InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ A Slayer of Nightmares ❯ Chapter Three ( Chapter 3 )

By the time that Kagome ran outside, Inuyasha was long gone. She knew how fast he could move, and she knew her only hope was that he was stomping off at a somewhat human rate of speed rather than racing like lightning.

She didn't know whether to laugh or cry about the mess. Laugh, because he was alive and she'd unexpectedly found Shippou too, or cry, because Inuyasha obviously had Issues with a capital "I" that were beyond anything she'd seen from him in the past ... could she do both laugh and cry?

The only person in sight was a homeless guy standing at a bus stop -- Kagome hurried over to him. "Did you see a guy with dog ears and silver hair come this way?"

The man pointed down a trash-strewn alleyway, wordlessly. Kagome broke into a run. Shippou was right. She absolutely couldn't let it end on this note. Something was very wrong with Inuyasha, but damnit, she wasn't going to let him go on this sort of bad note.

He could kill me, she thought, with a chill, remembering that furious rage. Soon as he heard Slayer, he attacked me. I don't understand that. It wasn't even a rational rage. It was like a switch flipped in his head.

However, she was unsurprised to come around a corner and find him waiting for her. For a moment, she hoped, Was it all an act? Maybe somebody was in that bar that he was putting on an act for. Now he's going to apologize, and I'll find out what's going on, and ...

"Knew you'd follow me." He crouched, fighting stance, blatant threat. His eyes weren't quite sane. She stopped short -- she could plant his nose in the dirt again if she had to, but he'd been serious in his threat earlier. She would have to sleep sooner or later, and with his nose, he could find her anywhere in the city.

Dog-boy never was that subtle. Mostly, he just attacked. Worked, too, most of the time.

She was uncomfortably remembering just how vicious he was. Inuyasha wasn't a vampire that she could kill without even breaking a sweat. He was deadly dangerous, and more than a match for her. If not for the rosary, she would be dead now.

"Get lost, Kagome." At least he was using her name. That was something.

"Inuyasha, give me five minutes. Please." If he turned to go, she knew she'd let him -- she could sit him for that, too, but again, she was finding herself genuinely frightened of him and of his reaction. Something had pushed him past the point of sanity, and she wasn't suicidal by far.

"Fuck no!" To her dismay he did turn, and she stood frozen between following him and just dropping the matter for now. If he really didn't want to speak to her, did she even have a right to push the matter? It had been five centuries for him, and he obviously barely remembered her. She felt hurt, betrayed. How could he forget?

"Hey!" A voice shouted, at the other end of the alley.

Inuyasha spun back around, fixed her with an amber-eyed accusatory glare, and said several dirty words ending with, "... your buddies!"

"My what?" Two girls were coming from one direction and one from the other.

"Gods-damned Slayers," he growled. The threat was so blatant in his stance that Sit, boy! was on the tip of her tongue out of sheer self defense. He continued in a tone of blatant menace, "I knew meeting that damned kitsune was a bad idea. This trap was your idea, wasn't it? Or his?"

"Trap?" She said, stunned he'd even think that she'd double-cross him. Obviously, it was a trap, but not her idea. "I'd never betray you, Inuyasha! That's ridiculous!"

"Then you're a bigger idiot than I thought." He growled. The girls were coming fast -- moving with superhuman speed. "I can take these bitches."

"I'm with you, not against you! Damnit, I left my bows home," Kagome said, mentally cursing her choice of clothing for about the hundredth time that night. If she'd worn her trench-coat she'd have had at least her short-bow slung across her back, hidden along with a handful of arrows from view. But no, she had to be a girl. Look good for the cute guy.

The girl on the right was blond, tiny, and very fit -- Kagome's Slayer-instincts were pegging her as the biggest threat. Behind her was a woman with red hair who wasn't running quite so fast or hard. In the other direction, a dark-haired girl, Latina maybe, led the way. She had a similar deadly vibe.

The girls skidded to a halt a few feet from Inuyasha and Kagome. The blond girl said, "Fancy meeting you here again, pretty boy. I'm ready for round two if you are."

