InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Betrayed ❯ Pain ( Chapter 5 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Chapter Five: Pain

 

                As Kagome sat waiting for executioner to walk through the door she couldn’t help but feel bad about how she had treated the poor servant. She had only been trying to do her job and now it was likely that she would be punished along with Kagome. Not to mention the harsh words that had left her lips made Kagome feel numb. If that was the type of person that the pain was turning her into then maybe it was better if she died hear. If she held that much anger in her heart, then she would never be able to keep the Jewel pure any way. All Kagome could do was hug herself as she allowed more tears to fall from her eyes. She just wanted it all to be over, she didn’t want to deal with this pain any longer than she had to. It was too much for her and she wasn’t strong enough to overcome it not this time.

                That was how Sesshomaru found her a crying mess on the floor and he had to resist the urge to role his eyes. She had been like this for a week now and it was time that she left her room. That was all he was trying to accomplish with his request for dinner. He had not confined the Miko to her room it was she who had chosen to stay in there even after the healers begged her to walk in the gardens with them. It had been her choice to isolate herself and he had allowed it for a time but that time was past.  It was time to start moving forward and stop these foolish actions.

                When the servant had rushed to him shaking and scared he had been prepared to drag her out in whatever she was wearing at the time and weather she had bathed or not. But seeing her a crying heap on the floor stopped his brash actions. Sesshomaru couldn’t understand why her crying on the floor stopped him. It had never stopped him before and there had been thousands who had cried at his feet. The fact that he had changed his mind irritated him even more. This whole situation was taxing on his patients.

                “Miko!” He growled out and he visibly saw her jump as she looked up at him from her place on the floor. ‘Good she is afraid.’ He thought as he allowed a smirk to play on his lips. “Tell me why is it that you don’t want to eat? Are you planning on starving yourself now that we have taken away all your other options?” Kagome didn’t bother to answer him she didn’t see the point. She knew the end result would be the same. “Miko was I don’t the one who saved your life?” It was then that Kagome’s head shot up.

                “I did not ask for you to save me!” Kagome bit our as she pushed herself to her feet to face him. Her angry blue eyes clashed with his cold golden ones. The eyes that reminded her so much of InuYasha and she hated him for it. She hated him for saving her even more.

                “And yet this Sesshomaru saved you a lowly human from death you should be grateful.” Sesshomaru could see the fire flare in her eyes at his last words. ‘So that fire is still there she just has to find it again.’

                “I did not want to be saved! I remember asking you to kill me!” Kagome shouted at him. “But no you couldn’t do that for some odd reason you start acting like you give a rat’s ass about anyone but yourself for a change!” Kagome could feel her anger rising in the pit of her stomach.

                “Miko, if you continue to carry on like this you will force my hand so I suggest you calm yourself.” He had to admit her ranting and raving was the first thing that he had seen her do other than cry but standing hear yelling at him was not going to solve anything.

                “You want me to calm down!  It’s your fault I’m hear in the first place!” In that moment Kagome’s anger took over and in that moment she raised her hand with the full intention of slapping Sesshomaru across his smug face but her hand never meet her target. By the time that Kagome’s brain had caught up with her body she had found herself pinned to her bed with Sesshomaru on top of her. Kagome couldn’t help the smile the made its way to her lips, this was it he was going to kill her. Kagome was going to get what she wanted all along.

                A shiver ran up her spine as she felt his hot breath next to her ear. “I know what you’re doing Miko.” It was in that moment her heart sank. “I know your trying to push me to the point where I will end your life it won’t work.” He paused as he thought of his next words. “This Sesshomaru did not save you out of the goodness of my heart. I did it because the Kami have asked me to. That is the only reason you are nothing but a tool to end Naraku and save this Sesshomaru’s lands!”

                “You bustard your just like InuYasha!” Kagome yelled as she tried to push him off of her but to no avail.

