anything. Quatre looked back to face them as a warm hand took his.
"We only want to help you. Please we're your friends. Why did you do this to yourself?" Tears welled up in Quatre's eyes as he stared into Trowa's emerald green gaze.
"I…I…I hate myself so much…I absolutely hate myself…please, I don't want to talk about this…" Quatre broke down into quiet sobs as he covered his face with his sleeves. Trowa slid off the chair and sat down next to Quatre on the bed. Pulling the small blonde into his arms, Trowa hugged him to his chest tightly.
"Please, Quatre. We want to help you, not hurt you. None of us will judge you in any way, shape or form. I promise. Please…" Quatre basked in the warmth of Trowa's arms, drawing in the strength he needed from the soothing tone of Trowa's voice. Lifting his head up to look at them, Quatre began to speak.
"No one cares about me…no one loves me…I guess I hate myself because I'm always such a failure. I'm the weakest pilot amongst us all; I'm skinny, scrawny and fucking ugly in my opinion. I almost killed Trowa when I let the ZERO system get to me and he ended up missing with amnesia because of me. I almost blew up a colony too when I was under that thing. I'm worthless as a Gundam pilot and as a human. Hell I'm not even human. I was genetically created did you know that? Made in a fucking test-tube. I HATE MYSELF!!" Quatre screamed out and buried his face into Trowa's chest. Trowa rubbed Quatre's back, trying to offer what little comfort he could to the upset blonde.
"Quatre, you're not weak. By any stretch of the imagination. You were the one who kept me going after Heero self-destructed. I guess you never knew it at the time but, I was majorly depressed and you just being there helped me through it all. You really are one of my best friends Quatre and I don't want to see anything happen to you." Duo put a comforting hand on Quatre's shoulder. Wiping away the tears, Quatre smiled weakly at Duo.
"Thanks I guess but, you're just saying that to make me feel better. But I'm not worth it though. I'm completely worthless. I'm such a crybaby too. Look at me! None of you would break down like this and cry over everything. I'm so weak. I'm disgusting as well! My fucking family is ashamed of me! Do you know why!?!" Quatre's voice escalated as he shoved away from Trowa. Rage filled his voice as disgust and personal hatred shone in his eyes. "I'M GAY!! I'M FUCKING QUEER!!!! I'VE HAD DREAMS ABOUT FUCKING THE HELL OUT OF ALL OF YOU!! GOD I'M SO DISGUSTING!!" Quatre slumped down on the bed, exhausted from the emotional overload. "Out, just get out…all of you. I'm sure you're all thoroughly disgusted by now so just get out and leave me alone. God, I'm so worthless. I just wish you had let me die. WHY!? WHY COULDN'T YOU ALL HAVE JUST LET ME DIE!?!" Heero yanked Quatre around and pulled him to his chest. Crushing their lips together, Heero slid his tongue between parted lips and rubbed their hips together. The petite blonde moaned into the Perfect Soldier's mouth as Heero massaged his erection through satin pajama pants. Quatre felt bereft when the Wing pilot moved away, straightening his clothes.
"Quatre, we're all gay. All five of us, with the exemption of Wufei 'cause he's bi. Get over it. Duo and I've been screwing for months now. Even Wufei joined in at one point in time and we had an orgy so don't feel like you're the only non-hetero here." Quatre flopped down on the bed, touching his lips in amazement and pure shock. Duo glared at his lover.
"Hey! I couldn't kiss Trowa but you're free to make out with Kat? ASS! That's not fair." Heero shrugged.
"Got him to quit wallowing in self-hatred didn't it?" Trowa threw Heero a dirty look. ~ Dammit! I wanted to do that!! ~ Quatre still sat in shock on the edge of the bed. ~ God! I never thought a kiss could be like that! WOW! ~ Quatre snapped back into reality as Heero's words finally hit him.
"Wait a sec, you're all gay!! When did this happen?!?!" Wufei laughed at Quatre's confused look.
"Quatre we've always been non-hetero. We just never showed it 'cause we weren't sure if you were straight or not. We didn't want it to make you feel uncomfortable so, we just never said anything about it." Quatre leaned back onto the pillows again, taking in all this new information.
