Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Creed Arc ❯ The Creed: Received ( Chapter 10 )

-Received-

We stayed in that safe house a week. Seven short days of finding myself. Seven days of sitting in that window box and watching the sky move. Seven days of listening to them, of hearing their stories, and allowing my own to be heard. Seven days of letting them touch me, and touching them in return. Seven days of finally being received and knowing it wasn't the mask they were welcoming home, but me.

Then it was time to meet the others. Trowa and Quatre, all five of us once again under one roof. It was not something I was looking forward to, all the doubts I have always harboured, and all the broken rules I had once lived my life by standing between me and them. It was a wall I feared I could not climb, and in my heart perhaps did not want to. Why? What is on the other side of the wall? Do you have any idea? I don't. I only know it is unknown, and that the unknown kills as quickly as I do with much less remorse.

A hand on my shoulder. It's Wufei. Too light to be Heero. I turn into the touch, nuzzling my cheek against his palm. Those baby-soft palms.

"Nervous?" That, Wufei, is a very stupid question. See me nodding? Yes, you knew I was nervous so why ask? What are you getting at? Stop beating the bush, it's tired.

"Want to talk about it?" Hell no! God yes! I don't know. I'm not used to talking, to telling you what's wrong. I don't want to make you sad. It hurts when I do.

"What if they don't like me?" So much fear in my stupid little voice. So much…trepidation. If only Oz knew I was such a coward, they might actually put up a fight.

"Duo…" Why do you always kneel beside me when we talk Wufei? I like it, but why do you do it? Is it because you are used to talking to e from that level? Because you can't talk down at me? I hope so. I like it so.

"How much of what they know me for is the mask, and how much of it is…me?"

Heero's in the doorway. He heard; I know he did. It doesn't matter. You would have told him eventually anyway, right Wufei? No secrets. No masks.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" No Wufei. I don't think I am. Care to explain?

Wufei put his hand over my heart and pressed gently on my chest. I could feel his own pulse through his fingertips, a counterpoint to my own.

"Quatre has always known you, and through him Trowa knows you. You cannot hide what is inside you. When you hurt, Quatre hurts. When you are happy, Quatre is happy. The mask…it wasn't all fake Duo. Part of it is you. Part of you was happy all those times, even while part of you was not. Quatre loves all of you. Trowa too. Heero loves all of you. I love all of you. There have never been any masks on our hearts."

I cried. How couldn't I? How much of my life, of my thoughts and dreams had been me lying to myself? How much had I not seen, not had the pleasure to experience, because I wouldn't let myself see it? I found myself sandwiched between the two, and nothing had ever felt more right. How long had I pushed them away? How long had I forced them to stay at arm's length? For how long had they wanted more and known I wanted it too?

"But what if…you die…"

It was the question at the core of all things. I had seen how it happened. I had seen what happened after. It was the one inescapable truth of life. The one thing all life had in common. And I brought it to them.

"Then you go on, and you keep making people happy knowing you made us happy. You don't bring death Duo. Death simply is. You bring quality of life. You bring happiness. And one day, when you're old and grey and sitting on some back porch it won't matter who's sitting next to you, because you'll have a head full of memories of people you loved. People who were happy, if only for a moment, because they met you."

I wasn't sure what to say. I'd heard Heero give speeches before, but this was…different. This was for me. And it was said in that same manner that is so completely Heero; the one that brooks no argument. The one you know means every word is true.

"And that's enough?"

They smiled. They shared one of those looks I love so much. The kind that is excitement and lust and exhilaration and love all at once. The kind that says `hell yes' and forgets all the rest.

Wufei swept an escaped lock of hair behind my ear and kissed my neck.

"For this life, yes." He whispered in my ear, breath whispering its way to caress my brain.

So we went home. To a place where all five of us could stay, if only for a little while, together. It was a quaint little place, nothing like I had been expecting. A cottage in a deep wood, I imagined springs haunted by sprites and circles of fairy mushrooms. It was a dream, surely. Yet it was a dream I was willing to believe was real, and I intended to explore it. The only ceiling I knew was the sky.

Hiding the Gundams was easy in the thick foliage. As I hit the ground and looked up at my buddy I felt tears rising again. There was Deathscythe, nestled between his two brothers, Wing and Nataku, looking for all the world like that was where he belonged. It seemed we had both found a semblance of peace.

The door to the cottage was open and the strangest smell wafted to meet us. Odd. I was expecting a bundle of Quatre not a puff of steam. Must have been one of those middle eastern things. I remember Aladdin.

Heero and Wufei didn't quite understand what I found so funny when Quatre finally came rushing out the door dressed in the baggiest traditional pants I had ever seen. It's just one of those things.

"Heya Aladdin," I whispered in Quatre's ear, letting my heart open to him fully for the first time. When I placed him back on the ground before me there were tears in his eyes. I almost panicked, but I was used to these tears; tears of happiness.

"Duo…" Such wonder in your voice. What had your space heart told you all those times I locked myself away? What had you seen and what had I kept hidden? If only I could take it all back.

"Welcome home, beautiful nymph." He laughed happily, flicking my nose. I gaped. Who wouldn't? Quatre had just called me a….a…but then, I had called him Aladdin! Laughing heartily, I went arm in arm with him to the kitchen where Trowa was slaving over the biggest damn dinner I had ever seen. Literally, I had never seen that much food on one table my whole life, even when they were feeding a whole orphanage of kids!

But the defining moment? Was when Trowa turned to look at me. He started at the top of my head and his eyes went down. He even flicked the hair away from his face so he could look with two eyes. Those green orbs went all the way to my feet and back up before finally looking straight at me. I mean at ME. And he nodded, a smile twitching his lips as he said one word.

"Duo."

And he turned around and kept cooking.

I was…happy. Genuinely, irrecoverably happy. I sat between Heero and Wufei, aware of their thighs pressed hard against either side of mine as we all sat down to eat. I ate more than I should have, just to let them see me eat, and drink, and the smile never left my face. I didn't force it. It just was.

They were right, Heero and Wufei. Sister Helen and Solo. All of them. The Creed was short, but its long enough for this life. And, you know what? I think when I get to the next life I won't even bother to change it.

No masks, no lies, no hiding, no running. Just happiness in all its forms. I was finally Received.

Owari.

Well, that's it. Hope you all liked it and if you did, please leave a short note to tell me why. Always helps when I go to write the next fic. Thanks to everyone who stuck with it. I know it's surreal, I know it probably annoyed the hell out of you, but it was a fun ride and I'm glad you endured it with me. Special thanks to Arithkenshin who is still wading through it as my BETA, and to Golden Rat, who was always one of the first to review with a short but honest response. I hope you hang around to red more of my stuff, but if you don't, kkls, Leth.