Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ True North ❯ True North, Chapter 10 ( Chapter 10 )

True North

Chapter 10

Pairing: 2x1

Category: AU

Warnings: OC kid

Gundam Wing copyright Bandai, Sunrise, and Sotsu Agency. "Eien no Rhapsody" copyright Midori Saiha/Ringo Zaidan. "Flowers in the Window" by Travis, 2001.

The first thing Duo did upon getting out of the car was stretch every muscle in his body. The driver's seat had had a lot of legroom, but it didn't make up for him not moving for a good few hours.

Still, he had to admit, it was a small price to pay for arriving at the small beach he hadn't been to in years. With good timing too; he'd managed to get vacation days just when Moira's spring break was starting.

White Sands wasn't a popular beach in the spring; most people on Earth still wanted to head down to the tropics, where it was sunny and blistering hot. That left White Sands-a little manmade beach a couple hundred miles south of where they were-with a handful of people at most. It gave the area a sleepy feeling, which was what Duo wanted. He didn't /mind/ crowds, did just fine with them, but when he wanted to get away, he wanted to get /away/. Heero disliked crowds outright, and it didn't seem to matter to Moira one way or another-there had been situations where Duo had seen her thoroughly enjoying herself.

"This is it," Duo said, pointing with the keys to the small wooden two-story cabin that they'd parked in front of. "Man, it's been a while since we've been here. How long would you say it was, Moira?"

Moira shrugged, tugging on her wristband. "Last time we were here, I was eight...I think."

Duo whistled, shaking his head. "That's a damn long time." He kicked at the gravel. "But anyway, let's get inside," he said, going to the trunk and popping it open. "I want a nap before dinner."

He heard footsteps pattering on the ground as he pulled out a suitcase.

"Watch the guitar! /Watch the guitar/!" Moira shrieked, and she flung herself at the trunk before Duo was able to put the suitcase down. It landed with a thud, almost pulling Duo down too.

When he could find a solid footing again, he saw Moira leaning against the bumper of the car, heaving a relieved sigh. The guitar had rolled so that she was now supporting it with her back.

"The guitar's not going to break that easily, especially if it's in a case, hon. Keep that in mind the next time you're knocking someone over," Duo said, dusting himself off. "Now, get the damn thing and help us get the rest of the stuff inside of the house." He pointed at Heero, who was making his way to the door with the cooler. "Look, he doesn't have the keys."

With that, he hauled the suitcase towards the cabin with one hand, digging for the keys in his pocket with the other, the sound of Moira cooing to her guitar fading in the background.

******

Moira sucked in a deep breath. "Wow," she said to herself. "We haven't been back in /forever/."

She was standing in the room she'd slept in the last time she and Dad had been here. From what she could tell, it was all the same; the bed was still up against the window, the rug next to it the same shade of pine green dotted with violets, and the mattress still creaked when she bounced up and down on the bed.

A stream of giggles bubbled from Moira as she hopped off the bed and twirled around the room. It was like she was seven years old again, with no school and a beach where she could swim and go canoeing with Dad, run around on the sand, and on the last night, build a fire and then sit and watch the sky for a while after it went out.

It made her happy for some strange reason, to be back here, to feel like she was little again. She'd have to ask Dad if they could do the fire this time; she loved the fire part the best, and this time she'd really be able to get some good pictures.

Granted, they were only here for a few days instead of a week, but they could still do a lot in that amount of time. Moira had it all planned out; she'd checked the weather at White Sands for when she'd go running on the beach with her camera. She'd wade in the lake in the afternoon; that was when the heating lines underwater were at their best, and then go out and play her guitar on the porch after dinner.

Yeah, she felt good. Spring break started this Friday, and since Dina had given them all a day off, there'd only been two classes to worry about before she went home for lunch. After that, they'd piled into the car and driven five hours here. Kinda strange when she thought about it; White Sands was so different from home that when she was here, it was as if home and whatever was in it never existed. That made pretending to be seven years old even better, because when they weren't home, she wasn't reminded of Blair or its assignments. No tangible responsibilities made it easier to /have/ a vacation. And then, Moira thought, well, it wasn't /too/ far off until the end of the year in May.

Moira sat back down on the bed, crossing her legs Indian-style on the mattress and took off her wristband on her right arm. She'd worn it to hide the bandage on the cut she'd gotten in the café before; the bandage was supposed to make scars fade to near-invisibility within two weeks. Today was the tail-end of the second week, but she still had a day or two before she could take it off. It must have sucked not to have these bandages in the past; she couldn't imagine walking around with that scar on her wrist and not getting weird stares, or for the rude ones, questions about why she'd ever want to kill herself despite the protests of "no, it was an /accident/, really."

