Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Long Way Round ❯ Chapter 1
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
Title: The long way round
Author: Justkat2790
Pairing: 2x1
Rating: R
Warnings: yaoi, non-graphic lemon and lime, mild angst, sap
Archived: Dacia's Site http://raygunworks.net/singles3/long_way_round.html
Or at my LJ http://justkat2790/livejournal.com/
Written for Livejournal GW500 Challenge 118: wrinkle. Feature element: ribbon
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing is the property of Bandai, Sunrise and Sotsu Agency. No disrespect is intended to its characters or creators.
Aknowledgements: Thanks to Forevertwoxone, Katrina Jamieson, Muffie, and Wicked Game for information about Preventor names.
Feedback craved like chocolate, even if it’s just ^___^.
NOT precisely a blanket fic. Although I daresay it might have been one, if Heero had thought to pack a blanket…
The last place that Heero Yuy expected to see Duo Maxwell, was on his doorstep on a Saturday afternoon, during a power cut, in a thunderstorm.
Heero Yuy didn't expect to see Duo Maxwell at all, and hadn't expected him for at least twelve months, which was why he wasn't thinking about it.
He was thinking about dinner.
Thank heavens for gas, he thought, putting a saucepan of water on to boil, and settling against the bench to wait.
Absently, he gazed out of the window, fingers finding their way to the single black band that he wore as a bracelet. Thoughtlessly, he slid it around and around his wrist, watching the rain.
It was still pouring down.
The electricity had gone out around lunchtime and was still out, even though it was now late afternoon. Or dark, anyway, although that might just be the rain. The phones had gone as well, meaning that it was a really bad time for him to have forgotten to recharge his cell-phone. Luckily he had a gas stove, otherwise he would have been driving into town for dinner. Heero shivered. It was chilly without the central heating. He should probably start searching for candles, and then he could curl up in bed with a book for the evening.
Or maybe not.
Was that someone at the door?
Heero dithered, worrying a fingernail, trying to decide whether to dump the rice into the water now, or to leave it until he'd answered the door. Most likely, the caller wouldn’t want much. Probably, just someone needing directions to Carson's. Heero didn't get many visitors.
There was another knock, louder, and longer this time, and showing all the signs of continuing indefinitely, whether Heero put the rice in or not.
Sighing with irritation, he put down the rice, managing to upend the packet all over the bench in the process, and turned off the gas. Took a moment to scoop the spilt rice into a cereal bowl, then cat-footed his way down the edge of his dim hallway to the front door and lurked silently in the corner shadows, with two neat pairs of shoes, and a rolled umbrella. Old habits died hard. Out of direct line of fire, and safe from observation, Heero peered at his visitor through the tall, narrow window beside the door.
It was Duo.
Heero stiffened with shock.
Duo Maxwell, sopping wet, and hunched into the collar of his soaked leather jacket, waterlogged braid dripping onto Heero's doormat.
For a surreal moment, Heero though about pretending to be out. All the lights were off. Duo would never know. Although… Duo Maxwell would never be standing out there, dripping onto his doorstep unless it was important. Duo hadn't stood on his doorstep in two years. It must be some kind of emergency, and Heero had been out of contact because his phone was out.
Taking a deep breath, Heero opened the door.
"Hullo Heero," said Duo.
Heero stared at him, abruptly forgetting what it was that he’d been about to say.
Duo looked just the same as always. Violet eyes, buried somewhere beneath those messy bangs. Hair still caught up in its long braid, the usual, warm brown on top, darkening to sodden tea as it dripped its way down his back. Helmet, thought Heero. Duo’s head was still dry. And combat boots. Duo must be riding his motorbike.
"Une asked me to pick you up. And don't panic!!" Duo grinned at him, with all of the old Duo sparkle. "It's not Relena! I'll brief you in the car." He wrang out his braid onto the doormat. "Oh. Your phone's out," he added helpfully, shaking water indiscriminately all over the mat, the door and Heero. "And you're off-line."
"I know that," said Heero, gripping the door handle. It was his day off, the first in ten days, so he hadn't worried when the phone went off. He’d thought that maybe, just maybe, the world could survive without him, for one day. And if it wasn't Relena in trouble, then…
"It’s my day off." He gritted his teeth. Maybe Duo didn't know. "Where's Agent Leaf? Or Falcon? He's supposed to be in the office."
"Yeah. I know it's your day off. Sorry," said Duo uncomfortably, grin vanishing like sun behind clouds. Heero blinked, surprised that Duo even remembered where his house was, to pester him on his day off, let alone knew when his day off was, to pester him on it.
Duo hunched his shoulders awkwardly. ""I hate to drag you out like this Heero. It’s just that Steele's broken his leg. Motor bike accident. There was a pile-up on the bridge in all the rain. Completely annihilated his bike…" Duo grimaced in sympathy, whether for Steele, or for the bike, Heero wasn’t quite sure. "And O'Grady's got glandular fever. And seeing as Marko's wife's having a baby, I've got no partner either. So you're stuck with me okay? I'll try not to cramp your style." He sniffed, and rubbed his face vigorously. The tip of his nose glowed endearingly pink, which, Heero told himself, was not actually endearing at all. Just messy.
He looked away, fiddling with the band around his wrist. Abruptly realised what he was doing and shoved his hands into his pockets.
At least now he knew why he was being paired up with Duo. He was never paired up with Duo.
"Don't be stupid," he said. "Who's driving?" There was a handkerchief in his pocket. Unable to help himself, he pulled it out and thrust it at Duo.
"Umm. You are. Oh. Thanks." Duo blew his nose thoroughly. Rolled the handkerchief up into a squashy ball and made to hand it back to Heero, then noticed a smear of mud on his elbow and scrubbed at it with the handkerchief. A pink monogrammed R poked out from between his fingers, and Heero stared at it with vague horror. Hell. Relena must have lent him a handkerchief. Maybe he could tell her that he'd lost it.
Duo held out the handkerchief, then, when Heero just stared at it dumbly, shoved it into a pocket. Shuffled his feet in the pool of water from his braid, and shivered. "It's my day off too." He grimaced skyward. "Gaah! Some day off! You'll have to drive because I only have my bike."
Oh. That's right. So he did. Heero hadn’t realised that it was Duo’s day-off. Time was, when Heero had known Duo's roster just as well as his own, but not any more.
"I'll get my stuff." Firmly, Heero shut the door, and then hovered indecisively in the hallway, still holding the doorknob. Reluctantly opened the door again. "Did you bring a change of clothes?"
Duo stared at him, and bit his lip. "Umm… It wasn't raining at home." He waved at a bulging duffle bag, behind him on the doorstep. "I brought the suspect kit. And grenades."
Heero sighed, and held the door open wider.
"Thanks Heero." Duo smiled sunnily at him, dripping his way into the hallway, and Heero ignored him, closing the door smartly behind him.
Duo could catch pneumonia, for all he cared.
He just didn't want his new leather upholstery getting stained.
+++
Ten minutes later, Duo’s motorbike was hidden in the garage, and Heero was backing out of his driveway, wondering if he remembered how to get to St Claire. He sighed. He seemed to remember that it was a good two-hour trip. And that was on a good day. Probably longer in torrential rain, and, most likely, fog, going through the mountains. Damn. He checked the gas, relieved to see that it was more than half full. The last thing that he needed was to run out of petrol, and look like an idiot, with Duo in the car.
"Left," said Duo helpfully, twisting to dump his duffle and two plastic bags full of wet clothes behind the back seat.
"I know that!" Heero flattened the accelerator, making the speedo jump, and then forced himself to slow down. Struggled to relax his death-grip on the wheel. Damn. It was ridiculous to get uptight over Duo. In two hours they'd be in St Claire, they'd have Jex interrogated, and Duo would go back to the rest of his team, whoever they were, and Heero could go home, and stew over all the things that he would have liked to say to Duo, if only he'd thought of them in time.
"Lucky you live out in the sticks," said Duo. "At least we’re half way there."
Heero ignored him. It didn't matter to him, what Duo thought of where he lived. He lived out of town, because there was nothing to keep him any closer, and because he liked the solitude. Not that he was home much, but it was a nice change from the chaos of the Palace. Being around people all the time made him edgy and uncomfortable. It seemed crazy to him, to live on earth and be crammed up in the city. You might as well be back on the colonies. And it was comforting to know that no-one could get closer than a kilometre, without being seen across the fields. He always had a room with Relena, if he wanted to stay in town.
"It’s nice out here," said Duo, and Heero glanced at him in surprise. He’d thought that Duo would hate the quiet of the countryside.
"Pretty," continued Duo. "I like it. At least…" His voice was muffled beneath one of Heero's towels, as he towelled his braid vigorously. "…what I could see of it with all this rain. And fog. Did you know it was sleeting at Hawkhaven?" He threw the towel into the backseat, making Heero duck for cover, and dropped his braid into his lap, with a sigh. "Phew. That's better."
Humming softly, he gazed out of the window at the shadowy trees ghosting past, and beat time with his fingers on his knee. Beside him, Heero fiddled with the windscreen wipers, trying to decide which speed was best, and eyed Duo out of the corner of his eye.
Duo was not normally so quiet. Heero had never heard anybody talk the way that Duo talked before. There had been times, back in the war, in their shared dorm room, when he'd driven Heero to distraction, chattering about chocolate, or C4, or industrial metal versus gothic metal, or what-car-will-you-get-after-the-war, and Heero had had to yell at him to shut up. Or hit him with a pillow. Or shove a sock in his mouth, but that had only happened once, because Duo had simply held him down and returned the favour, and it had been a very dirty sock. Or sometimes Heero had ignored him, but that wasn't nearly as entertaining.
However, there had also been times when Heero had clung to the sound of Duo's voice. To his soothing chatter, and his quiet query in the middle of the night, that said that Duo was still there. That everything was okay. Or, at least, that it would be.
Duo was the first real friend that Heero had ever had. Duo, who had taught him everything he'd ever needed to know about comics and ice cream, cartoons and Internet porn. Or being a friend.
Heero had known about fighting, more then he ever wanted to know, but Duo had known about people. It was always Duo, who attracted the crowds. Heero had watched, as Duo had been whirled away, into this group, or that one. Although, always, back then, Duo had whirled Heero away with him. And Heero had been happy to go, basking in Duo's presence like the sun, drinking up all that warmth and humour. So different to anyone he'd known before.
No matter which school they hid out in, by the end of the first day, Duo’s desk was always surrounded by a crowd, between classes, both boys and girls. At first, Heero would grit his teeth and ignore them, and Duo. Ignore his classmates, because they weren't worth his time, and Duo, because he could hardly hit him, without blowing his cover. Heero would try to study, blocking the giggles and chatter with his fingers, but always gave up in the end, feeling Duo’s pencil poking him in the back. Or Duo’s finger, or, occasionally, Duo’s eraser bouncing off his head. Then Heero would sigh, and turn around, and Duo would chatter to him about random things, like the latest movie, or song, or what was for lunch. Somehow, Duo managed to keep track of that sort of stuff, even in the middle of a war, and lunch was always important to Duo.
And gradually, Duo’s crowd would send out a feeler to include Heero’s desk as well, absorbing him into it. And, reluctantly, he would let himself be absorbed. And later, there had been the other pilots. But no matter how many new people Heero met, Duo remained his best friend. He didn't need anyone else. He had Duo.
The rain was bucketing down now, even heavier, if that was possible, and reluctantly, Heero eased off on the accelerator, leaning forward to peer through the windscreen.
"Would you like me to drive for a bit?" Duo shifted beside him.
"No," said Heero baldly. He wanted to arrive in one piece, thanks very much. Duo subsided back into his seat with a sigh, drumming his fingers softly against his thigh.
"You could check the map." Heero relented. "Unless you know where we’re going?" He’d thought that there should be a turn-off, but the roads had all been heading in the wrong direction so far.
"Well I had a look before I left home but…yeah." Duo shrugged his shoulders. "Is it in here?" Without waiting for an answer, he opened the glove box, and fished out the map. "It’s a bit wrinkled." He eyed it critically. "You’ve folded it wrong."
"No I haven't." Heero was defensive. "It doesn’t fit any other way. And I don’t use it much. Normally, Satellite Navigation’s enough, but this blackout seems to be effecting everything."
Duo unfolded the map and peered at it, frowning. "Figures," he said. "The bit that we need is right in the crease, where it’s ripped. And all the writing’s rubbed off. I think…" He squinted. And frowned. "Heero that's coffee. Anyway…I think you have to take the next left. That should bring us up onto the highway."
Carefully, Heero downshifted and took the turn, flicking on the headlights, and trying not to think about how much this felt like being back in the war, back when they'd go on missions and do stuff together.
When they'd joined Preventors together, Heero had expected it to stay the same. Partners. Best friends. Silly really. But it hadn't taken long before Duo started to drift away. He supposed that it wasn't surprising really. After the war ended, they were free to make their own friends, and Heero had always known that he wasn't sociable enough for Duo.
Not exciting enough. Not entertaining enough.
It had taken some months to sort out the roster for Relena's security detail. By that time, it hadn't been a huge surprise to Heero when Duo wasn't partnered with him. When Duo wasn't even on the roster.
Except that Relena had taken him to task over it. Demanded to know what he'd done to upset Duo, in a tone of voice that made him glad that she believed in Total Pacifism.
He'd realised by the look on her face that she hadn't meant to tell him that Duo had asked for the transfer.
+++
"You need to hang a right at the next T-junction." Duo leaned forward and fiddled with the dash. "Do you mind if I put the heater on?"
Heero checked the gauge. The outside temperature was dropping, as they climbed into the hills, and he knew from bitter experience, mainly involving a borrowed pillow, that Duo's hair would stay wet, until he un-braided it. Duo must be cold.
He glanced at him. Worried a fingernail, and wondered if he should offer him his jacket.
Duo was dressed in Heero's black t-shirt and jeans. No Preventors jacket, because Heero hadn’t had a spare one. He didn’t need many, because he was mainly with Relena. Duo was still wearing his own sodden combat boots, his feet being quite a bit larger than Heero's. Once upon a time, Duo had teased him that big feet meant that Duo was going to be much taller than Heero, but that had not yet happened. There had also been some other stuff, about big hands and big noses, which Duo had thought was absolutely hilarious, but Heero couldn't comment whether that had happened, not having seen Duo naked since that one brief glimpse, in the shower on Peacemillion. Judging by the clothes, they were still pretty much the same size, now that they were eighteen. Just taller.