"You're alive," Inuyasha said, in apparently disbelief. "What does it take to kill you, woman?"

The dark-haired woman snickered -- the red haired woman also laughed. Kagome shot her a worried look; the red-head was holding back from the fight. She's more dangerous than she looks. Dark-hair said, "More than you've got, demon. Who's the girl?"

"A friend of his," Kagome said, as Inuyasha simultaneously snarled, "She doesn't matter. You're dead, Buffy!"

He launched forward, aiming solely for the blond woman. Kagome expected to see her shredded limb from limb. It was very tempting to Sit Inuyasha but she held her breath instead. These were not friends even if they were apparently human. Buffy. Spike's Buffy? Does he know she's here?

She hadn't missed the longing note in Spike's voice when he'd spoken of his friend. If this was Spike's Buffy, she wasn't a bad guy, and Spike thought the world of her. This, Kagome realized, was a complete mess of a fight.

Buffy smoothly stepped aside and kicked Inuyasha in the back as his momentum carried him past her. Inuyasha had reflexes that were unbelievably good; he didn't even stumble -- just turned the blow into more momentum, bounced off the wall, and launched himself back at Buffy.

A word of power rang out. Kagome, miko, recognized magic -- big magic, huge magic -- as the red-haired woman threw her hands up and caught Inuyasha in mid leap with power that crackled and snarled across him. He hit the ground with a boneless crash and the Latina woman was on him instantly with a jeweled knife. She stabbed at him; Kagome heard the impact as steel met bone, and Inuyasha howled in agony.

"NO!" She leaped into the fight with a swift kick. Inuyasha, Inuyasha ... "You can't!"

The woman blocked her blow with a startled oath, but the knife went flying. "Buffy! She's a Slayer!"

"Don't! He's my friend!" Kagome stood over Inuyasha as they circled her. She could hear Inuyasha breathing hard and struggling to rise; that blow wouldn't have stopped him -- she'd seen him keep fighting after his brother punched a fist all the way through his gut -- but the mojo had apparently done something bad to him.

"He's a demon." That came from the red-haired witch. "Do you know what he's done?"

"I don't care! I'll kill you if you come any closer." Kagome honestly meant it; she'd never contemplated taking another human life before, but for Inuyasha ...

"He's killed twelve of our girls in the last three years, and damn near killed me," the blond woman said, with frank anger in her voice. "I'm all for liking the bad boys ..." this got a snicker from both of the other women, "... but Inuyasha's a bit much, don't you think?"

"Kagome ..." Inuyasha said weakly, "Get out of here. You don't want to be involved in this mess."

Oh. At least that sounded friendlier. Was he acting earlier, or had he decided that she was a friend -- at least in the enemy of my enemy sense? She glanced back, saw dark hair, and a blood-stained t-shirt and her eyes widened. "What did you do to him?"

"Umm, Buffy?" That was the red-head. "Look at the demon."

Buffy's eyes flicked over Inuyasha. "Wil?"

"He's a hanyou," Kagome realized that -- for the moment -- they were pausing the fight. She crouched next to Inuyasha, ignored his attempt to swat her hands away, and pressed a hand down over that bleeding chest wound.

"Half demon, Buffy," Willow translated. "Half inu-youkai -- a Japanese dog-demon -- by the look of him. I shut down his demon powers; he turned human. Kinda like a werewolf."

"So?" Buffy said, with a frown. "He's proven he's too dangerous to let live. And he's not like a werewolf; he's quite rational as handy-you whatsit. He's evil, Wil. And half dog-demon? Like, ewww in a birds-and-the-bees type thing. There's got to be something illegal about that."

"No!" Kagome balled her fists up, willing to take all three of them on, even though she suspected that this was going to be a losing fight. And she wanted to hit Buffy first for that slur against Inuyasha's mother. "I won't let you!"

"She's a Slayer, Buffy," Willow warned, "Be careful."

There was a sudden blur beside her -- and Shippou stood there. Kagome let out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding -- she wasn't surprised to see him, and assumed he'd followed her after he'd sent her off in pursuit of Inuyasha. He folded his arms and said, "Normally, ladies, I'd be fighting on your side. But you don't get to kill the hanyou; this has been a fuck-up of Shakespearian proportions and I've had about enough."

