Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Black Queen ❯ Perfectly Crazy ( Chapter 8 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Violet_Nyte 
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological / Drama / Angst | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 12.14.2002 | Pages: 5 | Words: 2.1K | Visits: 306 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Gundam Wing Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological / Drama / Angst | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 12.14.2002 | Pages: 5 | Words: 2.1K | Visits: 306 | Status: Work In Progress
LSE // 12-11-02
(The Black Queen - Chapter Eight: Perfectly Crazy)
rated: PG13 - violence, language, content
shounen-ai/yaoi
Perfectly Crazy
Pain.
Why pain? I remove one hand from the gun and gently press against the
source of the pain. To my great surprise, there's a sticky wetness on
my side. I glance down to find myself looking at a bullet wound.
Strange, I don't remember getting shot.
I blink, feeling the slight ringing in my ears from gun reports. The
shot was just fired, then. I lift my eyes to find the blue-eyed man
staring at me in shock. His mouth is moving. He's yelling.
The gun is very heavy in my hand, so I let it fall. I watch,
transfixed, as the sleek metal weapon lands on the rug. There's blood
everywhere.
I turn my head slightly, seeing the door is open. A fierce looking
man is standing there holding a gun. Oh, so he shot me.
I fall forward, suddenly no longer able to stay upright. I kneel
there, staring at the pool of blood. My blood? I'm so tired. I start
to fall the rest of the way when hands gently stop my fall, lowering
me to the ground. I stare up into the blue eyes.
"Duo..." he whispers, and I realize.
I am Duo.
The blue eyes are the last thing I see as the darkness sweeps forward
and sucks me down into the floating realm of unconsciousness. When
it's too late to matter, I am able to place a name to the eyes.
Heero.
-------------------------------------------- --------------------------
"Heero, I am sorry, but perhaps this is best for everyone."
"You don't understand! When Duo wakes up he can tell you, he didn't
kill Amy or the maid. Relena, you have to trust..."
"He's been awake before, Heero. He didn't even know his own name he
was that far gone. Maybe that whore, Amy-whatever, said or did
something to provoke him and he just snapped. He was clinging to the
last thread of sanity anyways. He held a doctor at knife point to
escape from that hospital. At knife-point!"
"He was awake and no one told me?"
"He was perfectly crazy. The doctors gave him sedatives and pain
killers. Heero... Duo was the only one in the room. His finger prints
are all over that gun, and forensics can prove that it was the same
gun that killed both that girl and my maid."
"Duo is not like that, he..."
"He was going to kill you before Captain Aherns shot him first. You'll
be lucky is they don't try to make a capital murder charge, and with
his record, it will definitely stick. I really am sorry."
"Relena, I know it seems bad, but last time I thought the same thing,
and I was wrong."
"To think I would ever heard you admit to being wrong... It doesn't
change my mind. He's a danger and you'll be lucky if the worst that
happens is he gets sent back to the hospital."
"You don't..."
"But I do, Heero. I do understand. I understand the facts, and the
facts are Duo's simply unstable at best. Completely insane is a
middle ground, but I don't see psychotically blood thirsty as
unreasonable..."
"Relena..."
"I'm sorry, Heero."
The words swirl through my head, crumbling the carefully constructed
made by drugs. Yummy, drugs. From the feel of the sheets around me,
it's a hospital bed.
Oh, my god.
Amy is dead.
The maid is dead
They think I did it?
Holy shit, did I?
"Heero..."
The voices stop, the only sounds are those of the machines. I
reluctantly force my eyes to open, focusing on the pink jacket
Relena's wearing. She has wedged herself between Heero and the bed,
trying to keep him out.
"Heero," I say, a little louder. Demanding.
He brushes Relena aside, stepping up to the bed and looking down with
mingled emotions. I'm too tired to decipher them all. "Duo?" he asks.
Asks!
I force a smile, "Who else?"
Relief, I can see that. Something else. Fear?
Relena's furious, that's an easy one. She's looming behind Heero. The
Intensive Care Unit is dim, the only light that of the sad machines
and the weak fluorescent streaming in from the nurse's station. The
wall facing the hall and station is made of glass panels with the
curtains opens.
"I'll call my lawyer for you. Don't object; you'll need her if you
want to avoid the death penalty. I suppose you could plead insanity,"
she says coldly, nodding once to Heero before stalking out.
"Think she's angry," I mumble, still trying to reconcile my brain to
the idea of consciousness and the cognitive processes accompany the
said awareness. It doesn't like it. Wants more yummy Valium. Whee...