Although Duo had filled out, too. Still slender, but hard and tight with muscle, his biceps swelling with the curve of his arm. Broad shoulders that looked as if he was still growing into them. Heero wondered if his old, black t-shirt looked as good on him as it did on Duo. Probably not. On Duo, it looked edible. On Duo, it looked…
Looking at Duo, Heero's stomach seemed to flip over, in a way that it hadn't done for two years, and he had to look away, swallowing hard
Clenching the wheel, he tried to concentrate on the white lines unreeling in the headlights, and fought to control his sudden intake of breath, terrified that Duo would hear it.
It wasn't so much that he'd forgotten how good Duo looked. He'd just locked it away, in a corner of his mind labelled 'Duo', and refused to think about it.
Duo was still poring over the map, humming softly. His cross swang forward out of his shirt as he leaned, and he ran his fingers absently along the thick, black string that held it. String or… Curiously, Heero peered closer. Ribbon. It was a black, velvet ribbon.
"I thought you always had a chain for that thing," said Heero, desperately needing to fill the silence. Duo's cross was sacrosanct. He'd never taken it off, that Heero could remember, and it had always swung from an old-fashioned, silver chain.
He remembered it vividly, hanging against Duo's wiry chest as he undressed in their shared dorm room. Gleaming, pale as moonglow, when he'd looked across to Duo in the night. Crystal water droplets, beading on it after Duo's shower, slipping from the cross onto smooth, pale skin and down… Heero shivered, and forced his eyes back on the road. Wondered, desperately, how much further to St Claire.
"Yeah," said Duo thoughtfully, smoothing the velvet gently, between thumb and forefinger. "I used to have a chain. But it broke, and I wanted to use the ribbon. It was kinda precious…" Voice trailing off into silence, he looked away from Heero, staring out of the side window.
"Oh," said Heero, hating the sarcastic tone of his voice, but hating Duos wistfulness even more. Hating the thought of someone else giving Duo presents, of Duo thinking about them, missing them, whoever they were, even though Heero knew that he should be happy that Duo had friends. "From a friend I suppose?"
"Yeah." Duo turned to look at Heero oddly. "Someone who was important to me. I do have some friends you know Heero."
Oh. Heero tightened his grip on the wheel, glaring straight ahead through the rain-smeared windshield. A boyfriend probably. Heero's stomach twisted savagely. Duo had had lots of boyfriends. At least that was what he'd heard. Special agents gossiped as much as high-school girls. It was all that down-time between missions. And Duo was the kind of person that people gossiped about. Not that it was any of Heero’s business, how popular Duo Maxwell was, or whom he was popular with. Or where. Duo had always been popular.
Heero had ached with jealousy, thinking of Duo with Seth, or Jake, or whoever it was supposed to be now. Had avoided the toilet on the third floor at Preventors, which had several messages about Duo Maxwell and Seth, or Jake, or whoever. Heero supposed that he was jealous of Duo, who seemed to be able to blend into a normal life, where Heero hadn’t. That Duo had a boyfriend, had love, where Heero didn’t.
Jealous of Seth, or Jake, or whoever it was, that they had Duo, when Heero didn’t.
Jealous, because he wanted Duo.
Had always wanted Duo.
Would always want him, just a little, no matter what.
Heero had wanted Duo from the first moment he saw him, when Duo shot him. There was no one else like Duo. He'd been cute, back then, and cute had grown into irresistibly hot, as he got older. Duo made Heero's heart pound and his mouth go dry, just to look at him. To think of him and…
Sharing a dorm room with him had been torment. Duo was gorgeous, and sexy, and completely lacking in any sort of modesty, with the cutest butt that a wide-eyed Heero had ever seen.
And a beautiful smile. Not the wide grin that he normally hid behind, but gentler. Happy and trusting. A smile that was just for Heero.
But, in the war, it was never the right time to say anything, and it wasn't until after the war that he'd been sure that Duo was gay. But, by then, when Heero thought that maybe it was the right time, Duo was not there any more.
Was not his partner, was never in the office, didn’t ring, didn’t visit, didn’t…do anything.
Maybe Duo had known that Heero wanted him. Maybe that was why he’d started avoiding Heero, so that he wouldn't have to let him down. After all, he could have anyone. There was no reason why he would want Heero.
"Hey Heero… Heero! Oi!!"
Duo flapped the map at him with a crack of paper, and Heero jumped, and glared at him. It was getting hard to hear over the drumming rain on the roof. It was torrential, now. And was that thunder? Hell.
Duo had the map folded into a small rectangle, showing lots of squiggly dotted lines and densely packed contours, and Heero eyed it with foreboding, sidelong, his other eye on the road.
Duo was looking at him hopefully, eyebrows raised. "Do you mind a bit of dirt? It's quicker. Bit windy maybe…"
"How much dirt?" Asked Heero suspiciously. Duo could never resist a short cut, even if it was a narrow, winding goat track, on the side of a cliff, that took twice as long as the highway. Said that nice, straight roads sent him to sleep. Heero liked nice, straight roads, that took him directly to where he wanted to go, so that he could sleep when he got there.
"Umm…hmm…" Duo counted, sucking his forefinger thoughtfully, in a way that Heero thought was hot as hell. He looked away. "30 kilometres?"
"No," said Heero, shifting in his seat and watching the road.
"Oh okay. Fine then," said Duo. "Go the long way round. See if I care. Go right."
Heero went right.
Duo hummed, and rested his foot on his knee and tapped out a syncopated rhythm on his combat boot.
His knee brushed against the back of Heero's hand every time Heero changed gears, sending small electric jolts up Heero's arm, and Heero put both hands firmly on the wheel.
Maybe, Duo had had no idea that Heero wanted him so much, and there was some other reason why he kept away from Heero.
But that was almost worse.
Almost.
It made something twist inside him, to think that he might have upset Duo somehow, enough to make him avoid Heero. Heero didn't want anything to hurt Duo.
Had spent an entire war trying to protect him. Worrying about him. Breaking him out of jail and patching him up after missions. Had cannibalised his gundam, to keep him on the ground. Had even broken two of his ribs, to make sure that he wouldn't follow Heero into danger. Heero shuddered just to think about it, even now.
He couldn’t seem to stop caring for Duo. Worrying about Duo. Wanting Duo to be happy. It wasn’t just that Duo was loyal, and clever, and fun, and a great friend. Once. Duo was also stubborn, and wilful, and very annoying, all the time. But still, Heero had to look out for him. It was something in Heero that went far deeper than just wanting Duo. He supposed that meant that he loved Duo.
He really, really loved Duo.
Damn.
+++
The rain wasn't letting up, and, now, it was accompanied by drifts of fog, that whisped between the tall trees hemming the road. Rivulets of brown water cut tracks into the muddy shoulder of the road.
Heero slowed the car to below the speed limit, resigned to a slow trip. There was no way they were going to make it to St Claire in two hours. He slowed further, as the road rose and then dipped down steeply. Leaning forward, he peered into the darkness, his eyes widening at the unexpected warning sign.
"Damn," he muttered. "The river."
Duo was poring over the map, still humming under his breath. "Great. That means we're on the right track."
"Yeah but…" The car rolled to a stop.
"Hey!" Duo looked up and his eyes widened. "Where's the bridge?"
"There isn't one." Absently, Heero worried the band around his wrist, stretching it out and letting it snap back, as he stared at the racing stream, flattened and spreading beyond its low banks. He could just dimly make out the far bank, in the light of the headlights. Rain churned the surface of the water like machine gun fire."I can see that!!" Said Duo. "How the heck are we supposed to get across?! It's flooded! Look at it! The bridge must have washed out!"
Heero sighed. "Duo it’s a ford."
"A what?" Duo eyed him curiously
"A ford. A crossing without a bridge. And it's flooded."
"Yeah." Duo eyed the torrent with a jaundiced eye. "I can see that. Damn." He scrubbed his face with his hands. "That's what that word was in the wrinkly bit on the map. I thought that it said ferry."
"Well it's not. It's a ford. And we can't get across." Heero felt obliged to make sure that Duo knew that, emphasised with a healthy snap of elastic.
"Yeah. I know." said Duo, appearing from behinds his hands. He bit his lip. "You told me." Abruptly, he grinned. " Damn! Everything's so complicated on Earth! Sort of stuff that used to happen to us back in the war."
Silently, Heero agreed. This was just the sort of thing that used to happen to them back in the war. Just like the old days, when they were partners.
Irritation warred with a comfortable warmth, that he hadn't felt in far too long. Heero had never felt so conflicted in his life, torn between overwhelming desires, to either strangle Duo or kiss him senseless. Unfortunately, he could do neither.
All he could do was turn the car around.
They'd just have to find another road.
Carefully, he placed his hands on the steering wheel, without either banging his head against it, or punching it. Or Duo.
"Gee. It's really bucketing down. Hear that thunder!!" Duo leaned forward to peer up at the sky through the windscreen, side-lit by a brilliant flash of electricity. "Hey! That's lightning! Woah!!! That was close!! Check it out! Hey!!!" Lightning forked, and Duo twisted to peer behind them, clinging to the back of his seat. "That hit that tree!!! Holy…"
Ponderously, the tree toppled towards them, slowly at first, then picking up speed and groaning as it fell.
Duo shoved Heero towards the door and scrambled from the car.
…SHIT!!! Heero!!! Run!!!"
Arms pumping, they sprinted from the car, towards the river. Heero stumbled, and Duo dragged him to his feet, falling and tripping, heart racing madly. They ran on.
A thunderous crash shook the earth behind them, just as they reached the flat sheet of water, and Heero jerked as if he'd been hit. For a moment he thought his heart had stopped. In tandem, they slowed to a stop, spinning to look behind them. Heero panted and coughed, lungs on fire in the cold air. He squinted into the headlights, at the dark mountain of tree that loomed behind his car. Damn.. It looked as if it had only just missed the car. Probably by a few car lengths. He shuddered in reaction, heart racing, and turned to Duo.
"Holy shit!!!" Hands on his knees, shuddering and gasping for breath, Duo’s eyes were as wide as saucers, staring back at the enormous tree. It’s ghostly trunk was higher than the roof of the car. "That was a close one! Nearly got your car buddy! Geez! Earth!” He grinned and shook his head. "Kinda makes you glad that they don’t have things like that back on the colonies!"
Grimly, Heero shoved his sodden hair off his face, and walked back to the fallen tree, picking his way through a carpet of leaves and twigs and broken branches. The trunk had missed the road, but the crown of the tree had fallen right across it, and the road was completely blocked by the tangle of branches. Tentatively Heero cat-footed out onto the muddy shoulder of the road, and nearly sank to his ankle, red clay sucking to the sole of his shoe. He scraped his foot against the asphalt, frowning. There was no way he could drive around the tree. They'd get bogged.
And they couldn't go forward across the river.
Duo appeared at his shoulder and whistled softly, staring at the tree.
"Looks like we're stuck buddy."
+++
Duo sighed and shut his cell phone with a snap, putting it down on the dashboard.
"That was Une. She said they're sending someone out to clear the road, but it could take a while. There's trees down all over the place. And she said that she’ll send out another team for Jex. You can question him back at the office. Hell!" Duo scrubbed his hands over his face. "What a waste of time!! Oh well." He took his hands away, grinning at Heero. "Just another day in the office eh hero-boy?"
Heero nodded, gazing out of the window into the darkness. He'd turned the headlights off, but left the car running, so that they could have the heater and interior light. It was going to get pretty cold if the road crew didn't arrive soon. Shirtless and sopping, they were huddled into a towel each, their shirts spread behind them on the back seat to dry.
Towel dangling like a cape, Duo twisted around to lean over the back seat, and rummaged in his duffel bag, and Heero smiled faintly, watching his reflection. Duo always had a stash of food and drink somewhere. Almost had a phobia about being without, and when they'd been working together during the war, he'd started to pack snacks for Heero as well. Chocolate bars and soda for Duo, packets of chips and iced tea for Heero. Heero had always preferred iced tea to soda, to Duo's disgust, but, with Duo's help, he’d nurtured a guilty passion for other kinds of junk food.
Duo sat back and popped his soda, and Heero almost grinned. Some things never changed.
"Want one?" Duo held out an iced tea and Heero stared at it, and him, in surprise. Duo had remembered.
"Thanks," he said, taking the can, and they drank in warm, companionable silence.
As he drank, Duo played with the ribbon around his neck, clutching it in his fist and rubbing the dark velvet between his thumb and forefinger, staring absently through the windscreen.
Now that he had leisure to look closely, Heero saw that the velvet was flattened and shiny from constant rubbing, even a little bare in some spots. Duo obviously fiddled with the ribbon, the way that he had once fidgeted with his braid. Whoever had given it to him must have been very important. Definitely a boyfriend.
The warm glow, from the gift of iced tea, disappeared.
"Hadn't you better ring your boyfriend?" he asked, trying to sound nonchalant, but only sounding grumpy, even to himself. He gritted his teeth, as Duo turned to look at him, startled.
"What boyfriend?"
"Oh," said Heero. "I thought… Well…What about your flatmates?"
"Naah." Duo finished his soda and crushed the can, twisting to slip it into the plastic bag with his wet clothes. "I'm in Preventors barracks. I've never really found anyone that I wanted to share with. I'm kinda hard to get along with you know."
"Oh." Heero digested that. He didn't know. He'd never had any trouble getting along with Duo. But maybe it was different now. Quite likely, Duo wanted to be able to stay out late and have wild parties or something, which might not suit a roommate. Silently, Heero drank his tea, trying to adjust his mental image of Duo, to picture Duo all alone. This was not what he'd expected at all. He'd imagined Duo cosily settled with Seth, or Jake, or whoever it was.
"And at least in the barracks there's other people around. Even though they're not right there."
Heero nodded. Duo had always liked to surround himself with a gang of people, in a way that Heero had never been able to understand. Heero hated to be around other people. Except Duo.
"…and it's handy to Saint Pats."
