Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Coward Within ❯ The Coward Within ( Chapter 1 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

The Coward Within

The light autumn breeze blew Dorothy's pale blonde hair behind her
like a long golden cape as she walked outside barefooted on the coarse
steppingstones to the garden, her light azure eyes sparkled with a
sudden burst of joy as she saw her love basting in the shadow of a
Japanese Maple tree reading a thick novel.

"Hello Relena-sama." Dorothy inquired as she walked passed Relena, the
darker blonde haired girl looked up with a shy smile.

"Hello Dorothy, your just the person I needed to see," She stated in a
polite diplomatic tone. "Please have a seat." Relena gestured with her
free hand as she spoke; Dorothy slowly approached the tree and sat
down beside the darker blonde.

"And what do you wish to talk to me about Relena-sama?" Asked Dorothy
in a low voice as Relena placed her book down on the grass, the darker
blonde smiled sweetly and lend against the Maple. Dorothy sighed
slightly and slid her arm around her love's waist.

"About us of course." Relena whispered into the other girl's ear, the
light blonde shuttered in pleasure.

"And what about us do you wish to discuss Relena-sama?" Dorothy
inquired as she stroked the darker blonde's hair; Relena lightly
kissed the lighter blonde's neck and pulled her closer.

"About how I want you every second of every waking day." Relena stated
as she gazed into Dorothy's brilliant blue eyes, Dorothy grinned and
slightly giggled as she nuzzled her love's shoulder.

"Mmm, I like to hear that Relena-sama," Dorothy cooed in a lust filled
tone as she wrapped her arms tightly around the slender girl she was
holding. Relena giggled half amused and half aroused. "Because I think
of you all the time, awake or not." Declared Dorothy as she lifted her
head off of Relena's shoulder and firmly kissed her on the lips, the
lighter blonde moaned softly as her love's tongue slid into her mouth.
The kiss lasted for a long while, reluctantly both girls pulled away
flushed and slightly panting as they locked eyes.

"Relena." A monotone voice called out as a dark figure came into view,
Relena jerked her head up and turned in the direction the voice was
coming from. A young man stood with a pistol in his right hand, his
dark brown hair ruffled slightly as the wind began to blow and his
cold emotionless eyes glared cruelly at the two girls. "I've finally
decided to keep my promise Relena; I'm going to kill you like you
always wanted me to." The gunman declared, his voice not changing in
the least as he slowly walked up to the two blondes. Dorothy's eyes
flared as she looked at the heartless man with the firearm.

"Leave her alone Heero Yuy! She doesn't want to die anymore, leave her
alone!" Screamed Dorothy as she stood up and shielded Relena with her
body, Heero gazed at her show of protection for the pacifistic blonde
girl.

"Dorothy. Move or I will kill you first and make her watch." The
Japanese Gundam pilot stated as he lips curved into a vile merciless
grin at the thought of Relena watching her lover die a slow painful
death. Dorothy gave the 01 pilot a fearless smirk as she stared into
him, cutting deeply into him but all she saw was pain and hatred
glinting in his soulless eyes.

"You can kill me Yuy but you'll never lay one hand on Relena-sama!"
The platinum blonde exclaimed as she held her ground. Heero's grin
vanished just as fast as it had appeared, his steady hand raised up
pointing the pistol at Dorothy's head, the lighter blonde gasped as
the Japanese pilot cocked the hammer of the gun.

"Mission accomplished." Heero declared as he pulled the trigger and
sent a bullet through Dorothy's forehead; a gush of grey-matter mix
with crimson flew through the air in a thick spray; painting the
ground and Relena in gore.

"Dorothy! Dorothy wake up! Come on Dorothy wake up, your having a
nightmare!" A husky voice called out from nowhere, the platinum blonde
stirred violently thrusting everything off of her hot sweaty body.
Suddenly Dorothy sat up panting heavily and visibly shaking, tears
hung on her cheeks and burned her pale azure eyes. The light-haired
blonde hid her pale face in her hands as a pair of small warm hands
patted her back comfortingly. "Are you okay Dorothy?" A soft polite
voice asked as Dorothy shook the dream from her head; the light-haired
blonde trembled as she recognized the speaker although she couldn't
see the person.

