InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Afraid ❯ Afraid ( One-Shot )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Disclaimer: Inuyasha is the property of Rumiko Takahashi, not me!


Inuyasha jumped carelessly from branch to branch across the skyline. It was a cold, icy night, and the brightest of stars had come out to shine. He was silently cursing himself, jerking his silver hair out of his golden eyes as he used them to carefully scan the horizon, looking for something important. Or, rather, someone.

'I'm such an idiot!' He inwardly cursed, completely regretting what he had done earlier that evening.

"Inuyasha, why? Why won't you just talk to me? Maybe I could help..."

Inuyasha growled at the woman before him. She had no right at all to stick her nose into his business or his feelings for that matter.

"Just leave me alone, Kagome," Inuyasha snapped at her.

A brief wave of hurt crossed Kagome's eyes but it dissipated quickly and was replaced with anger. She knew she was being a little intrusive, but she had had enough of being completely shunned and ignored by him. He'd been miserable and snappy at her and their friends for weeks now. Sure, at first it was understandable, but he didn't need to keep doing this to them so long after it happened. He was hurting himself more than anyone.

"Inuyasha... Please, can't you just -” Kagome began.

"Get lost wench! I don't wanna see your face ’round here anymore! I'm tired of you lot pestering me all the time!" InuYasha yelled in her face.

Kagome was stunned, to say the least. Never had he said such a thing to her before.

"Inu-"

"SHUT UP! You know what? You should just go back home, Kagome! Go home and never come back! It would save me so much trouble! You're always getting your stupid ass into danger, and I'm sick and tired of wasting my time getting you out of it! Why couldn't you have been more like Kikyou?!" Inuyasha bellowed, finally finishing his rant.

Kagome stood there for a few moments. Utter shock and hurt came creeping up inside her. It was like Inuyasha had just slapped her in the face. She had never felt so hurt by a person's words before and they cut into her soul.

Almost instantly Inuyasha's face softened as the realization of what he had just said dawned on him. He had really done it this time. He could see the hurt and sadness in her eyes, the hurt and sadness he had put there. He hadn't meant to say something like that at all, he was just so angry lately, but not with Kagome, or anyone else. He was angry at himself. And he had just taken it all out on Kagome.

Inuyasha reached out a hand slowly to touch Kagome's face but she backed away. She looked at him with so much pain. She wasn't crying, but inside he knew she was breaking. Why did he always have to hurt her so much?

Kagome stood there. Inuyasha wished she would say something, anything. The silence between them both was unbearable. Inuyasha reached out his hand to her again.

"Ka...Kagome I -” But he was cut off. Kagome swiped his hand away, and began backing away from him and into the forest.

"Just - Just... Just don't Inuyasha. I... I can't stand it anymore." Kagome said, her eyes shimmering. She turned and ran away from him.

Inuyasha tried to call out her name, but no sound came. He knew he had deserved it, but it still stung him. It stung him so much, the way she had swiped him away. But why?

Inuyasha shook his head. He had to make things right again, he had to find Kagome. He took off at a sprint behind her.

That was where he had found himself, searching for Kagome, praying he could make it up to her somehow. So far he wasn’t having much luck tracking her. He blamed it on the fact that tonight was the new moon, the time the half-demon became human. He had been to the well that led back to her time, but could find no trace of her being there. She had to be somewhere in the forest. He only prayed he could find her before another demon did. He would never forgive himself if she got hurt because of his carelessness and stupidity.

Kagome sat deep in the forest, knees held up to her face, silently sobbing to herself.

She was so angry. She felt so hurt and betrayed. Inuyasha had finally said it, told her who he valued more and he had chosen Kikyou.

At that point, Kagome felt a little guilt in her heart, but pushed it away. Kikyou had been killed by Naraku a month ago, and Inuyasha had been devastated. The way he continued to act toward his friends, especially Kagome, showed he was still hurting. Kagome understood and as much as it pained her she knew that Inuyasha had, and most likely still, loved Kikyou with all his heart.

No matter what anyone did to help, Inuyasha still continued to mourn her. He shut himself away from everyone else, refusing to interact with them unless it was necessary. Kagome hated that he did this to himself; she only wanted to help, or comfort him in some way. She wanted to remind him he still had friends who cared for him, who would be there for him. Tonight however, had proved how little his appreciation stretched for his friends, and especially for her.