Wow, he's grown up, Kagome said, recognizing a good bit of authority in the kitsune's voice. The little kid had definitely been replaced by a grown man. Terror she hadn't been fully aware of drained out of her. Shippou's confidence was very reassuring. His stance was relaxed; he was more indignant than angry.

"Willow?" Buffy said, "What is he?"

"Kitsune," Shippou said, easily, answering Buffy's question himself.

"Kitsune are generally not evil," Willow said, carefully -- Kagome gave her a mental point for knowing her mythology. There was caution in her voice that bespoke of some awareness of just how much trouble a kitsune could be when provoked, too. "What are you doing with that monster?"

"He's an asshat, not a monster. There is, actually, a difference." Shippou sounded somewhat annoyed, more than anything else. Kagome almost laughed at his annoyed tone -- he sounded pissed off in general, and that anger was almost certainly aimed at both Inuyasha and the Slayers. "And you guys have to admit you've sorely provoked him."

"Well, well, this actually feels like old times," Spike said, stepping out of the shadow. "'Lo, Buffy. Faith. Red."

Buffy's mouth dropped open, then snapped shut, and her eyes narrowed. "You died."

"Hey, I wrote you a letter telling you I was back." Spike said, defensively. To Kagome's surprise, he stepped in line beside her. and Shippou. "You gonna fight me too? Because we're not letting you touch Rover."

"Spike! He killed Kennedy!" Buffy said, then added, "You died! You jerk!"

Spike snorted. "There's more to that story, I'm betting."

"She killed Amelia." Inuyasha's voice held plenty of that hot, furious rage. Kagome actually winced at the note in his voice; the anger there explained a lot about his behavior and she suddenly had a glimmering of an idea about what had transpired.

The Slayers had killed someone he had cared about -- and Inuyasha, loyal to a fault, had taken it very, very badly. Explains why he's a few french fries short of a happy meal at the moment. He's not in his right mind now, not thinking clearly, because the grief and rage is clouding every thought he has.

He tried to stand up. Kagome, sensing an escape might be possible, reached down and hooked her hand under his elbow and hauled him to his feet. He stood swaying and bleeding and looking very, very human and very injured and very angry.

Inuyasha also tensed, clearly contemplating another attack. Both she and Shippou simultaneously flung hands up, stopping him short. Shippou said, "Kagome, get him out of here. We'll catch up with you later. I'll slow them down -- Spike, you with me?"

"Oh, yeah," Spike said, with enthusiasm. "Been awhile since Buffy and I tangled. This'll be fun!"

"She could kill you ..." Inuyasha protested, sounding weak -- but also very worried. That worried note was music to Kagome's ears -- it sounded like the hanyou she knew, who actually did care about other people despite his attempts to make it appear otherwise.

"Nah. Get out of here!" Spike said, "Me'n Sailor can hold them off."

"Spike, what do you think you're ... awk!" Buffy made a startled noise when Spike swung at her. "Spike, damnit!"

"C'mon, Buffy, you want the hanyou, you get to come through me first." Spike's words were taunting, teasing; full of evil mischief. The blond Slayer looked like she'd been simultaneously hit upside the head with a sledgehammer and handed a winning lottery ticket ... she was just standing there now, staring at the vampire. Her friends didn't look much better.

Kagome didn't have to be told twice to scram -- she ducked under Inuyasha's arm and half-carried, half bullied him down the alley. Behind her, Spike was laughing and Buffy was now swearing with volume and vigor to rival Inuyasha at his worst. The other Slayer was not happy and most of her fury was now directed at Spike. Who seemed to find it funny, judging by the amused noises and comments he was making.

When Kagome risked a look backwards it was to see Spike body-check the Slayer to stop her from pursuing them; Buffy finally hit Spike and a battle was on, with enthusiasm.

Shippou was tangling with Faith and the witch both -- Kagome almost wished she could stop and watch that fight. She had an idea that Shippou was probably a pretty heavy hitter these days in the battle department. But flight seemed to be a wiser option by far.

