Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Hoobastank Conspiracy Arc #1: Remember Me ❯ One-Shot

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Author: Kentra Shinataku
Pairings: 1x2, 2+5+2
Archive: http://www.deathandpassion.cjb.net, anyone else who wants it, e-mail me first.
Category: Angst, Romance
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: None
Warnings: NCS, post-war setting, major Heero-bastardization
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the songs by Hoobastank, or Gundam Wing, or basically anything but my notebooks and pens and computer.

Thanks to my hard-workin' beta, Abi, who deserves lots of credit because I'm constantly hasslin' her ::grins sheepishly::

~lyrics~
~/flashbacks/~
//thoughts//
_emp hasis_
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The Hoobastank Conspiracy Arc #1
Remember Me


~I stand here face to face,
With someone that I used to know,
He used to look at me and laugh,
But now he claims that he's known me
for so very long,
But I remember being no one...~

He's looking at me again, from across the booth, staring at me as if I owe him something. I can't believe that he wants my sympathy after treating my like I was nothing. Apologies won't help; not like he's offered them anyways. The great and wonderful Heero Yuy, Mr. Considerate, lower his pride? I don't see _that_ happening anytime soon. I used to think he was perfect for me, but obviously nobody is good enough for the Perfect Soldier. Now that he's got nothing left, he's trying to take from me what I laid before him so long ago. Too bad that he was too late.

~/Duo stared at the unruly haired figure from across the kitchen as the lightening lit up the outside window for an elusive moment. Hadn't the past week meant anything to Heero?

"You're actually just going to _leave_?" Duo inquired with disbelief. Heero looked directly into his eyes, the usually intensified steel gaze uncharacteristically dull.

"Yes."

"Don't you have a caring bone in your fucking body? You know how much I love you," Duo pleaded.

"I _can't_ love you. We're in a war, Duo," he returned tonelessly.

"Right. You just keep playing _perfect soldier_, bastard," Duo shot back icily.

Heero stepped through the partially opened door, letting some of the rain spatter onto the kitchen floor before he disappeared into the rainy, dark night, right after giving Duo a suave smirk. The slam of the door sounded the same time as a fresh bout of thunder rolled, and the image burned into Duo's mind, leaving an irreplaceable scar./~

He never cared about me, not really, that's obvious. Sometimes he pretended that he loved me, pretended that he needed me, but he only needed me long enough to get what he wanted. What hurt the most was how he treated me afterwards, how he left my bedroom in the morning calling me his 'little whore', how he pretended nothing had happened between us, how he left me writhing in my bed of tears and tangled sheets.

He always expected me to keep coming back to him, to keep feeding his desires, and like the fool I was, I succumbed to his will. I was too blinded by my feelings for him to understand. It wasn't that I thought he loved me, or even that I didn't care that he didn't, I was just lost. I _knew_ that he didn't love me. I knew that he was hurting me. But the other guys weren't as blind as I kept myself. Heero thought that they couldn't see, or maybe he just didn't care. How could they _not_ see what he was putting me through? After I started trying to resist him, he made his dominance over me very apparent by the marks he left on my skin.

~I wanted to be just like you,
So perfect, so untouchable,
Now you want me to be with you,
Someone who used to have it all...~

And I still loved him. For some crazy reason, my heart couldn't let go of him. Whenever he wanted me, my heart was loyal to him, my body kept returning to him almost willingly. Almost. But not quite. It seems my mind was the only part of me that had any sense... but all that earned me was more pain.

~/Duo sat on the window seat, legs hugged tightly to his chest as he stared at the stars above him. The night held such tranquility and beauty for him, he couldn't resist giving himself over to the darkness, letting the midnight air breeze through his unbound hair. But something was suddenly there that shouldn't have been. Duo whipped his head around instantly as he noted the light breathing behind him. The starlight gazing through the window wasn't enough to penetrate the shadows, where a strong, nearly silent figure was waiting. But who else could it be? Duo was well aware of who the shadow in the doorway was, even before he stepped towards him, with lust glistening in his eyes. Duo's heart leapt in a combination of fear and arousal; there was only one thing that Heero Yuy was in his bedroom for at such an hour.

Heero pressed his body against Duo's, forcefully preventing the other from leaving his arms with the firm grasp around his waist, and laced the fingers of one hand into the unbraided hair that Duo had untied for the night. He gave it a sharp tug and crushed his mouth into Duo's, ravishing his mouth forcefully with his slick, wet tongue. Heero pulled his hair again, much harder this time and Duo yelped into his mouth. Heero growled and pulled his lips away.

"Why'd you leave your god damn hair down?" he demanded.

"I-I wasn't expecting you," Duo stammered.

"I thought I told you not to keep it down. You're lucky I haven't cut it."

