InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Captive Soul ❯ chapter 22 ( Chapter 22 )
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 04.03.2004 | Pages: 5 | Words: 5.5K | Visits: 722 | Status: Completed
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters.
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Chapter 22: Giving in.
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The blurry shadows danced along her bedroom wall.
She could not sleep.
Too much.
It was all too much.
With a quiet gasp of sorrow, Rin sat up in bed.
Glancing at the clock, she realized that time had stood still. The night did not want to pass.
It did not want to move so her pain could diminish.
It wanted to kill her.
Sluggishly, she raised up off her bed and stepped to her balcony door. Looking passed the planed glass, Rin surveyed the night.
The trees were swaying with the wind. The moon, which she thought had been full, only appeared to be a sliver of light. Clouds moved with speed, dimming the silver crescent's brilliance.
Her hand reached for the cold metal handle.
With a turn, she opened the windowed door and quietly stepped out onto the balcony.
The warm wind whipped through her hair.
Taking in a deep breath, she tried to catch the smells of twilight. She grasped the railing and peered over the edge to the almost hidden beauty down below.
Darkness hid almost every flower. But the fading light of the moon fell on some of the blossoms, making them glow with a soft luminance.
She walked to the end of the balcony then descended the steps.
Far away, beyond the hills, thunder rumbled.
The smooth stone path cooled her bare feet as she padded toward the middle of her floral sanctuary.
This place had healed her before. Maybe it would heal her now.
Even through the dark, Rin knew the way.
The wind played with her locks, asking to become part healing process.
She breathed in deeply, catching the heavenly smell of roses and rain.
It may come soon. But she did not care.
Too close to the bare necessity she craved, Rin fell into the meshy material.
Caught in its embrace, Rin curled in on herself and swung with the ever rising breeze.
Streaks of light flashed in the distance.
Rin looked up and beheld the silver crescent being shrouded by the thickness of the oncoming storm.
Rin sighed. Maybe lightning would strike.
No, that would be too easy. Life did not work that way.
When it decided to rain. It poured without mercy.
Alone.... she had always been alone.
Sure, she had family: Kagome, Sota, Momma, Daddy.
But never had anyone come so close to her heart, almost as if he were a part of her.
Never had she felt true love until now.
And wouldn't you know it. She loved someone who did not want her.
Gritting her teeth, Rin glared at the swirling, misty clouds.
She had been such a fool.
He only lived to serve;
all that affection,
the closeness,
the way he had held her,
all of it, nothing but skilled servitude.
She wouldn't be surprised if he even said he loved her.
It was all programmed from the start.
With another deep sigh, Rin breathed the anger away.
This mode of thinking was pointless.
She couldn't blame him.
He had been broken.
His present actions were more than likely lessons that had been beaten into him, a by-product from years of tortured slavery.
He had been trained how to entice women; how to satisfy them, how to...make them feel...pleasure.
And that training may have been..painful.
Self loathing balled up inside.
What had she done?
She had consented to his behavior, accepting the caresses, the affection, that... that.....look in his eyes.
With the belief that Sesshomaru's true self actually cared, she had permitted it all.
She had believed that he had feelings for her.
But that had not been the case.
No.
She had seen his true self tonight.
When he.......
When the coldness in his eyes pierced through the warmth of her heart.
Grief replaced the self hatred.
Oh yes, Sesshomaru was changing; breaking free, coming out of the fog of slavery.
That true self was resurfacing.
But that true self had no desire to be with her.
The trees were swaying heavily now.
She blinked back the wetness to watch the early summer storm sweep over the smothered light of the moon.
With determination, she taunted the swelling chaos above. "Rain! Come on! Rain on me! What are you waiting for?!"
She wanted it to pour, to drench her body and wash away everything; the pain, the misery.....the tears.
A flash of light cracked across the sky.
Thunder boomed overhead.
Rin smiled weakly. "That's it.....come on...make it all disappear."
She frowned and whispered to the light sprinkles falling from the angered heavens. "Drown me...please."
"You should not be out here."
Startled, Rin looked from the chaotic dark sky to the owner of the voice.