It was a curiously liberating feeling to be stronger than Inuyasha, at least temporarily (she hoped the spell was temporary) and to be the one rescuing his butt. He was swearing at her and she simply ignored him.

There was a bus at the end of the alley -- she scrambled through the doorway, rummaged in her pockets for the appropriate change to pay both their fares, and then said to the startled bus driver, "Just a flesh wound. He'll be fine."

The man gave Inuyasha's bloody t-shirt another skeptical look, but let them board. Bus drivers in this part of town probably saw it all ... She chivvied him to the back of the nearly empty bus and said, in English, "Sit down."

"If I don't?" He sounded sullen and angry. He hadn't liked being manhandled, but he hadn't had much option.

"You'll be doing a face plant."

He growled something under his breath, but sat the easy way, on his butt. Once sitting, he closed his eyes and leaned back in the seat; by the way he was seated, she didn't think he was hurting all that bad now.

Kagome sprawled into the seat across he aisle from him as the bus pulled away from the curb. For the moment, they were safe -- and she wasn't too worried about Shippou. Or Spike. "What did you do to piss the Slayers off that bad? Spike said they were good guys."

Spike actually told me some stories about helping those women fight evil. She spared a moment's worry about him doing battle with his allies on their behalf, then decided he probably knew more about the dynamic there than they did.

He was so quiet, for so very long, that she didn't think he was going to answer. When she glanced over at him, he had his head rolled back and he was staring upwards at the ceiling of the bus. She was astonished to see tears brimming in his eyes. "Inuyasha?"

"Fucking Slayers." He blinked rapidly, folded his arms in a way that would have hidden his hands in his sleeves if he'd been wearing his haori, and glared at her.

"Inuyasha? At least tell me why the good guys want you dead."

"I killed a bunch of them." He bit the words out. "Damn near killed the blond, too. Tried. I hope Shippou's going to be okay."

Twelve humans, she realized, with a cold chill. Inuyasha, for all his anger and resentment in the past, had never been a killer. Twelve women known for being on the side of the light, if what Spike told me was right. "... why?"

He wouldn't meet her eyes now. "They killed Amelia. Shippou better watch himself. I don't want to lose another ... I've lost too many people."

"When did they kill Amelia?" She asked, quietly.

"Maybe ... three years ago." The pain and heartbreak in his voice was audible now. It hurt, still, despite the years. Once, she would have hugged him. Now, his expression was so forbidding that even human she was scared of him. She wouldn't dare touch him; he'd probably object. And he needed a hug.

"You don't want to hear this story," he warned, opening his eyes and fixing her with an unblinking look. "It'll hurt you."

"Glad to hear you don't want to hurt me, my friend. I was beginning to wonder."

"I don't give a shit about you one way or another. I just don't want to deal with a weepy little girl."

"You're welcome," she snorted -- once, she'd have known it was just attitude talking. Now, she pretended it was, but she really wasn't sure. His words were too raw, too harsh. Still, it was easy to fall back into the old pattern of sniping and sarcasm. "Saving your butt was no trouble at all."

He should have responded with a 'Keh!' but all he did was give her a dirty look. She sighed and hid her slowly breaking heart with a pat on the shoulder. "You know I couldn't have just let them have you, Inuyasha. I'm not like that."

"You're going to get hurt, Kagome."

The bus lurched to a stop. She stood up, and said, "Let's get off here and grab a cab. I want to lose those Slayers as thoroughly as we can."

"Yeah, good idea." He forced himself to stand up. "Let's get out of here. Bus smells like piss."

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An hour later she pushed the door of her apartment open and hauled a very unhappy hanyou through the doorway, pretty much against his will. He protested loudly, "I don't want your help!"

"Fine. When you're recovered enough to get away from me, feel free to take off. As long as you're weak enough that even I can shove you around, you get to put up with my presence. Inuyasha, you're acting like I've got rabies or something." She had a good grasp on a handful of his t-shirt -- he'd tried to pull away in the parking lot after the cab had let them out and he hadn't even been able to tear the fabric. Whatever the witch had done to him had taken all his powers away, leaving only a wounded and very angry human man.