"Oh?" said Heero curiously, wondering why Duo would want to be near a church. Duo had never been particularly religious, despite the priest's collar that he'd worn during the war. Heero had long ago come to the conclusion that that was probably some sort of disguise. Or, maybe, just the only clothes that Duo had been able to scrounge. Unlike him, Duo had not had a ready supply of funds from Dr J.
"Yeah." Duo sighed and stretched, before wrapping his arms around his knees and curling into his seat again. "The refuge. I help out there whenever I get time. Weekends and so on. Saturday's are usually the busiest. A lot of people have drunk their pension money by then."
Oh. Covertly, Heero eyed Duo, trying to reconcile Duo's life with what he remembered of Duo. Duo had loved people, and fun and lots of action. Parties, and mischief, and chaotic games of basketball, where Duo was usually the star of the show. This did not sound like the Duo that Heero remembered at all. Heero did not want this for Duo. This Duo sounded as lonely as Heero was.
"But what about…" Heero stopped. He wanted to ask what about having fun, and ‘hanging out’ and all the other things that Duo used to like to do, but instead he asked, "What about your partner?"
Heero knew Agent Amber by name, because he was Duo’s partner, and appeared on the roster sheets, although not by sight. Jealously, he thought that Agent Amber would probably love to spend a lazy Saturday afternoon with Duo, helping out a bit, and then going out, or whatever it was that they did afterwards. "Agent Amber. Does he help out too?"
"Marko?!?" Duo rocked back in his seat, laughing, and Heero basked in the familiar riot of sound, captivated and charmed, almost forgetting to listen.
"Naah." Duo sat back up, and grinned. "Tony Markowitz is a good catholic, with a wife and seven kids. Oops. Eight kids," he corrected himself, still grinning broadly. "Heck." He shook his head. "That means I owe him another present. Naaah. Marko’s a good bloke, but he’s got no time for that kind of stuff. Charity really begins at home for him! Guy’s always asking me to bring him some soup. Says Josie can’t cook for peanuts. Poor girl's probably got no time for cooking," he added, grinning. "Soup!" He shook his head again. "You know? Soup kitchen? Funny ha ha. Guy’s got a sense of humour, I’ll say that for him."
"Oh." Said Heero. It sounded like Duo was fond of his partner, but he didn’t hang out with him either. Heero ached for Duo. He wanted Duo to be having fun, with friends, even if they weren’t Heero. He wanted Duo to be happy. Duo didn’t sound very happy to him. He tried to think what to say next. He wasn’t very good at being tactful, it wasn’t a skill that either Dr J, or Odin, had thought that he needed, but he didn’t want Duo to think that he was being critical of his life either. Duo could be very proud sometimes. Carefully, he chose his words. "You sound very busy. Do you have time for anything else?"
"Naaaah. Not really." Duo didn’t look offended, and Heero let out his breath with relief. "When I’m not at the refuge I’ve got homework. Doesn’t leave much time for anything else."
"Homework!" Heero smiled. He couldn’t help it. "Duo you hated school. Why are you doing homework?"
"Mmm. Well…" Duo was looking down, and clutching his ribbon again, his cheeks dusted with pink. Heero thought that he looked adorable. "I want to make something of my life Heero. And to do that, I need an education. It’s taken a while to catch up though. I kinda missed a bit of school, what with the war and all."
"I could help," offered Heero eagerly, before he could stop himself, compelled by his age-old compulsion to help Duo. He blushed fiery red. Duo didn’t want his help. Didn’t want anything to do with him.
"Thanks Heero." Duo’s smile was soft, and he let go of the ribbon to pat Heero’s leg gently. "But you’re busy with your own stuff. You’re at Calvin U aren’t you? And looking after Relena. How is she?" he asked politely.
Heero blinked, wondering how Duo knew what University he was studying at. "Relena's fine," he said, smiling a little. "She works too hard and doesn't eat enough. She thinks that the peace will collapse without her."
"Hmm," Duo snickered. "Same as Quatre. Someone should get those two together."
"I don’t think that Wufei would like that," said Heero seriously, and Duo grinned.
"Naaah. Probably not. Or Trowa!"
"She asks about you sometimes," said Heero softly. "Where you are. What you're doing. " It was hard to admit that even Relena had noticed that he and Duo were not close any more.
"Well now you can tell her," said Duo. "You’ve asked lots about me. You haven’t told me anything about you yet." He was curled sideways into his seat, cheek pillowed on the back, face tilted to watch Heero. Curious and intent, his eyes roamed Heero's face in the darkness.
"No." Heero stared back solemnly. "I wanted to know what you were doing." He wanted to know everything about Duo, now that he had this chance, before Duo disappeared out of his life again.
"Oh." Again, that soft smile and pat. "That’s nice."
Duo had always touched Heero more than anyone else. Hung over his shoulder, or tickled him, or grabbed him by the hand, or arm, to drag him somewhere. Duo was always dragging Heero somewhere. Initially, Heero had hit him, or pushed him away, but Duo had kept doing it regardless, seemingly unable to stop. It was just something that Duo did, touching Heero, and Heero had come to accept it, with all the other things that went to make up his best friend. Had missed it, when he stopped seeing Duo. Absently, he wondered if anyone else had touched him recently. Apart from Relena. But that was different. Motherly, maybe, although he didn't really know what that was like.
“But it’s your turn now.” Duo was still watching Heero intently. “Is your course going well? Sounds like you’re having fun with Queenie…”
Heero didn’t think that he could tell Duo that he was miserable. He searched for something to say that might interest Duo. “I am working on the Mars data with a grad student. Zechs is my contact. It’s odd. I taught Relena Poker.” He corrected himself. “Texas Wildcard Poker. Like you showed me. We play on the shuttle.” Duo had his fist tucked under his chin with a handful of ribbon, and was nodding to himself. “And I got shot when we were on L3.”
“Damn! That sucks!” Duo grimaced in sympathy. “Me too. I’d forgotten how much it hurts.”
What?! Heero jerked upright.
"Where! Show me!"
The command was out before Heero could stop it. Mortified, he blushed furiously, looking away and reminding himself sternly that this wasn't the war, when he needed to bandage Duo; to tell him to hold still, to stop being such a baby, to take his antibiotics. To ride roughshod over him, when Duo tried to brush him aside, because, sometimes, Duo needed looking after. Duo had never taken care of himself properly. Had sometimes acted as if he thought he deserved to be hurt. To be punished for something.
But that was then, and now, Duo had other people to look after him.
"Sorry," said Heero miserably, cursing his ridiculous protectiveness, hands locked in his lap. Fingers feigning an interest in the snap and twirl of his wristband. "I didn’t mean…I just wanted to check that you…that it was…. I… Sorry."
Unhappily, he peered out the window.
Hell.
Duo blinked at him.
"No. No it’s okay Heero. No problem. I don’t mind."
Calmly he unbuttoned his jeans.
What??!
Open-mouthed, Heero stared, shocked and speechless, instantly hot with shame and desire, as Duo paused to push up his towel, baring the smooth ripples of a six pack. Wriggled and arched up off the seat, lithe as a cat.
"Damn," said Duo, writhing sinuously, and Heero’s face flamed. “Damn jeans’re impossible when they're wet." Thumbs in the waistband, Duo wrestled them over slim hips, and peeled down his black boxer briefs, just far enough to bare the smooth skin of his thigh.
Heero swallowed, hard.
Duo’s pubic hair was a soft chestnut, just a little darker than his thick braid. The skin of his hip, smooth and white against the light tan of his flat belly. Duo had a tan. Heero had never seen Duo with a tan before. But last time Heero had seen Duo’s body, it hadn’t looked anything like this. Back then, you could count every rib. Back then, Duo had been cute. Now he was gorgeous.
Wide-eyed and open-mouthed,. Heero stared.
A puckered red scar marred the pale skin of Duo’s thigh, round and shiny, and flanked by small, red dots. Desperately seeking distraction, Heero counted them. Six. Only six stitches. That was good. That was very good. That was…
Frantically, Heero struggled for something to say, unable to say any of the things that sprang to mind, like …can I… would you… what if I… Duo please… please Duo…
Instead… "Boxer briefs?" Duo had always worn boxers, back in the war.
"Yeah. Kinda reminded me of you. Spandex you know?" Duo’s voice sounded odd, but Heero couldn’t look away to check his expression, mesmerised by Duo’s torso so temptingly bared before him.
"Does it hurt?" Heero struggled to keep his voice even and matter of fact. To remember to breathe. Biting his lip, he clenched his fists so that he wouldn’t be tempted to touch that perfect body.
"Naah. Hurt like heck at the time but not any more. You can touch if you want."
Shocked, Heero’s gaze jerked up to Duo’s eyes. Did Duo know…?
"You can. I don’t mind." Solemnly, Duo gazed back. Inched his briefs down further to reveal more pale skin. More muscled thigh.
Heero stared back, his heart pounding frantically, suddenly unable to breathe, his fingers uncurling and stretching towards Duo, almost without his volition.
Oh God. Would Duo let him… Was Duo going to…
If he touched Duo now, he wouldn’t be able to stop. He couldn’t. He just couldn’t. Would have to have more and more, until he had all of Duo. Would take more, want more…
And did Duo really want him to? Did he know that Heero wanted more? Surely he would say something if he did.
Duo had never been shy, back when they shared a room. What if he was just offering because he thought that Heero was worried about his leg? Which he was, but…
What if Duo wasn't really gay? What if Heero had based his entire adult life on some horrible misunderstanding, based on five minutes in the Preventor toilets on the third floor?
Or…what if it was a game? Heero’s stomach churned sickly. One of Duo’s jokes. Heero had never understood jokes, the way that Duo had.
What if he was just playing with Heero, wanting to see how far he could make him go before he pushed him away? Heero didn’t think that he could bear to be pushed away.
"It’s okay Heero," Duo said softly, easing the taut fabric down a little further. "I don’t mind. Status check. Yeah?"
Status? Always, they would ask each other that, after each shared mission. As they collapsed into their room, beaten, and bruised, and dirty and afraid.
Trembling, Heero’s fingers hovered over Duo’s thigh.
Status check Duo.
Ever so gently, he stroked one finger over the mark.
"Does that hurt?" Heero whispered, eyes on his gently moving finger. “Don’t let me hurt you…”
"No…" Duo’s answering whisper was caught somewhere in his throat. "You can press harder if you like …"
Reverently, Heero placed his palm over the mark, cupping Duo’s thigh. Duo’s skin felt so much silkier and smoother than Heero’s skin. Or maybe that was just because it was Duo. Gently, hardly daring to move, he stroked his thumb across Duo’s hip, and Duo’s belly vibrated like a harp string.
With dawning wonder, Heero watched the undulations of Duo’s belly. Duo liked it. He liked Heero touching him.
Experimentally, he explored the exposed skin of Duo’s thigh; slowly down, and then back up over the crest of Duo’s hip, to rest on the heat of Duo’s quivering belly, and Duo gasped. Heero flushed hotly and shifted in his seat. Burned with the need to hear more and better sounds from Duo. Eagerly, he leant across the gear stick and it was as if he was falling through water, sinking down to press his lips to the scar. Duo trembled beneath him and that was good, but he wanted more, so he opened his mouth, sucking and licking the smooth skin, then pressed hot sucking kisses up onto his stomach. Duo gasped and undulated beneath him, with little breathy moans, and fascinated, heady with power, Heero stroked his tongue over Duo’s hip, then bit down gently. Duo jerked and whimpered.
“Heero…”
Vaguely, Heero was aware that Duo was trying to touch him back, petting him, stroking his shoulder and hair, but mainly Heero was hard and aching with the knowledge that he was the one doing this to Duo. That it was him making Duo make those maddening, intoxicating noises. That he was pleasing Duo. All he’d ever wanted was to please Duo. He wanted to do more. Wanted Duo helpless and desperate for him.
There had to be more…
Carefully, blood roaring in his ears like the drumming rain, he peeled down Duo’s briefs, and Duo gasped and shivered, fingers finding their way into his hair…
“Oh…oh God…Heero… Heero Heero please…”
+++
Uncomfortably twisted, gear stick digging into his hip, Heero Yuy had never imagined that anything could be so euphoric.
Overwhelmed and astounded, aching with love and desire, he pressed fervent kisses into Duo’s stomach, not sure what to do next. Duo’s fingers were still loosely twined into his hair, but…was that it? Should he kiss Duo? Could they do more? Would Duo even want to do more?
Would he ever want to do this again, or was Duo going to disappear from Heero’s life after tonight, just like before?
Panic-stricken, Heero clung tighter and press his face into the sweat-sheened skin, clinging to Duo’s scent and feel and salty taste. Warm and soft and hard all at once. Sticky, damp curls glued to Heero’s cheek. Duo's stomach still rippled with his shuddering breaths and Heero burrowed into it, unwilling to lift his head and see the end in Duo’s eyes.
"Shit!" Duo laughed breathlessly above him. " Heero! The road gang. They're here!" He tugged at Heero's hair, dragging Heero up to blink stupidly at the lights blazing through the back window.
"Holy shit! Hell! Shit!!!" Duo was giggling and squirming underneath him, trying to drag his pants back on. Duo bucked beneath him, and Heero dazedly realised that he still had his hand planted in the middle of Duo' stomach. He jerked upright, and wriggled stiffly back into his seat.
Hell..
He snatched his shirt from the back seat.
“If I help it will be quicker…”
Still completely unable to face Duo, Heero grabbed the opportunity to escape, and flung the door open, scrambling out into the rain.
The road gang were already hard at work in the light of the headlights, chain-sawing limbs, and setting out witch's hats and warning signs.
Heero trudged across and offered to help, but they waved him away, citing insurance, and liability, so he stepped out of the way, and stood watching, hands thrust deep into the pockets of his jeans, until he was distracted by a Preventors jacket being thrust under his nose.
Duo stood beside him, shoulders hunched against the rain.
Heero glanced at him sidelong. Duo's hair looked as if it was melting into his eyes, the t-shirt as if it was painted on. "You have it," said Heero gruffly.
"Naah. I'm okay," said Duo, and waited until Heero put it on.
The rain lanced down in the headlights, a wall of silver spears. The buzz of the chainsaw drowned out everything except Duo's low voice.
"I've missed you Heero," said Duo softly.