"Relena-sama...I...I'm...fine, I...just had a bad-dream...that's all."
Dorothy stuttered horribly as she spoke. She is in my room, on my bed;
oh gods tell me this isn't a dream! The blonde asked herself as her
eyes focused on the other girl. Relena gently patted Dorothy's back
trying to calm her.

"Dorothy this is the fifth nightmare in a week, I'm getting worried
about you, are you sure your okay?" The polite pacifistic girl
inquired in a low tired voice. Dorothy realized she must have been
screaming in her sleep again.

"Relena-sama, I'm sorry that I woke you up with m...my stupid
nightmares." Apologized the still shaken Dorothy, Relena smiled into
the darkness and placed her hand on the other girl's left shoulder.

"Dorothy there is no need to apologize to me, you didn't wake me. I
can't sleep well lately with the war going on, so please don't think
I'm up because of your screaming." Relena said in a calm tone, Dorothy
sighed a little, then tensed up again as the darker-haired blonde bent
forward and looked deeply into her eyes.

"R...Relena-sama I'm fine, really. Please don't worry about me; there
is no need to care about my silly night horrors. You on the other hand
should try to sleep, you have a meeting with the ambassadors of L2
tomorrow morning." Declared the platinum blonde as she felt heat rise
to her cheeks, Relena smiled weakly.

"Dorothy, it's the same dream every time isn't it?" Relena asked as
her voice took a new tone unknown to Dorothy's ears. All the blonde
could do was nod slowly, Relena sighed slight and pulled back a little
as she realized Dorothy was uncomfortable being that close. "I thought
so," Stated the sandy-haired blonde. "Dorothy please tell what its
about, I'm sure that would help you some."

"Relena-sama, I've told you very night for the past four nights I
don't remember what its about." Dorothy choked on her own lie as she
said it, Relena sighed again.

"Are you sure you just don't want to remember it, or are you hiding
something from me Miss Catalonia?" Relena inquired although she knew
Dorothy would only deny remembering her dream. What is she hiding from
me? Relena asked herself as she looked at Dorothy's brow furrow in
though. She is trying to put her mask back on before I see her for
whom she is, why does she hide this side from me? Gods Dorothy, stop
running from your true self! Relena continued to pry into her own
thoughts for a moment. Suddenly the fairer-haired blonde gazed at
Relena and smirked.

"My dream, it always started out lovely. Then Heero kills me. Is that
what you wanted to hear?" Dorothy asked with a trimmer of pain her in
words, yet it was well hidden in her sarcastic cheerful tone. The
pacifistic blonde blinked in shock unable to speak for a long moment.
Then Dorothy continued with her telling her dream. "You are there in
my dream Relena-sama, we're talking then in the middle of a lovely
conversation Heero walks up to us and I quote `I've finally decided to
keep my promise Relena; I'm going to kill you like you always wanted
me to.' Then I defend you, and because of it Heero blows my brains out
with a pistol." Explained the blonde girl, Relena looked at her with a
bit of shock in her eyes.

"You...you...died because you were protecting me?" Asked the
sandy-haired blonde, Dorothy only nodded. Relena suddenly smiled.
"Thank you Dorothy...and I'm sorry that you keep having those
nightmares because of me..." Relena was softly cutoff.

"Relena-sama, when I wake up I'm not scared because I die, I'm scared
because I don't know if your alive or not. I hate those types of
dreams that don't give me any closure." Dorothy muttered softly yet
with a firm sincerity that made Relena know she wasn't lying.

"Dorothy...that's...sweet." Relena said barely above a whisper,
Dorothy made no attempt to rephrase what she had let slip out, but
instead patted Relena's shoulder. The darker-haired blonde pulled
Dorothy into a light hug that was slightly warm and comforting to both
girls.

"Relena-sama, its very late perhaps we both should try and get some
sleep now." Suggested the fairer-haired blonde tiredly, Relena smiled
softly and nodded. "Umm...Relena-sama...thank you for listening to my
dream it does help to talk to someone about those sort of things."
Dorothy managed to mutter out before Relena stood up and began to walk
towards the door. Relena turned around and smiled sweetly.

"Anytime Dorothy, anytime." She said as she bent forward and lightly
kissed Dorothy's forehead, the blonde girl grew bright red as a dark
blush instantly spread across her pale cheeks. "Goodnight Dorothy."
Relena stated as she walked out of her friend's bedroom and closed the
door silently behind her. The fairer-haired blonde blinked for a long
while as if to make sure she wasn't dreaming, a wide smile inched its
way across her face as she lied down and slowly drifted to sleep.