Dad had told her to say "fuck off" in so many words to the ones who asked. Papa still didn't understand why she was making such a big deal about the scar on her wrist; as far as he was concerned, /he/ could tell that Moira hadn't tried to kill herself just by how crooked the whole thing looked.

Then again, they didn't have to go back in public with their wrist all banged up. If Ethan and Sabrina hadn't backed her up, the professors would have dragged her to Counseling as soon as she walked in the door of their classrooms.

In the end they'd let her wear the bandage because she pointed out that even though they were in the middle of nowhere with White Sands, there were still /some/ people there during its off-season. And they'd probably give her funny looks. The wristband hid the bandage well, and by the time it'd done its work, whatever was left wouldn't even be all that noticeable. She could live with that.

Moira heard someone calling downstairs. She pushed the door open halfway and peeked outside.

"It's time for dinner! Duo wants you to come down and help!"

"Oh! Yeah, coming!" Dad was cooking burgers; she could smell them all the way up here now that the door was open.

Moira dashed downstairs to set the table; she was so hungry that she'd have eaten the patties raw if she could get away with it.

******

"Hey, listen to that," Duo said, sitting up in the bed. Heero wondered how he could still want to do that after all that driving, topped off by sex as soon as both of them headed into their bedroom. He'd been ready to call it a night, roll over and go to sleep when Duo had started talking.

"What?" he yawned.

"It's quiet," Duo said. He sounded awed.

"Duo, that's because it's nighttime and everybody else is sleeping, which is something you should do too." Heero really wanted to move away from Duo right now; it was warmer here at the beach and it wasn't helping him feel any less sweaty or sticky. He'd take a shower, but right now, he was too tired and falling asleep in the tub was a possibility that was all too real at this point.

"It's never this quiet at home, though," Duo mused thoughtfully. "You hear things, like running machinery or the house doing system checks. And here, it's so...nice. There's nothing to listen to." He was staring out the window like a little boy on Christmas Eve.

"What's your point?" A post-sex conversation wasn't what Heero wanted right now; he didn't mind them, normally, but there was a time and a place for that sort of thing, and it wasn't now. The sooner Duo said what he wanted to say, the better.

Duo didn't say anything, only kept staring out the window. At first, Heero thought that was the end of it and rolled onto his side, but then Duo said, "It's amazing how even when you try to go to bed at night someplace else, you're still reminded that it's not home."

Heero snorted. "Of course it's not home. Isn't that why you wanted to come here?" He wiggled, trying to untangle the sheets wound around his body, and got both of his legs free before Duo spoke up again.

"Yeah, I did. Now that we're here, though, I'm reminded of how it's /not/ home. Just because I want to come here doesn't mean I want to stay," Duo said, leaning back from the window. "It's different."

"What if we move?"

"Huh." Duo was quiet. "Well, in the end you get used to wherever you finally wind up, eventually. I never thought I'd get used to Earth after moving from L2, but now I can't think about living anywhere else." He drew up both knees, resting the heels of his hands on them. "I guess coming here reminds me of that again."

"Mmmm." Heero rolled over onto his side, away from Duo.

"I wonder how that happens, how you can move from place to place and still find a home. There's got to be something more to it than only having shelter, you know?" When Heero didn't answer, Duo prodded him with a foot. "Hey, are you listening?"

"Duo, I want to sleep. So should you." Heero scooted to the edge of the bed and shut his eyes.

"Fine, but think about it." He heard Duo slide under the sheets, roll over, and then start snoring within minutes. Of course Duo was tired, but sometimes it wasn't clear to anyone until he was told to rest.

Much as Heero didn't want to admit it, the questions Duo asked about home bothered him. He didn't have the answers, and for some reason, he felt as if he should. Before he followed Duo into sleep, he decided that he'd give the matter some thought and see if he couldn't come up with anything by the time they had to leave.

******

In the morning, Heero wasn't any closer to figuring anything out. He'd woken to find the bed empty, still slightly warm where Duo had been. In fact, the rest of the house was empty; the dining room table had two notes on its surface. The first one read, "Out canoeing. Be back in time for lunch," in Duo's familiar scrawl, and the second had, "Taking pictures outside," followed by an "-M."

So Heero decided to go sit out on the beach with a book he'd borrowed on his last trip to the library. Unfortunately, he only managed to get through the first twenty pages before he realized that he hadn't been paying attention to the story whatsoever. Duo's questions stayed in his mind like a bug bite he couldn't scratch.

