Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Vulnerable ❯ Vulnerable ( Chapter 1 )

Vulnerable

Pairing: 2x1

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing!

Type: One-shot

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I come back from fighting a battle I have been fighting since I was born. Never have I questioned when I was born or if the birth date on my record was real or not. J taught me what I needed to know and Odin had taught me how to survive and how to think when I was younger. Still, sometimes I wish I knew who I was and where I belong. Who am I really? Why do I exist? I know those questions can never be answered by anyone other than me. The answers are something I need to find in time. There are no quick answers for them.

I slip off my shoes and remove my sweat soaked clothes, running from the Alliance and Oz always gives me a workout, one that I shouldn't have to need. Standing there naked and bare, it seems right somehow that I stand here like this, like I'm truly exposed and not putting up a front that everyone sees. Everything I have had done to me to make me survive this war.

I feel so vulnerable, so tired and I wait for Death to take me one day, but it won't. Death doesn't come to me, I bring death upon everyone. Hundreds, thousands of people's deaths are on my hands. My hands are covered with their blood. It can't be seen but I know it's there. I have taken lives since I was a child, only because someone told me to and I continue to do it now.

I cross the room and stare at the lump in the bed. A rhythmic breath comes from those soft pinks lips and is brought about by a steadily rising and falling chest. A serene look on his face is a comfort for me and I know he has allowed me to see him as he is, just as much as he sees me. Maybe I should just sleep alone, I don't want to wake him, but my body craves his touch so much that it's hard for me to move away. Maybe I should…

"Heero?" He calls to me and I know I won't walk away. "What are you doing?" He asks me sleepily and I can't help the small smile that turns up the corners of my lips.

"Nothing, I'm no going anywhere." I grunt in reply.

"Then come here." He pulls back the covers and moves over closer to the wall. He extends his hand to me and I take it in mine, his touch warming me already. I allow him to pull me into the bed and guide my body underneath the warm soft sheets. Duo's own naked body is revealed to me waiting for my skin to greet it and I know I am meant to be here.

He wraps his arms around me, clutching me to him and I can't help myself from being drawn to him. He is so animated, so alive, and emotionally inviting, I cannot be like that. Duo is like the side of me that I could never bring out and I think I'm the side of him he represses. We are a pair, the two of us are pieces of the other and I can't give him up now that I've found him.

He sees me as I am, and I see that he shows me what he truly is. He pulls me close and I lay me head in the crook of his neck, breathing in his intoxicating scent. He smells of lavender and musk but underneath the smells of his bath soap he smells like himself and that is the scent I like best of all. I swear that the scent and warmth of Duo were the best things that I had ever had the pleasure to get to know. I burrow into his neck even more and embrace him tightly.

"Bad?" He asks and I simply nod and snuggle into him as close as I can, resting half my body on top of him. "Can I make it go away?" I nod again and he flips us over so he is on top of me. He brings his body down so he is touching all of me and yet allowing me to breathe and rest comfortably without him crushing me. I wrap my arms around his waist so I have him to anchor me as he begins to roll his hips against mine. My manhood hardens even more with every thrust of his hips he makes and I begin to drown in the rhythm he creates.

His lips find mine and he begins to nibble my lower lip to bring me into our play. I only feel whole when he fills me. He connects himself to me physically and I need it to remind myself that I'm alive. Our coupling is always gentle and Duo is always careful with me, preparing me with extreme care as if I would break if he doesn't. He makes me feel like I'm worth something, even if he is the only one who values me for who I am. He loves me eternally, he told me so and I believe him with all my heart. He pulls out of me and flips us over once again so I am on top of him again and we wait until our breath calms down once more.

"You lost yourself again, didn't you?" He asks me like he does when I come to him like this.

"I've always been lost Duo, but you're the one who brings me home. You're the only one who cares. I love you, Duo for making me feel whole even if it is only briefly."

"I know, but you don't have to give in to the darkness, Hee-chan. I will always be here to light your path when your light goes out and you become lost. I love you too. Now sleep, I'll be right here when you wake up." He kissed my forehead and I lay down upon his warm chest as he pulled the blankets over the both of us.

Duo is right. I know he will always be there for me and he will help me find myself until I can allow myself to permanently come out of the darkness that has enveloped my life. He will be my light and the warmth I need to find my place in this world.

Owari

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