"Oh… wish I could have joined in on the orgy. Sounds kinky." The last two phrases were spoken so softly that only the taller European heard him. Trowa's eyes widened at the though of a five way orgy between all of them. ~ Nah! Better work him into it. It'll be best if we start off small…like just him and me. ~ Quatre yawned widely, his energy reserves running on low from all the stress and emotional overload. Duo and Heero took their cues and went out to make breakfast for the five of them.
"Don't worry Kat-chan. We'll all pull through this together. You're not a failure or weakling or…any other bad thing you think of yourself. Trust me, you're one of the best of us. Well, next to me of course." Heero snorted at Duo's last comment and pulled him out of the bedroom towards the kitchen. "We'll get breakfast made and bring it to you when it's done, k?"
"I'd better go help them. Duo can't cook worth shit and all Heero likes to make are Japanese dishes." Wufei got up to leave then turned in the doorway. "You really are hot Quatre. You know that right? Plus you've always been there for us when we needed you. You're not weak, no matter how much you think it's true." Wufei left the large bedroom, leaving Trowa still sitting on the bed.
"Do you feel any better?" Quatre looked up and smiled slightly as Trowa took his hand.
"Yeah, I guess. It's nice to know that I don't disgust you guys."
"You could never disgust us, Quatre. Even if we were all straight but you, no matter how homophobic we were, we could never hate you. Especially me." Quatre smiled up at the Heavyarms pilot.
"Thank you, Trowa. That means a lot to me knowing that I don't disgust you. Maybe I'm not that worthless but I'm still a crybaby. And weak. And I hurt you or did you forget about that!"
"Shut up! You are none of those things and you know it! I don't care what happened to me while I had amnesia. It wasn't your fault!! Those things happened because a computer system, that even Heero has trouble with sometimes, took control over you. It was my decision to jump in front of that beam. It was my decision to not get out of the cockpit when I knew it was going to explode."
"But you wouldn't have gotten hurt if I wasn't so weak as to overcome the system!"
"Dammit, Quatre! It wasn't your fault!! I don't blame you for any of that. Can't you understand that?" Quatre opened his mouth to protest but was cut off as Trowa kissed him roughly. Running his fingers through golden hair, Trowa devoured Quatre's mouth, running his tongue through every crevice in the hot, silky mouth beneath him. Quatre kissed him back, exploring the emerald-eyed pilot's velvety mouth and tongue, before settling back onto the pillows. Trowa kissed him softly on the lips before pulling back to gaze into azure eyes. "Do you know what the last thought on my mind was when the Vayeate exploded? It was for Heero to not be too hard on you. I wanted him to assure your safety before I died. I didn't die though. I drifted for a while and was picked up by a passing ship. Luckily I was dropped off on the colony where Catherine was. But the entire time I had no idea who I was, do you know what image stuck in my mind? It was when you and I played that duet together. You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. And when you first stepped out of your Gundam and showed me your face. I felt my heart stop. I love you Quatre." A small tear tracked its way down the European's face, splashing softly on the blonde's cheek. Quatre reached up and licked away another salty tear as it slid down porcelain skin.
"I love you too, Trowa. When you first surrendered to me that day, I surrendered my heart to you in return." Trowa pulled Quatre against his chest, reveling in the feeling that his love was returned.
"Quatre, promise me one thing though. No matter how bad you feel in the future, you'll never do this again. I couldn't bear to lose you. I lost you once but you found me again. I couldn't take the pain of losing you again."
"I promise, Trowa. I won't ever go this far again. I don't want the ones I love to be in pain."
"Thank you." Kissing his sweet, pliant lips again, Trowa didn't even notice Duo come back with a tray full of hot, fluffy pancakes.
"Breakfast is…oh! Uh, I'll just leave it on the table and you guys can eat when you finish." Duo smiled broadly as the two currently making out didn't even notice him. ~ Damn! From what Heero said, Kat's a pretty good kisser and from just seeing him and Trowa going at it, I can safely say that both of them are pretty good at it. Maybe Heero and Fei-chan will be up for another romp in the sack soon. I'm sure we could squeeze those two in somewhere. ~ Duo walked back towards the kitchen, evil, hentai thoughts racing through his mind.
"OOH! Just think of all the combinations!!"
~OWARI~