He should know; after all, hadn't he moved, if not in space, in time? The same place looked entirely different after six and a half decades had gone by, it was so different from what he was accustomed to. And yet he'd managed to settle in okay. It hadn't been smooth-some things one couldn't really pick up where they'd been left off-but the transition /had/ been made, and Heero was getting used to living in AC 262.

That was probably the simple answer, Heero thought. He could tell Duo that he gradually got used to things, grew familiar with them, so in the end, for him, he just needed time to get used to the new surroundings. But that was an incomplete answer, since he still wasn't too used to where he was, but nevertheless, wasn't too much the worse for wear. Duo's questions usually demanded complete answers. Not that Duo wouldn't be satisfied with answers missing things here and there, but Heero didn't like doing that.

Duo was probably what had helped him the most, simply because he was the only recognizable person Heero saw when he woke up. Having Duo gave the entire place a context he could understand. Still, it couldn't have been all Duo. Otherwise, what would happen if, and when, Duo died before he did? Maybe by then, this time frame wouldn't feel so alien, or there'd be other familiar people, places and things in Duo's place.

He saw a lone figure walking near the water's edge. As it came closer, he recognized Moira's confident swagger, along with the gentle sway of her hair. She had her camera in her hands, stopping every now and then to fiddle with the controls before shooting. Sometimes she crouched down, taking pictures of what looked like the water or some rocks before going on her way. After some time, she caught sight of Heero and ran towards him.

"Hey," she said, "I thought you'd be out with Dad."

"Duo's out canoeing on the lake," Heero replied, shutting his book. "You didn't know?"

A shake of the head. "Nope. He was still asleep when I went out." She crouched down next to Heero, bare toes digging in the sand. "What's that?" she asked, pointing to the book cover. "You reading a novel?"

He nodded. "How early did you get up today?"

"Probably around six or so. You gotta get up early if you want good pictures." Moira pressed a button on her camera and the image on the LCD screen-currently showing a picture of a rock formation near the water-changed into one of a sunrise over the lake. The emphasis was on the sky, as it took up most of the picture, with the water added as an afterthought. The following image was of the water and its reflection of the sky on the surface. Moira then looked up at Heero, cocking an eyebrow as if to say, "see?"

There was that knowing look in her eyes again. It'd appeared every so often since they'd smoothed things over in December, some sort of wisdom that only she possessed. It was as if she couldn't be completely touched or understood. She was in a completely different world from his own, one that Heero would not have much opportunity to enter. It bothered him a bit; that even though he knew so much about science and nature, he'd never have the knowledge that one gained simply by growing up normally.

Well, she was the one in the family that was the most normal. Of course, the whole thing was now far from normal now that Heero was here.

"Moira," he asked, "how do you feel about having me here?"

She glanced up at him, confused. "What?"

"I mean...you don't think it's weird having me here like this?" Heero gestured towards himself.

"Oh, oh," Moira said, immediately understanding. She tilted her head from side to side, thinking.

"You know what?" she finally said, cocking her head in Heero's direction, "yeah, it was, at first. Especially because you weren't /anything/ like what I'd originally thought. I didn't think we'd hit so many snags, and that's probably why it took so long for us to actually coexist without killing each other."

"Is that it?"

She laughed. "Well, that, and at first, I was taller than you. But now, I think it's normal. Nothing /too/ out of the ordinary." She settled further back onto her heels, letting her toes come out of the damp sand.

"Even though we're around the same age?" Heero pointed at himself and then at Moira. He'd found it disconcerting, to say the least; never mind what Duo said about getting to know her as a person, having a daughter the same age he was took a lot of getting used to. Every now and then he'd see Duo in the way Moira walked with a swagger, or how she lifted her chin when she looked over her shoulder. As for himself, there were times where her facial expressions were so similar to his own it felt like peering into a mirror.

Some would say Heero was lucky to see how she finally turned out, but he'd rather have seen her grow into her personality instead. This was jarring.

"You don't act eighteen," Moira said, matter-of-factly. "I should know. Eighteen-year-old guys don't act the way you do; usually they're busy drawing dicks on each other's doors if they're not getting drunk and puking on the stairs. That's the way they are, for the most part." She flipped a hand palm up, as if to say, "nothing to do about it."

"I think you act Dad's age," she continued. "And if you weren't Papa, that'd be really screwed up, but you are, so...yeah. It makes more sense." Moira nodded emphatically. "I like it better this way, you know? So, to answer your original question, it's not so weird at all. Or if it is, I don't really care."

