InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Broken Fates ❯ All That is Gold Does Not Glitter ( Chapter 7 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Chapter 7: All That is Gold Does Not Glitter

Mika stepped out the door and looked towards the god tree, instinctively noting the miko barrier in place around it, and shaking her head, walked out to Yasha as he watched the young woman that was still crying within its confines.

Her tears had finally begun to slow, but he could tell that it would still be a little while before she would be calm enough for the barrier to drop, and so, he waited - hoping beyond hope that this hadn't set her back any further than she already was. It was all so complicated - how do you know what to say in this kind of situation? What was just right, and what was too much?

"I love her, you know," he said, quietly, as Mika came up level with him. "Last life, this life, next life - it doesn't matter. It never will." He chuckled, then, low in his throat. "The body doesn't really matter, you know? It's like clothing. It's the soul that counts. Kikyou, Kagome, and whoever comes next - they are all her. Only the outer skin changes. What's really different between them is the fact that Kikyou was a child - Kagome is a more grown version of their soul. Same for me and Inuyasha. There's really no need for all this stress over it, if I could just get her to understand that."

Mika eyed him, impressed with his understanding. Truly, he was correct. The body was clothing covering the real person - the soul. And each incarnation was simply a more 'grown', so to speak, version of the soul. After all, that's what life was really all about. It was like school - you're here to learn, and once the lessons of one life were done, you passed on to the next, just like a new grade each year in school. Kikyou was like the middle school version of Kagome - Kagome was the high school version. A little older, a little wiser... but the same soul.

In that way, Kagome trying to deny her past as Kikyou was really just her striking out at herself, and the fact that she had reincarnated wasn't something to be ashamed of - it was no reason to feel as though she were a lesser being. The truth was, it was the other way around. There was no need for her to be so adamant that she was not Kikyou - it was obvious. Her soul had grown well beyond the parameters that Kikyou could have handled.

She was her own person - one that had the experience of being Kikyou at one time - just as her time as Kagome would end, and her soul would move on and inhabit a new body, all set to learn new lessons, and gain new perspectives.

She looked up from her contemplations and slid a glance his way. "I know, Yasha. And she will at some point, too. It will just take time. It is a difficult road to follow, is it not? But you have gained much wisdom from the lessons you've been forced to learn, so it has not been wasted, has it?"

He looked at her, a considering expression on his face. "Yes, I suppose so. Nothing is wasted if you learn from it." He sighed then. "I just wish that not all the lessons had to hurt so much, ya know?"

Mika chuckled then. "Unfortunately, we only seem to truly take to heart the lessons that hurt - if it's easy, we don't notice it, or appreciate it. Ningen and Youkai alike, we are stubborn."

Kagome had been quiet for some time, and she had heard most of what was being said by the two people standing there speaking. It made her extremely curious, but other things had also gotten her attention.

She had noticed the barrier around herself, and wondered what it was - she could tell it was coming from her, but not how she had done it. She sighed, inside. Another thing she couldn't remember. Obviously, since the two standing just beyond it weren't concerned or worried, it was because they were aware she could do things like this, meaning it was another thing she'd forgotten.

I wonder just how much stuff I've lost. It must have been an interesting three years that I'm missing, if this is one of the things I learned to do. Maybe I'll just ask.

She let out a deep breath, and finally pulled herself back up onto her knees. As she did so, the shield dropped, and she turned her head and looked at the two standing there. She could ask about what they had been talking about later - right now, she wanted to find out what that power was.

It was time to get some answers, and they would be giving them, whether they wanted to or not.

She started when her mother stepped out of the door to the house, calling out that breakfast was ready, and then got to her feet, the lure of food too great to ignore.

She could wait to corner everyone until after breakfast. Right now, she was hungry.

---cCc---

Breakfast was uncomfortable. Everyone kept their eyes to themselves, not wanting to upset Kagome, and the sense of an unnatural calm, like the eye of a hurricane, filled the room. It was only a matter of time before the tension exploded, and they all knew it. It was just hoped that the damage could be contained.

Kagome herself was the only one that didn't seem to notice the tension - she was lost in her own world, and Yasha especially wondered what she was thinking.

With his luck lately, it was probably nothing good.

Mika kept an eye on Kagome throughout the meal, without really looking at her. She didn't want to set her off by staring, but she didn't want to miss any possible signs of imminent trouble, either. So far, so good. The girl was calm, and quiet, concentrating on her food, and not much else.

Once she was done, Kagome stood, and ignoring those still eating, placed her plate in the sink and then moved to leave the kitchen. She stopped in the doorway, and without turning around, said, "I have a lot of questions. When you are all done, I'll be in my room. I expect some answers."

She disappeared through the doorway without waiting for anyone to speak.

