I My Me!(Ai Mai Mi!) Strawberry Eggs Fan Fiction ❯ Scrambled Eggs ❯ Chapter One ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: Juu-"Yes! We've finally done it KrazyCarla!! We've stolen the rights to I My Me Strawberry Eggs!"

KrazyCarla- * Breaks out in song and dance while drinking tons of sake* "Fukae! Fukae! You're finally mine!!"

* The door is busted down and dozens of police men and lawyers swarm around the dancing two*

Police men- " You are both under arrest for the kidnapping of the rights to I My Me! Strawberry Eggs." * arrest a struggling Juu and KrazyCarla*

KrazyCarla- * slightly drunk * "Kidnapped?! We didn't kidnap it! We stole it!" * proud of self*

Juu- * rolls eyes * "Thanks a lot KrazyC."

Lawyer- "I think you ought to know you can expect to be sued too."

Juu- "Wait! Wait! I My Me! Strawberry Eggs do not belong to us. They belong to some lucky guy or girl who is very rich.

* Police stuff a protesting and cursing Juu and KrazyCarla into the car* "Yeah, yeah. Tell that to the judge."

* Habiki-sensei walks into the room after both KrazyCarla and Juu are carted off * *sweat drop * "Um…don't mind them…I'm sure after an hour or two they'll find a way to bust out of the police station and continue to terrorize you readers. In the mean time read and enjoy the fic and if you liked it please review us with some constructive criticism."

PS: Sorry for the Mary-sues to all the Mary-sue hatters out there. Even though you might not like Mary-sue fics could you at least give this one a try? It's gonna be my first fic that my friend and I might ACTUALLY complete. And if you find yourself liking it-if only a little bit! -then please review. * whispers * Plus it was all KrazyCarla's idea to put the mary-sues in. If you want to blame someone in the reviews blame her.

"I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed."--- Marvin, the paranoid android, from The Hitchhiker's Trilogy

Scrambled Eggs

"WAAAAH!!" Habiki-sensei wailed as `she' ran from a drooling and raving Aoki. `She' dashed quickly behind a sakura tree that was just beginning to bloom.

"Habiki-chaaan!" yelled Aoki as he came stumbling into the clearing panting and grinning stupidly. "Habiki-chan! Please accept these flowers as an appreciation of my love!"

~Please let him pass, please let him pass~ `she' chanted desperately in her thoughts. Aoki, not seeing his lovely Habiki-chan, left the clearing.

"Whew!" Habiki-sensei sighed in relief swiping `her' hand across `her' forehead.

"Um…hello?" a voice called out hesitantly.

Habiki turned around and jumped back in surprise. The girl that had called out raised an eyebrow incredulously. She was crouched down behind a bush and was nibbling idly on what appeared to be…pocky?

Habiki-sensei sweat dropped.

"Um…what are you doing behind that bush and how on earth did you get pocky out in the middle of the forest??"

The girl shrugged and continued eating her strawberry pocky contentedly.

"I dunno * munch munch* last thing I remember * gulp* was being at a party my cousin Clover dragged me to. * nibble nibble * Which I thought was horrible, by the way, `cause they only played rap music. Though knowing Clov she was right at home."

Habiki-sensei blinked "Party? Rap music?? Where is this Clover?" The girl shrugged.

"Probably still chasing the squirrel that stole her beer, oh and my names Maxine just don't call me that, only Max, and yea these highlights are natural." For the first time Habiki-sensei had a chance to get a good look at Max. She was a good 5'6 with waist length black, shiny hair with red, "natural!" highlights, and big, baby blue eyes.

"Son-of- a- bitch!" * Crash! * A second angry voice yelled out as the person crashed into a nearby bush where a smirking squirrel, struggling to hold up a bottle of beer, had just been. A girl of about 17 with lime green hair and crimson eyes was busy spitting out leaves and dirt, while cussing out the supposedly smirking squirrel.

"Ooohhhh…when I find you fucking squirrel your little fuzzy cousins will be seeing me donning a new stuffed squirrel hat wondering where the hell you are!! And that's for only taking my damn beer!" Max rolled her eyes. "Oh please Clov, you and I both know you've got a big ice case full a beer with you always, though I don't know where the hell you could hide it." Clover turned and glared at Max. "Oh, shut up."

"Ahem."