Heero looks down at me. I turn my head away as best I can, starting
to lift one hand to brush my bangs aside. My limbs refuse to operate
like the good little cooperative appendages they should be.
Oh, lord, I'm tied to the bed, my wrists and ankles bound with thick
leather straps. I'm tied to the bed. Tied - To - The- Bed.
"Shh," Heero murmurs suddenly, a cool hand laying on my forehead,
lifting back the bangs. I realize I'm whimpering and stop, relaxing
against the bindings. Heero strokes the side of my face slightly,
startling me with his kindness.
"There was nothing I could do," Heero says apologetically. "The
hospital pulled your record, the finger prints got them the files...
It's over."
"I know," I whisper, staring at a spot somewhere above Heero's head.
"Won't have to wear dresses anymore," I try to laugh, or even just
smile, but I can't.
It feels good, Heero's hand on my forehead. "Do you know what
happened?" he asks quietly.
Do I?
It's all so eerie in familiarity, but at the same time so very, very
different. I remember lying in another hospital bed, my arms just as
useless and the same gnawing shame; guilt, but this is different.
Heero isn't angry with me this time. I'm actually innocent, for the
most part, and I get the Heero believes in me, or just too scared of
the other Possibilities.
Woah, capital letter. Seriously.
"She's dead. Both."
Silence for a few moments. I'm thinking backwards, trying to piece it
all together. "Amy and I were talking. She'd taken my pills. Oh, I
never took them. Heero, Heero, I forgot to take my pills. I'm sorry."
Heero's voice is low, soft, shaking, "It's okay."
"I told her to give them back. My pills, back. Told her, 'cause I had
forgotten they were Duo's, not Helen's. Told her I was Duo, because
she knew me. From Nata. Sha. Asked her who was after Nata sha."
I stop talking, because I can't remember what comes next.
"Where did you get the gun?"
"I don't know. Heero, did I kill her? Them?" I stop staring at nothing
and focus in on Heero.
"You don't know?" slight surprise.
I shake me head, sadly. "I don't think I did, but I can't remember.
It goes blank after that. Why would I kill Amy, anyway? She was going
to help us."
Heero smoothes the hair off my forehead, not saying anything.
Tears prick behind my eyes, "Are they going to send me back to that
institution?"
Heero's eyes look at my sadly. They are blue. Blue? Why is that
important; I've always known Heero's eyes to be blue.
"Possibly," he says. Capital letter.
Grey. Grey walls, grey clothes, grey nurses, grey food. Solitary.
Heero's talking, telling me the bits I can't remember. Apparently he
burst in on me with the gun and the two dead women on the floor.
"You... you were pretty out of it. One of Relena's soldiers, guards,
shot you before I could do anything."
"Not your fault," I whisper. Heero nods, slightly.
I got shot. "How bad is...?"
"Not bad at all. You'll be fine, no damage. You're okay," Heero
answers quickly.
"How long? Have I been out?"
"Four days."
"Visiting hours are over," a nurse announces as she stroll sin,
bustling importantly. She looks at me warily, but I don't really
blame her. I am a psycho and accused murderer/kidnapper tied down to
the bed with nice, thick leather bands.
Whee.
Heero's hand leaves my forehead, which I do not like. "Can't... can't
he stay?" I ask, looking imploringly to the nurse.
"Rules and regulations," she replied. Her name is Bernice and has a
very Official Hospital Requirements enforcement look to her. She all
but chases Heero from the room before returning and moving swiftly
through her required route.
I don't really pay attention until she leans over with a needle and
jabs it into the crook of my elbow, on the opposite area as the IV.
"What's that?" I ask, trying to sound as un-crazy as Possible.
"Thorazine. To help you sleep. Now, go to sleep."
What the... Thorazine? That's serious stuff, I wonder...
Oh, wow.
------------------------------------------------------------- ---------
"Duo Maxwell."
Oh, but this nothing is addicting.
"Duo."
Never want to wake up, no worries, no problems. Yeah, Thorazine. It's
a drug, it's a shot, it's...super Thorazine!
"Duo Maxwell."
I open my eyes and plan to ask the person to kindly go away. Unless
it is a nurse, then I'll ask for more Thorazine. "Please go awake," I
mutter, seeing the absence of starch white nurse clothes.
"No. Open your eyes. Look at me."
Slowly, my eyes open fully and adjust to the dim light. The face
glows eerily from the machine's illumination. (Hallucination) I stare
for a few minutes, unable to comprehend. This can't be real. No way
can this be real. It has got to be the Thorazine, I know it. Yep,
Thorazine. Good shit, Thorazine.