Duo's sapphire eyes intensified, accompanied by the fear that assailed him at the mere suggestion and he struggled to free himself from Heero's grasp. He failed the attempt, however. He was no where near as strong as Heero. Suddenly, he released Duo and shoved him against the wall, sending waves of pain shooting through his back and shoulders.

"As much as I love to feel you squirm, you've got to fix your hair. Rebraid it, hurry up," Heero commanded. The pleading look in Duo's eyes went ignored as he quickly began to construct his strands into a sloppy braid, snapping a rubber band from his wrist and onto the tail of his braid to secure it. He made sure he wrapped the band an extra time, so not one piece of hair would come loose. Practically the moment he finished, Heero was on him again, ripping Duo's shirt from him and trapping him between the wall and his own heated body.

Duo gave up trying to free himself when he felt Heero's groin pressing into his own, rubbing him until his own erection could not be denied. Heero smirked as he felt Duo's reaction and leaned so that his lips brushed against his ear.

"I knew that you wanted me," he whispered huskily before attaching his teeth to Duo's earlobe.

"I.. nn.." Duo was torn by the sensation of Heero's tongue traveling down his neck, trailing lower to his chest, and locating a hard nipple. Heero's left hand kept Duo pinned to the wall by his shoulder and his right tightly gripping the boy's waist as he relentlessly assaulted him with his tongue, leaving Duo writhing in defenseless arousal. He reached down and unzipped Duo's pants, pulling them and his boxers down and letting them rest on the floor at his feet, and wrapped his fingers around his throbbing erection. Duo cried out, attempting to thrust into Heero's hand, but he held him fast and allowed him no pleasure. With one hand around Duo's cock, he released Duo's shoulders and removed his own pants. Heero placed both hands on the other boy's shoulders and lowered him into an uncomfortable position on the floor, his back forced straight against the wall and spreading his legs as wide as they would go. The position pained his entire body, but he knew that was what Heero desired, and Duo was too aroused by submitting to Heero's power to resist. Heero grinned, almost evilly, as he saw that the braided slave in front of him made no motion to escape.

He slid his body against Duo's, and curled his legs around Duo's spread thighs, drawing him closer to the heat that his own aching erection was longing for. Duo's eyes widened as he realized the pain he was due for, and screamed as Heero snapped his hips forward, plunging his cock inside, no preparation or lubrication. But it wasn't the first time, and his scream only encouraged Heero further. He thrust into Duo furiously, slamming into the sweet spot inside each time as Duo slipped into a world of pleasured pain tainted with blood-covered guilt. Duo's back scraped hard against the wall until he felt Heero climax, spraying his seed inside him, filling him as he reached his own climax. Heero stood up, staring at Duo in disgust as he pulled his pants back on. Throwing Duo's clothing in his face, he scowled and left the room wordlessly, leaving Duo with nothing but guilt./~

He's glaring at me now, and I'm glad we're in a public place instead of the privacy of my bedroom. He can't do anything to me here, I know that, but just for reassurance I move closer to Wufei. He won't let Heero touch me. He knows what he's done to me... at least some of it. We've never really talked about it, but he knows that I fear him; I don't think we need to talk about it. Maybe I'm just not ready.

Wufei wraps a comforting arm around me, allowing me the reassuring feeling that I have somewhere I belong. Maybe he understands that's what I need. Heero's eyes light up in hate at the simple motion that Wufei uses to comfort me, and I shrink farther into my lover's arms to avoid the feeling of those steel eyes undressing me. That feeling is so familiar, so disturbing, so disgusting. I hate it. I hate _him_ for doing this to me, for making me live in so much fear. But there's a part of me that regrets denying him, that feels the burning of his toned body against mine day after day. There's a part of me that lived only in the thrill of passion he sent ripping through me.

I want that part of me to die, and only Wufei can help me kill it.

Heero has moved on to Trowa now, I think, but there's no denying he still wants me. The lust in his eyes scares the shit out of me sometimes, just like it is now. Why does he have to stare at me like this? I hate him!

He stands up and walks around to the other side of the booth where I am seated and it's all I can do not to crawl inside Wufei's skin.

"Want to dance, Duo?" he asks with that glint in his eye. Oh no, hell no, don't let him hurt me anymore!

"No thanks, Heero," I brush off coolly, wishing against logic that he would just disappear, taking those burning eyes and his raging libido with him. Dammit, why can't he leave me alone?

"Come on, Duo, you haven't dance all night," Quatre encourages. I know he doesn't understand what Heero has done to me, but why can't he keep his mouth shut?

"Right, not like you at all. Come dance with me," he says, more hypnotic, more demanding. I look into Wufei's eyes for reassurance, too afraid of Heero to deny him.