What?? Heero turned to stare at Duo, suddenly overwhelmed with old hurt and confusion. And anger. Duo had left him, not the other way around. He would never have left Duo.
"But I was there! You could have found me! You could have…" Words clamoured and tumbled from his mouth, and Heero took a deep breath and swiped rain from his face. That was not what he needed to say.
"Why did we stop being friends Duo?"
"We were too different Heero." Duo fiddled with his necklace. "It could never work out."
"But it wasn't a problem during the war!" Heero struggled to understand. "We were a team!"
A great team. Not very often, but when they'd worked together it had been like the purr of a well-tuned engine. Unstoppable.
"Yeah…" Duo clutched his ribbon tightly. "…but that was all gonna change in peacetime."
"Why?" Heero glared at him. "Why did it have to change?"
"Well…you were gonna be doing different things. Seeing different people."
"What? Who?" Heero stared at him in bewilderment. Duo was the one who had done those things.
"Well…Relena for one. You were hanging out with the princess and stuff, going to balls and all, and there was no way that she was gonna want me hanging around. I just don't fit in with that kind of crowd. You do Heero." Duo smiled at him warmly. "You're amazing. You can do anything."
"So can you!" Said Heero hotly. Nobody was more amazing, or better at blending in than Duo. Duo could do anything that he put his mind to.
"Relena was always asking for you." Duo stared into space. "To escort her to some ball. Eating with all those posh people. Dancing. You were a great dancer Heero. Still are," he added softly.
"But I could have taught you to do that!" Heero protested furiously, brushing Duo's compliment aside. Dr J had made sure that Heero could do all that stuff, in case he needed it for infiltration, and, earlier, Odin had demanded it as well, because it was always very important to blend in. And he certainly wouldn't have let a younger Heero eat with sloppy table manners, no matter how tired that little boy had been. "And anyway Relena likes you! You know that. She wouldn't care. She's not like that. She doesn't mind about...about…table manners and so on. You know she doesn't!"
"Yeah," said Duo softly, back to playing with the ribbon. "But I would. I know she's not like that Heero. And it's not just how to use a fork, or stuff like that. I mean…it'd be a synch to learn that stuff really. But… I used to watch you dancing with her. Back in the early days. When we were all guarding her before she got her own security detail. You looked so perfect together. Waltzing and stuff. You were the handsome prince and I was just some scruffy kid who needed you to do his tie." He grimaced, looking away. "You were both sitting there, trying to decide which University courses you were going to do, and I'd hardly even been in school. Maths was okay. I'm good at that. But I could hardly read until I met Professor G Heero!"
Heero blinked at him, wondering why he'd never realised that before. Dr J had made him stick with his schoolwork, but Duo had led a nomadic existence for most of his life. Duo was smart, and clever, clever enough to hide his lack of schooling, but that wouldn't be enough to get him into higher education.
The road patrol had finished clearing branches, and were packing up, throwing equipment into the truck with a metallic clang, obviously in a hurry to move on.
Heero ached for the pain that he could hear in Duo's voice. He remembered that time.
Heero had been excited, to finally be making his own choices. Had spent hours with Relena, checking course outcomes, and pre-requisites, and alternative pathways. Duo had been there, hovering somewhere in the background. It was just before he'd gone back to Preventors Ops. He'd made some crack about Safe-cracking 101 and then disappeared somewhere…
Heero clenched his fists. "So what? You're one of the cleverest people I know Duo."
"We were just too different Heero. You were making something of your life and I couldn't follow you. We were just going to drift further and further apart." Duo looked away, and Heero strained to hear him. "I figured that it'd be better if I just got it over with. Do it on my own terms. Save breaking my heart further down the track."
What?!! Heero stared, appalled that Duo had done something so terrible to him. To both of them. Duo wasn't happy either.
In the rain, Duo's profile was pale, and beautiful, and solemn as a statue, dark tendrils of hair painting sinuous patterns.
"And I was glad that you had such a good friend Heero. Somewhere to fit in. You were going to be someone important. I didn't want to spoil that for you. The rest of us all had other stuff, but you didn't. You'd always seemed so alone."
Heero thought about that, listening to the slam of doors and the roar of an engine as the road gang drove away. He supposed it was true. Duo had gone to the Sweepers, and Hilde, between wars. Quatre had his family and the Maganacs. The entire Winner empire. And Trowa had the circus and Wufei had a clan to rebuild, but…
"I had you!" Said Heero hotly, wishing that Duo would look at him. "You were my best friend. I didn't need anyone else." And he hadn't. "Just you! How could you think you would spoil anything?!"
"You were my best friend too Heero." At last, Duo turned to face him, solemn and serious. "And you wouldn't have wanted me hanging around. I'd just have dragged you down."
Heero stared at him, feeling a horrified twisting in his gut, to think that Duo had done this to him deliberately.
"Duo I could never not want you. I loved you! I'll always love you and you left me!!!"
Rain poured between them.
Sluiced down Duo's face, and into his open mouth, and his wide, shocked eyes.
Numb and cold, Heero stepped towards the car, fumbling for his keys with frozen fingers.
He'd shocked Duo. Upset him. He'd never wanted to upset Duo.
His car was covered with a blanket of torn leaves. He hadn't noticed before.
The tree was cleared, they could back out now, they should go, if only he could just find the right damned key…
He had his hand on the door handle, about to pull open the door, when he felt a touch on his arm.
"Heero…"
Cold fingers locked around his arm and spun him around, Duo's mouth finding his, ice cold momentarily, and then hot and hard and demanding, licking and sucking, Duo’s tongue setting fire to Heero's chilled skin. Duo pressed up against him and Heero stumbled backwards willingly, and slammed against the car door, locking his arms around Duo and opening his mouth eagerly for Duo's seeking tongue, shaking with love and desire.
Duo was touching him everywhere, kissing him frantic and fast, holding Heero in place with his body and his hard thigh, and it was so good, Heero couldn't focus, couldn't think, desperate to touch Duo back, but unable to stop holding him and rocking helplessly against him. He wanted Duo so much. Needed Duo to touch him more than he’d ever needed anything else in his entire life.
“Oh god Heero…I…”And then Duo was sliding away from him, slithering downwards, and Heero moaned helplessly and his knees buckled and he tried to follow, lips clinging to his kiss with helpless adoration, eagerly seeking, trying to catch Duo's mouth with his, but Duo was holding him in place, Duo's hands pushing roughly against his clothes, Duo's voice, a desperate litany against his skin, soothing him with lips and hands and warm, stroking tongue...
"Shhhh… it's okay… it's okay Baby… I'll look after you… I'll take care of you… just let me… let me… it's okay… Heero…"
Duo's eyes seeking his, through his sodden fringe, the only spot of colour in the drowned world, laden with some unnamed emotion.
"Oh…oh God…I…I… Duo!!!" said Heero, arms wrapped around Duo's head, trying to pet and stroke as much of him as he could reach.
"Mmmmm…" said Duo lovingly, somewhere deep in his throat, and Heero shuddered uncontrollably and curled over him, clawed fingers scrabbling for purchase against Duo's slick back.
+++
Heero fell to his knees in the mud in front of Duo, blindly searching for his mouth and letting Duo support him with his strong hands and broad shoulders. The air was still cold, but Duo was surprisingly warm, and Duo's mouth was soft; so soft and warm and gentle as it explored his tenderly, all previous desperation washed away.
After a long time, Heero realised that mud was soaking into his knees, and Duo's hair smelled like wet dog. It had stopped raining. He supposed that his hair smelled like wet dog too, but he couldn't seem to care when Duo's tongue was tracing lazy patterns against his neck, leaving an alternating trail of hot and cold that made Heero shiver and shake. Duo's tongue found his ear and he shuddered uncontrollably. Duo released his ear with a sucking smack and pulled back just a little, to give him that gentle smile that Heero loved.
"Damn Heero. Take me home. I'm frozen."
+++
There was a sopping Preventors jacket on Heero Yuy's doorstep. Dirty shoes lay every which way in the hall, and a trail of clothes and muddy footprints led from the door, detoured past the refrigerator, via a pool of rice, and tracked up the stairs, stalling at Heero’s bathroom door.
With his responsibilities as host, Heero thought that Duo might like a shower, because Duo was shaking against him. And muddy, but mainly because he was worried that Duo must be frozen. But Duo had other ideas.
“No way,” said Duo, with a warm swipe of lips and tongue, trembling beneath Heero’s hands, as if he was hypothermic. “Bed first, then shower. Maybe. If we don’t do this soon I’m going to explode Heero Yuy. I’ve waited four years and I’m not waiting a second longer.”
Lips glued to Heero’s, fingers busy with his jeans, he shuffled him backwards towards the bed. Heero was perfectly willing to be manhandled, and allowed himself to be manoeuvred, but balked again as the back of his knees hit the mattress. He sat down with a thump.
"What's wrong?" asked Duo softly, reading Heero like a book. Kneeling in front of him, so that he could see up beneath Heero’s bangs, and kneading his thighs gently.
Heero stared at the floor unhappily.
"Lube," he said. Not that he minded so much for himself, he supposed; he had been shot, and tortured, and blown up out of his gundam, after all, but he wanted this to be perfect for Duo. "I don't have any lube or…"
"Oh. That's okay. I do," said Duo, turning back to fish in his jeans, "Comes in handy," and Heero chewed his lip and tried not to think about why Duo might find lube handy.
But then Duo was climbing onto him, and pushing him down onto the bed, spreading his legs apart and crawling between them with practised ease, and that was just the way it should be, because Heero had always learned new things with Duo, and it was everything that Heero had ever wanted, right there in his arms, and Heero held him, and clung to him, and thought that if he got any happier he just might die.
+++
Afterwards, Heero pulled Duo down until Duo rested against his chest, stroking his back, his hair, as much as he could reach, without relaxing the death-grip that he had on Duo, and Duo relaxed against him with a sigh of contentment, flushed and sweaty.
"Mmm…Heero…" Duo sighed happily, shifting around until he had his head nuzzled under Heero's chin, and his leg between Heero’s, his fingers contentedly wound in his necklace.
Heero gritted his teeth. That damned ribbon again.
Heero wanted to rip it off. Wanted to cut it into tiny pieces, and burn it up, and send the ashes into the sun with the gundams. He didn't want Duo to play with it now, when he was with Heero.
"Who gave it to you?" asked Heero, and Duo lifted his head in surprise. Heero winced at the bitterness in his voice, but was completely unable to help himself. He pressed on. "The ribbon," he said. Jealousy burned like fire in his gut. The ribbon, the lube… He couldn't share Duo with anyone. Not now. "You must have liked them a lot."
Duo stared at him solemnly, and Heero stared back. He had to know. The cross, he knew about. It was something important from Duo's childhood, and that was fine. But the ribbon was new. Who had been important enough that Duo treasured their gift? And, most importantly, where were they now? Were they…oh God…waiting at home for Duo? Surely not. But then, there was that handy tube of lube…
"Heero…" Duo's cheeks were faintly flushed. "You gave me the ribbon. It was a long time ago." He buried his face in Heero's chest, clutching the ribbon protectively. "I'm not surprised you don't remember."
What?
And, just like that, Heero remembered.
He and Duo, stuck on Peacemillion, just before the last battle, and Duo had run out of hair ties.
The last one had broken at breakfast, when Duo had accidentally sat on his braid, long silky strands wafting over his shoulder to get in his cereal and Heero's breakfast, eyes and mouth. And Duo had cursed, mopping cereal out of his hair with his shirt, and demanding of the world at large, how in the heck he was ever supposed to pilot a gundam when he was being strangled by his own damned hair. And Heero had pushed his breakfast safely away from Duo's hair, on his self-appointed mission to take care of Duo, and marched across to Sally Po, who happened to be the only girl in the canteen at the time, and demanded that she give him something to fix Duo's hair. Or at least a spare bandage, if nothing else.
Heero's face burned in recollection. Sally had laughed. And laughed even louder, when he'd told her defensively that it was preventative medicine. It had been completely mortifying. Worse than when she'd fished shrapnel out of his upper thigh. He wondered how he could possibly have forgotten.
But after she'd stopped laughing at him, she'd unhooked her glasses from around her neck. Heero hadn't even realised that Sally wore glasses, but she'd had a tiny pair of reading glasses fastened around her neck with a long ribbon, and she'd untied it, and handed it to him, telling him that if it didn't work he could always just tie Duo up with it.
And then… as if that wasn't embarrassing enough…when he took the ribbon back to Duo, trying to shove it discreetly into his hand, Duo had complained loudly that he wasn't some damn girl, and that Heero could find somebody else if he wanted to play dollies, thanks very much. But Heero knew that he'd appreciated it anyway, mainly by the fact that Duo hadn't punched him, when Heero had lost his temper and held him down and tied up his annoying hair. Loose hair was a nightmare in low gravity. Kneeling on Duo's chest, Heero had wrapped the black velvet ribbon around Duo's plait half a dozen times, and tied it in half hitches and several, very un-girly reef knots, that had taken Duo half an hour to undo that night.
And after that, Heero had kept an emergency hair band around his wrist, and forgotten all about the ribbon.
Until now.
“You kept it,” said Heero, recognising the truth with a joyful leap of his heart, but wanting Duo to say it out loud anyway. “Because I gave it to you…”
“Yeah.” Duo was still buried in Heero’s chest so that Heero had to strain to hear him. “Pretty dumb huh.”
Duo had kept it all this time. Had used it for his cross. Had worn it close to his heart…
"You love me," said Heero softly, awestruck and hardly able to speak. Hardly able to breathe, or think, except for... "You really do love me."
"Yes!!! Idiot! What did you think?!!!! Geez!!!" Grinning, Duo butted Heero's sturdy chest with his forehead in time with his words. "Heero…idiot…I really…" thump "…really…" thump "…really love you. So what are you going to do…umph!!"
"This," murmured Heero Yuy against his lips, as he rolled him over and stretched out on top of him. Warm, and content, and suddenly blissfully, gloriously happy. "And this…and this…and probably this…"
"Oh." Said Duo Maxwell. "Mmmm. Oooh. Good."
And it was.
Very, very good.
+++
Authors note.
