Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Ugly ❯ The pretty boys ( Chapter 1 )

(continues straight from chap.one )

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He wore an almost white looking bluish gray suede jacket, that was currently hanging from his elbows, as he was frantically fishing for something from his inside pocket. There was something glinting in the sunshine, and as Duo squinted his eyes to see, he realised that there was something small hanging from both of his soft earlobes. Looked like platinum rather than silver... A tiny violin and a...Star?

He had earrings.

The knowledge made Duo feel very weird in a very weird sort of way.

” Well”, thought he,” It must be my confusion about how to get the platinum gleam right”.

”When I draw them, that is.”

Yes. That was the reason for his intense stare... As well as envy.

Everyone is entitled for some masochistic fun every once in a while, so what could be more satisfying, than to indulge yourself on how much better other people look and dress and just generally are, than you?

But still... He mainly followed them around, to listen to them talk. He liked them. It could never be, of course, but he desperately wanted to befriend them. Sometimes he would imagine himself with them, as a part of their small group, walking, joking, laughing...

 

The blond boy was now done searching, and was holding a beautifull, lightblue case on his hand.

”Ah-ha!” he laughed, and snapped it open. From the small case emerged a thin, black cigaret.

”Imported stuff.” he said, smiling. ” You want one too, guys?”

There was a hassle and then severe scolding from his two companions.

”Quatre, PUT THOSE AWAY! Where did you get them, anyway?” the shorthaired boy snapped, reaching for the cigaretcase. ”My, my...” the black haired boy said, with a small smirk. ”Our little angel, smoking... Who would have thought... Not such a boyscout anymore?”

The blond boy simply laughed, and started to button up his jacket, which he was once again wearing properly.

”Of course I am! I walk old ladies across the street all the time anyway, don't I at least deserve a cigaretbreak?!”

The blackhaired boy sighed and shook his head, squinting his eyes in the sunshine.

” Not while you're in my karate team, you don't... Your dad's gonna kill you, Winner, you realize that?”

The blond boy gave in easily. In fact, so easily, that he had probably only produced the cigarets to get a rise out of his friends anyway.

”I don't know, if my dad's gonna kill me... Those are my mom's.” He gave a sunshiney smile.

Looking at him, Duo was suddenly overcome with the most curious feeling, a little like shivers down his spine, and a sureness that he could't quite place... He was certain, that he could have been very good friends with the blond in another place... Another universe. Not here, of course.

Not that he expected the boy to ever be impolite and rude like the people in his own school, but rather distant, smiling... Pitying. Kind and pitying.

There was a rather sizeable lump forming in his throat.

As he was stearing at the shining head in longing, his attention was suddenly caught by another blond head, platinum, this time, long white shining strands waveing in the wind, heading for the small record store.

He forgot the three boys he was supposed to be following and eavesdropping on, and sprinted after the familiar form yelling ”Zechs! Zeeechs!! Wait!”

As he run past the boys (one twitched, one jumped, and one blinked) he unwittingly drew attetion to himself. Had he thought about it, he would not have done it, but he was so used to being ignored and yelled at, that he didn't think, didn't care.

 

He had the habit of wearing his hair in a braid, to avoid tangles, and that braid was now flapping against his back, as he run. The three were staring after him.

” I was startled.” the blond one said, quite unnecessarily, since had been the one who jumped.

”Yeah. A busy fellow. With rather nice whip of hair.” the chinese one said appreciateively.

” Yes. Lovely.”

The two turned to look at their companion. For a moment they just stared at him, and then the bluegreen eyes started to sparkle. ” You didn't just say..?”

”OOOH.” the blackhaired one said, bulging his eyes theatrically and lifting his hand to rest on his chest. ”Oh, so very LOVELY.”

”Oh, for heaven's sake!” the third one barked, snapping out of it. His two friends were now laughing and poking him, and he knew that he would't hear the end of it.

”It was a nice hair. You said so, Wufei!” But even as he tried talking back to his friends, he knew he was doomed, and it was best just to resign.

”Yeah... But I didn't say it was LOOOVELYYY... Oh, SO LOOVEELYY...”

”Will you just let it go?”

But they didn't, and the shorthaired one didn't really expect them to. They just kept on walking, their laughter ringing in the air.

 

Duo reached Zechs, who had stopped and turned to wait for him. They smiled as they greated eachother. ”Hey! Where you goin'?” Duo asked, though he knew already.

