InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ An Inu-Yasha What if...? Story: The Sacred Tree ❯ Falling into the Deepest Dreams ( Chapter 5 )

Part V: Falling into the Deepest Dreams

A voice. He heard it. Ever so soft, ever so lightly. Whispered onto the winds of the ages. What had it whispered? A…a name… Yes, a name. Spoken so tenderly, so gently, with a wave of love echoing behind it. This soft whisper pushed him. Pushed him, towards the light… a brilliant light…

ACK! Pain flashed through his being. A burning blinding pain that pierced his heart and stole his will. He retreated into the darkness. He knew it wasn't like him. He knew that he should have fought toward that brilliant light, with the tender voice at the end… But he didn't have the strength…yet. Not yet. Soon…

He retreated into the depths of his mind, his imprisonment. Deeper and deeper into the light of his dreams. His dreams. The one thing that had maintained his sanity through illusion and insanity. He gave into his dreams and lost himself into the visions, into the past. Sweet memories, harbored fantasies, hopeful illusions, tender dreams… All of which revolve around one person. One life. One smile. One laughter.

Her eyes shone as he found his way into her arms. Here in his dreams he could be with her. It was his prison, his cage, but it was also his healing, his dreams. He knew that the visions of her were only images of his mind, images that kept him locked within, but they were sweet images that made the unbearable darkness bearable, that made the shadows come to light.

Until she freed him, he was trapped with only his memories and dream shadows of her.

Her hazel eyes glowed at him and her arms opened. She smiled brilliantly and he was lost again. Lost into the recesses of his mind, lost into his sweetest memories.

Kagome stared out her window and up at the full moon. The cool breeze wafted around her and she tightened her shawl. She remembered peaceful nights like these. Sango snuggling unconsciously to Miroku, Kirara sleeping in the crook of Sango's arm and body. Miroku's face looking angelic despite his usual delinquent demeanor, his breathing even and his hand resting slightly on Sango's hip, traveling no farther. He was far more polite in sleep than he was in wakefulness…sometimes. She remembered Shippou snuggling into her body heat or sleeping on her lap. Tears filled her eyes for the millionth time and she swallowed them back… Inu-Yasha, his eyes closed in a peaceful sleep, his arm draped about her shoulders protectively, warmly. She remembered his scent. The scent of the forest and of the storm and of warm male. She saw his smirk, his flashing eyes and a moment of heroic triumph. She remembered the worry in his eyes whenever she was in danger and his indomitable will.

Kagome rubbed her eyes. Kami, how she loved and missed him. Everyday, every single day, since the moment she had returned, she thought of him. Dreamed of him. There was a time at the beginning when she had feared going to sleep. Feared it with every fiber of her being. Feared seeing him, feared loving him, feared it, knowing it was only a dream and that was all it would ever be.

She sighed lightly and then smiled at the moon. To this day, on the nights of the full moon and the nights of the new moon, she would remember him most acutely. She could swear that she could smell him on the wind and feel the heat of his gaze on her. Kagome's heart clenched. She lifted her hand and placed it over the pained organ. Inu-Yasha…

The wind whispered about her and she could have sworn she heard his voice murmuring her name among its tendrils. "Kagome…"

Kagome imagined his arms wrapping around her once more, imagined she could feel the beat of his heart against hers. She shook her head, erasing her visions. Nothing but lovely dreams. The night was cold and his embrace was no longer a part of her life. But she knew, oh, she knew with every bit of her being she would never love another the way she loved him. She knew it. Some loved and some recovered from their love-but she knew she never could. He was her world…and without him, it was an empty lonely place.

She stepped back, closing the windows and shutting out the wind and his haunting scent. There were days…whenever a storm was coming that his scent on the wind became more powerful, more potent. Greenery became alive, expecting the wash of rain, and forests opened to the skies. It was on those days that she couldn't even walk outside the house with taking two steps and shedding tears. Tonight and probably tomorrow would be one of those days.

Kagome locked the window and tossed the shawl aside. She slid into her bed and let her exhaustion from her crying fit today weave itself over her. Her eyes closed and she drifted into dreams.