'Why do you always do this, Inuyasha?' Kagome thought through her sobs. She failed to notice that someone had come up behind her. Suddenly Kagome felt his presence, and turned round to be met with the eyes of the half-demon she loved and currently held deep contempt for.

"Go away, Inuyasha," Kagome spat, "I don't want to talk to you right now." She turned away from him again.

Inuyasha couldn't bear seeing her like this. It hurt him that she hurt. The pain in his heart was made worse knowing he was the one hurting her. He felt so alone lately. He had lost Kikyou to Naraku, and it had hurt him deeply. He hadn't meant to push Kagome away. The truth was he needed her now more than ever. He was afraid. Afraid to show how he was hurting, to accept comfort from her, to show her his weakness.

One last sob from Kagome was all he needed. He jumped forward to sit by her side. He wrapped his arms around Kagome's waist, pulled her into his lap and hugged her tightly, burying his face in her hair.

Kagome felt surprise momentarily replace her upset. He was hugging her? After everything that he had said? After she swiped him away? Ran away from him? Kagome still felt so angry and upset with him, but she couldn't help to return the hug he was giving her. She buried her face into his chest, the tears flowing onto his haori.

"Why Inuyasha? Why do you always do this to me?" She choked out to him. Inuyasha felt his heart leap when she returned the hug. Was it possible she had forgiven him?

"Ka-Kagome...please...please try to understand." Inuyasha whispered into her hair.

Gritting her teeth Kagome tried to push him away, but he held her firmly, refusing to let go.

"If you want me to understand, why can't you just tell me what’s wrong! I know that you've been hurting because of Kikyou's death, but why don't you let us, let me, help you? I hate seeing you so sad, Inuyasha! Why can't you help me to understand? Let me help you." Kagome begged of him.

Inuyasha listened to her intently. He hurt even more now. He did want to open up to Kagome, let her take all his pain away. But he couldn't.

"I can't Kagome, I'm sorry."

Kagome slumped in his arms, but instead of trying to pull away again, she held on tighter.

"Why Inuyasha? Tell me why you can't let me help you."

"I..." Inuyasha wasn't sure how to say it. "I'm afraid." He finally said.

"What are you afraid of?" Kagome asked.

"To show weakness.” he said slowly.

"Weakness?" Kagome inquired.

"I'm afraid to show weakness in front of you. Telling you and letting you help me would be showing weakness."

Kagome listened. He was afraid to show weakness? He was afraid to let them know how sad he was about the whole ordeal? He shouldn't have to feel it was a weakness to show emotion.

"Inuyasha, I... I know it must be hard for you but I want to let you know, showing emotions like that isn't weakness. Emotions can make you stronger in a way,” she told him, as InuYasha listened carefully.

"I just want to help you, Inuyasha, to comfort you. I really do hate seeing you so...isolated. I don't want you to feel you have to be alone in this, Inuyasha, because you're not; we're all here for you. Shippo, Miroku, Sango, all of us. You don't have to be afraid, Inuyasha."

At hearing this Inuyasha held her tighter, if that were possible. She was right, and he knew it. It was still hard for him though, and he knew it was hard for her as well. Inuyasha stayed quiet. Kagome had lost her anger from before, but she still felt some of the hurt, only this time for a different reason.

"Inuyasha? It's okay. You don't have to open up to me yet. Just know I'll always be here for you and I'll be there when you are ready."

Inuyasha winced slightly at the hurt in her voice. He knew he was still hurting her but felt he couldn't do anything to stop it. That pained him too.

"Kagome, thank you," he told her. “You always know what to say. You're always there for me, offering your comfort and support, even when I don't deserve it. I don't know what I'd do without you, Kagome, you're so important to me, so special. I wish I knew how I could show you how sorry I am that I hurt you like this." Inuyasha told her.

Kagome smiled at that.

"Inuyasha, just hold me. Don’t let go. Not yet."

Inuyasha did as she asked, more than happy to oblige. He figured just holding her was what he needed at this point, and she, too, it seemed. It was curious how this girl's presence could make him feel so happy. He absentmindedly brushed the crown of her head with his lips.

Kagome felt the gesture, and buried her face deeper into his chest, arms wrapped tightly around his waist. She knew he needed time, but she was happy for now just how they were, holding onto each other, and it seemed Inuayasha was, too.

That made her happier than she had felt for a long time.

This fic was dedicated to Kagome In Love: Still appreciate ya, gurl!