"...Huh?" I whisper. Very article, Duo. Excellent job, now drool a
little and your dementia is complete!
She blinks, slowly, "Try to fight the drugs, Duo."
"But, you are dead. So very, very dead"
She smiles, "No, I am quite alive."
"I saw you die," my voice is loud compared to her faint whisper. "You
are dead," I repeat, the hard edge of hysteria creeping in. "Dead,
dead, dead, dead--"
A pillow smashes my face suddenly, muffling and destroying my frantic
chant. If I say it enough times, it'll be true and she won't haunt me
anymore. She lowers her face close to mine, leaning over the bed,
"Quiet! You must not alert the nurse to my presence."
Cautiously, she moves the pillow.
I whisper, "Amy, you're dead. But, if you are not, please go get the
nurse and explain to her that you are alive, and I didn't kill you.
Okay? Okay, Amy?"
She stares at me with that look I've grown use to seeing on Heero's
face. That shocked and stunned look that means I've said something
completely irrational and psychotic. It's that look that tells me
sanity left a long time ago and didn't leave a card.
Thorazine. It's the Thorazine. I'm hallucinating. I'm dreaming.
"I'm not Amy," she says carefully, that look in her eye.
I stare at her, still unable to piece it together. My brain, fogged by
the lovely pain killers and my beloved Thorazine, refuses to function.
Clear, blue eyes shine in the gloom. They're tilted at the ends, very
cat-like. Jaw-length black hair frames a pale face, shadows cast oddly
over her features by the lighting.
It can't be.
"Natasha?"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Author's Notes: Thank you, thank you so much for reviews!! *glomp*
The muses are content with the sacrifice and have once again blessed
me with their torture... I mean, inspiration. *hides from
spork-wielding muses*
I swear to you by the might of the Vanilla Coke I will have a
Christmas 'fic ready BEFORE Christmas! My goal is the twenty-first
because that's the first day of my Winter break &_&
Good thing is a have 2000+ words of a story already, I just need to
keep writing. So, looks like I'll have a Christmas gift for everyone.
^_^ yayness and happy sleeping kitties.
Got tired of the old closing info. format so I changed it. Yay.
Feedback/reviews are very much appreciated!
copyright 2002 - Gundam Wing and characters copyright other people.
Email me to join my Update ML!
LSE - Violet Nyte (ManzokuBiscuit@aol.com)
shameless plug - visit my website for cool "shtuff"
http://violetnyte.fallenweb.net
(The Black Queen - Chapter Eight: Perfectly Crazy)
rated: PG13 - violence, language, content
shounen-ai/yaoi
Perfectly Crazy
Pain.
Why pain? I remove one hand from the gun and gently press against the
source of the pain. To my great surprise, there's a sticky wetness on
my side. I glance down to find myself looking at a bullet wound.
Strange, I don't remember getting shot.
I blink, feeling the slight ringing in my ears from gun reports. The
shot was just fired, then. I lift my eyes to find the blue-eyed man
staring at me in shock. His mouth is moving. He's yelling.
The gun is very heavy in my hand, so I let it fall. I watch,
transfixed, as the sleek metal weapon lands on the rug. There's blood
everywhere.
I turn my head slightly, seeing the door is open. A fierce looking
man is standing there holding a gun. Oh, so he shot me.
I fall forward, suddenly no longer able to stay upright. I kneel
there, staring at the pool of blood. My blood? I'm so tired. I start
to fall the rest of the way when hands gently stop my fall, lowering
me to the ground. I stare up into the blue eyes.
"Duo..." he whispers, and I realize.
I am Duo.
The blue eyes are the last thing I see as the darkness sweeps forward
and sucks me down into the floating realm of unconsciousness. When
it's too late to matter, I am able to place a name to the eyes.
Heero.
-------------------------------------------- --------------------------
"Heero, I am sorry, but perhaps this is best for everyone."
"You don't understand! When Duo wakes up he can tell you, he didn't
kill Amy or the maid. Relena, you have to trust..."
"He's been awake before, Heero. He didn't even know his own name he
was that far gone. Maybe that whore, Amy-whatever, said or did
something to provoke him and he just snapped. He was clinging to the
last thread of sanity anyways. He held a doctor at knife point to
escape from that hospital. At knife-point!"
"He was awake and no one told me?"
"He was perfectly crazy. The doctors gave him sedatives and pain
killers. Heero... Duo was the only one in the room. His finger prints
are all over that gun, and forensics can prove that it was the same
gun that killed both that girl and my maid."
