InuYasha Fan Fiction / Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Tales of the Night ❯ Night LXXX: Unable to Focus ( Chapter 14 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Title: Night LXXX: Unable to Focus
Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of Sengoku Otogizoushi - InuYasha or Yuu Yuu Hakusho. InuYasha belongs to Takahashi Rumiko, Shogakukan, Viz Media, ShoPro Entertainment, and Shounen; while Yuu Yuu Hakusho belongs to Togashi Yoshihiro, Shueisha, Viz Media, and Shounen. No profit or money of any kind is made from this fan-created crossover.
Warning(s): Light swearing; Threats of bodily harm; Failed inneudos


The night seemed to be the only time Hiei had to himself these days. It was both different and strange to have nothing to do but think during the long hours between dusk and dawn after spending so many nights in her presence. While there was about ten hours of darkness, it had never dragged on as long as it did now.

She always filled up the darkness with her light, and the silences with her voice. It had become normal for the nights to pass by like the waving of a hand because she filled up the hours. Even if it was just sitting next to her, feeling her power flare up and slip under the control she was trying to press upon it, he had never been bored. And now, even surrounded by the idiots on his team, he was bored. It had never happened before.

Their antics and stupidity did nothing but wear on his patience. He had become used to her ignorance and her natural clumsiness, and had lost his tolerance for the boisterous enthusiasm of his teammates.

And that was the reason he needed this time away from her. She had made him predictable and soft, and was weaving the same spell over him that she had weaved over the mutt and the wolf. He did not want to fall victim to her charms as so many others did.

However he felt as if it was far too late for him. Even during the matches and with his life and his teammates' lives on the line, she was there. There in his mind, everywhere he looked. Leave it to one little untrained miko to cause so much unbalance in the most balanced.

"Hiei, are you sure you don't want anything to drink?" Kurama asked; his voice pulling him out of his musings and back into their hotel room. Even when he was trying to not think about her, his mind was still focused on her.

Perhaps he should have left with more of a goodbye, and then perhaps the conscience she grew in him would not be annoying him right now.

"If I wanted one of those pathetic human drinks, I would've grabbed one when they arrived," he said.

While his patience was short during the best of times, it was even shorter now. He wanted nothing more than for the tournament they had been forced to go to to be over with. Instead of spending his days and nights stuck on some island between the Ningekai and Makai, he wanted to be in a specific ancient tree, antagonizing a certain miko.

At the very least, he found a sense of acceptance there with her. While he knew he never should have felt anything close to that on holy grounds, he could not help but feel normal. There was something about her shrine and her that took away everything that did not matter. He craved and feared it. Acceptance meant softness, and softness meant an early death in his realm. Her natural acceptance was calming him down to the point of where he could not even enjoy senseless killings. He had spent his entire life killing to survive and out of boredom, and she was threatening to change that. He did not know if he would ever be ready for that.

"Hiei, is there something wrong?"

He had been so wrapped up in his thoughts that he had not noticed Kurama moved to stand near him. That was the reason why he had to stay away from her. He could not afford to become soft. Not now, not ever.

"Even if there was something wrong, it's none of your damn business, fox."

The suspicion growing in their looks told him his testiness was arousing their curiosity. Just as she had done with him.

If he could, he would run through her image and his thoughts with his katana.

"So Hiei." He felt Yuusuke's arm go around his neck as he spoke. "What's on your mind? Got issues involving a certain someone?"

Said apparition's eyebrow was fast developing a dangerous tick. It went unnoticed by the one who would suffer. If he did not know any better, he would have thought that the detective was referring to his miko, but he knew he was referring to Yukina. It just had to be his luck that his unknowing twin sister was at the same tournament of darkness as he.

"If you value your ability to speak, detective," he said, "you'll keep your mouth shut and remove your appendage from my person before I remove it for you."

"What the hell're you talking about, Urameshi? Hamster legs got a girlfriend?"

Great. Just what he needed. The oaf sticking his nose into his business like the fox and detective. The days could not pass quick enough for Hiei.

Opening the window he was sitting next to, he glared at them all. "Keep your ridiculous assumptions to yourself before you wake up less a tongue."

At seeing them back off at his threat, he left via the window. After dealing with them and his thoughts of a certain miko, he needed the cool air that tasted of blood.

It was strange and different, seeing what he was. Leave it to even his dreams to betray him. And now he was watching as she lived out another day in her boring little human life. It had been weeks since he had last tailed her throughout the city during the day as they had been filled with training. Yet it was as he remembered.

There she always was, walking home from school surrounded by her three idiot friends and that other one. Hojo-kun. This had to be his own little slice of hell: watching her interact and laugh with her friends and that idiot male. He could already hear her soft laugh as she playfully swatted his arm and called him by that ridiculous name.

The only pleasure he received was knowing none of them had a special smile like he. Not even her Hojo-kun received a smile meant just for him. Only he received a special smile; one that caused her eyes to crinkle and hid her teeth. One that was small and grateful and show exactly how she felt toward him without intending to. Instead she smiled at them all with her patient bemused smile. That was the only satisfaction he got from the scene.

While this was exactly what he wanted to see, her living her own life, it hurt to watch. It may have been that way months ago, but now... All he wanted was her attention. He did not like the thought of her moving on and forgetting about him. He did not want her to become like the ninety-nine percent majority.

Yet he knew she never would. He knew even before he watched her part ways with her friends and head up the steps to her shrine. Even before he watched her happy façade fade away to be replaced by a quiet sadness. He knew it was his fault for causing that emotion in her, even as he knew what he was seeing was nothing more than a dream fabricated by his guilt and conscience.

He really should have left with more than a goodbye while she slept. Guilt was something he never wanted to feel again. He lived his life with no regrets, no guilt, no looking back. But she was changing that, as she was changing his entire life.

While he could never admit it, it hurt to watch her pause in front of the ancient tree. The hurt in her eyes of midnight blue was there for all the world to see if it dared to look close enough. And he dared. If she would dare to look into the unknown and darkness, then it was the least he could do.

Her hand reached out and touched the bark of the tree. "I'll apologize forever, if it means you'll come back, Hiei... I'll never do something like that again, I promise."

It was not a promise he wanted to hear. Neither was her apology. How could he punish her for taking what she wanted when it was part of what he was teaching her? It was his fault that he had not been paying attention enough to realize what she was going to do before she did it. And as much as he hated the feelings that came with it, he loved the feel of her lips against his.

Now that was a thought he could not get off his mind. A miko had willingly kissed him. Half of him wanted to rub it in the fox's face as he was certain Kurama had never been willingly kissed by a miko. Yet the other half of him won out. He wanted her all to himself without any of his friends knowing about her.

If he had it his way, she would stay his secret. Just as he knew he was hers. One day, definitely not anytime soon, he would tell her about his friends. For now though, he just had to make it back to Tokyo and to her. He needed to clear up any misunderstandings between them as soon as he could. If only to make sure she never forgot about him.


A version of this chapter was posted to the livejournal community 30_Nights for their bonus theme #038. Alone at night.
Word count: 1569
Edited: 3 June 2010