Inspired by an original story, Dare You by Matthew Haldeman-Time
http://www.matthewhaldemantime.com/1/idareyou.html< br>
Author: Justkat2790
Pairing: 2x1
Rating: R
Warnings: yaoi, non-graphic lemon and lime, mild angst, sap
Archived: Dacia's Site http://raygunworks.net/singles3/long_way_round.html
Or at my LJ http://justkat2790/livejournal.com/
Written for Livejournal GW500 Challenge 118: wrinkle. Feature element: ribbon
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing is the property of Bandai, Sunrise and Sotsu Agency. No disrespect is intended to its characters or creators.
Aknowledgements: Thanks to Forevertwoxone, Katrina Jamieson, Muffie, and Wicked Game for information about Preventor names.
Feedback craved like chocolate, even if it’s just ^___^.
NOT precisely a blanket fic. Although I daresay it might have been one, if Heero had thought to pack a blanket…
The last place that Heero Yuy expected to see Duo Maxwell, was on his doorstep on a Saturday afternoon, during a power cut, in a thunderstorm.
Heero Yuy didn't expect to see Duo Maxwell at all, and hadn't expected him for at least twelve months, which was why he wasn't thinking about it.
He was thinking about dinner.
Thank heavens for gas, he thought, putting a saucepan of water on to boil, and settling against the bench to wait.
Absently, he gazed out of the window, fingers finding their way to the single black band that he wore as a bracelet. Thoughtlessly, he slid it around and around his wrist, watching the rain.
It was still pouring down.
The electricity had gone out around lunchtime and was still out, even though it was now late afternoon. Or dark, anyway, although that might just be the rain. The phones had gone as well, meaning that it was a really bad time for him to have forgotten to recharge his cell-phone. Luckily he had a gas stove, otherwise he would have been driving into town for dinner. Heero shivered. It was chilly without the central heating. He should probably start searching for candles, and then he could curl up in bed with a book for the evening.
Or maybe not.
Was that someone at the door?
Heero dithered, worrying a fingernail, trying to decide whether to dump the rice into the water now, or to leave it until he'd answered the door. Most likely, the caller wouldn’t want much. Probably, just someone needing directions to Carson's. Heero didn't get many visitors.
There was another knock, louder, and longer this time, and showing all the signs of continuing indefinitely, whether Heero put the rice in or not.
Sighing with irritation, he put down the rice, managing to upend the packet all over the bench in the process, and turned off the gas. Took a moment to scoop the spilt rice into a cereal bowl, then cat-footed his way down the edge of his dim hallway to the front door and lurked silently in the corner shadows, with two neat pairs of shoes, and a rolled umbrella. Old habits died hard. Out of direct line of fire, and safe from observation, Heero peered at his visitor through the tall, narrow window beside the door.
It was Duo.
Heero stiffened with shock.
Duo Maxwell, sopping wet, and hunched into the collar of his soaked leather jacket, waterlogged braid dripping onto Heero's doormat.
For a surreal moment, Heero though about pretending to be out. All the lights were off. Duo would never know. Although… Duo Maxwell would never be standing out there, dripping onto his doorstep unless it was important. Duo hadn't stood on his doorstep in two years. It must be some kind of emergency, and Heero had been out of contact because his phone was out.
Taking a deep breath, Heero opened the door.
"Hullo Heero," said Duo.
Heero stared at him, abruptly forgetting what it was that he’d been about to say.
Duo looked just the same as always. Violet eyes, buried somewhere beneath those messy bangs. Hair still caught up in its long braid, the usual, warm brown on top, darkening to sodden tea as it dripped its way down his back. Helmet, thought Heero. Duo’s head was still dry. And combat boots. Duo must be riding his motorbike.
"Une asked me to pick you up. And don't panic!!" Duo grinned at him, with all of the old Duo sparkle. "It's not Relena! I'll brief you in the car." He wrang out his braid onto the doormat. "Oh. Your phone's out," he added helpfully, shaking water indiscriminately all over the mat, the door and Heero. "And you're off-line."
"I know that," said Heero, gripping the door handle. It was his day off, the first in ten days, so he hadn't worried when the phone went off. He’d thought that maybe, just maybe, the world could survive without him, for one day. And if it wasn't Relena in trouble, then…
"It’s my day off." He gritted his teeth. Maybe Duo didn't know. "Where's Agent Leaf? Or Falcon? He's supposed to be in the office."
"Yeah. I know it's your day off. Sorry," said Duo uncomfortably, grin vanishing like sun behind clouds. Heero blinked, surprised that Duo even remembered where his house was, to pester him on his day off, let alone knew when his day off was, to pester him on it.
Duo hunched his shoulders awkwardly. ""I hate to drag you out like this Heero. It’s just that Steele's broken his leg. Motor bike accident. There was a pile-up on the bridge in all the rain. Completely annihilated his bike…" Duo grimaced in sympathy, whether for Steele, or for the bike, Heero wasn’t quite sure. "And O'Grady's got glandular fever. And seeing as Marko's wife's having a baby, I've got no partner either. So you're stuck with me okay? I'll try not to cramp your style." He sniffed, and rubbed his face vigorously. The tip of his nose glowed endearingly pink, which, Heero told himself, was not actually endearing at all. Just messy.
He looked away, fiddling with the band around his wrist. Abruptly realised what he was doing and shoved his hands into his pockets.
At least now he knew why he was being paired up with Duo. He was never paired up with Duo.
"Don't be stupid," he said. "Who's driving?" There was a handkerchief in his pocket. Unable to help himself, he pulled it out and thrust it at Duo.
"Umm. You are. Oh. Thanks." Duo blew his nose thoroughly. Rolled the handkerchief up into a squashy ball and made to hand it back to Heero, then noticed a smear of mud on his elbow and scrubbed at it with the handkerchief. A pink monogrammed R poked out from between his fingers, and Heero stared at it with vague horror. Hell. Relena must have lent him a handkerchief. Maybe he could tell her that he'd lost it.
Duo held out the handkerchief, then, when Heero just stared at it dumbly, shoved it into a pocket. Shuffled his feet in the pool of water from his braid, and shivered. "It's my day off too." He grimaced skyward. "Gaah! Some day off! You'll have to drive because I only have my bike."
Oh. That's right. So he did. Heero hadn’t realised that it was Duo’s day-off. Time was, when Heero had known Duo's roster just as well as his own, but not any more.
"I'll get my stuff." Firmly, Heero shut the door, and then hovered indecisively in the hallway, still holding the doorknob. Reluctantly opened the door again. "Did you bring a change of clothes?"
Duo stared at him, and bit his lip. "Umm… It wasn't raining at home." He waved at a bulging duffle bag, behind him on the doorstep. "I brought the suspect kit. And grenades."
Heero sighed, and held the door open wider.
"Thanks Heero." Duo smiled sunnily at him, dripping his way into the hallway, and Heero ignored him, closing the door smartly behind him.
Duo could catch pneumonia, for all he cared.
He just didn't want his new leather upholstery getting stained.
+++
Ten minutes later, Duo’s motorbike was hidden in the garage, and Heero was backing out of his driveway, wondering if he remembered how to get to St Claire. He sighed. He seemed to remember that it was a good two-hour trip. And that was on a good day. Probably longer in torrential rain, and, most likely, fog, going through the mountains. Damn. He checked the gas, relieved to see that it was more than half full. The last thing that he needed was to run out of petrol, and look like an idiot, with Duo in the car.
"Left," said Duo helpfully, twisting to dump his duffle and two plastic bags full of wet clothes behind the back seat.
"I know that!" Heero flattened the accelerator, making the speedo jump, and then forced himself to slow down. Struggled to relax his death-grip on the wheel. Damn. It was ridiculous to get uptight over Duo. In two hours they'd be in St Claire, they'd have Jex interrogated, and Duo would go back to the rest of his team, whoever they were, and Heero could go home, and stew over all the things that he would have liked to say to Duo, if only he'd thought of them in time.
"Lucky you live out in the sticks," said Duo. "At least we’re half way there."
Heero ignored him. It didn't matter to him, what Duo thought of where he lived. He lived out of town, because there was nothing to keep him any closer, and because he liked the solitude. Not that he was home much, but it was a nice change from the chaos of the Palace. Being around people all the time made him edgy and uncomfortable. It seemed crazy to him, to live on earth and be crammed up in the city. You might as well be back on the colonies. And it was comforting to know that no-one could get closer than a kilometre, without being seen across the fields. He always had a room with Relena, if he wanted to stay in town.
"It’s nice out here," said Duo, and Heero glanced at him in surprise. He’d thought that Duo would hate the quiet of the countryside.
"Pretty," continued Duo. "I like it. At least…" His voice was muffled beneath one of Heero's towels, as he towelled his braid vigorously. "…what I could see of it with all this rain. And fog. Did you know it was sleeting at Hawkhaven?" He threw the towel into the backseat, making Heero duck for cover, and dropped his braid into his lap, with a sigh. "Phew. That's better."
Humming softly, he gazed out of the window at the shadowy trees ghosting past, and beat time with his fingers on his knee. Beside him, Heero fiddled with the windscreen wipers, trying to decide which speed was best, and eyed Duo out of the corner of his eye.
Duo was not normally so quiet. Heero had never heard anybody talk the way that Duo talked before. There had been times, back in the war, in their shared dorm room, when he'd driven Heero to distraction, chattering about chocolate, or C4, or industrial metal versus gothic metal, or what-car-will-you-get-after-the-war, and Heero had had to yell at him to shut up. Or hit him with a pillow. Or shove a sock in his mouth, but that had only happened once, because Duo had simply held him down and returned the favour, and it had been a very dirty sock. Or sometimes Heero had ignored him, but that wasn't nearly as entertaining.
However, there had also been times when Heero had clung to the sound of Duo's voice. To his soothing chatter, and his quiet query in the middle of the night, that said that Duo was still there. That everything was okay. Or, at least, that it would be.
Duo was the first real friend that Heero had ever had. Duo, who had taught him everything he'd ever needed to know about comics and ice cream, cartoons and Internet porn. Or being a friend.
Heero had known about fighting, more then he ever wanted to know, but Duo had known about people. It was always Duo, who attracted the crowds. Heero had watched, as Duo had been whirled away, into this group, or that one. Although, always, back then, Duo had whirled Heero away with him. And Heero had been happy to go, basking in Duo's presence like the sun, drinking up all that warmth and humour. So different to anyone he'd known before.
No matter which school they hid out in, by the end of the first day, Duo’s desk was always surrounded by a crowd, between classes, both boys and girls. At first, Heero would grit his teeth and ignore them, and Duo. Ignore his classmates, because they weren't worth his time, and Duo, because he could hardly hit him, without blowing his cover. Heero would try to study, blocking the giggles and chatter with his fingers, but always gave up in the end, feeling Duo’s pencil poking him in the back. Or Duo’s finger, or, occasionally, Duo’s eraser bouncing off his head. Then Heero would sigh, and turn around, and Duo would chatter to him about random things, like the latest movie, or song, or what was for lunch. Somehow, Duo managed to keep track of that sort of stuff, even in the middle of a war, and lunch was always important to Duo.
And gradually, Duo’s crowd would send out a feeler to include Heero’s desk as well, absorbing him into it. And, reluctantly, he would let himself be absorbed. And later, there had been the other pilots. But no matter how many new people Heero met, Duo remained his best friend. He didn't need anyone else. He had Duo.
The rain was bucketing down now, even heavier, if that was possible, and reluctantly, Heero eased off on the accelerator, leaning forward to peer through the windscreen.
"Would you like me to drive for a bit?" Duo shifted beside him.
"No," said Heero baldly. He wanted to arrive in one piece, thanks very much. Duo subsided back into his seat with a sigh, drumming his fingers softly against his thigh.
"You could check the map." Heero relented. "Unless you know where we’re going?" He’d thought that there should be a turn-off, but the roads had all been heading in the wrong direction so far.
"Well I had a look before I left home but…yeah." Duo shrugged his shoulders. "Is it in here?" Without waiting for an answer, he opened the glove box, and fished out the map. "It’s a bit wrinkled." He eyed it critically. "You’ve folded it wrong."
"No I haven't." Heero was defensive. "It doesn’t fit any other way. And I don’t use it much. Normally, Satellite Navigation’s enough, but this blackout seems to be effecting everything."
Duo unfolded the map and peered at it, frowning. "Figures," he said. "The bit that we need is right in the crease, where it’s ripped. And all the writing’s rubbed off. I think…" He squinted. And frowned. "Heero that's coffee. Anyway…I think you have to take the next left. That should bring us up onto the highway."
Carefully, Heero downshifted and took the turn, flicking on the headlights, and trying not to think about how much this felt like being back in the war, back when they'd go on missions and do stuff together.
When they'd joined Preventors together, Heero had expected it to stay the same. Partners. Best friends. Silly really. But it hadn't taken long before Duo started to drift away. He supposed that it wasn't surprising really. After the war ended, they were free to make their own friends, and Heero had always known that he wasn't sociable enough for Duo.
Not exciting enough. Not entertaining enough.
It had taken some months to sort out the roster for Relena's security detail. By that time, it hadn't been a huge surprise to Heero when Duo wasn't partnered with him. When Duo wasn't even on the roster.
Except that Relena had taken him to task over it. Demanded to know what he'd done to upset Duo, in a tone of voice that made him glad that she believed in Total Pacifism.
He'd realised by the look on her face that she hadn't meant to tell him that Duo had asked for the transfer.
+++
"You need to hang a right at the next T-junction." Duo leaned forward and fiddled with the dash. "Do you mind if I put the heater on?"
Heero checked the gauge. The outside temperature was dropping, as they climbed into the hills, and he knew from bitter experience, mainly involving a borrowed pillow, that Duo's hair would stay wet, until he un-braided it. Duo must be cold.
He glanced at him. Worried a fingernail, and wondered if he should offer him his jacket.
Duo was dressed in Heero's black t-shirt and jeans. No Preventors jacket, because Heero hadn’t had a spare one. He didn’t need many, because he was mainly with Relena. Duo was still wearing his own sodden combat boots, his feet being quite a bit larger than Heero's. Once upon a time, Duo had teased him that big feet meant that Duo was going to be much taller than Heero, but that had not yet happened. There had also been some other stuff, about big hands and big noses, which Duo had thought was absolutely hilarious, but Heero couldn't comment whether that had happened, not having seen Duo naked since that one brief glimpse, in the shower on Peacemillion. Judging by the clothes, they were still pretty much the same size, now that they were eighteen. Just taller.