”Just to get the latest of 'Twisted Hell Angel's of the Dark and Gory Recesses of Underworld and Killing All's single. It's a killer. ” Zechs answered, though he knew, that Duo knew.

”And then I was coming over to your place, and I was gonna bring pizza, too... Your lucky day. You get to choose the pizza now. ” And Zechs smiled. He had the warmest, friendliest smile, and it always made Duo forget, that he was but a poor outcast kid, with an appearence disability.

 

Suddenly Zechs saw the three boys approaching, and turned his smile on them. ”Hello, Wufei! Long time no see! Great match the other night. I was with your big bro watching. Boy was he proud of you. Kept telling everyone, that you were related, and that you had inherited your skill from him...” He laughed, loud and friendly. The boy he had called Wufei only smiled, rather tightly, but with a faint blush on his cheekbones. ”I'm adopted.” he said, with an odd sounding voice.

”Yes, Wufei.” said Zechs, kindly. ”I've known you all your life. I know.” Wufei's cheeks darkened significantly.

”And you guys were very good, too... In good shape, even though you ate everything mrs.Khushrenada baked last weekend...You could have left something for Treize and me, too, you know.” he winked, and the boys laughed. Casual. Familiar. Then he said :” Oh, right. This here is my girlfriend's little brother, Duo Maxwell. ” He gestured towards the boys. ”these are my friend's kidbrother, Wufei, and his friends, Quatre and Heero.”

The one called Heero lifted his eyes to Duo, and Duo saw him flinch, as he took in the state of his face.

The world got so very cold. Duo could feel his face closing up and his eyes harden. His dreamworld shattered quietly to pieces, and on top of that these terrible people were taking Zechs. Zechs was HIS! Dammit, Zechs was all he had, he had nothing else! Why did these people had to have everything??

Now that he thought about it, he did remeber Zechs mentioning his friend Treize and these guys, too. But he had never really payed attention.

He lifted his gaze, thinly veiled hatred in his eyes and said: ”Hi.”

”We were going to go and buy some cd's... Duo here has three months to review them, 'till Noin and myself come back.” Zechs put his hand brotherly on Duo's shoulder.

Something was off now. Duo didn't understand what Zechs was talking about. He looked up at him and repeated ”Come back? Where... Where are you going?” He felt stunned beyond words.

”Didn't I tell you? It's GREAT! Noin, me and Treize are going with Treizes girlfriend to her parent's summer house. We'we all got jobs from Mr Po's company, and though they don't last but three months, they pay quite well, and it's a great opportunity for us all. Looks good on the cv, you know.” Duo was staring up at Zechs in shock, horror written all across his face. He didn't notice, that there was another person sharing this exact expression standing there.

His eyes were bulging out.

Three monts without Zechs? No. NO! Three months completely alone in the great, vast universe. His pain and panic were real and stinging.

”Don't worry, Duo... I'll bring you souveniers...And I'll have so much to tell you then, when I come back, that you won't surely be bored with the same ol' babble anymore...”

He laughed, cheerfully. There was an emphatical smile on his face, now.

”I'm never bored with you.” Duo said, mechanically. His mouth was moving, but nothing happened in his brain.

”Isn't Sally in your school, Duo? She's a year older, since she had that exchance year abroad... Kinda funny to have your best friend date someone about the age of your young brother-to-be, eh..? But I guess love doesn't look at the age, now does it..? ”

Now Duo's ears were ringing, too. He was certain, that someone had just banged him on the head. Hard. There was probably drool dripping from the corner of his mouth, too, since he had forgotten to swallow.

He shook Zechs' hand from his shoulder, and took a couple of wobbly steps away from him. Right then, the 'cool-gang' from his school chose to make an appearance. Though he was still standing close to the other four, he wasn't quite standing with them. If he had, the cool-gang would have been stunned to silence. But as it was, he was just far enough apart, that they never could think he was talking with these socially accepted and respected people.

”Oh, if it isn't duo.” One of the girlfriends of the popular guys said, tauntingly. Her guy continued: ”What's the matter duo, forgot your flannel undies in the locker after jerking off? We could hear you moan Mr. Quinze's name. Ooh, Yeeaah, harder, mr Quinze, harder in the ASS!” They laughed.

They had stopped while the previous guy was talking, and as they begun to walk again, one other boy yelled over his shoulder: ” By the way, go wash your face, Maxwell, you're DISGUSTING. ”

And off they went.