"Duo is not like that, he..."
"He was going to kill you before Captain Aherns shot him first. You'll
be lucky is they don't try to make a capital murder charge, and with
his record, it will definitely stick. I really am sorry."
"Relena, I know it seems bad, but last time I thought the same thing,
and I was wrong."
"To think I would ever heard you admit to being wrong... It doesn't
change my mind. He's a danger and you'll be lucky if the worst that
happens is he gets sent back to the hospital."
"You don't..."
"But I do, Heero. I do understand. I understand the facts, and the
facts are Duo's simply unstable at best. Completely insane is a
middle ground, but I don't see psychotically blood thirsty as
unreasonable..."
"Relena..."
"I'm sorry, Heero."
The words swirl through my head, crumbling the carefully constructed
made by drugs. Yummy, drugs. From the feel of the sheets around me,
it's a hospital bed.
Oh, my god.
Amy is dead.
The maid is dead
They think I did it?
Holy shit, did I?
"Heero..."
The voices stop, the only sounds are those of the machines. I
reluctantly force my eyes to open, focusing on the pink jacket
Relena's wearing. She has wedged herself between Heero and the bed,
trying to keep him out.
"Heero," I say, a little louder. Demanding.
He brushes Relena aside, stepping up to the bed and looking down with
mingled emotions. I'm too tired to decipher them all. "Duo?" he asks.
Asks!
I force a smile, "Who else?"
Relief, I can see that. Something else. Fear?
Relena's furious, that's an easy one. She's looming behind Heero. The
Intensive Care Unit is dim, the only light that of the sad machines
and the weak fluorescent streaming in from the nurse's station. The
wall facing the hall and station is made of glass panels with the
curtains opens.
"I'll call my lawyer for you. Don't object; you'll need her if you
want to avoid the death penalty. I suppose you could plead insanity,"
she says coldly, nodding once to Heero before stalking out.
"Think she's angry," I mumble, still trying to reconcile my brain to
the idea of consciousness and the cognitive processes accompany the
said awareness. It doesn't like it. Wants more yummy Valium. Whee...
Heero looks down at me. I turn my head away as best I can, starting
to lift one hand to brush my bangs aside. My limbs refuse to operate
like the good little cooperative appendages they should be.
Oh, lord, I'm tied to the bed, my wrists and ankles bound with thick
leather straps. I'm tied to the bed. Tied - To - The- Bed.
"Shh," Heero murmurs suddenly, a cool hand laying on my forehead,
lifting back the bangs. I realize I'm whimpering and stop, relaxing
against the bindings. Heero strokes the side of my face slightly,
startling me with his kindness.
"There was nothing I could do," Heero says apologetically. "The
hospital pulled your record, the finger prints got them the files...
It's over."
"I know," I whisper, staring at a spot somewhere above Heero's head.
"Won't have to wear dresses anymore," I try to laugh, or even just
smile, but I can't.
It feels good, Heero's hand on my forehead. "Do you know what
happened?" he asks quietly.
Do I?
It's all so eerie in familiarity, but at the same time so very, very
different. I remember lying in another hospital bed, my arms just as
useless and the same gnawing shame; guilt, but this is different.
Heero isn't angry with me this time. I'm actually innocent, for the
most part, and I get the Heero believes in me, or just too scared of
the other Possibilities.
Woah, capital letter. Seriously.
"She's dead. Both."
Silence for a few moments. I'm thinking backwards, trying to piece it
all together. "Amy and I were talking. She'd taken my pills. Oh, I
never took them. Heero, Heero, I forgot to take my pills. I'm sorry."
Heero's voice is low, soft, shaking, "It's okay."
"I told her to give them back. My pills, back. Told her, 'cause I had
forgotten they were Duo's, not Helen's. Told her I was Duo, because
she knew me. From Nata. Sha. Asked her who was after Nata sha."
I stop talking, because I can't remember what comes next.
"Where did you get the gun?"
"I don't know. Heero, did I kill her? Them?" I stop staring at nothing
and focus in on Heero.
"You don't know?" slight surprise.
I shake me head, sadly. "I don't think I did, but I can't remember.
It goes blank after that. Why would I kill Amy, anyway? She was going
to help us."
Heero smoothes the hair off my forehead, not saying anything.
Tears prick behind my eyes, "Are they going to send me back to that
institution?"
Heero's eyes look at my sadly. They are blue. Blue? Why is that
important; I've always known Heero's eyes to be blue.
"Possibly," he says. Capital letter.
Grey. Grey walls, grey clothes, grey nurses, grey food. Solitary.
