InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ A Smile for Tears ❯ A Smile for Tears, Act I ( Chapter 1 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: PaolaAdara 
...she loved him, unconditionally, realized beneath the boughs of the God Tree, hundreds of years away from his time. [InuKag]
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama | Type: Vignette | Uploaded On: 10.04.2006 | Updated On: 04.07.2007 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 683 | Status: Work In Progress
...she loved him, unconditionally, realized beneath the boughs of the God Tree, hundreds of years away from his time. [InuKag]
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama | Type: Vignette | Uploaded On: 10.04.2006 | Updated On: 04.07.2007 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.1K | Visits: 683 | Status: Work In Progress
Title: A Smile for Tears (1/?)
Author: Paola
Disclaimer: A Smile for Tears is based on characters and situations that belong to Rumiko Takahashi (and other production affiliates that have the right of ownership). No money is being made, and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Considerations: Similarities to other stories/events/passages are purely coincidental unless otherwise cited.
A Smile for Tears
Act I: Once upon a time, there was a damsel in distress locked away in a tower by a dragon…
Every time he went off on his own, a tumble of butterflies always unsettled her stomach. It wasn’t the same harbinger of euphoria that threatened to overwhelm her with excitement. It wasn’t the same butterflies that fluttered during flirty encounters with anonymous crushes. It wasn’t the same sensation she got whenever she expected to get a high reward after burning the midnight oil.
It just wasn’t the same.
It wasn’t pleasant. It was a dark feeling, foreboding, because she knew, she always knew, that the mulish set of his jaw, the way he wouldn’t meet her eyes, the way his ears flattened meant something that wouldn’t sit well with her heart.
Every time he went off on his own, she feared, not because he might get hurt, but because she knew she would. Every time he went off on his own, she feared, not because he might secretly fight a horde of demons alone, but because she would be fighting solitarily her own demons. Every time he went off on his own, she feared, because she knew he visited a memory she never had a place in.
The memory was his alone, a burden to carry, a promise to fulfill, a vow to honor, a haunting task so loyally attended to that his fidelity left bitter traces in her mouth. It was choking, it made her sick, and it made her love him all the more, the contradiction of her emotions so striking, like a perverse color of brightness in a sea of black.
A soul for a soul, a trade she couldn’t rival.
She told herself that she could love them enough for the both of them, but it sounded empty in her mind, it felt hollow in her chest, it weighed her heart, and her soul couldn’t rise from the ashes he’d unknowingly left her in. He’d left his mark in her heart, engraved every letter of his name so deeply that she bled every time he fled from her presence to chase a dream, a dream that should have been fulfilled – shattered – a dream that was full of yearning, promises…hurt. Bitterness over a betrayal that killed and sealed.
He acted jealous, he acted like he would stay, he acted like he needed her, but a fleeting glimpse of a ghostly face rendered him reneging on his promise. He’d told her he would protect her, but he was too cruel and selfish as to play both the roles of protector and executioner. He delivered her from harm, only to afflict her by his actions.
For countless of times, he fought for her, almost gave up his life for her, showing her that she was important, but that paled in comparison to how he’d given himself to another. He was willing to get injured for her sake, but he was willing to burn in hell for another.
And through all this, she would wait, like a faithful puppy, the roles reversed, their races confused. Then he would come back, bloody, torn, haunted, the trail of an unaccomplished task staining the air around him, stifling, deadening, but never had he come back to an empty cave, a hollow shell, an unwelcoming coterie. He would never have to come back to find himself alone. She would always be there, welcoming him back into her life because his place there would never waver, never be closed off, never be gone. She would smile and dress his wounds, get angry at him like she was expected to, but always lacking the edge in her voice, the contempt that should have been rightfully there. She couldn’t get mad, not really, because he had already captured her heart, sealed it with a smile.
It was funny that despite trying to kill her, when it all came down to it, he’d had her at hello, while she’d given everything and still he wasn’t hers. It was unfair, it was screwed up, but it was okay, because every time he would go away, he would return. She’d never taken this for granted, never dreamed to take this for granted, because she would never know when his silent departure would turn into a permanent goodbye.
For all his flaws, she loved him, unconditionally, realized beneath the boughs of the God Tree, hundreds of years away from his time. She came to love him in the present, a subjugating feeling she harbored in the past. She was the priestess who overcame the hanyou in the legends of her time, a story that threaded great awe, touched the hearts of teenagers and adults alike, but what the legends didn’t say was that she wasn’t the priestess who’d captured his heart, sealed it with an arrow, and suspended it through time.
She would smile understandingly whenever he would try to make sense of his garbled explanations, smile as the awkwardness would eventually give way to familiarity when their companions dispelled the uneasy air with their facetious antics, smile even when her jaw hurt, smile even when the sting in her eyes grew, because if she would just continue to smile, everything would be all right. If she continued to smile, the other wouldn’t exist. If she continued to smile, he would stay, and for now, that was all that mattered. For the night, he would stay, as for a whole week, a long breath of journey, until he would feel the need to leave again, until he would decide to break her heart just a little more, add another crack even before she could finish taping the pieces back together.
