InuYasha Fan Fiction / Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Mending a broken heart ❯ Leaving ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Mending a broken heart

Summary: Youko makes a mistake, but he has five hundred years to think it over.

Flashback

"Dialogue"

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of Inuyasha or Yu Yu Hakusho. Also, this chapter was based off of a chapter in Stephenie Meyer's novel, New Moon.

-------------------------------------------------------

A sad smile.

A very sad smile indeed.

Her heart had been broken once, but now it was completely shattered. She was unsure if she would ever be able to piece together the fragments as she had the Shikon no Tama; However, she was also unsure if she wanted to attempt such a feat.

Inuyasha's betrayal had been hard enough on her young naive heart, but Youko's was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Another sob was ripped from her chest as she slumped over the well, all of her strength completely drained from her petite form.

She had trusted him with everything she had, and once again the Gods had toyed with her emotions, using her as nothing more than an amusement to pass the time.

Kagome was only acutely aware of the fact that thin rivulets of blood dribbled down the side of the well since the slashes across her wrist, back, and torso remained unhealed.

-------------------------------------------------------

“I've been waiting.” His voice was barely above a soft whisper, but she had heard it loud and clear. Without another word, he thrust her canteen toward her dainty hands.

Kagome would be lying if she said she wasn't a little bit nervous. Youko had been distant and cold lately. However, she knew that he disliked being crowded so she gave him his space.

She smiled and gently grabbed his clawed hand. “I came as soon as I was able.” The journey had been over for less than a month, but Kagome still had priestess duties to tend to.

He merely nodded.

For a while they just stood in companionable silence. The sounds of the forest were dying down and the sky was a vibrant hue of orange fading into a deep purple.

“Kagome,” he turned to her suddenly, taking his hand with him and he took in her still child-like appearance. Kagome was eighteen, but she still held an air of youth about her.

“We're leaving,” his words confused her. “We've heard of several instances that impede on our well-being.”

“Why now? Could we wait-”

“We've been talking about this for a long time, but with recent events have agreed to seek shelter elsewhere.”

Kagome suddenly felt as if she had been punched in the stomach.

“When you say we-”

“Kuronue and I of course.” Her ruby lips form an `o' and she felt her heart breaking at the very thought.

“Then I will go with you.”

“No, that is out of the question.”

Something within her screamed, `Why not!?!'

“You promised. You told me that you would never abandon me like Inuyasha did. You said you would always stay by me-”

“Things have changed.” His interruption caught her unaware and her words died on her lips.

Not quite defeated she whispered, “Youko, you never break your promises.”

“This is a promise I am willing to break.” Ice filled his voice and she shivered as his deep baritone voice slithered into her ears.

“Is this about the ceremony? The mating mark? I know I said we should wait, but I don't care! I don't care as long as I am with you. Can't you see that? I just want us to be together, Youko!”

There was a slightly uncomfortable pause between them as he sighed and prepared for the worst.

“I don't want you to come with me. You're nothing but a burden. You're weak.” His words stung as if a thousand knives had pierced her soft flesh.

“I..,” she stopped to collect her words and gather her thoughts. “You don't want me?” The words were simple enough, and yet she could not comprehend them. Not coming from him, not even when his once warm golden eyes shone with a frostiness she had only seen grace Sesshomaru's irises.

“No, I don't. I relinquish my claim on you. My band of thieves was right to call you nothing but an insignificant human. I need not a woman so unworthy tied to me.”

Death would have been more preferable at the moment. She looked into his steely eyes and could see no remorse. He had meant it. Everything he had told her he meant and it tore down her resolve and her strength, leaving her heart once again vulnerable.

“Oh, I see.” She was surprised by how calm her voice sounded. Maybe it was the numbness that had started to settle, but she was thankful that the ache within her chest had seemed to cease. At least for the moment.

“You're just not good enough for me, Kagome.”

His words hung between them as if to create a rift that would soon be impossible to fill. Her number one insecurity had been thrust out there for him to poke and prod and the pain was unimaginable.

Kagome had always known that somewhere, deep within the recesses of her mind that she was not good enough for him. Youko was perfect. He was everything that any human or demoness could have asked for.

He was perfection embodied.

She could tell he was waiting for a response. Anything to let him know that her slow and unintelligent mind had comprehended his words.

“If this is what you wish.”

He simply nodded with that regal air and then opened his mouth once more.

“I would like to ask one favor.”

“Anything,” Her voice had not yet regained its strength but she tried to muster whatever means she had to keep her resolve.

“Don't do anything reckless,” now his words were commanding. “You do understand don't you?”

Kagome nodded with a strange detachment that was so uncharacteristic, she wondered what she looked like in his eyes. Eyes she knew had always found her flaws even if he never announced them.

He smiled in a gentle sort of way and patted her head as if she were a child. “Don't worry. Your heart will eventually heal. Time heals all things...”

She wanted to scream that time wouldn't heal her wounds. She wanted to slap him on his beautiful face just to make him feel even an inkling of the pain she was experiencing. However, she remained silent because somewhere within the chambers of her shattering heart, she knew he was wrong, and it made her smile.

The Great Youko Kurama was wrong.