She sat up and crossed her arms. "What do you want?"
Silver hair lashed and fluttered about his shadowed form.
Darkness veiled his features. "I...I could not sense your presence in the house. I...searched."
Irritated, she snapped. "Well, your search is over. You found me. Anything else?"
The youkai moved closer. "I....you should not be out in this...weather."
Looking away, she grumbled. "That's my business."
By the sound of his voice, he now stood only a foot away. "You need to go in. You could get hurt out here."
She gave a harsh laugh. "What do you care?"
Large wet drops began to splatter on her face and nightgown.
The rush of rain signaled another spike of electric current and clap of thunder.
The downpour now soaked everything, making her clothes cling to her skin.
Cold, wet, brutal: It felt good.
"Rin."
She remained silent.
His words, very close, carried a firm tone. "Look at me."
She refused to acknowledge his request.
"Rin...I...do care."
Rin turned angrily to face the inu youkai who was now kneeling next to the hammock, water dripping from his silver bangs. "Will you stop it? Your just saying that to please me...to satisfy your master! Now I want you to leave me alone!"
Lightning flashed, showing his features which revealed nothing. "No."
Rin blinked at him through the wet rain. "I can make you leave. I can give you an order."
He shook his head once. "I will not obey you this time."
She stared at the dog demon in disbelief. "You have to. If you don't...."
The demon interrupted. "That is my business."
Looking away, she let out an exasperated breath. "Why do you have to make it so difficult?! Can't you see that I want to be left alone?! I want you to go away!"
Streaks of light now lit up the night, making the falling raindrops sparkle.
She gasped as two very strong arms picked her up: One under her knees and one bracing her back.
Rin struggled in his hold. "Sess! What are you....."
His steady gait ventured toward the house.
As she bucked and kicked, her temper rose. "That's it! I'll say it! I will give you an order and you will have to put me down! I am not kidding, Sess!"
He was now halfway to the back door and did not seem to be listening to a word she was saying.
Angrily, she stopped her struggles and glared at the dog demon who only looked straight ahead.
He was ignoring her.
She had had enough. "Put me down, now!"
He made no motion to comply with her order and continued in the direction of the house.
They neared the light of the back door and Rin could see a hint of his expression. He had a faint smile upon his lips.
A new emotion emerged as his smile fell and he grimaced...fear.
Frantically, she bucked harder. "Sess! Put me down now! Please!"
Rin froze as his voice rasped out. "It...is okay...Rin. It will not..... let me harm you. I have a certain amount.... of time.... left. I will not be..... punished... until I set you down. For now....it only warns."
Confused, Rin reached up and pushed back a lock of his hair.
She jerked her hand back when one of her fingers grazed the collar around his throat. It felt cold and slimy. It had also moved under her touch.
He had now made it to the back door of the kitchen which had been left wide open.
Sesshomaru entered the house, but did not put her down.
In the mellow light of the room, she looked up at him.
His features were somewhat pained as he dripped his way across the kitchen and to the door which led to the hallway. After leaving the kitchen, he stumbled once while hurrying down the hallway.
Her fear evolved into rising panic. "Sess? Can I make it stop?"
As he made one step up the stairs, he barely shook his head once. "No...you can not."
Halfway up the stairs, he fell to one knee but righted himself quickly.
Reaching the door to his room, Sesshomaru stopped.
He leaned his back against the wall and clenched his eyes shut.
Labored breaths escaped with sporadic, hesitant, gasps.
It sounded as if his breathing was slowly being cut off.
Shaking, Rin could not stop her heart from pounding. "Sess?"
A few seconds passed before he opened his eyes again.
He glanced at the door to his room and then down at her.
Through the pain in his golden depths, she could see an unspoken message.
She shook her head. "No, Sess!"
He grimaced once again, this time, almost contorting in pain.
Before she knew it, Sesshomaru had set her down. In less than a split second he had entered his room and shut the door. The lock clicked.
Immediately, Rin jumped up and reached for the door knob; it wouldn't budge.
As she had thought, he had locked her out.