Both turned toward Habiki-sensei and blinked. ~Whoa, she is one hot mamma! ~ Clover thought as she leered at Habiki-sensei, who blushed. ~ Why is she looking at me like that? ~ Habiki thought, blushing slightly. ~ Doesn't she know I'm a woman!…Half the time! ~

Clover slowly moved towards Habiki with a purpose in her steps and a swing in her hips. Max sighed and raised her eyes to the heavens as if asking the universal question `why me?' ~ There she goes again. Poor woman, she'll be traumatized. ~

"Heeelllooo," Clover fairly purred. "What's a lovely girl like you doin' in a place like this? By the way you can call me Clover, Clov, lover, it doesn't matter."

"Gah!"

"Clover! Leave the poor woman alone." Clover's face fell as she pouted at Max. "Just one glomp ok? " Before Max could answer or Habiki-sensei could say no, Clover latched onto Habiki with all her might, squeezing. Clover smiled and snaked one hand up to give one of `her' boobs a loving squeeze.

"Eh?" She slowly squeezed again and got a perplexed look on her face. "This…this boob feels like…cotton!! And believe me I know what a boob feels like seeing as how I've got lots of experience in that department." She stepped back a little and looked suspiciously into Habiki's eyes.

"Now I'm only gonna ask this once," she paused and took on the air of someone who had a life changing question to ask. "Are you a man or a woman?"

Max pulled herself up off the ground after having a very abrupt, and surprisingly nice, meeting with the ground. "What kind of question is that shit-head?!! Of course she's a woman, look at her!"

"Actually Max-san…." Hibiki-kun hung `his' head in embarrassment. "I am a man." He tensed, waiting for them to call him a freak or a pervert. Clover thought about for, oh two seconds, then shrugged. "Eh, I'm Bi, so who cares?" She smirked and licked her lips. "Besides if you look half as good in a pair of pants as you do in a skirt then I say lucky me."

Max picked her jaw up off the forest floor, idly spitting out bugs that had managed to crawl in, and shook her head in stunned amusement. "Damn. Who would have thought the "she" would turn out to be a "he"! Drag Queens these days, you can never tell them apart from regular weird people." Hibiki-kun struggled to pry Clover, who was begging for a kiss, off of him. "So…um girls-stop that!- since you don't know where you are where are you gonna stay?"

Clover paused and considered that. "I don't know. Where are we by the way?" "Japan." Max and Clover turned wide eyes to each other "Japan?!" "Um…Max? One of your many friends wouldn't happen to live around here would they?" Max snorted. "Please Clov, I may know lots of people, but not that many. I mean come on, Japan? What do you take me for? Some socializing floozy??"

"Yes." Clover deadpanned.

"You both can stay at the girls dorm at the Junior High I teach at.(A/N: can someone please tell me what the schools name is, I've forgotten it.) I just realized that I haven't introduced myself properly. My name is Hibiki Amawa or Amawa Hibiki if you're American. You can all me Amawa, but during school hours call me Hibiki-sensei." "Hai, Amawa-kun." Clover smiled. "Why don't we head back to the school and I'll introduce both of you to the students when school starts at 7:30. Oh, I forgot to ask if you both would please keep the fact that I'm really a man secret. I really need this job and I want to prove to the Principal and Vice-principal that men can love just as good as women can!"

*Sniff…sob *

"Eh?" He looked at Clover in confusion. "Such a moving speech!" Clover declared as she looked up at Amawa with huge, magenta eyes brimming with tears. "Right Max?….Max??!" Max snapped her head up from where she was munching on another pocky, looking unimpressed. "Huh? Oh…yea men can love too." She went back to eating her pocky, whispering sweet nothings to it in between bites. Amawa-kun looked at Max strangely and slowly backed away from her.

"Let's just go back now." "Hey, just what "were" you doing in the forest anyway." Clover asked curious. "Oh, well one of my over zealous students Aoki, you'll meet him later today, chased me all the way here to, according to him, prove his love for me." Max looked up again. "Hmmm….psycho. That's my kinda guy." Hibiki-sensei looked at `her' watch. "Hm, it's 7:15…7:15?!?!?! Man, we gotta hurry girls! School starts in 15 minutes!"

They all took of running towards the junior high, well Hibiki-sensei and Max running with Max following Hibiki-sensei. Clover just held on for dear life on Amawa-kun's arm, feet flying through the air as Hibiki-kun and Max raced towards the school.

A/N: Well there's the first chapter. Hoped you liked it. I might have the second chapter up pretty soon seeing as how it's already written down. Depends on if I feel like typing it up and reviews of course. Healthy criticism is welcomed also.