“And Kuronue?”

“He's gone.”

“Oh,”

“I stayed behind to tell you goodbye, and he wanted to, but I advised against it.”

“Goodbye, Kagome,” and her heart ached even more at the sound of his voice caressing her ears and lulling her into a false sense of security. When she opened her drooping eyes, he was gone.

Kagome would have followed, but she was unable to deny any of the claims he had made. It was true, she was weak and unworthy. It would have been extremely selfish of her to ask him to stay, especially when his heart was so intent on leaving.

-------------------------------------------------------

“Damn him!” She cursed, letting her fists slam against the old wood of the well with such a force it jarred her whole body; However, the pain was minimal to the sharp pain that stung her heart.

Her sobs renewed ten-fold when a startling thought found its way into her head.

She would never live up to the standards that they wanted.

She was a failure.

-------------------------------------------------------

Kagome stumbled through the forest letting his words replay in her head. She had trusted him, given over her heart to him and yet once again she had it thrown back into her face.

“It's a shame that you're out here all alone.” The voice stopped her dead in her tracks.

“Kagura,” A small flicker of fire returned to her voice as she pivoted to face the wind demoness.

“I am quite surprised to see Youko nowhere in sight. You two were inseparable well before the final battle. Did something happen in paradise?”

The insinuation was like a slap in the face, but how could Kagome refute what she said?

“What is it that you want?”

“Simply put, my dear, I want you dead, and that accursed jewel to be burned with your body.”

Kagome felt as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over her head; However, before she could turn tail and run, Kagura attacked.

“Dance of blades!” Kagome managed to dodge most of the blades but one caught her wrist.

“It seems you're going to have to try harder than that, Kagura.” Kagome spoke to soon because when she turned to Kagura again, several more blades were flying in her direction.

Kagome's legs seemed to work on their own accord. She took off at full speed for the Bone Eater's Well with Kagura nipping at her heels.

“It is futile to run, miko. I will eventually see to it that your body is burned with that jewel around your neck!”

Kagome winced as she felt that blades slice her back and torso, but her pain was forgotten as she saw the well come into view. Without a second thought, Kagome launched herself at the well but fell short.

Kagome could only hold her hand out, in a futile attempt, to block the swirling blades.

A blue burst of raw miko energy surged from her fingertips and Kagura was reduced to dust. After getting over the initial shock, Kagome erected a barrier to keep the youkai at bay as she wept with the knowledge that she was no longer wanted or needed in the Feudal Era.

-------------------------------------------------------

The barrier still pulsed around the clearing, but she knew it would soon give out due to her extreme fatigue.

"I'm so thirsty."

Suddenly, remembering her canteen, she twisted off the cap and downed the contents in a few gulps.

“I shouldn't have done that.” She hissed, feeling her damp cheeks.

Kagome was torn.

She knew that crying was natural, but at the same time, she was also livid at the moisture that leaked from her eyes. Her tears confirmed exactly what Inuyasha and Youko had told her.

She was weak. She was nothing but a weak human being.

Kagome hung her head and cried harder.

“Mama,” she hiccupped violently as she spun to face her son. “Mama, why're you so sad?” The last remaining energy of the barrier dropped as Shippo slowly inched closer to his mother's crumpled form.

She didn't have the heart to break the image Shippo had of Youko. He worshiped the older Spirit Kitsune with his whole heart and soul, and she would definitely not be the one to tarnish Youko's image.

“Oh, Shippo, I'm crying because I have to go back to my time,” she instantly retracted her statement. “No, I needto go back to my time.”

“Mama,” his bottom lip trembled, and his eyes became glassy. “Are you going to leave me?”

“Oh, no sweetie. I could never leave you. I would never dream of it, not in a million years.” Feeling suddenly insecure, Shippo hurried into the safety of her arms.

“Mama, you're bleeding.”

Kagome would have laughed if she had been in better spirits, but as such she merely smiled at his bluntness.

“Yes, Shippo, I am.” His nose scrunched up at the putrid scent, but he remained nestled within the safety of her arms.

“What happened? Why didn't Youko protect you?” She didn't answer for a long time, and after a while he was certain that she hadn't heard his question, but just as he was about to ask again, she spoke.

“I was attacked,” she stopped, searching for the right words. “And I suppose Youko and Kuronue were too far away to come to my rescue.” She sighed as they settled of the lip of the well.

“Well, I'm just going to have to set things straight with them aren't I?” His tiny chest puffed out in masculine pride and she quietly giggled at his cute antics.

She added, “Maybe someday,” as an afterthought.

“Shippo, I need to go back, but if you don't want to come with me, I won't force you.” She waited with bated breath for his response.

Kagome half believed that Shippo would see her faults and flaws just as Inuyasha and Youko had and tell her to leave so fearing his rejection worse than anything else, she started to cry again.

“Mama, please don't cry. My home is wherever you are.”

“Shippo, once I pass through,” she sniffled. “I doubt it will let me back again.”

“It doesn't matter, mama.” He assured her, wiping away a few of her tears.

“Goodbye, Miroku. Goodbye, Sango.” And with that, they dropped into the well letting the blue light transport them to the future.