Aiko stared at the doorway, eyebrows raised. It was obvious that, while Kagome might not remember things form the last three years, her personality was still working on the assumption of those memories, because the Kagome that had just spoken was not the Kagome of three years ago. The Kagome that had just spoken expected to be obeyed.

She glanced at Mika. With a tilt of her head, she indicated the woman that had just left. "Is that normal? I mean, I had always thought that when a person lost their memories like this, you know, lost a certain amount of time, that their personalities reverted, too."

Mika shook her head as everyone looked at her. "Sometimes, yes, but not always. It really depends on the person, and the circumstances. And especially in this situation, I'm not at all surprised that she's still acting as herself, now, as opposed to herself, then. This is due, after all, to shock. Basically, her mind has wrapped itself in wool and put itself in the closet for a brief break, that's all. It's a very temporary situation - in fact, I wouldn't be surprised to find that she'd already had a few flashes of memories come through."

Hikari looked at his daughter-in-law, and shook his head with a sigh. "Following the will of the kami is never an easy path to follow, Aiko, you know that. Kagome will find her way back to us, and she will be a better person for it. We just have to have patience - and realize that no matter how much we all think we are suffering, hers is much greater."

Aiko nodded. "I know." She smiled over at Yasha. "It isn't just her, though, you know. Yasha is in this just as deep as she is, in a different way - and we all need to support him through this as well."

He snorted, tossing a glance at the younger male. "I'm aware that Inuyasha did what the kami needed him to do by sending Kagome home - but I won't soon forgive the way he did it. He couldn't have done worse if he'd tried. If I could get my hands on him I'd plaster that boy in extra-strength sutras from head to toe."

"Yes, but, father, Yasha isn't responsible for Inuyasha's actions, and you know it. Are you responsible for the actions of your own past incarnations? Agreed, there is an overall culpability of the soul, but that's all, and I would expect you of all people, shrine priest, to understand that." Her voice had taken on a disappointed tone, and Hikari flushed and ducked his head, mumbling. No one liked it when Aiko got upset.

Yasha lowered his gaze to the floor and stood, bowing. "He's right. Inuyasha fucked things up, and I'm carrying that burden. He's not the only one that wishes he could get his hands on the bastard, unfortunately, we can't. All we can do now is pick up the pieces and work with what the kami have left us." Turning on his heel, he walked out to the living room to wait for the rest of them to finish.

Mika sighed, sending a reproachful glance to the old man. "Yasha loves her, Hikari. If it had been Yasha back in the past with her instead of Inuyasha, things would have turned out very differently. You cannot blame him for the fate that the kami decreed for them."

"Maybe not. But there is fate, and the kami... and then there is free will. No one made Inuyasha do things the way he did, but he himself. That's my problem with the boy. Not what he did, but how he did it. And as for Yasha - I'm keeping my eye on him. I do believe, from what I've seen, that he loves her - but just because he loves her doesn't mean he won't hurt her."

He stood and left the room, stoic, and determined to guard his granddaughter as much as possible. He would never attempt to thwart the will of the kami, but he could and would try to cushion the shock for Kagome's sake.

As far as he was concerned, she deserved all the help she could get.

---cCc---

Kagome sat at her desk in her room, and turned on her stereo. She felt like listening to a little music while waiting for the others to finish their breakfast and come up to her room. Unfortunately, since it appeared that she'd forgotten the last three years, she had no idea what music was out there. Looking through the cd's sitting on her desk, she picked one at random and put it in, waiting to see what came out.

As the music came on and surrounded her, she stood and wandered over to the window for a moment. A frown crossed her face as a flash of red and silver passed through her mind - a memory fragment triggered by her window. What could it mean? Frowning, she searched through her mind, but that was all she could get... something about a male, wearing red and with silver hair, and her window.

Even though she couldn't get anymore out of her memory, a feeling flashed through her, brought about by the visual in her mind - a feeling of pain, and betrayal, and loss. And then something else registered - these feelings were tied to the handsome guy sitting downstairs in her kitchen - the one who'd said he'd been her husband in another life, and would be in this life as well, someday.

She'd not thought of denying his words, or calling him crazy - something inside had known he was speaking the truth... but not near all of the truth. There was much he wasn't saying, and she knew it. Whatever he was hiding, had something to do with the other male - the one in red. But what? What could it be that he was so secretive about?

Did it have to do with the emotional shock that had caused her to lose her memory in the first place?

Shaking her head in frustration, she looked around her room, noting the mess she'd made earlier, and with a sigh, she began to clean it up, absently thinking that she should try on all these clothes at some point to see what she looked like in them.

How absurd... here I am thinking about clothes, when I've lost my entire memory of the last almost three years of my life. Isn't it funny how the mind reverts to small issues when faced with too much stress?