                “It is up to you how you spend your time hear Miko. It can be enjoyable or I can make it miserable. That is up to you.” Sesshomaru completely ignoring her last words. “Now I’m going to send Kiki back up here to take you to the springs to wash most of your stench off of you. If you scare her off again or refuse to go I will drag you through the castle to the dining hall in whatever you have on.” Sesshomaru then left Kagome alone feeling even worse than she did before. Was she really, just a tool to use and discarded when she was all used up?

 ****

                Kagome had to admit the trip to the hot spring had improved her mood even if only a little. It felt so nice to be clean and have all the dried blood and sweat washed from her body. But it still didn’t take the sting out of Sesshomaru’s words. There was no doubt to her place in Sesshomaru’s mind.

                “My lady which would you like to ware?” Kiki spoke as she held up two beautiful kimonos. One was a solid black and the other was almost identical to the one Sesshomaru war every day. Kagome couldn’t help but scoff at the idea of matching Sesshomaru. ‘He’s such a bastard.’ Kagome thought as she pointed to the black kimono the color fit her mood much better any way.  “That’s a wonderful choice my lady it will match your hair wonderfully.” Kiki smiled as she cautiously approached the bed where Kagome was sitting.

                Kagome couldn’t help but feel bad for the way that she treated the poor girl. Yes, her life was worthless, yes she was just a tool for people to use but that didn’t give her and excuse to be flat out mean to people. It made Kagome sick to even think of how she acted even more than sick it made her ashamed.

                “Kiki.” Kagome spoke softly and she couldn’t help the twinge of guilt that washed over her as she watched the girl flinch.

                “Yes my lady.” Kagome could hear the uncertainty in Kiki’s voice.

“I want to apologize to you for my actions earlier today. I’m not normally like that.” Kagome sifted her eyes to watch Kiki’s face and Kagome could see that Kiki was unsure of how to respond.

“It’s ok my lady. I am after all just a servant.” Kiki spoke softly as she motioned for Kagome to stand so that she could help he dress. Kagome could feel that Kiki was already less nervous now as she continued her work.

“No, Kiki it wasn’t right for me to treat you that way and you’re not just a servant you’re a person and you should be treated with respect.” Kagome could feel Kiki’s hands paus for a moment as the weight of Kagome’s words took hold.

                “Thank you my lady. No one has ever been so kind to me. When one accepts the life of a servant one accepts all the bad that comes with it. The cruel words from the guests are nothing new. One grows a thick skin when living this life.” Kiki whispered as she put the finishing touches on Kagome’s kimono.  Kagome had to admit that she loved the way the cool silk felt against her skin. She would have to be extra careful with it after all this one kimono could probably buy her house four times over. “Normally what you said would have had no effect on me, but Lord Sesshomaru warned us that you were a Miko.” It was no wonder that Kiki had been scared that’s why she had run. She had been afraid of being purified.

                “Still it was no excuse for how I acted.” Kagome spoke softly as she felt the soft tug from the brush as Kiki ran it through her hair and for a moment Kagome’s mind flashed to when her mother would brush her hair. It had always been a special time for them a time for them to talk about the day. As Kagome, had gotten older those moments had begun to happen less and less. ‘I wish mama where hear now.’ Kagome couldn’t help the tear that made its way down her cheek as thoughts of her mother and her family overwhelmed her. InuYasha had probably already told them that she was dead if he even went back to tell them anything at all.

                It was sad but Kagome hoped that he never told them anything. That way even though she would never make it home her mother could at least imagine that she was happy.  Kagome could feel her heart breaking all over again. Not just for herself but for her family as well. InuYasha had destroyed so many lives than just hers and for the first-time Kagome felt something other than pain. Anger filled the pit of her stomach and she knew that InuYasha had to pay.

***

                Sesshomaru was barely able to suppress his growl of irritation as he waited for the miko to make her interrace. She was taking much longer than he liked. This would be the only time he would excuse her lateness. Rin had tried to fight her hunger and sleep as to wait for the miko to arrive but was not able to hold out and eventually gave in. Rin was now in bed and Jaken was off harassing the servants. Sesshomaru was about to go drag the woman from her room when he heard footsteps making their way to the dinning hall. ‘Finally its about time the woman showed up.’ Sesshomaru thought to himself as he watched the door slide back to revile Kiki and the miko walking behind her.

