InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Bittersweet Affinity ❯ Forgiveness ( Chapter 3 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha… Honestly, if I did, would I be spending my time writing fanfiction?

Warnings: This story contains M/M, yaoi, lemon…I think you get the idea.

Bittersweet Affinity

Forgiveness

“Ah gentle, subtly changing eyes,

You smiled on me one day,

And all my life in glad surprise

Leaped up, imploring "Stay!"

Alas, alas, oh Golden Eyes,

So cruel and so gay,

You went to shine in other skies,

Smiled once and passed away." --Adela Florence Nicolson (translated by Laurence Hope)

I have become lost in this moment we are sharing together. The cool breeze of this fateful night does not penetrate me, for your body gladly gives its heat to me. We have been in this comfortable silence for…I cannot place how much time has passed. It may have been minutes or hour upon hour. Time has stopped since I've held you once more in my arms.

Lost in my thoughts, you call me back to the here and now. “Sesshoumaru?”

I turn my face to look upon your own. “Yes, little brother?”

“What were you thinking about?” You gently inquire, as you settle more fully into the cushioning blades of grass beneath you.

Sighing, I lie next to you in the waves of green, propping my head up with my arm so I can gaze upon your lovely face. “The past…what was…and what is.”

Your face scrunches up in thought as you puzzle over what I have said. Inwardly, I smile at your childlike expression.

Quizzically, you ask, “What does that mean?”

“Trust me, you do not wish for me to elaborate upon the deep ponderings of my mind. Do not trouble yourself over it, Inuyasha,” I advise.

At this, for some reason I cannot fathom, you smile. It is a distant smile, as if someone just shared an intimate secret with you. Of course, I cannot help but wonder what has made you look this way at this moment.

I question you. “What is the matter, sweet one?”

“You…you called me by my name…”

For a moment, I remain silent. What possible meaning does this hold for you? So I addressed you by your given name…what relevance does this pose? Then I understand. How like you to take notice at such a slight motion.

“Yes, I did. It's how I should have always addressed you. I apologize for rarely ever doing so before,” I say.

Offhandedly, you nod; you still seem to be swimming in the depths of your thoughts. I choose not to interrupt you as you delve among the waves of your mind. We sit once more in silence.

Before long, I once more cannot say how much time has passed, you turn to me. “What happened between us, brother, so many years ago? How did we let this befall upon us?”

As I think upon your question, I absentmindedly caress your ivory skin. I notice you shiver from my touch.

How did we come to lead such separate lives?

How did we allow such a distance to grow between us?

How did we survive without one another?

How did we assume the role of 'enemy' in each other's lives?

How did we lose sight of…us?

I choose my words carefully as I try to clarify things for you…and for me as well.

“Exactly what transpired between us, sweet one, I cannot say. What I do understand is that at some point…a rift was born between us. It pushed us further and further apart, until we no longer recognized one another as `brother'. What caused this division between us…is lost to me. It has been far too long. Due to this, we must leave it behind. But for whatever did occur…and for my ignorance and foolishness of these last fifty years, I am truly regretful…” I trail off.

What I am about to say next, it is difficult for one as proud as myself.

I whisper in your soft, downy ear, “Can you ever forgive me?”

Your ear swivels as the warm breath I let out tickles its surface. With those eyes of golden rays and a look of trust I do not deserve, you gaze upon me. “Of course…but can you forgive me?”

Elated with your response, I tackle you to the ground as if I was no more than a tiny pup at play. Swiftly, I press my lips anxiously against yours, unable to resist their beckoning appearance any longer. As we break apart, our chests are heaving as they draw in precious air, I murmur in your ear. “There is nothing to forgive, Inuyasha...my sweet one…”

You tightly wrap your arms around my neck in a warm and welcoming embrace. We share another intimate kiss, wrapped in the affection of each other's forms. Slowly, I trail light kisses across your chin. As I sensuously drizzle small pecks down your neck, I hear you sigh, simply content to have me in your arms. I then swirl my tongue in the hollow of your neck, eliciting a whimper from your alluring mouth. Lifting myself up a bit, I plunder your mouth for another sumptuous kiss. I gaze into your eyes…oh, those eyes…

Golden suns filled with warmth.

Amber pools overflowing with life.

Yellow sparks shining with brilliance.

Those eyes that sparkle with a love I have never felt, nor seen. Oh, those beautiful, expressive eyes. So like my own…but so very different… So enthralling…

You ask me, “Why are you looking at me that way?”

“Does it displease you?”

With a shake of your head, you reply, “No…it's just that…no one's ever looked at me that way before.”

“And that is a sin, my sweet one. You should be worshipped for the treasure that you are…”

Even in the illuminated darkness, I can see the tinge of rose gracing your cheeks. How cute...how adorable you are.

“I shall do just that, little brother. I shall revere every part of your being,” I declare softly as I bury my nose in your neck to inhale that enchanting scent of yours so I can immerse myself in it.

Now is the opportunity to show to you…

Now is the chance to demonstrate to you…

Now is the time to reveal to you…

Now is the moment to prove to you…how much I love you…

So lie still among these waving wisps of green, as I share with you my heart…

tbc…