A sudden blast from her alarm clock jolted Dorothy wake, making her
head throb immensely as she threw her blankets off of herself and
staggered out of bed.

"For Gods sakes why do I get up this early?" Dorothy chastised herself
for being a late to bed early to rise kind of person, but getting up a
little early was worth being able to eat breakfast with Relena.
Dorothy quickly took a shower then dressed, putting on her special
Sunday outfit. Which consisted of a pale-blue silk blouse and a
matching skirt with grey knee-high socks, Dorothy looked at herself in
the mirror and grinned slyly. Slowly Dorothy walked out of her
bedroom, her stomach fluttered slightly and was beginning to knot into
a tight ball as she walked into the dinning hall. Relena was sitting
on the long end of the rectangle dinning table, busy reading new
battle reports. Her personal bodyguard, Hilde Schbeiker, was seated
beside her drinking a cup of strong German coffee. Dorothy's blue eyes
twitched slightly as she looked at the short German girl sitting
beside Relena, but she shook the fit of jealousy off as she sat down
across from the sandy-haired blonde.

"Good morning Dorothy." Relena stated as she continued to read the
files in her hands, the paler-haired blonde brushed her bangs out of
her face.

"Good morning Relena-sama, Miss Schbeiker." Dorothy declared as she
poured herself a glass of orange juice and stared blankly at the table
for a moment. Slowly Relena looked up from the battle reports and
closed her violet eyes, rubbing her temples with the tips of her
fingers. Hilde set her coffee down and cleared her throat.

"Miss Darlian, are you alright?" The short dark-haired girl asked as
she looked at Relena, the sandy-haired blonde shook her head.

"Its nothing that a few aspirin won't cure." Relena stated as she
pulled a bottle of extra strength aspirin out of her coat pocket, the
German girl nodded and resumed drinking her coffee. Quietly Dorothy
sipped her juice as one of the Darlian house-servants placed a plate
in front of her.

"Enjoy your breakfast Miss Catalonia." Said the servant as he walked
away, the platinum blonde scowled at the food; three strips of bacon,
two eggs over-easy, and four triangle shaped pieces of wheat toast.
Suddenly Dorothy's stomach turned, the sour taste of bile filled her
mouth but she refused to let herself get sick. Instead the platinum
blonde drank her glass of orange juice and pushed her plate over to
her left slightly. Relena frowned slightly as she toyed with her own
breakfast, crushing her bacon, eggs, and toast into a singular blob of
mush. Dorothy squirmed in her chair before she broke the silence.

"Relena-sama, whatever the breakfast did I'm sure its sorry by now."
The fairer-haired girl declared in a serious tone, Relena looked at
Dorothy with an eyebrow raised then suddenly giggled as she looked
down at her plate.

"Oh, I'm sure it is. By the way what was it?" Relena inquired as she
poked at the un-recognizable substance in front of her, Dorothy
giggled slightly.

"Last time I checked it was bacon, eggs, and toast. But somehow I
think its DNA combined to form whatever that lump of mush is on your
plate." Dorothy stated as she nodded seriously, Relena laughed
whole-heartedly at the bad joke.

Suddenly a tall man dressed in a grey uniform interrupted the two
girls slight amusements.

"Miss Darlian, your eight o' clock is here. Do you wish to let them in
or would you rather see them in your office?" Asked the officer as he
saluted Relena, the sandy-haired blonde sighed slightly.

"Let them in." She said as she pushed her plate away and sat up
straight, Dorothy sighed and rolled her eyes as she heard a
high-pitched voice speak from behind her.

"Good morning Miss Relena, how are you today?" Inquired an all too
familiar voice, Relena forced a smile.

"I'm doing fine Quatre, how is everything going?" Relena began the
small talk until the other Gundam pilots arrived; the blonde Arabian
brushed back his bangs as he took a seat.

"Everything is well under the circumstances, I think we both can agree
with that." Quatre stated in an almost cheerful tone, Relena nodded
slowly as three more figures walked into the room.

"Relena." A heavily banged brunette said as he sat down, Relena smiled
at Trowa and looked at the third boy who sat down with out saying a
word. Heero only looked up at the blonde girl and bowed his head,
Relena returned the gesture and looked for the last of the Gundam
pilot who was coming.