With her panic rising beyond anything she had ever known, Rin pounded on the wooden surface. "Sess! Open this door! Sess! Let me in! Sesshomaru!.....Open...This...Door!"
She stopped and listened.
Nothing. Silence.
As if a nightmare had come to real life, all sounds of reality magnified at once: Thunder boomed outside and the rain thrashed the roof. Wind whistled through the window in her bedroom. Branches of the trees creaked in the rising gale.
Terrified, her fists connected to the door as she pounded once more. "Sesshomaru...Please...let me in......."
All of her energy seem to vanish and she laid her forehead against the cool, smooth wood. With exhaustion, she smacked the door once more and pleaded as her tears began to fall. "Please...Please...let me in, Sesshomaru."
Rin slumped to the floor, the faintest of words breathed passed her lips. "I...love...you."
Suddenly, she remembered something. Rin raised her head....the balcony door!
Jumping up, she ran to her room and to the door leading to the balcony.
Stepping out , she stumbled as a gust of wind and rain pushed her toward the brick wall.
Regaining her balance, Rin hurried to Sessomaru's balcony door.
Large drops of water splashed all around as her bare feet padded on the wet wood.
She neared the windowed door and cupped her hands to look in.
It was too dark to see. The only thing she could make out was the shadow of the bed and dresser.
Determined, Rin reached for the handle.
She thanked God and everything Holy when the handle turned.
It had not been locked.
The door opened and she stepped into the dark room.
A flash of light lit up the surroundings for only a second.
In that second, silver and white on the floor, half hidden by the bed, caught her attention.
Cautiously, she eased around, her eyes locked on the faint shade of white.
"Sess?"
Water dripped from her hair and clothes onto the carpet.
Sesshomaru's shadowed form came into view, hidden by the bed and shrouded by darkness.
He appeared to be laying on his left side.
His silver hair splayed all around, most of it, covering his face.
As she neared him, the carpet beneath her bare feet squished between her toes.
She looked down but could not discern why the floor was so wet.
Kneeling next to him, she reached out to touch his face. "Sess?"
Lightly, the tips of her fingers touched his cheek.
It was cool.
Grasping his shoulder, she gave a little shake. "Sess?"
The demon below her gave no outward sign of acknowledgement.
Quickly, she rose and reached over to switch on the light.
She gasped.
He lay there, on his side, silverly white drapped over his body.
She followed the line of silver outward till the silvery white strands mingled with dark scarlet.
Blood?
Shocked, her eyes fell to her toes.
They were covered with crimson.
She had been stepping in Sesshomaru's own blood.
Immediately, she dropped to her knees at his side. Carefully, she reached out and moved the silver strands which hid his face and neck.
His eyes were closed and the lines of his face were soft. Small drops of blood dotted his lips but it could not have been enough to soak the carpet.
He was not breathing.
Trying to control the tremors, Rin studied the black metal collar around his neck. It looked the same.
Taking a closer look, she noticed blood on his skin, underneath the collar.
More of the dark red had pooled under his neck and soaked his white shirt at the shoulder.
Pushing two fingers in between the black metal and his skin, she pulled them out and stared in horror. Blackish red clots oozed down her palm.
For a second, she froze in fear. His restraint had severed into the skin on his neck.
Gingerly, she pushed on his shoulders, moving him to lay on his back.
She put an ear to his chest and listened.
Several minutes passed....her vision blurred. She could not hear his heart beating.
Grief tore its way into her as she lay on him and let the tears fall, creating little wet spots on the front of his shirt. She sobbed with small quiet gasps. "No...no...no..."
Just before hope vanished, a faint thump sounded deep within his chest.
Rin stilled and listened again.
Another glorious heartbeat reached her ears.
Looking up, she moved her hand and touched his face. "Sess?"
She waited.
Soon, he turned his nose toward her hand in a small gesture. But his eyes did not open.
"Sess?"
He swallowed once and his lips parted.
His voice, rough and somewhat girguled, spoke hesitantly. "I...cannot give you... a bond...what you want...what I want...I cannot....make you my life mate.... it will not let me...mark you...I cannot make you mine...Forgive me...what I said...I did not know...that your heart...needed me..."