                The first thing that hit Sesshomaru was the miko’s sent. It no longer carried the lingering smell of death that all humans carried. It now smelled more like a female demon but it was still somewhat different. ‘Her transformation must be starting.’ A small smirk pulled at the corner of his lips. It looked like the Kami were telling the truth this time. She really would be the key to ending Naraku and he couldn’t help but wonder how powerful she would truly end up being.

                Then his eyes landed on her as Kiki moved to lead the miko to her seat to his left. She looked like some dark angle who had swept into his dining hall. The black kimono was fitting for the miko, it gave her pale skin the appearance that it was glowing. And her long dark hair which had all been pushed over her left shoulder looked like a sea of dark water was falling to her chest. ‘Stunning.’ He thought and even though he would never say it out loud he wondered if once her transformation was complete if she would make a suitable lady of the west. Then he quickly dismissed the thought.

                Without a word to the girl Sesshomaru motioned for the servant to bring her out a tray of food. He had ordered human meats to be prepared specially for her. He knew that during the time she had spent in her room she had only eaten fruit and even though a daemon could go for long periods of time without any meat she was different. Her body was still trying to recover its strength and he knew that she needed it.  Giving her one last glance as the servant brought out her tray he turned back to the letter the Northern lord had sent him.

                Kagome thought her eyes were going to pop out of her head as she saw the massive plate of food that had been sat in front of her. There was no way that she could eat all that meat. No human could, well maybe her brother he had become a bottomless black pit that sucked in everything in its path, but she wasn’t her brother and to top it off it all smelled funny to her almost like it was rotting. But Sesshomaru surely wouldn’t feed her rotting meat he was trying to keep her alive. So Kagome decided that she would choke down as much as she could.

                Glancing over at Sesshomaru she was glad he was engrossed in whatever paperwork he was doing. He was already on her shit list and she was sure that she was on his. The silence in the room was almost defining almost to the point of madness, but Kagome ate as much as she cold of the funny tasking meat.

                “May I go back to my room now?” Kagome finally worked up the courage to ask. And she couldn’t stop herself from jumping a little as he looked up from the paper he was reading.

                “If you are done eating then you will accompany me back to my study. We have much to discuss.” Without another word Sesshomaru stood and started to make his way out of the room. Kagome was forced to run just to keep up with his long strides. It felt like she had been fallowing him forever down twisting halls and past so many rooms. ‘I’ll never find my way around this place.’ Kagome thought as they finally came to a stop in front of a large wooden door.

                Sesshomaru pushed it open and Kagome was surprised at how small the room was. There were two book shelves each filled with old scowls and books bound in leather. A single wooden desk with papers stacked to the brim and two sets in front of the fire place. To Kagome’s surprise Sesshomaru did not sit behind the desk but took one of the seats in front of the fire place and motioned for her to take the other one. Kagome did so without complaint as she waited for him to speak. She knew that there was a lot to talk about and she didn’t want to hear any of it.

                “What do you want to discuss. I thought you made yourself pretty clear earlier.” Kagome shot at him as she crossed her arms over her chest.

                “Miko do not test my patients. I can still throw you in the dungeon.” Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes at the woman sitting in front of him.

                “Go ahead throw me in the dungeon or lock me in my room you can’t force me to do anything except to live.” Kagome was so tired of everyone threatening her.  Sesshomaru raised his eyebrow at her comment. The woman did have a point and he truly could not think of a time when some one had been able to force the woman to do anything she did not want to.

                “Then maybe we can come to some arrangement that will work for both of us.” Sesshomaru smirked as he looked her in the eyes.

                “You will kill me then!” Kagome beamed

 

                “Yes. I will kill you.” Sesshomaru smiled at the twinkle in her eyes.