For a moment there was a stunned silence, and then Duo heard someone take a deep, trembling breath. To his surprise he realized, that it had come from him, and then he was crying.

He just burst into tears, and there was nothing he could do.

 

He heard Zechs say :”Duo.” and then he turned around, and ran.

 

There was shouting and even some running footsteps after him, but he could't, he would't care. He had been humiliated in front of Zechs, and those three guys. To make the matters worse, he had kinda crowned the occasion himself by bursting into tears like a four-year-old. Sally was dating a man , had been probably for some time now, and Zechs was going away, and he had NO clue about anything, and life was just terrible.

 

Then he realized, that he had been running to the wrong direction, and was going back to school instead of home, and he took an agry right turn to a small alley, run a little more, and found himself in a dead end, staring at big, square trashcontainers.

He was very out of breath, and unhappy, so he did the only thing he could do- pullled out his cigarets and lit one.

”Well”, thought he, ”At least I found a decent place to smoke in. No teachers or parents here.”

 

He knew it wasn't good for him, heck, he could feel it in his lungs, but this way he at least got some pleasure out of it.

 

His mother smoked, and when Duo was a little boy, she smoked a lot. She smoked indoors, trying to stand by the window, but there was a veil of smoke still everywhere. She hadn't done it on purpose. She just didn't know any better. Noin was never home to complain, and Duo could't imagine any other way of living.

He remembered always having a runny nose, an eternal flue, and his mother taking him to doctors, begging for them to find out what was wrong with her child.

He remebered having occasional pains in his heart, that he never told a soul about, and being always left behind by other kids.

Whatever they did, played tag, cyckled or just run around, he could never keep up with them, being short of breath and wondering why that was. His muscles didn't protest. Just his lungs.

 

Then they had moved. He'd gotten his own, smoke free space. What was the first thing he did? Started smoking himself.

 

He had no other way to vent, and cigarets gave him a purpose. It was stupid, but the purpose of the life of Duo Maxwell was smoking.

 

He had thought about killing himself, when he was twelwe. He climbed up on the roof of the house their flat was in, with all intentions of jumping., but looking down, his heart began to hammer in his chest like never before, his soul was screaming for mother, and he turned and fled, running like mad to their apartment door, shaken to the very core of his being, and as he tiptoed to his bed, he knew that death would't be an option for him. He tried to feel like he used to, but inside himself he just knew. He could't kill himself. He was a coward. Or maybe some parts of his body were more attached to life than his mind was...

 

Duo took a deep drag trying to calm himself. This was all he had, and all he did, really. So, who cared?

He hated drugs, the thought of them making him angry, and he had some pretty unpleasant memories of a too often drunk mother, who reverted right into someone five years old, when drunk enough, and so he had no great love for alcohol either.

 

His mom wasn't often drunk anymore, and he had his door he could close, but though things at home got better, things at school got worse.

 

Now he sighed and sat down, on the cold ground, deciding to stay here forever.

 

After sitting for ten minutes his buttocks had frozen over, and he realized he was terribly, horribly hungry.

 

”Well...” he muttered to no one, ”Maybe Zechs went to our house... He did promise pizza...” Duo scarambled up and started treking home.

He had to walk slowly, because he just could't get enough breath for a brisk walk, no matter how cold he was. The adrenaline rush that had given him wings was gone, and he shook his head. ”Eh..I'm so stupid....” He contemplated on throwing his cigarets to garbage, but then decided against it.

Last time he had done that he had been regretting it for three days afterwards.

These sudden health-attacks were never very lasting.

He scratched the uneven surface of his throughly pimpled cheek, located a zit with a white head, popped it and then produced a tissue from his pocket and wiped his fingers and cheek.

'Disgusting', he thought, and the sadness rose from deep within his chest.

He kept walking.

 

At home, a delicious aroma was floating around, almost like it had a form, the thin fingers of a siren, beconing to him, luring him... Ah, food! Delicious, warm, exiting... Cozy, fulfilling... He would've eaten, if he wasn't hungry, but he was. He hadn't eaten anything since that morning, and he was starving. Not even the cigarets could keep the hunger at bay. Must've been all that running.

 

He never ate at the cafeteria. He wasn't quite sure, where the freak table was, and to be quite honest, he wasn't even sure, if he would even be welcome there...