Kagome looked about in confusion. She was in her negligee, and there was a soft mist drifting about. It clung fleetingly to her skin and then slowly wafted away. As far as she could see, there was only whiteness and the gray mist… Yume ka? Was this a dream? Her heart began to pound heavily in her chest. This mist…the mist…smelled like something. It had a scent. She took a deep breath, trying to detect where it was from.

She collapsed onto the floor, her knees giving out on her… It was Inu…Inu-Yasha's scent. It was thick and heavy all around her, like the coming of a storm. She heard thunder in the background and her heart pounded. Kagome lifted her head and the scenery had changed. She was now kneeling in a field of poppies, storm clouds threatening overhead. Surrounding the field was a lush forest and thunder cracked in the distance. Lightning flashed with its brother and the mist still hung heavy about her.

"Kagome…"

Kagome whirled about, her heart beating wildly in her chest. That voice… She had heard it…She did… she heard it. It had been his voice. His husky tone, rumbling like the thunder in the distance. Her skin prickled and her body grew heated. Her nipples beaded and her blood felt like it was rushing through her body. She was reacting to the voice as if it were really he, as if he were there. Her heart twisted painfully in her chest… Why…? Why was this happening…?

"Kagome."

She stiffened her spot, her heart hammering against her rib cage like a wild animal trying to break free. Hot breath was at her neck, and her whispered name hung in the heavy mist like a cherry blossom caught beneath the rain. She didn't dare turn around…she didn't dare.

A clash of thunder echoed from afar and she saw the lightning that accompanied it. The clouds released their load, and hard drops of cold rain poured down from the heavens. Despite the onslaught, Kagome's skin was still on fire…

"Kagome…"

She closed her eyes, hot tears seeping out of them. Suddenly she felt two warm hands on her shoulders. She stiffened. The hands slid down her slick arms, wet with the rain, down to her waist. There the hands settled and slowly turned her. Kagome was numb, the sensations the hands drew from her body, making her immobile. It was then she faced her tormentor.

She gazed into blazing golden eyes, golden eyes that flashed with vibrant life of the thunder strike.

"Inu-Yasha…"

The hanyou before her was older than the one she remembered… And he was nude; the only thing clothing him was his long silver hair. His ears twitched at the sound of his name and he let out a low groan. He pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. Kagome wrapped her arms around him and clutched him to her, her fingers losing their grip on his rain-slicked skin. She wanted to hold him to her forever…even it was just a dream…she never wanted it to end.

"Inu-Yasha…" she whispered on a choked sob.

He moved back and she stared into his eyes. He smiled at her and rubbed his thumb over her lips. "Don't cry, Kagome. All I want to see is your smile…" he gave her a wicked smirk and her heart did a somersault in her chest. "And I want to hear you scream my name into the stormy skies as I bring you to pleasure."

Kagome blinked, her heart careening madly. "Na-nani? Inu-Yasha?"

He grabbed hold of the hem of her negligee and tossed it off her body. He lifted her against him, causing Kagome to gasp and all he did was chuckle seductively. He laid her down among the dripping poppies and moved over her.

All Kagome could do was gasp his name.

Kagome moaned in the darkness of her room, her legs spreading to an invisible will. She turned her head slightly and arched her back, calling out softly a name into the silence of her room.

"Inu-Yasha…"

Kagome slowly opened her eyes, her body humming from Inu-Yasha's loving. But instead of being greeted by cloudy skies or a sunny one, the stars shone down on her. There was no moon in the sky.

She sat up, noticing she was still in the field of poppies, but Inu-Yasha was gone from her side. She was still nude and very confused. What had happened? Where was Inu-Yasha?

Suddenly an explosion resounded behind her. Kagome whirled about and stared at a battle. A monstrous youkai was attacking two humans, a woman and man. The man was covered in blood the woman's quiver was empty of arrows. There was a thud and clang beside her. When she turned, she saw...

Kagome gasped and the hand of fear squeezed her heart. It was the Tetsuaiga and its sheath. That meant… Kagome's gaze flew back to the man and woman and she recognized them. It was an older Inu-Yasha in his human form, bloody and torn. Kikiyou, who looked the same, stood behind him.