As his words died to inaudible whispers then stopped altogether, Rin stared in astonishment.
Bond?
His?
He wanted....to make....her...his mate?
Sango's words echoed in her mind. "'Most inu youkai mate for life, Rin. You don't see it..do you? If I didn't know better, I would say he wanted to make you his mate.'"
Rin blinked...his life mate?
He wanted...to mark her?
To make her...his...for life?
Trembling, she moved over him until her nose almost touched his. As her lip quivered, Rin smoothed her hand over his cheek; caressing the warming skin, tracing the red lines, and lightly pushing aside stray strands of silver.
One tear splashed on one scarlet line.
With a small sniffle, she whispered. "I love you, Sesshomaru. Please be alright."
Another faint whisper escaped as she leaned closer and her lips brushed the soft warmth of his. "I love you."
Laying her cheek on his chest, Rin closed her eyes, comforted by the now, steady beat of his heart.
Time passed and the rain outside tapered away, diminishing to occasional drops, falling from the eaves.
Everything became quiet.
Rin heard the clock in the kitchen chime once.
Then, Sesshomaru breathed in deeply and one hand lightly touched her back.
Relieved, she looked over to see amber eyes slowly open and blink a few times.
They focused then moved to rest their gaze on her.
They blinked once.
Then, she felt it, moving steadily with slow, methodical force. It flowed endlessly, completed everything, and replenished the barren shadows. It crossed bridges, smoothed all jagged borders, and nourished with an overflow of purity and perpetual strength.
She smiled.
He raised an eyebrow with a small smile of his own.
But then, she frowned. "Are you okay?"
He looked away and grimaced when he tried to turn his head. "Yes, I will be."
Raising up on her elbows, she looked down at him. "Can you get up?"
His hand moved to his throat and he gave it a light rub above the metal restaint. His features strained with the motion. "Yes, I can get up."
He lowered his hand and looked at her. "If you will allow me to, that is."
With a strange smile he scanned over her nightgown then returned his amber gaze to her face. "You will have to get off of me first...And...you may want to go...change."
Rin peered down at her cream colored nightgown, wet and plastered to her skin.
She blushed furiously. "Eeeek!"
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Rins cheeks flushed. She jumped up and ran out the door.
Sitting up, he surveyed the damage.
Blood drenched the carpet under him and soaked through his clothes. He briefly wandered at the blood loss. Never had he lost so much. The collar had broken through his skin this time.
But his mind had stayed in tact. He had not escaped into that other place. No, he had chosen to stay. When he had heard Rin....
Smiling, he rose up shakily.
For a moment he stood tall and rigid.
He felt different...something had changed. Grabbing a pair of sweat pants from the drawer, he headed for the bathroom.
After a quick bath, he stepped out into the hall.
Rin's scent, clean and fresh, lingered close by.
While toweling his hair, he walked to Rin's open bedroom door. She sat on her bed, now wearing a pink night dress and brushing her hair.
She looked up when he knocked lightly. "Can I come in?"
With a soft smile, she nodded. "Yes."
As he walked to her bed, she patted the space next to her.
He sat down and continued drying his hair with the towel.
"Sess?"
He glanced at her. "Mmmm?"
While holding up the brush in front of her she asked. "May I?"
Shrugging his shoulders, he turned his back to her.
He sat cross legged while she brushed his hair.
Her voice carried a soft saddness. "At least your hair dries fast. Sometimes mine takes forever to dry.... Sesshomaru?"
He bowed his head and closed his eyes, calmed by the smooth brush strokes. "Yes?"
"Do you want me to be...your mate?"
He sighed heavily. "And what if I do?"
"Then we have some things to talk about."
Small arms wrapped around him and her chin settled on his shoulder. "I need to tell you something important."
Grasping her small hand, he nodded once. "I am listening."
Those arms left him. The bed dipped as Rin crawled around.
He opened his eyes to see her pinkened features looking up to him. The most beautiful light he had ever seen glistened in the clearest of brown.
She smiled. "Sesshomaru, I love you."
In wonder, he tilted his head and smiled.
And in that soft wonder, he reached over and cupped her cheek in his palm.