"I don't need your help," he repeated, stubbornly. She was equally stubborn -- and more than willing to risk his later wrath if it kept him safe until he recovered his strength. After killing her fair share of demons and vampires over the last three years all on her own, summoning up the guts to manhandle one friend who, in her judgment, needed to be manhandled, was nothing.

She marched him into the bathroom and pointed at the toilet. "Sit there. Can you take your shirt off or do I need to get the scissors?"

"It's just a cut." He sounded sullen, and he was glaring at her. But he did sit down on the lid.

"And you're human for however long it takes us to get rid of that spell. Be glad I'm not hauling you off to the emergency room for stitches." She rummaged in the drawers under the bathroom counter to find the first aid supplies that she kept on hand -- she had to patch herself up after fighting things on regular basis.

The problem with taking him to the emergency room for stitches was that she didn't know how long the witch's spell would last -- she could sense the power (and it was white magic) and it didn't have the feel of something permanent. It could last for hours or years. Hours would be a bad thing if he reverted back to a demon in the emergency room.

Plus, she seriously doubted he had health insurance. And judging by the way he was moving (fairly easily) and the lack of large amounts of blood, this was probably something she could deal with herself. She did have a fair amount of experience with treating minor to moderate injuries.

He gave her a look of protest, but shrugged out of his shirt -- he moved a bit stiffly when he raised his arms, but didn't seem to be in extreme pain from the knife wound. The cut had mostly stopped bleeding; it was deep enough to see a bit of bone but hadn't penetrated between his ribs. The knife had skidded off his ribs, she realized -- if it had slipped between two of them, with him human, he might well be dead now. They'd truly been intending to kill him. As it was, it had cut through a bit of skin and muscle but didn't appear to have hit anything vital or done any lasting damage.

"That was a hit, wasn't it? Like an assassination?" She asked, quietly, sobered. He'd definitely made some very bad enemies.

"Yeah." He said. His lips were a thin, angry line and he glared a hole in the wall for a moment before adding, "Murder would be another word I'd use."

"I'd agree with you there."

"Heh." He gave her a sideways look and she smiled encouragingly and he looked away.

Inuyasha sat in stony silence while she washed the cut out, stuck the edges together with butterfly bandages and dabs of superglue (and she knew from personal experience that superglue did work well, but it stung), and then she covered it with a telfa pad and some fabric tape. She completed the dressing with an ace wrap around his thin chest, to hold everything in place and keep some pressure on the cut for awhile -- it was still oozing. "There. All patched up."

Silence.

"You're welcome, Inuyasha."

Grudgingly -- very grudgingly -- "Thank you."

She smiled at him. "See? Good manners aren't so hard."

"Keh."

Thank god, she thought, relief at that familiar little noise almost making her knees weak. My Inuyasha is really in there somewhere.

He stood up, padded into her living room without a word, and flopped on the couch. Since she'd half expected him to bolt as soon as he was out of grabbing range she was relieved by that -- but he wasn't stupid, and he was vulnerable while he was a human. She sighed and started cleaning up the bloody washrags and assorted detritus left over from Inuyasha-repairing, and wiping the blood off the floor where it had dripped.

His t-shirt was a total loss, and his jeans had blood on them. After picking the bathroom up, she retrieved t-shirts and sweats from her dresser; they were actually pretty close to the same size now that she'd grown a few inches in height. He caught the clothes one-handed when she tossed him his way; to her amusement, he sniffed them quickly. It was a gesture that was so very much Inuyasha that she had to smile. "Let me have your jeans and I'll wash them. I'm just going to toss your shirt."

"Fine." He grunted, shrugging quickly into the shirt and then padding back into the bathroom, presumably to change his pants.

She leaned against the wall, sudden relief surging through her veins. I've found him. He's hurting and he's broken but he's still Inuyasha and I've found him.

"You want some ramen?" She called through the door. "I haven't had anything to eat; I'll make dinner. I'm sure you're hungry too."