What…what is going on? What is this? Kagome stood up and tried to reach for Tetsuaiga, but her hand passed through the sword. Na-nani? She couldn't touch the sword? But then… She heard the youkai's bellow and turned to see him slash at Inu-Yasha. The now human hanyou took the blow in his abdomen sending both him and Kikiyou flying backwards and into the forest. The youkai let out another cry and went after them.

Kagome's eyes were wide on her face and her breathing coming in gasps. Her heart twisted and she let out a tortured scream.

"INU-YASHA!!"

She raced after Kikiyou and Inu-Yasha, heedless of her nudity. When she reached them, the youkai had yet to find them and Inu-Yasha was still trying to escape. Inu-Yasha could barely move. Blood dripped from almost every opening in his body, his fire rat's fur, mutilated and falling off his broken body. Tears filled Kagome's eyes. She moved more closely to them until she could hear their voices.

"Shi-ku-sho. Why did it have to be tonight of all nights? Why do they always have to get lucky and come after the Shikon no Tama on the first night of the new moon? What's so special about tonight?"

"Inu-Yasha…"

"Dai-jo-bu, Kikiyou. I won't let it hurt you or get the Shikon no Tama."

"That's not it, Inu-Yasha."

Kagome watched the bloody Inu-Yasha turn to Kikiyou. "Nani, Kikiyou?"

"Why didn't you tell me about this?" she asked her eyes staring at him.

"About what?" Inu-Yasha murmured wincing. He groaned and collapsed against a tree. He flinched again. Kagome saw his violet eyes become faded.

"About the day when you become human. You never told me about it. Not even when we were together before Naraku."

Inu-Yasha groaned. "Now's not the time, Kikiyou. But if you must know, it wasn't important then. I was going to become human for you…what did it matter the day when I turned human or not?"

Kikiyou's hands drifted away from him. "You didn't trust me."

Inu-Yasha growled at her and then collapsed onto the ground. "It has…nothing…to do with that. It wasn't…important…"

"But you told her, didn't you?"

Kagome's eyes widened. Did Kikiyou mean…?

Inu-Yasha rolled his eyes and tried to get up. "We have to keep moving, Kikiyou… We have to…" He fell against the tree he was using to help himself up. He winced with the pain. "Shi-ku-sho!"

"Answer me, Inu-Yasha."

He growled and turned to Kikiyou. "Hai, I told her…but more like you. She found out. We got into trouble like this on the first new moon I was with her and she found out."

"Did she find you useless because of your human form?"

Inu-Yasha was silent. Kagome held her breath, fear crawled up her spine. Move Inu-Yasha! The youkai will be here any minute!

"Iya. She risked her life to save mine."

Kikiyou stared silently at him. Kagome shook her head. Why won't they move?! What is going on?!

Inu-Yasha tried to get up again. "Hi-ya-ku, Kikiyou. We've got to leave here… The youkai will be on us in a minute." Kagome sighed. Finally, some semblance of wisdom! Hurry up, Kikiyou! Get him out of here! He'll die if you don't!

"Kikiyou…how much longer till dawn?"

"Dawn is very far from now, Inu-Yasha."

Inu-Yasha bowed his dark head, his bloody lips twisted ruefully. "Shi-ku-sho…"

"With these wounds Inu-Yasha… you won't last till dawn. You'll die before then." Kagome's heart tore. NANI?! HE'S GOING TO DIE! IYA!

Inu-Yasha drew a deep ragged breath and took Kikiyou's hand. "Let's go. We've got to move. Even if what you say is true, Kikiyou, I'm not going to die by the hands of that lowly youkai. I'm going to get you and the Shikon no Tama to safely. Hi-ya-ku…" And with that Kagome saw Inu-Yasha gather his strength and he pulled Kikiyou onto his back and began to run through the forest.

Kagome stared after them, tears in her eyes. "Iya…Inu-Yasha… You can't die…I won't let you! Not like this!" She raced after the pair.

When Kagome finally caught up to them…so had the youkai. She made it in time to watch Inu-Yasha use the last of his strength to send the demon hurtling over a cliff. If Kikiyou hadn't caught Inu-Yasha by his tearing haori, he would have fallen with the youkai. Kagome heaved a sigh of relief…until she saw Inu-Yasha's state. He was lying on the floor, bleeding profusely from every open wound on his body, creating a bloody waterfall over the cliff. His head was on Kikiyou's lap, his blood blending with the red of her hakama.