She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch. One tear slid over his fingers.
"Rin."
Eyes, overflowing and shimmering with emotion, opened and looked up.
With a firmness, he expressed what lay in his heart. "I want you to be my life mate."
Rin's smile softened with tenderness. "I would like that." < p>
He lowered his hand and looked away. "Rin, there is a problem. To make you my life mate, I must mark you...I must pierce your skin with my fang. The curse I am under will not let me purposely harm you. I cannot make you my mate, Rin."
He looked back when she patted his arm. "It does not matter. I love you. You can marry me. By law, we can be married."
He shook his head. "It is not that simple. That is man's law. To me, I would not be bonded to you."
She frowned. "You do not think you will be set free." It was more of a statement than a question.
Sesshoumaru sighed lightly. "It is uncertain whether the curse can be removed. The miko who placed it on me.... she had great power over demons....she also warned...a price had to be paid for my freedom. If I remain your servant, I will never be able to make you my life mate. There would be only one way we could become mates...."
Rin's brow furrowed. "How?"
"If the curse cannot be lifted, the only way for us to become mates would be if you sold me to someone else and that person let me live with you....I could mark you then."
Rin's frown deepened. "No. I will not sell you."
But then her features lightened with determination. "It will be alright. I have faith in Kagome. And you will be free. I promise. Even if I have to go to the ends of the earth and back again, I will find a way to remove your curse."
Rin grasped his hand and pulled him back to lay beside her on the bed.
Yawning deeply, she closed her eyes and snuggled up against him. "It is late. We need to get some sleep."
Sliding one arm around her small form, he held her close and placed one small kiss on her temple. Soon, he joined her in a peaceful slumber.
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Rin stirred. It was morning. Late morning.
He had awakened to Rin's warmth inside his arms.
Still asleep, she moved her head so her nose was no longer buried close to his chest. Her mouth opened slightly with a small half waking breath.
His heart pounded lightly and he licked his lips.
He swallowed. How sweet would she taste?
Hesitantly, he drew closer. She smelled so good.
Just as his mouth watered to savor her fair skin and full lips, the phone rang.
Rin sat up with half lidded eyes and looked around groggily. "What?"
The phone rang again and she shook her head and reached for the offending, interrupting contraption.
He growled with irritation.
The world was not on his side.
Rin picked up the receiver. "Hello?"
Kagome's voice resonated clearly on the other end. "Hey Rin. You said you would call. You sound sleepy. Did I wake you?"While rubbing her eye with the back of her hand, Rin replied. "Yea, you kinda did."
"Good grief, Rin. It's nearly lunch time. Were you going to sleep all day?"
Rin yawned slightly. "I stayed up late."
"Anyway, you said you were going to call me this morning and tell me what you decided about the banquet. Are you going with Naraku?"
At the mention of the hanyou, Sesshomaru felt his demon blood heat up. He growled again.
"No, Kagome. I told Naraku yesterday that I was not going with him."
"Really?...How did he take it?"
Rin sighed. "I don't think he took it very well. He seemed a little miffed. When Kouga showed up, he left."
Kagome's voice brightened. "Kouga? I haven't seen him in ages. Maybe you should have asked him if he wanted to go. Though, come to think of it, he may show up anyway."
Rin leaned back some. "No, the thought of asking Kouga didn't cross my mind. In fact, I already have someone in mind to go with me."
"Well, if you don't ask Kouga, I might, if I can catch him at home that is. He is always in such a hurry. Who are you going to ask?"
Rin cleared her throat then turned and looked at him. "I was thinking of asking my housemate if he would escort me."
Kagome's voice rose a pitch higher. "Sesshomaru?"
With a faint smile, she tilted her head. "Yea, I am hoping that he will accept my invitation."
"Does he have anything to wear?"
Rin flushed when her gaze lingered. "I....think he does. It will be a little dramatic but I think it will do."
His patience wore thin as Rin continued to banter with her sister.
He grinned and pulled back the covers.
With his sights locked on his future mate, he began to slowly crawl towards her.
Rin's eyes widened and she scooted backwards a little.