"I'll eat." He didn't even sound hostile when he said that.

Yep, that's Inuyasha.

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She wasn't the slightest bit surprised when he curled up in a ball on her couch and fell asleep minutes after eating. By his reactions, and his general attitude of incredible suspicion and no small amount of fear, he'd been on edge for a long time -- she hoped he felt safe in her home, though she suspected the blood loss and pain of his injury, along with being hit with a fairly significant spell, had pushed him too far. Even Inuyasha had emotional and physical limits.

The Slayers don't know my name, much less where I live. I think we're safe for the night. Though I wish I knew that Shippou and Spike were okay.

Kagome covered him with a blanket, then just regarded him with a fond smile for a moment. Asleep, his face had relaxed and he looked so very, very familiar -- his human-dark hair was coming loose from its clip and fell around him in ebony waves. She'd seen the angles of his cheekbones, the curves of his lips, and his long eyelashes in her dreams for years.

He muttered and twitched a bit, then reached up and yanked the covers over his head. Hiding, she thought, and her heart broke all anew.

Oh, Inuyasha, my friend, I wish I could make it all better for you. You never deserved to be hated and feared; you never deserved any of the crap that's happened to you.

After watching him sleep for half an hour, her own thoughts in a muddle, she finally turned into the bedroom and crawled into bed. It was getting late, and she had work and school tomorrow. Mundane things. Maybe I'll call in -- I'm scared if I leave, he won't be here when I get back.

Hell, she was scared to go to sleep -- he might slip out before she woke.

Perhaps it was thoughts of Inuyasha escaping that caused her to sleep lightly despite her own fears. A few hours after she drifted off into restless, dream-filled slumber, a noise woke her. Blinking, muzzy, she stared at the ceiling and identified it as: Shower running.

Huh. Did dog-boy finally learn to like baths?

She lifted her head from the pillow and realized it was around one AM.

Okay, that's weird.

She blinked and sat up, then kicked her way free of the covers and went to investigate. Inuyasha was acting sufficiently odd to have her paranoia kicked up to the highest notch possible. She knocked on the bathroom door and asked, "You okay?"

No answer.

She glanced at the couch -- no, he was definitely in the bathroom. The couch was empty except for the quilt. "Inuyasha? You better tell me you're okay or I'm coming in."

Silence.

Cautiously, she pushed the door open a crack and peered inside.

Through the glass enclosure she could see that he was sitting in the shower, apparently naked, and she almost shut the door with a squeak. Then she saw red and shoved the door open so hard it hit the wall and made a dent. To her relief, he jumped at that noise, motion obvious through the fogged and water-stained glass.

But there was definitely red in the water that was swirling around him and down the drain.

"Inuyasha!"

Not caring that he was naked, she yanked open the glass and hissed in dismay. He looked up at her, expression utterly unreadable. He had a small paring knife from her kitchen drawer in one hand, and blood trickled freely down his arm. The shower was ice cold -- he'd been sitting there for a long, long time she thought.

"Get up." She grabbed him by the arm and used quite a bit of Slayer strength to yank him to his feet. "What kind of stunt are you pulling?"

The cut was shallow, she realized -- he'd traced the line of a vein, but hadn't cut deep enough to sever it. It was just a bloody scratch. He was shivering violently and he stared at her now with blue lips and eyes that were devoid of anger: now they held only incredible grief and sorrow and terrible age. His eyes showed his years, she realized with a chill. He'd been thinking about slashing his wrist, but he hadn't actually gone through with anything.

"I could do it right now," he whispered, "I can't, as a hanyou. But I could do it now. I could end it. I could be with her."

"Who? Kikyou?" She reached up, grabbed a towel off the rack, and thrust it at him. He realized he was naked, and yanked it around his waist.

"Amelia." He said it like a caress. A chill ran down her back at that tone; he'd loved this woman. "Kagome, leave me be. You don't want to get involved. You're only going to get hurt, you're only going to hear things you don't want to. I don't need your help."