He had tried eating at the cafeteria, but a severe wash of panic from all of those hostile people eating around him had rendered him unable to swallow. His hands were unsteady, and all his muscles tensed up. He could hardly lift a fork, and in the end he just dumped his lunch into garbage and left, never to return.

 

The toilet was another place he avoided. If you didn't get beat up there, you still had to be in the same, very small space with people who were just waiting to make degrading commets about you, and make sure you left with an understanding, that you were seriously gonna get yours the next time around. Yes. He was unwanted even in the wc.

 

He had developed an impressive urinary continence.

 

So, coming home, he would rush to the toilet, and after that to the fridge.He had bags of potatochips around, because sometimes just a bite of food suddenly made his hunger explode to such measures, that he could't even wait 'till a sandwich was done. He ate and he ate, like he was never going to see food again. Then mom would come home from work, and make dinner. Duo ate with her, enjoying the silence.

Then he usually went to his room, opened the window really wide, and smoked a couple of cigarettes, leaning out of it in the most dangerous manner.

 

Today though, Zechs was there, so they'd have pizza in his room and mom would make tea and sanwiches for herself.

 

Duo felt a tad embarrasd as he undressed. He kept staring at Zechs' shoes, wishing they could give him a clue about how to make an entrance.

Finally he just walked down the narrow dark corridor, which had a white rag-rug on the floor (a good one, mom. Who's gonna keep it clean?) and stood on the entrance to their livingroom, very quiet. Zechs was sitting on the sofa, talking with Une.

Une had her hair up in a french twist, and she was wearing a darkblue jacket suit.

”Mom! How come you're home already??”

Une looked at her son. ”Well, it's nice to see you too, honey. I'm actually just dropping by... I'm going back to the office.I have some extra work to do, but luckily... I get paid for it too.” Une looked at Zechs, and both laughed, in a very adult way.

”Well, I'm just on my way. Zechs here promised to feed you, so I don't have to worry about that...” she got up.

”Oh, yes. We'll be good, mrs Maxwell. You're just lucky you didn't have a house full of boys for the evening...”

There was a silence. Duo never had guests. Duo looked up. Une looked up. ”what do you mean, Zechs?” she asked.

”well... Just a couple of guys... Wanted to come over... Figured Duo would't apreciate that much, and...So...”

There was a silence. Une Maxwell took off her round reading glasses and her voice was filled with exitement, as she turned to Duo and said: ”You could have had some friends over honey... It would have been fine... You could even have a sleepover with them if you wanted...” Then, turning to Zechs, her voice softening to this impossibly sweet almost whisper, she continued ” Any friend of Duo's is always welcome, you should know that, Zechs... Maybe we could arrange a small party...”

Duo was staring at his mother in pity and amazement. NOBODY could be that clueless. Nobody. Not even him.

His mom was just not... In this same reality with the rest of them...

”Mom. Calm down. No parties.” he said, voice firm.

Une turned to him. ”But honey, it would be so much fun-”

”No.” he interrupted. ”No.Parties.”

”But Duo! Why do you always have to be so difficult? This would be a great opportunity for you to get to know to people, you are so withdrawn, no wonder you never get to know to anybody, you don't even try...”

”Mom.” said Duo, voice filled with warning.

”Honey, it pains me to see you alone all the time, it's time for you to do something about it...”

 

'I've got a mom out of the Twilightzone.' Thought Duo.

 

”MOM! SHUT UP!”

 

”OH, DUO, HERE WE GO AGAIN; WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BLOW UP AT ME LIKE THIS, IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO HAVE A REASONABLE CONVERSATION WITH YOU...”

 

Things would have gotten really ugly really fast, if it wasn't for Zechs. He threw his silvery hair over his shoulder in a brisk manner and butted in on the coversation, as if no voices had been raised.

”Yes, well, Duo and I will have nice, if not a quiet evening listening to records, and eating pizza. Noin is out wth her friends tonight, so that is covered too... We'll have a good time, don't worry. I can stay over, I'll sleep on the couch...”

 

Une looked hesitant for a moment, and then she said: ”Alright, then... But don't be silly, Zechs. No couches for you. Just go and sleep in Noin's room... I have tea ready on the stove, and there's money in the cookie jar..” And as she spoke, she hugged Duo and kissed him, already busy with work thoughts. ”I love you sweetheart.” she stopped to look Duo in the eyes. ”You know that? Don't you?” Duo nodded, grumpily. ”Well, I must run... Have fun boys..” And she was putting on her shoes, and then she was gone.

Tbc