She rose to her feet, brushing off her capris. Heero noticed that she no longer wore the little purple wristband. The scar on her wrist had disappeared, leaving behind a faint line to indicate that she'd ever been cut in the first place. As Moira stretched her arms above her head, Heero once again realized how much he missed her growing up. Sometimes, he envied her; though she wasn't nearly as smart as himself or Duo, she'd had a normal childhood compared to both of them.

She'd probably never wondered about moving away, since she and Duo had stayed in the same house, it was never an issue to her.

"What if we moved?" Heero asked, deliberately not looking into her face. The tops of her feet were pale and bony, with the tendons rippling underneath her skin as she wiggled her toes. Every time he saw Moira, she was always in motion.

"...now, why would we ever do that? There's no reason," Moira said, confused. "Are we going to?"

Heero shook his head. Moira sighed in relief. "Geez, don't scare me like that, okay? I wasn't planning on moving out until I graduated Blair. I think I'd be old enough then."

"That soon?" Heero was incredulous. The idea of her even leaving the house was such a foreign concept; he couldn't imagine her ever wanting to live away from them at this point.

Moira shrugged casually. "I'd be nineteen once I graduate; that's about time to get an apartment nearby and start working, right? Assuming I can get a job and stuff." She looked off into the distance, hands on her hips. "You can't tell how the job market will be in three or four years. That's such a long time away..."

Heero decided she was right about him being mentally older than eighteen; for him, three or four years was nothing after having been asleep for much longer. But for Moira and her classmates, that was an eternity or two; the awe in her voice told Heero that while she could plan for it, it was farther away than the other side of the lake.

"You don't have to leave right away if you don't want to," he blurted out. "There's no hurry." When all Moira did was throw him a confused look, he explained, "You'll still be young when you graduate, so it's not like you should feel obligated to move out."

"I wouldn't be moving far away. Well, not if I could help it. But I'd like a place of my own. That'd be /awesome/," Moira said. "I gotta grow up /sometime/."

"Even if you move farther away, you'd come back home every now and then, right?" The idea of Moira moving away and not returning was an idea he didn't like very much.

Moira stared at him, confused, for a few seconds before her eyes widened in realization. "Yeah, sure. I wouldn't be too far away anyhow; just in an apartment or something. What, you think I wanted to leave you and Dad that much? Jesus." She laughed. "I couldn't do that. My friends jump up and down every time they get to go back home for vacation. Some people say it's for the better food, but I dunno."

"Four years isn't as long as you think," Heero muttered.

Moira nodded. "Maybe not. I just can't see myself that far ahead in time."

******

After dinner the next night, Moira took out her guitar and went on the porch. She'd missed it a lot; since she started classes at Blair, she hadn't had time to play much.

She hoped her skills weren't rusty. Even the guitar pick felt a bit disused in her hand. But a few practice chords told her that there weren't any problems. There was a song that she'd been practicing last time; hopefully, she wouldn't need the tablature, because she hadn't brought them here, and also, except for the lone candle she'd taken out with her, the lighting sucked anyway.

Closing her eyes, Moira began to play. This was a bit hard, since the guitar she had came without strings. Instead, they were replaced by a series of lasers that would make the appropriate sound whenever the pick was strummed across. It was a good idea; the settings could be adjusted for either acoustic or electric sound output, and it saved a lot in case a string broke.

Then again, guitars with strings nowadays were viewed as antiques. They were in museums, most of the time.

The door creaked open. "Hey, you," she heard Dad say. "What're you doing out here?"

"Playin' something." She heard an "ahh" from Dad as he plopped down next to her on the porch.

"No words?" Dad asked. Moira cracked one eye open; he was sitting on the porch, leaning back on his hands. She shook her head.

"That's too bad. I liked that song you used to play all the time last year. What was it called?" Dad hummed a few bars, making her remember how good his voice was. He didn't sing much, but when he did, often Moira thought the world had lost a good singer.

"Oh...that one. `Flowers in the Window.'" Moira strummed the introductory chords, singing, "When I first held you I was cold, a melting snowman I was told...but there was no one else to hold, before I swore that I would be alone forevermore..."

Dad joined in with the chorus, "Oh, wow, look at you now, flowers in the window, it's such a lovely day, and I hope you feel the same...'cause to stand up, out in the crowd, you are one in a million, and I love you so, let's watch the flowers grow..."

This was an easier song; practicing it or listening to the mp3 nonstop had paid off. Of course Dad would have memorized the lyrics; he'd had to put up with Moira singing or humming the tune all the time when she wasn't attached to the guitar. But it was a good song; made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside and damn glad to be alive, so it didn't look like he minded.

"So now we're here and now is fine, so far away from there and there is time time time...to plant new seeds and watch them grow, so there'll be flo-wers in the win-dow when we go..."