Picking up one shirt that had landed haphazardly on top of a couple of books, she spotted a dog-eared copy of one of her favorites... The Lord of the Rings, and smiled slightly. She remembered the first time she'd read it - even then, the englishman who'd written it, in his description of 'elves', had instantly made her think of her grandfather's tales of 'youkai'. Two different worlds - and yet, both containing descriptions of supposedly mythical beings that were so similar, she'd wondered if maybe, just maybe, those beings were real, and had been seen by the tellers of these tales.

Mind lost in the book, it automatically pulled out one of the poems in it that she'd loved the best.

The one about Aragorn, son of Arathorn, a golden king hidden amongst the dross, and bound by a promise to a beautiful lady of the race of elves.

All that is gold does not glitter,

Not all who wander are lost.

For some reason, that boy's gold eyes flashed into her mind.

Gold...

Silver and gold, and blue jagged markings writhing across someones cheeks, and wandering - searching for something that was always just out of reach.

That was it - she'd spent a lot of the time of her forgotten past searching for something... but what? No matter how she poked and pried, nothing would come.

Damn, this was frustrating the life out of her!

"Okay, those people need to finish eating already and get up here... I'm starting to drive myself crazy with my thoughts," she mumbled, beginning to get annoyed. "How long does it take to eat?"

Moving back over to the stereo she shut it off, and sat down and waited for her mother and the other two to come in... she could hear them coming up the stairs, and figured it was about time.

She wanted answers - and they had them. She wouldn't tolerate lies... she wanted to know what they knew - after all, it was her past that was at issue here, so she had every right to know what had happened to her in it.

And to hell with them if they refused to tell her. She'd find out one way or another.

She'd left her door slightly ajar, and quietly bid them enter when her mother knocked. She kept her face impassive as she watched them file in, and motioned for the three of them to take a seat. Her mother and the woman, Mika, sat on her bed, while Yasha, the golden-eyed man she both knew, and didn't know, plopped down on her floor near her window.

Frowning slightly at that, as another quick flash of the red and silver boy ran through her mind, sitting in the same spot and in the same position, but holding what looked like a sword caught her attention.

Him, and yet not. What could it mean?

It was still silent, and finally, she dragged her attention from her memory flash to the people now in her room. Looking up at her mother, she said, "Alright. I want to know what I've been searching for for the last three years - and why I keep seeing a guy that looks kinda like him," she gestured at Yasha, "but wearing red and carrying a sword, in my room here. A guy with ears like a dog."

Mika caught Aiko's gaze. "That's what I meant. Already, some things are coming back to her."

"Yeah, but not enough. I'm warning all of you right now," she stared suspiciously at Yasha's sudden pained expression at the mention of the dog-eared boy, "I won't tolerate being lied to. I want answers, and I intend to get them." She caught each person's gaze, letting them know she meant what she said.

"So, who's gonna start?"

---cCc---

Sesshoumaru sat hidden and well out of sight, but within hearing distance, at least, for him. He wanted to know exactly what was going on, but did not want to make things worse. It probably wouldn't be a good thing for her to see him before she had the rest of her memory back - otherwise, all she'd know of him was the enemy he had once been to her... and not the allies that they had become.

While they'd never been friendly, he had come to respect her, and she had also shown him a great deal of respect as well... something that had pissed his idiot sibling off to no end. He hadn't liked Kagome showing any kind of decency to him - funny, how it ended up being him showing her more respect and caring than the hanyou she'd loved ever had.

The fates, he'd found, had a very ironic sense of humor.

He listened, amused, as she laid it out for the people in her room. It would be vastly entertaining to see how his daughter handled the younger woman - Mika had never been one to bow easily to another person's will, but he suspected that she'd met her match for stubborness in the person of the miko. There were times she'd even managed to be more stubborn than he, himself... and that, in and of itself, garnered his respect - no one else had ever even come close to his levels of determination, except her.

Well, at least, until Yasha had come along. That boy was far more stubborn than even his half-brother had been - when he decided he wanted something, he went after it with a single-mindedness that the kami themselves probably admired.

He chuckled, then.

The interactions between his daughter, the miko, and Yasha were bound to keep him occupied and amused for months to come.

He listened eagerly as she basically told them she knew she'd been involved in a search of some kind, and that she'd had flashes of memories of his brother... and sat back in the tree, getting comfortable.

This was going to be interesting... and it had just begun. He had the feeling this talk was going to take a while.

He wondered who would speak first.

---cCc---

A/N: Whew! Wasn't sure I was going to get anything decent out at this point - reality kicked my ass the last few days, and I haven't had much time for anything else. Hopefully, this chapter wasn't too bad, because I'm too tired to be sure. LOL! Anyway, just to be safe, I don't own any rights to Lord of the Rings, or any of the poetry contained within - it just struck me as very fitting - all that is gold does not glitter... so I had to put it in. Anyway, hope everyone enjoys the new chapter, and I'm trying my hardest to catch back up so that I can post another chapter tomorrow - keep your fingers crossed, everyone!

Ja Ne...

Amber