Although Duo had filled out, too. Still slender, but hard and tight with muscle, his biceps swelling with the curve of his arm. Broad shoulders that looked as if he was still growing into them. Heero wondered if his old, black t-shirt looked as good on him as it did on Duo. Probably not. On Duo, it looked edible. On Duo, it looked…
Looking at Duo, Heero's stomach seemed to flip over, in a way that it hadn't done for two years, and he had to look away, swallowing hard
Clenching the wheel, he tried to concentrate on the white lines unreeling in the headlights, and fought to control his sudden intake of breath, terrified that Duo would hear it.
It wasn't so much that he'd forgotten how good Duo looked. He'd just locked it away, in a corner of his mind labelled 'Duo', and refused to think about it.
Duo was still poring over the map, humming softly. His cross swang forward out of his shirt as he leaned, and he ran his fingers absently along the thick, black string that held it. String or… Curiously, Heero peered closer. Ribbon. It was a black, velvet ribbon.
"I thought you always had a chain for that thing," said Heero, desperately needing to fill the silence. Duo's cross was sacrosanct. He'd never taken it off, that Heero could remember, and it had always swung from an old-fashioned, silver chain.
He remembered it vividly, hanging against Duo's wiry chest as he undressed in their shared dorm room. Gleaming, pale as moonglow, when he'd looked across to Duo in the night. Crystal water droplets, beading on it after Duo's shower, slipping from the cross onto smooth, pale skin and down… Heero shivered, and forced his eyes back on the road. Wondered, desperately, how much further to St Claire.
"Yeah," said Duo thoughtfully, smoothing the velvet gently, between thumb and forefinger. "I used to have a chain. But it broke, and I wanted to use the ribbon. It was kinda precious…" Voice trailing off into silence, he looked away from Heero, staring out of the side window.
"Oh," said Heero, hating the sarcastic tone of his voice, but hating Duos wistfulness even more. Hating the thought of someone else giving Duo presents, of Duo thinking about them, missing them, whoever they were, even though Heero knew that he should be happy that Duo had friends. "From a friend I suppose?"
"Yeah." Duo turned to look at Heero oddly. "Someone who was important to me. I do have some friends you know Heero."
Oh. Heero tightened his grip on the wheel, glaring straight ahead through the rain-smeared windshield. A boyfriend probably. Heero's stomach twisted savagely. Duo had had lots of boyfriends. At least that was what he'd heard. Special agents gossiped as much as high-school girls. It was all that down-time between missions. And Duo was the kind of person that people gossiped about. Not that it was any of Heero’s business, how popular Duo Maxwell was, or whom he was popular with. Or where. Duo had always been popular.
Heero had ached with jealousy, thinking of Duo with Seth, or Jake, or whoever it was supposed to be now. Had avoided the toilet on the third floor at Preventors, which had several messages about Duo Maxwell and Seth, or Jake, or whoever. Heero supposed that he was jealous of Duo, who seemed to be able to blend into a normal life, where Heero hadn’t. That Duo had a boyfriend, had love, where Heero didn’t.
Jealous of Seth, or Jake, or whoever it was, that they had Duo, when Heero didn’t.
Jealous, because he wanted Duo.
Had always wanted Duo.
Would always want him, just a little, no matter what.
Heero had wanted Duo from the first moment he saw him, when Duo shot him. There was no one else like Duo. He'd been cute, back then, and cute had grown into irresistibly hot, as he got older. Duo made Heero's heart pound and his mouth go dry, just to look at him. To think of him and…
Sharing a dorm room with him had been torment. Duo was gorgeous, and sexy, and completely lacking in any sort of modesty, with the cutest butt that a wide-eyed Heero had ever seen.
And a beautiful smile. Not the wide grin that he normally hid behind, but gentler. Happy and trusting. A smile that was just for Heero.
But, in the war, it was never the right time to say anything, and it wasn't until after the war that he'd been sure that Duo was gay. But, by then, when Heero thought that maybe it was the right time, Duo was not there any more.
Was not his partner, was never in the office, didn’t ring, didn’t visit, didn’t…do anything.
Maybe Duo had known that Heero wanted him. Maybe that was why he’d started avoiding Heero, so that he wouldn't have to let him down. After all, he could have anyone. There was no reason why he would want Heero.
"Hey Heero… Heero! Oi!!"
Duo flapped the map at him with a crack of paper, and Heero jumped, and glared at him. It was getting hard to hear over the drumming rain on the roof. It was torrential, now. And was that thunder? Hell.
Duo had the map folded into a small rectangle, showing lots of squiggly dotted lines and densely packed contours, and Heero eyed it with foreboding, sidelong, his other eye on the road.
Duo was looking at him hopefully, eyebrows raised. "Do you mind a bit of dirt? It's quicker. Bit windy maybe…"
"How much dirt?" Asked Heero suspiciously. Duo could never resist a short cut, even if it was a narrow, winding goat track, on the side of a cliff, that took twice as long as the highway. Said that nice, straight roads sent him to sleep. Heero liked nice, straight roads, that took him directly to where he wanted to go, so that he could sleep when he got there.
"Umm…hmm…" Duo counted, sucking his forefinger thoughtfully, in a way that Heero thought was hot as hell. He looked away. "30 kilometres?"
"No," said Heero, shifting in his seat and watching the road.
"Oh okay. Fine then," said Duo. "Go the long way round. See if I care. Go right."
Heero went right.
Duo hummed, and rested his foot on his knee and tapped out a syncopated rhythm on his combat boot.
His knee brushed against the back of Heero's hand every time Heero changed gears, sending small electric jolts up Heero's arm, and Heero put both hands firmly on the wheel.
Maybe, Duo had had no idea that Heero wanted him so much, and there was some other reason why he kept away from Heero.
But that was almost worse.
Almost.
It made something twist inside him, to think that he might have upset Duo somehow, enough to make him avoid Heero. Heero didn't want anything to hurt Duo.
Had spent an entire war trying to protect him. Worrying about him. Breaking him out of jail and patching him up after missions. Had cannibalised his gundam, to keep him on the ground. Had even broken two of his ribs, to make sure that he wouldn't follow Heero into danger. Heero shuddered just to think about it, even now.
He couldn’t seem to stop caring for Duo. Worrying about Duo. Wanting Duo to be happy. It wasn’t just that Duo was loyal, and clever, and fun, and a great friend. Once. Duo was also stubborn, and wilful, and very annoying, all the time. But still, Heero had to look out for him. It was something in Heero that went far deeper than just wanting Duo. He supposed that meant that he loved Duo.
He really, really loved Duo.
Damn.
+++
The rain wasn't letting up, and, now, it was accompanied by drifts of fog, that whisped between the tall trees hemming the road. Rivulets of brown water cut tracks into the muddy shoulder of the road.
Heero slowed the car to below the speed limit, resigned to a slow trip. There was no way they were going to make it to St Claire in two hours. He slowed further, as the road rose and then dipped down steeply. Leaning forward, he peered into the darkness, his eyes widening at the unexpected warning sign.
"Damn," he muttered. "The river."
Duo was poring over the map, still humming under his breath. "Great. That means we're on the right track."
"Yeah but…" The car rolled to a stop.
"Hey!" Duo looked up and his eyes widened. "Where's the bridge?"
"There isn't one." Absently, Heero worried the band around his wrist, stretching it out and letting it snap back, as he stared at the racing stream, flattened and spreading beyond its low banks. He could just dimly make out the far bank, in the light of the headlights. Rain churned the surface of the water like machine gun fire."I can see that!!" Said Duo. "How the heck are we supposed to get across?! It's flooded! Look at it! The bridge must have washed out!"
Heero sighed. "Duo it’s a ford."
"A what?" Duo eyed him curiously
"A ford. A crossing without a bridge. And it's flooded."
"Yeah." Duo eyed the torrent with a jaundiced eye. "I can see that. Damn." He scrubbed his face with his hands. "That's what that word was in the wrinkly bit on the map. I thought that it said ferry."
"Well it's not. It's a ford. And we can't get across." Heero felt obliged to make sure that Duo knew that, emphasised with a healthy snap of elastic.
"Yeah. I know." said Duo, appearing from behinds his hands. He bit his lip. "You told me." Abruptly, he grinned. " Damn! Everything's so complicated on Earth! Sort of stuff that used to happen to us back in the war."
Silently, Heero agreed. This was just the sort of thing that used to happen to them back in the war. Just like the old days, when they were partners.
Irritation warred with a comfortable warmth, that he hadn't felt in far too long. Heero had never felt so conflicted in his life, torn between overwhelming desires, to either strangle Duo or kiss him senseless. Unfortunately, he could do neither.
All he could do was turn the car around.
They'd just have to find another road.
Carefully, he placed his hands on the steering wheel, without either banging his head against it, or punching it. Or Duo.
"Gee. It's really bucketing down. Hear that thunder!!" Duo leaned forward to peer up at the sky through the windscreen, side-lit by a brilliant flash of electricity. "Hey! That's lightning! Woah!!! That was close!! Check it out! Hey!!!" Lightning forked, and Duo twisted to peer behind them, clinging to the back of his seat. "That hit that tree!!! Holy…"
Ponderously, the tree toppled towards them, slowly at first, then picking up speed and groaning as it fell.
Duo shoved Heero towards the door and scrambled from the car.
…SHIT!!! Heero!!! Run!!!"
Arms pumping, they sprinted from the car, towards the river. Heero stumbled, and Duo dragged him to his feet, falling and tripping, heart racing madly. They ran on.
A thunderous crash shook the earth behind them, just as they reached the flat sheet of water, and Heero jerked as if he'd been hit. For a moment he thought his heart had stopped. In tandem, they slowed to a stop, spinning to look behind them. Heero panted and coughed, lungs on fire in the cold air. He squinted into the headlights, at the dark mountain of tree that loomed behind his car. Damn.. It looked as if it had only just missed the car. Probably by a few car lengths. He shuddered in reaction, heart racing, and turned to Duo.
"Holy shit!!!" Hands on his knees, shuddering and gasping for breath, Duo’s eyes were as wide as saucers, staring back at the enormous tree. It’s ghostly trunk was higher than the roof of the car. "That was a close one! Nearly got your car buddy! Geez! Earth!” He grinned and shook his head. "Kinda makes you glad that they don’t have things like that back on the colonies!"
Grimly, Heero shoved his sodden hair off his face, and walked back to the fallen tree, picking his way through a carpet of leaves and twigs and broken branches. The trunk had missed the road, but the crown of the tree had fallen right across it, and the road was completely blocked by the tangle of branches. Tentatively Heero cat-footed out onto the muddy shoulder of the road, and nearly sank to his ankle, red clay sucking to the sole of his shoe. He scraped his foot against the asphalt, frowning. There was no way he could drive around the tree. They'd get bogged.
And they couldn't go forward across the river.
Duo appeared at his shoulder and whistled softly, staring at the tree.
"Looks like we're stuck buddy."
+++
Duo sighed and shut his cell phone with a snap, putting it down on the dashboard.
"That was Une. She said they're sending someone out to clear the road, but it could take a while. There's trees down all over the place. And she said that she’ll send out another team for Jex. You can question him back at the office. Hell!" Duo scrubbed his hands over his face. "What a waste of time!! Oh well." He took his hands away, grinning at Heero. "Just another day in the office eh hero-boy?"
Heero nodded, gazing out of the window into the darkness. He'd turned the headlights off, but left the car running, so that they could have the heater and interior light. It was going to get pretty cold if the road crew didn't arrive soon. Shirtless and sopping, they were huddled into a towel each, their shirts spread behind them on the back seat to dry.
Towel dangling like a cape, Duo twisted around to lean over the back seat, and rummaged in his duffel bag, and Heero smiled faintly, watching his reflection. Duo always had a stash of food and drink somewhere. Almost had a phobia about being without, and when they'd been working together during the war, he'd started to pack snacks for Heero as well. Chocolate bars and soda for Duo, packets of chips and iced tea for Heero. Heero had always preferred iced tea to soda, to Duo's disgust, but, with Duo's help, he’d nurtured a guilty passion for other kinds of junk food.
Duo sat back and popped his soda, and Heero almost grinned. Some things never changed.
"Want one?" Duo held out an iced tea and Heero stared at it, and him, in surprise. Duo had remembered.
"Thanks," he said, taking the can, and they drank in warm, companionable silence.
As he drank, Duo played with the ribbon around his neck, clutching it in his fist and rubbing the dark velvet between his thumb and forefinger, staring absently through the windscreen.
Now that he had leisure to look closely, Heero saw that the velvet was flattened and shiny from constant rubbing, even a little bare in some spots. Duo obviously fiddled with the ribbon, the way that he had once fidgeted with his braid. Whoever had given it to him must have been very important. Definitely a boyfriend.
The warm glow, from the gift of iced tea, disappeared.
"Hadn't you better ring your boyfriend?" he asked, trying to sound nonchalant, but only sounding grumpy, even to himself. He gritted his teeth, as Duo turned to look at him, startled.
"What boyfriend?"
"Oh," said Heero. "I thought… Well…What about your flatmates?"
"Naah." Duo finished his soda and crushed the can, twisting to slip it into the plastic bag with his wet clothes. "I'm in Preventors barracks. I've never really found anyone that I wanted to share with. I'm kinda hard to get along with you know."
"Oh." Heero digested that. He didn't know. He'd never had any trouble getting along with Duo. But maybe it was different now. Quite likely, Duo wanted to be able to stay out late and have wild parties or something, which might not suit a roommate. Silently, Heero drank his tea, trying to adjust his mental image of Duo, to picture Duo all alone. This was not what he'd expected at all. He'd imagined Duo cosily settled with Seth, or Jake, or whoever it was.
"And at least in the barracks there's other people around. Even though they're not right there."
Heero nodded. Duo had always liked to surround himself with a gang of people, in a way that Heero had never been able to understand. Heero hated to be around other people. Except Duo.
"…and it's handy to Saint Pats."