When they finished singing, Dad looked back at her fondly. "You're getting good with that guitar, hon."

Moira smiled. "Glad to hear that. When I move out, I want to take it with me."

He laughed out loud. "Oh, geez, that's not going to be for a while. Why are you thinking about that?"

Moira could barely make out the outline of the porch in the candlelight; in fact, she could only see a bit of what Dad was wearing; the plaid of his favorite flannel shirt and some old jeans. A wave of nostalgia overcame her; it felt like this moment was from a long time ago, and the feeling wrapped itself around her like a favorite shirt.

"I dunno," she said, after watching the way the light changed the way Dad's clothes looked for a few seconds. "I just figured that it'd happen eventually, right? I can't live with you guys forever, right? Still," she mused, "Papa really freaked out when I mentioned getting my own place. Even though it's four years away. That's still a long way off, isn't it?"

Dad frowned thoughtfully. "Well...I don't know how to put it, but when you get older, time gets shorter." He drummed his fingers on his knee. "Hmmm. That's what I'd think, at least. After you get to be about my age, four years isn't /that/ long at all. So for both of us-that is, your papa and I-you'll be moving out pretty soon. If anything, Papa's probably freaked because he just got here and you're gonna be on your way out soon."

Idly plucking at her guitar, Moira said, "Huh. Didn't think about it like that. What's he so worried about? Even though I'd go, it's not like I wouldn't come back or anything to visit or hang out, right?"

"Why's that? I thought for the first month you'd be so thrilled to be in your own place that you'd have to be pried out," Dad said, grinning. "That was me for a while. Ah, good times."

Moira shrugged. "I'd still be in the same city, I think, so I want to at least come back once a week. That way I can still see you two. Until I get settled in." She idly kicked at the porch steps, listening to her heels thump on the wood.

"Can't stand to leave us for good, can you?" Dad said fondly.

Moira let her heels clomp six more times on the steps before saying, "It's not home without you, and after a while, it probably won't be home without Papa. I guess what I'm trying to say is that home's where you two are, and I'll always need to come back."

She felt Dad's strong hands on her shoulders, massaging them. "You know you'll always be able to come back to us whenever you want, hon. Whenever you want."

They stayed like that, quiet, with Dad kneading her shoulders, until the candle burned low.

******

"Check that out. You're her pillow now," Duo said, poking the fire on the sand with a stick.

Every time he and Moira had gone to White Sands, Duo would make a bonfire on the last night. This time was no exception. It burned brightly, throwing orange-yellow light on all three of them, providing a lot of warmth for the chilly March weather.

"My legs are getting numb," Heero grumbled. Moira was currently sleeping on his lap, her arms draped across his knees. They'd made the fire at ten in the evening, and now it was probably around two in the morning. Duo checked his watch; it read 2:09.

"We've been out here for a while," he said. "You wanna go back in or what? We don't have to leave till lunch or so tomorrow."

Heero shook his head. "That's okay." He paused, staring into the flames. "By the way, I've thought about that question you asked the first night we came here."

"Huh?" Duo looked up from the stick he was using to poke the wood underneath. "Oh, that one. What about it?"

"I couldn't find a straight answer. It bothers me a lot. I should be able to give you one. Even though I didn't move in space, moving in time is the same, so...I don't know." He ran his fingers over Moira's back; she was so sound asleep that she didn't even stir. "I thought about it the entire time we were here, but I'm still at the same place."

Duo laughed. "Man, I can't believe you'd think about something like that all throughout our time here. I'm sorry. I meant for you to keep it in mind, but not like that." He scooted over next to Heero. "It's okay. But now that you mention it, someone here mentioned her plans to move out after graduation." He nodded towards Moira.

"I told her four years wasn't a long time," Heero said softly. "She didn't believe me."

Duo snorted. "Eh. She's young. Even a month seems like forever to people like her. And she said that she'd come back and visit a lot, right? That's what she told me." He buried his hand up to the wrist in the cool sand.

"It won't be the same," Heero said. "I can't imagine the three of us ever being separated."

"Separated /how/? Heero, it's not like you'll never see her again." Duo affectionately rubbed his arm.

Heero said nothing for a while, but instead looked down, stroking the space between Moira's shoulder blades in small circles. Then, he said, "I love both of you so much."

All Duo could think of to say was, "Oh." He felt dumb, possibly insensitive for only being able to say that, but anything more seemed hopelessly inadequate.

An overwhelming feeling of joy came upon him, as he realized just how much of a lucky bastard he was. As far as Duo was concerned, he wanted this night to last forever.