"Okay, Inuyasha? My best friend is sitting in a tub contemplating killing himself and you expect me to just walk away? Get real." Inside, she was panicking. This wasn't the Inuyasha she'd known -- oh, Inuyasha could brood with the best of them, and his temper was legendary, but he'd never been suicidal. Ever. Something truly terrible had happened to him.

Silence was his only answer. But he gave her a wary sideways look that said he was thinking about that statement.

"Get dressed." She grabbed the knife from his hand. Fear turned to anger -- he dare he think of doing this. Didn't he understand how much it would hurt her? "You have two minutes or I will dress you myself. Possibly after I sit you unconscious."

He blinked. And he still said nothing, which scared her -- she wanted him to argue, to rage, to throw things. She wanted angry, snarky Inuyasha to surface. She'd rather he be coming at her in a homicidal fury than standing there shivering and avoiding her gaze. Inuyasha was one of the proudest men she'd ever known, and right now, he looked like a little lost boy. Gods. I didn't realize how bad it was, though I should have -- he's no killer, but he's killed humans and he tried for me. He's been pushed over the edge by something. He's broken.

The furious rage, earlier, had been just as out of character for him as this. This grief was the truth behind that anger -- he was so badly wounded that she was having a hard time seeing her Inuyasha in this shattered shell of the man she'd once known. Anger was only a symptom of incredible soul-searing despair.

She sighed. "Inuyasha, whatever it is -- I'm your friend. There isn't a thing in this world that will ever change that."

He blinked at her again, shuddered with sudden cold, and reached for the clothes.

"Two minutes." She shut the bathroom door, padded into the kitchen, and started a pot of coffee. It was just starting to percolate when he emerged, dressed, the towel pressed against his arm.

"Sit." She pointed at the couch -- she said the word in English to avoid unfortunate accidents with the rosary.

He sat down, still not saying much, and yanked the quilt around his shoulders.

"Do you drink coffee now?"

"Blech."

She wasn't surprised by that, somehow. He didn't like strongly favored foods. "Want tea?"

No answer, which she took to be a yes -- or at least, not a negative. She set a tea pot on the stove and regarded him with no small amount of panic in her heart. She really didn't even know where to begin. He was just sitting there.

She busied herself in the kitchen, thinking furiously. This Amelia seemed to be at the heart of everything. He obviously had cared about her deeply.

"Kagome," Inuyasha said after several moments of silence, "Why are you doing this?"

"Because you're my friend, you idiot." The answer -- and the annoyed tone she delivered it in -- came naturally. She didn't even have to think about it.

"You probably don't want to hear this," he said, quietly, "But it's been five centuries for me. I ... I know we were friends once, but it was a long, long time ago."

"I sorta got that part when you didn't recognize me."

"What did you expect?" He lifted an eyebrow at her.

"It's only been a few years for me. I remember, even if you don't." She poured him a cup of green tea and made herself a coffee, then carried both over. "Here. Drink."

"Kagome, I'm not sure you really understand." He sipped the tea. "I ... I remember your name, and a few things, but mostly, those days are as faded as a dream. When I see you, it's there's a sense of deja vu and no more than that. I remember we fought a lot and I liked arguing with you for some reason, but I don't know what the arguments were about. I remember Shippou was just a tot, but I couldn't tell you what he looked like. I couldn't tell you what any of them looked like. And -- there aren't any of the feelings there that I think you want me to have. I remember loving you, but I don't now. It's just been too long."

"Then we'll have to start over anew as friends." She was amazed at how calm she sounded -- and how much his confession hurt. It made sense, but it didn't suit her dreams very well of a happily every after ending. She settled onto the couch beside him. "Inuyasha, when you're in a better state of mind then you can order me out of your life if you want and I will go. Right now, you need someone. Shippou said you don't have anyone." She paused. "Though Shippou cares about you a lot, I think."

"Brat."

"That hasn't changed much?" She asked, smiling into her coffee, because she liked hearing the snark creep back into his voice.

"He's just harder to beat up now."

Despite everything, that made her laugh softly -- because that sounded like Inuyasha. There were flickers of the man she knew lurking in there somewhere. Maybe with time and care, she could coax the old Inuyasha back out.