"Oh?" said Heero curiously, wondering why Duo would want to be near a church. Duo had never been particularly religious, despite the priest's collar that he'd worn during the war. Heero had long ago come to the conclusion that that was probably some sort of disguise. Or, maybe, just the only clothes that Duo had been able to scrounge. Unlike him, Duo had not had a ready supply of funds from Dr J.
"Yeah." Duo sighed and stretched, before wrapping his arms around his knees and curling into his seat again. "The refuge. I help out there whenever I get time. Weekends and so on. Saturday's are usually the busiest. A lot of people have drunk their pension money by then."
Oh. Covertly, Heero eyed Duo, trying to reconcile Duo's life with what he remembered of Duo. Duo had loved people, and fun and lots of action. Parties, and mischief, and chaotic games of basketball, where Duo was usually the star of the show. This did not sound like the Duo that Heero remembered at all. Heero did not want this for Duo. This Duo sounded as lonely as Heero was.
"But what about…" Heero stopped. He wanted to ask what about having fun, and ‘hanging out’ and all the other things that Duo used to like to do, but instead he asked, "What about your partner?"
Heero knew Agent Amber by name, because he was Duo’s partner, and appeared on the roster sheets, although not by sight. Jealously, he thought that Agent Amber would probably love to spend a lazy Saturday afternoon with Duo, helping out a bit, and then going out, or whatever it was that they did afterwards. "Agent Amber. Does he help out too?"
"Marko?!?" Duo rocked back in his seat, laughing, and Heero basked in the familiar riot of sound, captivated and charmed, almost forgetting to listen.
"Naah." Duo sat back up, and grinned. "Tony Markowitz is a good catholic, with a wife and seven kids. Oops. Eight kids," he corrected himself, still grinning broadly. "Heck." He shook his head. "That means I owe him another present. Naaah. Marko’s a good bloke, but he’s got no time for that kind of stuff. Charity really begins at home for him! Guy’s always asking me to bring him some soup. Says Josie can’t cook for peanuts. Poor girl's probably got no time for cooking," he added, grinning. "Soup!" He shook his head again. "You know? Soup kitchen? Funny ha ha. Guy’s got a sense of humour, I’ll say that for him."
"Oh." Said Heero. It sounded like Duo was fond of his partner, but he didn’t hang out with him either. Heero ached for Duo. He wanted Duo to be having fun, with friends, even if they weren’t Heero. He wanted Duo to be happy. Duo didn’t sound very happy to him. He tried to think what to say next. He wasn’t very good at being tactful, it wasn’t a skill that either Dr J, or Odin, had thought that he needed, but he didn’t want Duo to think that he was being critical of his life either. Duo could be very proud sometimes. Carefully, he chose his words. "You sound very busy. Do you have time for anything else?"
"Naaaah. Not really." Duo didn’t look offended, and Heero let out his breath with relief. "When I’m not at the refuge I’ve got homework. Doesn’t leave much time for anything else."
"Homework!" Heero smiled. He couldn’t help it. "Duo you hated school. Why are you doing homework?"
"Mmm. Well…" Duo was looking down, and clutching his ribbon again, his cheeks dusted with pink. Heero thought that he looked adorable. "I want to make something of my life Heero. And to do that, I need an education. It’s taken a while to catch up though. I kinda missed a bit of school, what with the war and all."
"I could help," offered Heero eagerly, before he could stop himself, compelled by his age-old compulsion to help Duo. He blushed fiery red. Duo didn’t want his help. Didn’t want anything to do with him.
"Thanks Heero." Duo’s smile was soft, and he let go of the ribbon to pat Heero’s leg gently. "But you’re busy with your own stuff. You’re at Calvin U aren’t you? And looking after Relena. How is she?" he asked politely.
Heero blinked, wondering how Duo knew what University he was studying at. "Relena's fine," he said, smiling a little. "She works too hard and doesn't eat enough. She thinks that the peace will collapse without her."
"Hmm," Duo snickered. "Same as Quatre. Someone should get those two together."
"I don’t think that Wufei would like that," said Heero seriously, and Duo grinned.
"Naaah. Probably not. Or Trowa!"
"She asks about you sometimes," said Heero softly. "Where you are. What you're doing. " It was hard to admit that even Relena had noticed that he and Duo were not close any more.
"Well now you can tell her," said Duo. "You’ve asked lots about me. You haven’t told me anything about you yet." He was curled sideways into his seat, cheek pillowed on the back, face tilted to watch Heero. Curious and intent, his eyes roamed Heero's face in the darkness.
"No." Heero stared back solemnly. "I wanted to know what you were doing." He wanted to know everything about Duo, now that he had this chance, before Duo disappeared out of his life again.
"Oh." Again, that soft smile and pat. "That’s nice."
Duo had always touched Heero more than anyone else. Hung over his shoulder, or tickled him, or grabbed him by the hand, or arm, to drag him somewhere. Duo was always dragging Heero somewhere. Initially, Heero had hit him, or pushed him away, but Duo had kept doing it regardless, seemingly unable to stop. It was just something that Duo did, touching Heero, and Heero had come to accept it, with all the other things that went to make up his best friend. Had missed it, when he stopped seeing Duo. Absently, he wondered if anyone else had touched him recently. Apart from Relena. But that was different. Motherly, maybe, although he didn't really know what that was like.
“But it’s your turn now.” Duo was still watching Heero intently. “Is your course going well? Sounds like you’re having fun with Queenie…”
Heero didn’t think that he could tell Duo that he was miserable. He searched for something to say that might interest Duo. “I am working on the Mars data with a grad student. Zechs is my contact. It’s odd. I taught Relena Poker.” He corrected himself. “Texas Wildcard Poker. Like you showed me. We play on the shuttle.” Duo had his fist tucked under his chin with a handful of ribbon, and was nodding to himself. “And I got shot when we were on L3.”
“Damn! That sucks!” Duo grimaced in sympathy. “Me too. I’d forgotten how much it hurts.”
What?! Heero jerked upright.
"Where! Show me!"
The command was out before Heero could stop it. Mortified, he blushed furiously, looking away and reminding himself sternly that this wasn't the war, when he needed to bandage Duo; to tell him to hold still, to stop being such a baby, to take his antibiotics. To ride roughshod over him, when Duo tried to brush him aside, because, sometimes, Duo needed looking after. Duo had never taken care of himself properly. Had sometimes acted as if he thought he deserved to be hurt. To be punished for something.
But that was then, and now, Duo had other people to look after him.
"Sorry," said Heero miserably, cursing his ridiculous protectiveness, hands locked in his lap. Fingers feigning an interest in the snap and twirl of his wristband. "I didn’t mean…I just wanted to check that you…that it was…. I… Sorry."
Unhappily, he peered out the window.
Hell.
Duo blinked at him.
"No. No it’s okay Heero. No problem. I don’t mind."
Calmly he unbuttoned his jeans.
What??!
Open-mouthed, Heero stared, shocked and speechless, instantly hot with shame and desire, as Duo paused to push up his towel, baring the smooth ripples of a six pack. Wriggled and arched up off the seat, lithe as a cat.
"Damn," said Duo, writhing sinuously, and Heero’s face flamed. “Damn jeans’re impossible when they're wet." Thumbs in the waistband, Duo wrestled them over slim hips, and peeled down his black boxer briefs, just far enough to bare the smooth skin of his thigh.
Heero swallowed, hard.
Duo’s pubic hair was a soft chestnut, just a little darker than his thick braid. The skin of his hip, smooth and white against the light tan of his flat belly. Duo had a tan. Heero had never seen Duo with a tan before. But last time Heero had seen Duo’s body, it hadn’t looked anything like this. Back then, you could count every rib. Back then, Duo had been cute. Now he was gorgeous.
Wide-eyed and open-mouthed,. Heero stared.
A puckered red scar marred the pale skin of Duo’s thigh, round and shiny, and flanked by small, red dots. Desperately seeking distraction, Heero counted them. Six. Only six stitches. That was good. That was very good. That was…
Frantically, Heero struggled for something to say, unable to say any of the things that sprang to mind, like …can I… would you… what if I… Duo please… please Duo…
Instead… "Boxer briefs?" Duo had always worn boxers, back in the war.
"Yeah. Kinda reminded me of you. Spandex you know?" Duo’s voice sounded odd, but Heero couldn’t look away to check his expression, mesmerised by Duo’s torso so temptingly bared before him.
"Does it hurt?" Heero struggled to keep his voice even and matter of fact. To remember to breathe. Biting his lip, he clenched his fists so that he wouldn’t be tempted to touch that perfect body.
"Naah. Hurt like heck at the time but not any more. You can touch if you want."
Shocked, Heero’s gaze jerked up to Duo’s eyes. Did Duo know…?
"You can. I don’t mind." Solemnly, Duo gazed back. Inched his briefs down further to reveal more pale skin. More muscled thigh.
Heero stared back, his heart pounding frantically, suddenly unable to breathe, his fingers uncurling and stretching towards Duo, almost without his volition.
Oh God. Would Duo let him… Was Duo going to…
If he touched Duo now, he wouldn’t be able to stop. He couldn’t. He just couldn’t. Would have to have more and more, until he had all of Duo. Would take more, want more…
And did Duo really want him to? Did he know that Heero wanted more? Surely he would say something if he did.
Duo had never been shy, back when they shared a room. What if he was just offering because he thought that Heero was worried about his leg? Which he was, but…
What if Duo wasn't really gay? What if Heero had based his entire adult life on some horrible misunderstanding, based on five minutes in the Preventor toilets on the third floor?
Or…what if it was a game? Heero’s stomach churned sickly. One of Duo’s jokes. Heero had never understood jokes, the way that Duo had.
What if he was just playing with Heero, wanting to see how far he could make him go before he pushed him away? Heero didn’t think that he could bear to be pushed away.
"It’s okay Heero," Duo said softly, easing the taut fabric down a little further. "I don’t mind. Status check. Yeah?"
Status? Always, they would ask each other that, after each shared mission. As they collapsed into their room, beaten, and bruised, and dirty and afraid.
Trembling, Heero’s fingers hovered over Duo’s thigh.
Status check Duo.
Ever so gently, he stroked one finger over the mark.
"Does that hurt?" Heero whispered, eyes on his gently moving finger. “Don’t let me hurt you…”
"No…" Duo’s answering whisper was caught somewhere in his throat. "You can press harder if you like …"
Reverently, Heero placed his palm over the mark, cupping Duo’s thigh. Duo’s skin felt so much silkier and smoother than Heero’s skin. Or maybe that was just because it was Duo. Gently, hardly daring to move, he stroked his thumb across Duo’s hip, and Duo’s belly vibrated like a harp string.
With dawning wonder, Heero watched the undulations of Duo’s belly. Duo liked it. He liked Heero touching him.
Experimentally, he explored the exposed skin of Duo’s thigh; slowly down, and then back up over the crest of Duo’s hip, to rest on the heat of Duo’s quivering belly, and Duo gasped. Heero flushed hotly and shifted in his seat. Burned with the need to hear more and better sounds from Duo. Eagerly, he leant across the gear stick and it was as if he was falling through water, sinking down to press his lips to the scar. Duo trembled beneath him and that was good, but he wanted more, so he opened his mouth, sucking and licking the smooth skin, then pressed hot sucking kisses up onto his stomach. Duo gasped and undulated beneath him, with little breathy moans, and fascinated, heady with power, Heero stroked his tongue over Duo’s hip, then bit down gently. Duo jerked and whimpered.
“Heero…”
Vaguely, Heero was aware that Duo was trying to touch him back, petting him, stroking his shoulder and hair, but mainly Heero was hard and aching with the knowledge that he was the one doing this to Duo. That it was him making Duo make those maddening, intoxicating noises. That he was pleasing Duo. All he’d ever wanted was to please Duo. He wanted to do more. Wanted Duo helpless and desperate for him.
There had to be more…
Carefully, blood roaring in his ears like the drumming rain, he peeled down Duo’s briefs, and Duo gasped and shivered, fingers finding their way into his hair…
“Oh…oh God…Heero… Heero Heero please…”
+++
Uncomfortably twisted, gear stick digging into his hip, Heero Yuy had never imagined that anything could be so euphoric.
Overwhelmed and astounded, aching with love and desire, he pressed fervent kisses into Duo’s stomach, not sure what to do next. Duo’s fingers were still loosely twined into his hair, but…was that it? Should he kiss Duo? Could they do more? Would Duo even want to do more?
Would he ever want to do this again, or was Duo going to disappear from Heero’s life after tonight, just like before?
Panic-stricken, Heero clung tighter and press his face into the sweat-sheened skin, clinging to Duo’s scent and feel and salty taste. Warm and soft and hard all at once. Sticky, damp curls glued to Heero’s cheek. Duo's stomach still rippled with his shuddering breaths and Heero burrowed into it, unwilling to lift his head and see the end in Duo’s eyes.
"Shit!" Duo laughed breathlessly above him. " Heero! The road gang. They're here!" He tugged at Heero's hair, dragging Heero up to blink stupidly at the lights blazing through the back window.
"Holy shit! Hell! Shit!!!" Duo was giggling and squirming underneath him, trying to drag his pants back on. Duo bucked beneath him, and Heero dazedly realised that he still had his hand planted in the middle of Duo' stomach. He jerked upright, and wriggled stiffly back into his seat.
Hell..
He snatched his shirt from the back seat.
“If I help it will be quicker…”
Still completely unable to face Duo, Heero grabbed the opportunity to escape, and flung the door open, scrambling out into the rain.
The road gang were already hard at work in the light of the headlights, chain-sawing limbs, and setting out witch's hats and warning signs.
Heero trudged across and offered to help, but they waved him away, citing insurance, and liability, so he stepped out of the way, and stood watching, hands thrust deep into the pockets of his jeans, until he was distracted by a Preventors jacket being thrust under his nose.
Duo stood beside him, shoulders hunched against the rain.
Heero glanced at him sidelong. Duo's hair looked as if it was melting into his eyes, the t-shirt as if it was painted on. "You have it," said Heero gruffly.
"Naah. I'm okay," said Duo, and waited until Heero put it on.
The rain lanced down in the headlights, a wall of silver spears. The buzz of the chainsaw drowned out everything except Duo's low voice.
"I've missed you Heero," said Duo softly.