"Hey Relena!" Duo shouted in a happy voice. "Hope I didn't miss
breakfast." He stated as she looked at Dorothy's untouched plate.
"Bacon!" Exclaimed Duo as he snatched a strip off of Dorothy's plate
and shoved it into his mouth, the platinum blonde shot him a cold
glance and pushed the plate closer to him.

"By all means help yourself Mr. Maxwell." Dorothy declared as she
gritted her teeth. Can't they wait until after she is done with her
breakfast? Just look at her she is getting so thin and sickly looking.
And now they're going to talk about the meaningless war! They're so
damn inconsiderate about her needs! Dorothy complained to herself as
she balled her fist under the table.

"Thanks Dorothy!" Duo mumbled as he dug into the food, Hilde muttered
a few curses under her breath as she watched the braided-haired boy
rudely consume Dorothy's breakfast for her. Relena cleared her throat
and began to start the meeting.

"Umm, Miss Relena?" Quatre cut in before she had began, his eyes
motioned over to Dorothy questionably; Relena frowned. Slowly Heero
looked over to the fairer-haired blonde, his Prussian blue eyes
cruelly cut deep into her as he spoke.

"To coexist with are enemies is one thing, but to befriend our enemies
and let them sit amongst us is asking for our purpose to cease to
exist." Declared Heero as his monotone voice shattered Dorothy to the
core, the fairer-haired blonde smirked at the remark despite the pain
it caused her. Heero turned away and looked at Relena, the
sandy-haired blonde nodded but before she could politely ask Dorothy
to leave; the platinum blonde stood up and slammed her fist onto the
table.

"Fine! I'll leave you selfish cold-hearted bastards! I just hope all
of you realize how pointless this damn war is! I hope all of you
realize how pointless it is to abuse Relena-sama like you do, but none
of you care about that do you?! Of course not, because the only thing
you see is the flare of the battlefield, you don't see how hard it is
for Relena-sama to keep everything together! None of you see your
slowly killing her! I hope all of you Gundam pilots rot in hell!"
Dorothy screamed as loudly as she could then ran out of the dinning
hall, the room was silent in utter shock as the blonde ran from the
room. Slowly a piece of toast dropped out of Duo's mouth.

"Maybe we should have let her stayed." He said out-loud, everyone
stared blankly at Duo. "What?" The braided-haired boy yipped out in
defense.

Dorothy stumbled up the stairs as she ran, her long blonde hair
whipped behind her violently as she sprinted down the hall and into
her room.

He did that on purpose! Damn you Heero, you know I hate you that's why
you did that to me! You knew I would blow up, damn you! She screamed
to herself as she fell onto her bed forcing herself not to cry, she
couldn't let herself cry not over that. Slowly Dorothy looked around
her room, she knew what she must do; Dorothy knew the only way not to
face Relena was to leave before she had a chance to talk to her about
her sudden out burst. Quickly Dorothy stood and began to through
clothes into a suitcase, her eyes burned slightly as she looked at a
picture of Relena and herself; only when a drop of liquid splashed
onto the frame did she realize she was crying.

"Weakling! Stupid lovesick weakling!" She yelled out-loud as she
carefully placed the picture in the suitcase and dried her eyes, but
the tears only flowed faster. After a few moments Dorothy was finished
packing, her eyes stung as she pulled a piece of paper out of her desk
and wrote a letter to Relena.

Dear Relena-sama:

All I wish to tell you with this letter is that I love you and I will
always love you, it pains me so much to watch you get hurt over Mr.
Yuy and the time has come for me to leave. There is no point in
staying, you love him and I am the enemy in every ones eyes; even
yours. So I am leaving, I apologize for my rude outburst at the
breakfast table, I just couldn't stand him telling you that I would
hurt you, that I would jeopardize your mission to achieve peace. All
I've ever wanted is to see your dream of absolute pacifism come true.

With love,

Dorothy Catalonia

The letter was slightly wrinkled and smudged from the platinum
blonde's tears, carefully Dorothy placed the letter on her desk in
plain view as she turned and grabbed her suitcase. Quietly, Dorothy
ran down the steppes and through the hallways; slowly making her way
to the back of the house where her yellow Cadillac was. In seconds
Dorothy had pulled out of the Darlian estate and raced down the road
at high speeds, never looking back.