Harry Potter - Series Fan Fiction ❯ Hermione in Wonderland Revisited ❯ A Few Choice Bumps ( Chapter 2 )

Hermione in Wonderland: Revisited

 

 

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters

 

 

A Few Choice Bumps

 

 

Hermione had half expected that going down the hole was going to be a breeze, sort of like the cartoon she remembered as a child, kind of falling softly while odds and ends floated around her. Luck, however, was not on her side. The fall down the hole was rather disgusting. It was muddy and slimy and smelled like rabbits had used it for a bathroom.

 

 

'This is not,' she thought to herself, 'going to be the romantic adventure I deserve.' Hermione came to the conclusion that she was having a lucid dream. Nothing else could explain the mini-Draco she was following. Well, nothing except a potion experiment gone horribly awry. That was always a possibility, and strangely a more satisfying thought than her dream theory.

 

 

“It most certainly doesn't feel like a dream,” she muttered as her bottom hit a rather large, pointy rock. The slide down the hole seemed to last forever, and Hermione's backside was starting to go numb when she abruptly tumbled out of the hole and landed on something soft and squirmy.

 

 

“Get off me, you filthy Mudblood!”

 

 

Hermione shot up and away from the soft, moving thing. Darn, she'd landed on mini-Draco, ruining her element of surprise. No, wait.... Draco wasn't so mini anymore. Now he was more like life-sized Draco. While he was still wearing his dark hooded cape, he seemed to have lost the Death Eater's mask and was now watching her with his sharp, silver eyes.

 

 

“I don't understand, you were little, and now you're big...” Hermione trailed off as Draco started walking towards her, never removing his eyes from her face.

 

 

“I have no idea what you are talking about, girl. I have always been this size, whereas you seem to have shrunk since I passed you in the field. Who are you and why are you following me? If you've come from the Duchess it's no use; the order comes from the Great Lord and I can do nothing about it.”

 

 

“Who am I?” Hermione couldn't understand why he didn't recognize her. “Wait, don't tell me...” She started examining her body. “Not only did I shrink, I've changed appearance as well.”

 

 

“Well, if you have, I'm sorry for you. No one should have to deal with hair that frizzled. They make potions for that, you know.”

 

 

Hermione glanced back from the puddle she had been using as a mirror. “I think you've gone completely off your rocker, Draco Malfoy. I look exactly as I did when I left my room this morning. True, I'm a bit dirty, and my uniform is a bit worse for wear, but nothing to make me unrecognizable.”

 

 

“Draco Malfoy? Who do you think I am, girl? Some boy you pine over in your adolescent girl way?”

 

 

Hermione was a bit thrown off by this strange Draco's way of phrasing things, however she really wanted to figure out what exactly was going on. “Well, if you're not Draco Malfoy, who are you?” she questioned. “Because you certainly look like him.”

 

 

“My name is none of your concern. And while I could certainly understand why you would pine for this Draco Malfoy, if he does indeed look like me, as I am the most dashing figure I know of, I don't know what he would see in someone quite as plain and stupid as you.”

 

 

“Why you little slimeball, not only do you look like Malfoy, you sound like him as well.” Hermione stopped her tirade as a thought occurred to her. “If you aren't Malfoy, why did you call me Mudblood?”

 

“Why indeed,” Draco sneered, “Well, you are, aren't you? Are you not from above? Made from earth and all that stuff? From mud you were raised and from mud you will return if you do not remove your body from my presence this instant.” Draco glanced at his watch in horror, “Oh my, I'm late; the Great Lord will have my head.” Off he hopped without giving Hermione a second glance.

 

 

Having no other choice, Hermione set off to follow Draco in the hopes that he could at least point the way up.