What?? Heero turned to stare at Duo, suddenly overwhelmed with old hurt and confusion. And anger. Duo had left him, not the other way around. He would never have left Duo.
"But I was there! You could have found me! You could have…" Words clamoured and tumbled from his mouth, and Heero took a deep breath and swiped rain from his face. That was not what he needed to say.
"Why did we stop being friends Duo?"
"We were too different Heero." Duo fiddled with his necklace. "It could never work out."
"But it wasn't a problem during the war!" Heero struggled to understand. "We were a team!"
A great team. Not very often, but when they'd worked together it had been like the purr of a well-tuned engine. Unstoppable.
"Yeah…" Duo clutched his ribbon tightly. "…but that was all gonna change in peacetime."
"Why?" Heero glared at him. "Why did it have to change?"
"Well…you were gonna be doing different things. Seeing different people."
"What? Who?" Heero stared at him in bewilderment. Duo was the one who had done those things.
"Well…Relena for one. You were hanging out with the princess and stuff, going to balls and all, and there was no way that she was gonna want me hanging around. I just don't fit in with that kind of crowd. You do Heero." Duo smiled at him warmly. "You're amazing. You can do anything."
"So can you!" Said Heero hotly. Nobody was more amazing, or better at blending in than Duo. Duo could do anything that he put his mind to.
"Relena was always asking for you." Duo stared into space. "To escort her to some ball. Eating with all those posh people. Dancing. You were a great dancer Heero. Still are," he added softly.
"But I could have taught you to do that!" Heero protested furiously, brushing Duo's compliment aside. Dr J had made sure that Heero could do all that stuff, in case he needed it for infiltration, and, earlier, Odin had demanded it as well, because it was always very important to blend in. And he certainly wouldn't have let a younger Heero eat with sloppy table manners, no matter how tired that little boy had been. "And anyway Relena likes you! You know that. She wouldn't care. She's not like that. She doesn't mind about...about…table manners and so on. You know she doesn't!"
"Yeah," said Duo softly, back to playing with the ribbon. "But I would. I know she's not like that Heero. And it's not just how to use a fork, or stuff like that. I mean…it'd be a synch to learn that stuff really. But… I used to watch you dancing with her. Back in the early days. When we were all guarding her before she got her own security detail. You looked so perfect together. Waltzing and stuff. You were the handsome prince and I was just some scruffy kid who needed you to do his tie." He grimaced, looking away. "You were both sitting there, trying to decide which University courses you were going to do, and I'd hardly even been in school. Maths was okay. I'm good at that. But I could hardly read until I met Professor G Heero!"
Heero blinked at him, wondering why he'd never realised that before. Dr J had made him stick with his schoolwork, but Duo had led a nomadic existence for most of his life. Duo was smart, and clever, clever enough to hide his lack of schooling, but that wouldn't be enough to get him into higher education.
The road patrol had finished clearing branches, and were packing up, throwing equipment into the truck with a metallic clang, obviously in a hurry to move on.
Heero ached for the pain that he could hear in Duo's voice. He remembered that time.
Heero had been excited, to finally be making his own choices. Had spent hours with Relena, checking course outcomes, and pre-requisites, and alternative pathways. Duo had been there, hovering somewhere in the background. It was just before he'd gone back to Preventors Ops. He'd made some crack about Safe-cracking 101 and then disappeared somewhere…
Heero clenched his fists. "So what? You're one of the cleverest people I know Duo."
"We were just too different Heero. You were making something of your life and I couldn't follow you. We were just going to drift further and further apart." Duo looked away, and Heero strained to hear him. "I figured that it'd be better if I just got it over with. Do it on my own terms. Save breaking my heart further down the track."
What?!! Heero stared, appalled that Duo had done something so terrible to him. To both of them. Duo wasn't happy either.
In the rain, Duo's profile was pale, and beautiful, and solemn as a statue, dark tendrils of hair painting sinuous patterns.
"And I was glad that you had such a good friend Heero. Somewhere to fit in. You were going to be someone important. I didn't want to spoil that for you. The rest of us all had other stuff, but you didn't. You'd always seemed so alone."
Heero thought about that, listening to the slam of doors and the roar of an engine as the road gang drove away. He supposed it was true. Duo had gone to the Sweepers, and Hilde, between wars. Quatre had his family and the Maganacs. The entire Winner empire. And Trowa had the circus and Wufei had a clan to rebuild, but…
"I had you!" Said Heero hotly, wishing that Duo would look at him. "You were my best friend. I didn't need anyone else." And he hadn't. "Just you! How could you think you would spoil anything?!"
"You were my best friend too Heero." At last, Duo turned to face him, solemn and serious. "And you wouldn't have wanted me hanging around. I'd just have dragged you down."
Heero stared at him, feeling a horrified twisting in his gut, to think that Duo had done this to him deliberately.
"Duo I could never not want you. I loved you! I'll always love you and you left me!!!"
Rain poured between them.
Sluiced down Duo's face, and into his open mouth, and his wide, shocked eyes.
Numb and cold, Heero stepped towards the car, fumbling for his keys with frozen fingers.
He'd shocked Duo. Upset him. He'd never wanted to upset Duo.
His car was covered with a blanket of torn leaves. He hadn't noticed before.
The tree was cleared, they could back out now, they should go, if only he could just find the right damned key…
He had his hand on the door handle, about to pull open the door, when he felt a touch on his arm.
"Heero…"
Cold fingers locked around his arm and spun him around, Duo's mouth finding his, ice cold momentarily, and then hot and hard and demanding, licking and sucking, Duo’s tongue setting fire to Heero's chilled skin. Duo pressed up against him and Heero stumbled backwards willingly, and slammed against the car door, locking his arms around Duo and opening his mouth eagerly for Duo's seeking tongue, shaking with love and desire.
Duo was touching him everywhere, kissing him frantic and fast, holding Heero in place with his body and his hard thigh, and it was so good, Heero couldn't focus, couldn't think, desperate to touch Duo back, but unable to stop holding him and rocking helplessly against him. He wanted Duo so much. Needed Duo to touch him more than he’d ever needed anything else in his entire life.
“Oh god Heero…I…”And then Duo was sliding away from him, slithering downwards, and Heero moaned helplessly and his knees buckled and he tried to follow, lips clinging to his kiss with helpless adoration, eagerly seeking, trying to catch Duo's mouth with his, but Duo was holding him in place, Duo's hands pushing roughly against his clothes, Duo's voice, a desperate litany against his skin, soothing him with lips and hands and warm, stroking tongue...
"Shhhh… it's okay… it's okay Baby… I'll look after you… I'll take care of you… just let me… let me… it's okay… Heero…"
Duo's eyes seeking his, through his sodden fringe, the only spot of colour in the drowned world, laden with some unnamed emotion.
"Oh…oh God…I…I… Duo!!!" said Heero, arms wrapped around Duo's head, trying to pet and stroke as much of him as he could reach.
"Mmmmm…" said Duo lovingly, somewhere deep in his throat, and Heero shuddered uncontrollably and curled over him, clawed fingers scrabbling for purchase against Duo's slick back.
+++
Heero fell to his knees in the mud in front of Duo, blindly searching for his mouth and letting Duo support him with his strong hands and broad shoulders. The air was still cold, but Duo was surprisingly warm, and Duo's mouth was soft; so soft and warm and gentle as it explored his tenderly, all previous desperation washed away.
After a long time, Heero realised that mud was soaking into his knees, and Duo's hair smelled like wet dog. It had stopped raining. He supposed that his hair smelled like wet dog too, but he couldn't seem to care when Duo's tongue was tracing lazy patterns against his neck, leaving an alternating trail of hot and cold that made Heero shiver and shake. Duo's tongue found his ear and he shuddered uncontrollably. Duo released his ear with a sucking smack and pulled back just a little, to give him that gentle smile that Heero loved.
"Damn Heero. Take me home. I'm frozen."
+++
There was a sopping Preventors jacket on Heero Yuy's doorstep. Dirty shoes lay every which way in the hall, and a trail of clothes and muddy footprints led from the door, detoured past the refrigerator, via a pool of rice, and tracked up the stairs, stalling at Heero’s bathroom door.
With his responsibilities as host, Heero thought that Duo might like a shower, because Duo was shaking against him. And muddy, but mainly because he was worried that Duo must be frozen. But Duo had other ideas.
“No way,” said Duo, with a warm swipe of lips and tongue, trembling beneath Heero’s hands, as if he was hypothermic. “Bed first, then shower. Maybe. If we don’t do this soon I’m going to explode Heero Yuy. I’ve waited four years and I’m not waiting a second longer.”
Lips glued to Heero’s, fingers busy with his jeans, he shuffled him backwards towards the bed. Heero was perfectly willing to be manhandled, and allowed himself to be manoeuvred, but balked again as the back of his knees hit the mattress. He sat down with a thump.
"What's wrong?" asked Duo softly, reading Heero like a book. Kneeling in front of him, so that he could see up beneath Heero’s bangs, and kneading his thighs gently.
Heero stared at the floor unhappily.
"Lube," he said. Not that he minded so much for himself, he supposed; he had been shot, and tortured, and blown up out of his gundam, after all, but he wanted this to be perfect for Duo. "I don't have any lube or…"
"Oh. That's okay. I do," said Duo, turning back to fish in his jeans, "Comes in handy," and Heero chewed his lip and tried not to think about why Duo might find lube handy.
But then Duo was climbing onto him, and pushing him down onto the bed, spreading his legs apart and crawling between them with practised ease, and that was just the way it should be, because Heero had always learned new things with Duo, and it was everything that Heero had ever wanted, right there in his arms, and Heero held him, and clung to him, and thought that if he got any happier he just might die.
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Afterwards, Heero pulled Duo down until Duo rested against his chest, stroking his back, his hair, as much as he could reach, without relaxing the death-grip that he had on Duo, and Duo relaxed against him with a sigh of contentment, flushed and sweaty.
"Mmm…Heero…" Duo sighed happily, shifting around until he had his head nuzzled under Heero's chin, and his leg between Heero’s, his fingers contentedly wound in his necklace.
Heero gritted his teeth. That damned ribbon again.
Heero wanted to rip it off. Wanted to cut it into tiny pieces, and burn it up, and send the ashes into the sun with the gundams. He didn't want Duo to play with it now, when he was with Heero.
"Who gave it to you?" asked Heero, and Duo lifted his head in surprise. Heero winced at the bitterness in his voice, but was completely unable to help himself. He pressed on. "The ribbon," he said. Jealousy burned like fire in his gut. The ribbon, the lube… He couldn't share Duo with anyone. Not now. "You must have liked them a lot."
Duo stared at him solemnly, and Heero stared back. He had to know. The cross, he knew about. It was something important from Duo's childhood, and that was fine. But the ribbon was new. Who had been important enough that Duo treasured their gift? And, most importantly, where were they now? Were they…oh God…waiting at home for Duo? Surely not. But then, there was that handy tube of lube…
"Heero…" Duo's cheeks were faintly flushed. "You gave me the ribbon. It was a long time ago." He buried his face in Heero's chest, clutching the ribbon protectively. "I'm not surprised you don't remember."
What?
And, just like that, Heero remembered.
He and Duo, stuck on Peacemillion, just before the last battle, and Duo had run out of hair ties.
The last one had broken at breakfast, when Duo had accidentally sat on his braid, long silky strands wafting over his shoulder to get in his cereal and Heero's breakfast, eyes and mouth. And Duo had cursed, mopping cereal out of his hair with his shirt, and demanding of the world at large, how in the heck he was ever supposed to pilot a gundam when he was being strangled by his own damned hair. And Heero had pushed his breakfast safely away from Duo's hair, on his self-appointed mission to take care of Duo, and marched across to Sally Po, who happened to be the only girl in the canteen at the time, and demanded that she give him something to fix Duo's hair. Or at least a spare bandage, if nothing else.
Heero's face burned in recollection. Sally had laughed. And laughed even louder, when he'd told her defensively that it was preventative medicine. It had been completely mortifying. Worse than when she'd fished shrapnel out of his upper thigh. He wondered how he could possibly have forgotten.
But after she'd stopped laughing at him, she'd unhooked her glasses from around her neck. Heero hadn't even realised that Sally wore glasses, but she'd had a tiny pair of reading glasses fastened around her neck with a long ribbon, and she'd untied it, and handed it to him, telling him that if it didn't work he could always just tie Duo up with it.
And then… as if that wasn't embarrassing enough…when he took the ribbon back to Duo, trying to shove it discreetly into his hand, Duo had complained loudly that he wasn't some damn girl, and that Heero could find somebody else if he wanted to play dollies, thanks very much. But Heero knew that he'd appreciated it anyway, mainly by the fact that Duo hadn't punched him, when Heero had lost his temper and held him down and tied up his annoying hair. Loose hair was a nightmare in low gravity. Kneeling on Duo's chest, Heero had wrapped the black velvet ribbon around Duo's plait half a dozen times, and tied it in half hitches and several, very un-girly reef knots, that had taken Duo half an hour to undo that night.
And after that, Heero had kept an emergency hair band around his wrist, and forgotten all about the ribbon.
Until now.
“You kept it,” said Heero, recognising the truth with a joyful leap of his heart, but wanting Duo to say it out loud anyway. “Because I gave it to you…”
“Yeah.” Duo was still buried in Heero’s chest so that Heero had to strain to hear him. “Pretty dumb huh.”
Duo had kept it all this time. Had used it for his cross. Had worn it close to his heart…
"You love me," said Heero softly, awestruck and hardly able to speak. Hardly able to breathe, or think, except for... "You really do love me."
"Yes!!! Idiot! What did you think?!!!! Geez!!!" Grinning, Duo butted Heero's sturdy chest with his forehead in time with his words. "Heero…idiot…I really…" thump "…really…" thump "…really love you. So what are you going to do…umph!!"
"This," murmured Heero Yuy against his lips, as he rolled him over and stretched out on top of him. Warm, and content, and suddenly blissfully, gloriously happy. "And this…and this…and probably this…"
"Oh." Said Duo Maxwell. "Mmmm. Oooh. Good."
And it was.
Very, very good.
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Authors note.
Inspired by an original story, Dare You by Matthew Haldeman-Time
http://www.matthewhaldemantime.com/1/idareyou.html< br>