He sighed. There was a hitch and a hiccup in that tiny little noise that made her look up, suddenly.

His eyes were brimming with tears. "Damnit." He wiped at them with the back of his hand. "Damnit, damnit, damnit." He hit himself in the forehead with the heel of his hand. "Stop crying, idiot!"

"'S okay." She twisted around to face him and pulled him closer to her with an insistent tug on his shoulders. He resisted, for an instant, face twisting away from her, clearly not wanting any comfort, and she said firmly, "Inuyasha, come here."

Then, suddenly, he caved. With an almost desperate lunge he grabbed hold of her. He shuddered, making no noise, just trembling and shaking and heaving great gasping breaths. She wrapped her arms around him and just held him as he clutched at her pajamas. He was crying hard -- she could feel her shoulder growing wet with soundless tears. His hair was still soaking wet, and he was shivering as well. She reached over and tugged the quilt around both of them.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. "Whatever happened, I'm so, so sorry."

Slowly, the tension eased from his wiry frame. He hiccupped and muttered something under his breath.

"C'mere." She shifted her position a bit for comfort. "You're my friend, Inuyasha. You might have forgotten, but I remember for both of us."

He heaved a long, ragged, shaky sigh and moved a bit on the couch -- she thought he was going to pull away, then she realized he was simply getting into a better position against her. His arms went around her in a sudden fierce hug. "I do know that I was missing you terribly for years and years, Kagome. Now I know why."

"Inuyasha, it's okay, I think. We can start over as friends." She paused, and tried to lighten the mood a bit by saying, "Hey, if you don't remember all the times I 'sat' you that might be to my advantage!"

"I remember that," he growled. Then he paused, and said, "You're hurt, though. I ..." He swallowed; she heard it. "I don't think I like seeing you hurt because of me."

That was an Inuyasha-apology if she'd ever heard one.

"So do you want to tell me about Amelia?" She asked, quietly. "You don't have to if you don't want to, but ..."

His hand stroked her hair, startling her. He seemed to realize he was doing it, too, and quickly put it back on her shoulder. "Amelia was ... Kagome, I know you're not going to like hearing this, but she was my all and my everything. The center of my world. The only person I could rely on, the only person who was always there for me, who never hurt me, who ... who never left me! She saw me for who I am."

"I'm glad you found someone like that," Kagome said, honestly. I never left you, you sent me away. "I didn't exactly expect you to pine away to nothing or wait five hundred years."

"She was my wife," Inuyasha whispered into her hair. "She was my wife, we were married four hundred and fifty years, and she died a senseless death. The Slayers killed her and it was my fault because I didn't listen to her when she told me to back down when I got in an argument with the Slayers over something completely stupid. You would have just 'sat' me until I came to my senses."

"Four hundred and fifty years?" She said, stunned. She'd assumed, for some reason, that Amelia was a short-term thing. Recent. Gods. The depth of his devotion ... of their shared love ... she swallowed hard.

He pulled away, suddenly, drawing into himself. "I was wrong, Kagome. I can't ... I can't even talk about it."

"Inuyasha, I'm sorry."

"It was three years ago and it hurts as much as the day it happened." He leaned back, and said, bitterly, "I wish I could just join her, you know? It would be so much easier." He jerked his chin at the door to the bathroom. "Only thing that stopped me tonight was the knowledge that her death is yet un-avenged while that blond bitch still lives. That, and I didn't want you to find me like that after you've been so caring to me and I haven't exactly been grateful. But sometimes ... sometimes I think it just doesn't matter. That I'm just tired of fighting. I'm seven hundred years old, Kagome, and sometimes I'm just so tired."

She tried to find something to say, but the only thing she could think of was, "I'm so very sorry."

"Feh. So am I." Tears apparently over, he stood up, walked into the kitchen, and dumped the remains of his tea into the sink.

"Kagome?" He said, looking at her across the breakfast bar. "Umm ..."

"You're welcome, Inuyasha." Though she didn't think she'd helped all that much, really. Knowing at least some of the story behind his grief didn't change much. And she hadn't a clue what to do now.