"Rin...are you listening to me? I was asking if you needed me to come pick you and Sesshomaru up or not."
Rin stuttered. "Uh...no..I think I will...drive there myself. It will be in the same place as last year.....won't it?"
"Yea, I will be waiting for you at the entrance at seven p.m.. Momma sent me the tickets. You will need to get them from me or they might not let you in."
Turning away, Rin replied to her sister. "Uh....yea....Ok.."
He crawled closer and nuzzled his nose in her hair.
"Are you okay?..You sound a little flustered."
Rin shrugged her left shoulder tight when he hit a ticklish spot with his nose. "Sure...I'm okay....just need to get some coffee into my system."
"Kagome laughed. "If I didn't know better I would think something or someone else might be distracting you."
Rising up off the bed, Rin turned with a smile and waved her index finger back and forth at him. "I don't know what you are talking about, Kagome."
Kagome's mirth did not lessen. "Uh huh...sure. Well, anyway, Rin, I have got to go. I need to go get my hair fixed for tonight. See you at seven?"
Rin neared the bedside table. "Sure thing, Kagome. Bye."
"Bye, Rin."
After she hung up the phone, Rin put both hands on her hips and gave him a playful smirk. "You like to mess, don't you?"
He smirked as well, but remained motionless by the edge of the bed. "Mess? Is that a human term?"
She raised an eyebrow. "You could say that it is slang for picking on or playing with someone."
He blinked. "Then, perhaps, yes, I do like to....mess...with you."
Shaking her head, she gestured for him to move over. He did. She sat next to him and smiled. "I want to ask you something."
"Yes?"
"There is this charity banquet tonight. I want to know if you would like to go with me." Her tone hurried. "There will be a lot of people there. If you don't want to go, it's okay."
She then peered at him through her lashes and her voice slowed and softened..."But I really would like it if you would accept my invitation."
He nodded. "I accept. It would be an honor to escort you to this...banquet."
She let out a breath. "Great!"
Leaning over, she gave him a peck on the cheek.
In a blink, he snatched his little minx and pinned her to the bed.
A distinct half growl, half grunt escaped his throat.
Rin blinked up at him with her mouth slightly open.
Leaning down, he sniffed around her exposed throat and up to her ear.
As he licked the smooth, heated skin on her neck, Rin's pulse quickened.
Nudging his nose in her hair, he let out a faint whimper.
Her scent changed; and he breathed in deeply, catching the incredibly arousing essence of purity mixed with intense desire.
With one slow, hot stroke, he ran his tongue over the rim of her ear, causing the little nymph below him to take in a quick breath.
Raising up, he gazed in wonder and marveled at the depth of emotion in every beautiful line of her soft features.
Delicately, he pushed back a lock of chestnut hair and traced the curve of her face from temple to cheek, stopping just below the chin.
With a gentleness he did not know he had, he traced the line of her full, pink, bottom lip with the pad of his thumb. "Do you need me, Rin?"
The angel below him smiled with radiant innocence. Small hands slipped into his hair as she pulled him down to her.
The world disappeared.
Time stopped.
A secret emotion moved deep within; A sensation like he had never known.
Power he could not fathom held his life in its strong embrace. It kindled strange feelings: esctasy, passion, devotion, and freedom.
His heart began to beat in a slow, heavy rhythm.
A whisper breathed next to his ear. "Forever."
Soft, warm lips lightly brushed against his.
Closing his eyes, he cupped the angel's face with one hand and deepened the kiss.
For the first time....he tasted...the sweetness...of Rin.
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Author' s note: Yes, this chapter had to happen. Mainly because Rin needed to see what Sesshomaru would go through for her. Even disobeying commands to the extent of near death. All should have noticed that he did not open the door when she told him to as well. Several times. In Rin's panic, she did not realize that she was actually giving him commands. (oops). But this chapter ended okay. I hope all who read were thoroughly entertained. And you will have to see next chap how far Sess and Rin really got. Well they can't get too far now can they. He he. Comments are welcome. next chap will be about a week away and will be the banquet and yes Inu finally shows up!!!! yea!!! eep...Please review! ^_^