Not caring whether they could see her or not, Kagome rushed to his side. BAM! An invisible wall stopped her from reaching him when she was two feet away. She couldn't even reach out to try and touch him. "INU-YASHA!"

Inu-Yasha blinked, almost as if he were trying to refocus his eyes. "Ka-Kagome?"

Her eyes widened and she tried to go through the invisible wall again. But to no avail.

"I knew it."

Both Kagome and Inu-Yasha turned to Kikiyou. She sat silently for a moment before she spoke. "In your sleep, Inu-Yasha, I would hear you…calling out for her, dreaming of her. I realized quickly that the reincarnation of me had done what I didn't get the chance to do. She melted your heart and made you truly love her. You trusted her in a way you never did me. And in the end, instead of seeing me in her…you saw her in me. To you, I'm only a shadow of the person I was and the person I will become. Even now, at your death, it is her you see." Kikiyou stared at him. From where Kagome was, she could see the light fading from Inu-Yasha's eyes. Kikiyou continued. "I can almost see what you are thinking, Inu-Yasha. You are almost happy that you are dying, because now there is the possibility that you can be reborn, in her world…"

Kagome gasped, tears spilling. Iya…Inu-Yasha can't be dying… IYA! "INU-YASHA!"

Inu-Yasha turned his head away from Kikiyou and toward the sound of Kagome's voice. She saw the life in his eyes fade even more. "Ka…gome…" he reached out toward her. Kagome tried to reach him, tried to touch him, but could not. Her heart was pounding frantically in her chest, fear overriding all of her senses as she tried to get to him… But nothing worked.

"Do you see her now, Inu-Yasha…as you die? Is that why you call out her name?" Kikiyou murmured.

"Ka…go…me…" he whispered hoarsely once more, the Shikon no Tama falling out of his haori and shining with the starlight. Kagome made another desperate attempt to break through the barrier holding her back.

"Kikiyou, dammit! Why don't you do something?! Save him!" Kagome screamed. "INU-YASHA!!"

Kikiyou shook her head. "You won't live till dawn so you can heal. You're dying. And I'll put you out of your misery, Inu-Yasha."

Kagome gasped and pounded on the barrier one last time and suddenly everything when black. She heard a last exhaled breath… "Kagome…"

Abruptly, there was a flash of light and she saw the bloody, dying Inu-Yasha appear before her, his body thrown back, his black hair beginning to turn white, his ears pointed. The light of the dawn shown in his empty wide-open eyes, his jaw was open in a scream and an arrow was piercing his heart…

"KAGOME!!"

"INU-YASHA!!"

Kagome screamed wildly into the darkness of her room. Her sight was blurry as she heaved for breath. Her pajamas were glued to her skin…she was in a cold sweat. Her hair was plastered against her face, neck and head, tears ran in torrents down her cheeks. Her entire bed was soaking with her sweat and tears and she was having trouble breathing.

Her mother, grandfather and little brother ran into the room.

"KAGOME!"

Her mother was the first one at her side. "Dai-jo-bu, Kagome? Are you all right? What happened? Oh, dear, Kami, you're soaking from sweat…"

"She's crying! Dear heavens, Kagome-chan, what kind of nightmare did you have? Are you all right?" her grandfather asked.

Kagome was trembling…and she couldn't stop. She stared at her mother through tear filled eyes and let out an anguished cry. She threw herself into her mother's arms and wept out all the fear and grief in her heart. "MAMA!"

"Shhh…Kagome…" her mother whispered and rocked her back and forth. "Let's get you out of these soaking clothes and into a hot bath. You probably don't remember the nightmare that made you get into a cold sweat, but that's all right. Shhh… Now come on, baby."

Kagome nodded and slowly got up with the aid of her mother and grandfather. She met her brother's eyes. He had recognized the name she had called out in her nightmare and he knew that unfortunately the nightmare wasn't forgotten. It still vibrated in the depths of her soul and tormented her spirit and her heart.