"It's alright, love," he whispers protectively, understanding the tearing feeling Heero produces inside me, "I'll be here. I won't let him hurt you again." He kisses my cheek, and something in my eyes must have agreed to go with Heero, because he uncurls his arms from around me and Heero takes my hand in his own. The grin that settles on his lips scares the shit out of me, I want to run away, I never want to see him again. I know what he wants from me and I refuse to give it to him, I refuse. Wufei will protect me from this motherfucker, right Wufei? Wufei? He's no where to be seen, because I've already been dragged onto the dance floor, allowing the beat of the music to consume me. Heero has taken me all the way to other side of the floor, far from the vision of any of the others, and I know that isn't' by accident.

He presses his body against me, thrusting his forceful hips into mine, pressing his erection into my groin through the black leather suffocating the lower half of his body. I don't want to feel that, he doesn't belong there, get him the hell off of me! I remember all the things he's done to me, all the times he's hurt me as he puts his hands on my ass and pulls me to him and holds me there, chest against chest, hips against hips, as tight as he can. I can't get away, let me go!

"Heero!" I growl, struggling to get away before he hurts me again. All he does is flash that evil smirk of his my way before crushing his lips into mine. One of his hands travels to the back of my neck, holding me helpless in his arms, every part of my body feeling violated. Maybe if I hurt him, I can get away. Maybe he'll let me go. I slide my fingers sensually up his back, beneath the fabric of his white t-shirt, tricking him into thinking I would accept this, that I would actually tolerate this, that I wanted him to do this. He relaxes, barely, but I can feel the escape of force right before I dig my fingernails into his back. I can feel his skin break beneath them. I rip my hands across his skin, cutting open as much as I can. How stupid can I be, to try to hurt Heero? I swear he's made out of fuckin' Gundanium or something; a scratch like this won't hurt him, it's just going to piss him off!

He tears his head from mine, now the only part of our bodies disconnected, and with a glare of rage, the pal of his hand meets my cheek with a loud crack.

"Don't," Heero grits out with another slap, "you," -slap- "dare," -two more slaps- "try to hurt me again."

I'm not sorry at all, and I prove that to him as I catch him off guard and swing my knee up to meet his groin. He doubles over and I take the opportunity to escape, dodging between the waves of the rhythmically moving mass on the dance floor to get back to Wufei. I can't find the booth for a few minutes, my frantic searching not being rewarded with any results. I can sense a presence moving toward me from behind, and maybe it's the paranoia but although the club is full of people, it might be Heero, so I dodge off again. A hand suddenly weighs down heavily on my shoulder, and I turn with a start, unexpectedly meeting the face of a curly haired boy no older than 20.

"Want to dance?"

My preoccupied gaze searched the crowd behind him rather than meeting his eyes as I slickly murmur,

"Sorry, I'm straight."

"Sure you are," he smirks and turns away from me, freeing me from the seductive spell the slaves of music cast over me. All I can see are bodies gliding, perfectly synchronized, and there isn't an escape from the shimmering skin hazing around me. I just want to find Wufei and get the hell out of here.

An all too familiar grip settles on my waist from behind, and through my struggle to get free, I know that it's already past too late as I'm dragged to the bathroom. I try crying out but the music is crashing around me in suffocating waves, preventing the flight of my cries through the thick and heavy air.

Heero's eyes show no sign of remorse, no guilt, no... anything, as he shoves me into a wall and veers my lips with his own, not even bothering to conceal his actions in a stall. I bite down hard on his tongue as he tried to enter my mouth, being rewarded with another slap, and through the slightly muffled beat of the music, I hear the sound of a toilet flushing, granting me one last hope. As Heero curves his callused hand around my neck, not squeezing, but threatening, his body is ripped away from me by a power that belong to neither he nor I.

"Don't you _ever_ touch him again, Yuy," I hear the voice before I see the enraged face of my lover leering over Heero who he had caught far enough off guard to throw to the floor.

~And now the real world,
has stripped you of your royalty,
And from your kingdom you're evicted...~

Heero scrambled off the floor, standing to meet Wufei's blazing eyes.

"How do you that your precious lover wasn't acting on his own?" he challenges with a smirk. I open my mouth to protest, but luckily Wufei finds the idea preposterous.

"Come off it, Yuy. I know that you've been using Duo for far too long. Come on Duo, let's go home."

Heero's eyes never leave me as Wufei escorts me from the bathroom, and consumed by my shame, I wish that I hadn't needed Wufei's help, that I could have resisted Heero on my own. I guess part of me is still afraid, but Wufei is helping me kill that part of me, day by day.
**********
Heero: ::glares:: Why am I always the bad guy?

Kentra: Umm... you're just freakishly convenient? ::shrugs::

Duo: C'mon Heero, you know you like the attention. You don't get enough of it since Kent always uses me and 'Fei. ::grins::

Heero: Whatever. ::Turns to Kentra:: I want a story, just me and Duo, no abuse, no cheating, no nothing.

Kentra: Sorry, 1x2 just ain't my style, Heero.

Heero:: ::initiates Yuy-Death-Glare (tm)::

Kentra: Err... I'll see what I can do...

Heero: ::crosses arms:: That's better.
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