Heero's talking, telling me the bits I can't remember. Apparently he
burst in on me with the gun and the two dead women on the floor.
"You... you were pretty out of it. One of Relena's soldiers, guards,
shot you before I could do anything."
"Not your fault," I whisper. Heero nods, slightly.
I got shot. "How bad is...?"
"Not bad at all. You'll be fine, no damage. You're okay," Heero
answers quickly.
"How long? Have I been out?"
"Four days."
"Visiting hours are over," a nurse announces as she stroll sin,
bustling importantly. She looks at me warily, but I don't really
blame her. I am a psycho and accused murderer/kidnapper tied down to
the bed with nice, thick leather bands.
Whee.
Heero's hand leaves my forehead, which I do not like. "Can't... can't
he stay?" I ask, looking imploringly to the nurse.
"Rules and regulations," she replied. Her name is Bernice and has a
very Official Hospital Requirements enforcement look to her. She all
but chases Heero from the room before returning and moving swiftly
through her required route.
I don't really pay attention until she leans over with a needle and
jabs it into the crook of my elbow, on the opposite area as the IV.
"What's that?" I ask, trying to sound as un-crazy as Possible.
"Thorazine. To help you sleep. Now, go to sleep."
What the... Thorazine? That's serious stuff, I wonder...
Oh, wow.
------------------------------------------------------------- ---------
"Duo Maxwell."
Oh, but this nothing is addicting.
"Duo."
Never want to wake up, no worries, no problems. Yeah, Thorazine. It's
a drug, it's a shot, it's...super Thorazine!
"Duo Maxwell."
I open my eyes and plan to ask the person to kindly go away. Unless
it is a nurse, then I'll ask for more Thorazine. "Please go awake," I
mutter, seeing the absence of starch white nurse clothes.
"No. Open your eyes. Look at me."
Slowly, my eyes open fully and adjust to the dim light. The face
glows eerily from the machine's illumination. (Hallucination) I stare
for a few minutes, unable to comprehend. This can't be real. No way
can this be real. It has got to be the Thorazine, I know it. Yep,
Thorazine. Good shit, Thorazine.
"...Huh?" I whisper. Very article, Duo. Excellent job, now drool a
little and your dementia is complete!
She blinks, slowly, "Try to fight the drugs, Duo."
"But, you are dead. So very, very dead"
She smiles, "No, I am quite alive."
"I saw you die," my voice is loud compared to her faint whisper. "You
are dead," I repeat, the hard edge of hysteria creeping in. "Dead,
dead, dead, dead--"
A pillow smashes my face suddenly, muffling and destroying my frantic
chant. If I say it enough times, it'll be true and she won't haunt me
anymore. She lowers her face close to mine, leaning over the bed,
"Quiet! You must not alert the nurse to my presence."
Cautiously, she moves the pillow.
I whisper, "Amy, you're dead. But, if you are not, please go get the
nurse and explain to her that you are alive, and I didn't kill you.
Okay? Okay, Amy?"
She stares at me with that look I've grown use to seeing on Heero's
face. That shocked and stunned look that means I've said something
completely irrational and psychotic. It's that look that tells me
sanity left a long time ago and didn't leave a card.
Thorazine. It's the Thorazine. I'm hallucinating. I'm dreaming.
"I'm not Amy," she says carefully, that look in her eye.
I stare at her, still unable to piece it together. My brain, fogged by
the lovely pain killers and my beloved Thorazine, refuses to function.
Clear, blue eyes shine in the gloom. They're tilted at the ends, very
cat-like. Jaw-length black hair frames a pale face, shadows cast oddly
over her features by the lighting.
It can't be.
"Natasha?"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Author's Notes: Thank you, thank you so much for reviews!! *glomp*
The muses are content with the sacrifice and have once again blessed
me with their torture... I mean, inspiration. *hides from
spork-wielding muses*
I swear to you by the might of the Vanilla Coke I will have a
Christmas 'fic ready BEFORE Christmas! My goal is the twenty-first
because that's the first day of my Winter break &_&
Good thing is a have 2000+ words of a story already, I just need to
keep writing. So, looks like I'll have a Christmas gift for everyone.
^_^ yayness and happy sleeping kitties.
Got tired of the old closing info. format so I changed it. Yay.
Feedback/reviews are very much appreciated!
copyright 2002 - Gundam Wing and characters copyright other people.
Email me to join my Update ML!
LSE - Violet Nyte (ManzokuBiscuit@aol.com)
shameless plug - visit my website for cool "shtuff"
http://violetnyte.fallenweb.net