Until then, Kagome would smile, because somehow, that kept Inuyasha by her side, even for just a short while, even for just a few heartbeats.
-End of Act I
A/N:
It’s an experiment, both in the way of writing (I don’t know, like narrative-poetry, maybe?) and the fandom. If it sucks, it sucks; if it doesn’t, then hurray for me!
Author: Paola
Disclaimer: A Smile for Tears is based on characters and situations that belong to Rumiko Takahashi (and other production affiliates that have the right of ownership). No money is being made, and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Considerations: Similarities to other stories/events/passages are purely coincidental unless otherwise cited.
A Smile for Tears
Act I: Once upon a time, there was a damsel in distress locked away in a tower by a dragon…
Every time he went off on his own, a tumble of butterflies always unsettled her stomach. It wasn’t the same harbinger of euphoria that threatened to overwhelm her with excitement. It wasn’t the same butterflies that fluttered during flirty encounters with anonymous crushes. It wasn’t the same sensation she got whenever she expected to get a high reward after burning the midnight oil.
It just wasn’t the same.
It wasn’t pleasant. It was a dark feeling, foreboding, because she knew, she always knew, that the mulish set of his jaw, the way he wouldn’t meet her eyes, the way his ears flattened meant something that wouldn’t sit well with her heart.
Every time he went off on his own, she feared, not because he might get hurt, but because she knew she would. Every time he went off on his own, she feared, not because he might secretly fight a horde of demons alone, but because she would be fighting solitarily her own demons. Every time he went off on his own, she feared, because she knew he visited a memory she never had a place in.
The memory was his alone, a burden to carry, a promise to fulfill, a vow to honor, a haunting task so loyally attended to that his fidelity left bitter traces in her mouth. It was choking, it made her sick, and it made her love him all the more, the contradiction of her emotions so striking, like a perverse color of brightness in a sea of black.
A soul for a soul, a trade she couldn’t rival.
She told herself that she could love them enough for the both of them, but it sounded empty in her mind, it felt hollow in her chest, it weighed her heart, and her soul couldn’t rise from the ashes he’d unknowingly left her in. He’d left his mark in her heart, engraved every letter of his name so deeply that she bled every time he fled from her presence to chase a dream, a dream that should have been fulfilled – shattered – a dream that was full of yearning, promises…hurt. Bitterness over a betrayal that killed and sealed.
He acted jealous, he acted like he would stay, he acted like he needed her, but a fleeting glimpse of a ghostly face rendered him reneging on his promise. He’d told her he would protect her, but he was too cruel and selfish as to play both the roles of protector and executioner. He delivered her from harm, only to afflict her by his actions.
For countless of times, he fought for her, almost gave up his life for her, showing her that she was important, but that paled in comparison to how he’d given himself to another. He was willing to get injured for her sake, but he was willing to burn in hell for another.
And through all this, she would wait, like a faithful puppy, the roles reversed, their races confused. Then he would come back, bloody, torn, haunted, the trail of an unaccomplished task staining the air around him, stifling, deadening, but never had he come back to an empty cave, a hollow shell, an unwelcoming coterie. He would never have to come back to find himself alone. She would always be there, welcoming him back into her life because his place there would never waver, never be closed off, never be gone. She would smile and dress his wounds, get angry at him like she was expected to, but always lacking the edge in her voice, the contempt that should have been rightfully there. She couldn’t get mad, not really, because he had already captured her heart, sealed it with a smile.
It was funny that despite trying to kill her, when it all came down to it, he’d had her at hello, while she’d given everything and still he wasn’t hers. It was unfair, it was screwed up, but it was okay, because every time he would go away, he would return. She’d never taken this for granted, never dreamed to take this for granted, because she would never know when his silent departure would turn into a permanent goodbye.
For all his flaws, she loved him, unconditionally, realized beneath the boughs of the God Tree, hundreds of years away from his time. She came to love him in the present, a subjugating feeling she harbored in the past. She was the priestess who overcame the hanyou in the legends of her time, a story that threaded great awe, touched the hearts of teenagers and adults alike, but what the legends didn’t say was that she wasn’t the priestess who’d captured his heart, sealed it with an arrow, and suspended it through time.
She would smile understandingly whenever he would try to make sense of his garbled explanations, smile as the awkwardness would eventually give way to familiarity when their companions dispelled the uneasy air with their facetious antics, smile even when her jaw hurt, smile even when the sting in her eyes grew, because if she would just continue to smile, everything would be all right. If she continued to smile, the other wouldn’t exist. If she continued to smile, he would stay, and for now, that was all that mattered. For the night, he would stay, as for a whole week, a long breath of journey, until he would feel the need to leave again, until he would decide to break her heart just a little more, add another crack even before she could finish taping the pieces back together.
Until then, Kagome would smile, because somehow, that kept Inuyasha by her side, even for just a short while, even for just a few heartbeats.
-End of Act I
A/N:
It’s an experiment, both in the way of writing (I don’t know, like narrative-poetry, maybe?) and the fandom. If it sucks, it sucks; if it doesn’t, then hurray for me!