Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Wherever You Will Go ❯ Regrets and Reprimands ( Chapter 2 )

//"…I hate you!…"//

The door had slammed, and Heero had watched from his post against the wall with mixed chagrin and sadness as the American pilot fled in anger, and most definitely in hate. He was angered then, but ashamed. And even now, not three minutes later he felt the constant reverberating of Duo's words in his head. Over and over they repeated, like a tedious and saddening mantra, unrelenting. Over and over and...hate? It couldn't be…could it? Dislike? Maybe. Frustrated? Surely. But…hate? What had he done to deserve his hate; his loathing, when all he truly wanted was his love? Could he have possibly have driven his friend…wait, that wasn't right anymore…his ex-friend so mad with anger, with complete and indistinguishable disgust from his nonchalance and lack of caring? Was he truly that bad?

Too many questions, thought Heero numbly. Too many questions with answers that I have no care to know. You stupid idiot Heero! You baka…you fool, look what you've done! You've thrown away the only friend you had, and for what? For…

"For nothing." Heero took his eyes off the simple, closed door and leant his head back against the cold wall, closing his eyes so as to make certain that should any tears prick at his now sensitive eyes, no one would see them. So he wouldn't feel them trickle down his usually emotionless face, and remind him yet again of another failure. "I hate you?" Deadened, he tried the words on his lips, their strange and untrue essence rolling off his tongue thickly, as if his mind was attempting to stop him from saying it, to stop him from so much as thinking it.

Suddenly, from in the near distance and shelter among the fading sight of the tree cover, the roar of engines could be heard, and upon this somehow grateful disturbance to his thoughts, Heero found himself rolling his head to the side, and cracking his eyes open; just a little. He watched placidly, mind off the topic for a brief moment as Duo and his Gundam flew out of sight; over the faded horizon and hopefully, definitely not out of his life.

Strangely drained, and apparently numbed, Heero walked slowly, with fading, dragging steps across the sparsely furnished room, and to the small couch but four metres away…three…two…one. And with a last effort borne of anger at both himself and some at his friend, the Japanese pilot threw himself down on the dusty red couch, leaning to the side; head resting laxly on strong arms. His last train of thought before his mind blacked out causing him to simply wonder what, and why he seemed to drive people away. It had always been that way, he supposed, just as Duo claimed that anyone he got close to; anyone he loved died. But…was he…how could he…that wasn't true…?

//"…I hate you…"// It was.

"No…Duo…why…why?" And upon thinking these inquiring thoughts, Heero Yuy, the perfect soldier, fell asleep; in tears; alone…lost.

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Authors Notes: Okay, here's another part, albeit a small one. Don't be put off by the short chapters, they will get longer soon…I just don't want to overload my mind with this AND schoolwork AND exams…which I have tomorrow. Heero probably isn't in character…but hey…sorry! Anyway, please read and review, and tell me how I'm going…Thanks a lot…promising more action in the next two chapters!

Love Skaara!

PS: to my reviewers…thanks for the wonderful reviews, its good to see I'm pleasing some people! Cheers!