InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Come Home Puppy ❯ Figuring It Out ( Chapter 8 )

Figuring It Out
Sesshoumaru remained at a loss for what to do with Inuyasha. He was now refusing to see the kit and the cat. He still would not eat, and he refuses to come out of his suites for anything. Sesshoumaru was even missing Inuyasha's irritating demands of seeing the ningen or at least being able to go outside for an hour or so. He knows that if he gives into the pup, however, Inuyasha would soon be running all over him. Yet again, he knows that if something doesn't give soon, Inuyasha is going to make himself ill or even kill himself at this rate. It has been a week and a half since he has eaten anything. Sesshoumaru is almost worried that he would start another protest by refusing the fluids that they have thus far managed to get him to ingest. The TaiYoukai let out an audible sigh.
"Lord Sesshoumaru?"
"What is it now, Jaken?"
"I think I may know what is wrong with the half-breed."
"Do not refer to him by such an adjective, Jaken. What do you believe is wrong with my otouto and why have you not spoken sooner?"
"I thought you would have figured it out by now."
"You will speed up your explaination or I will slice you in half and this time I might not have the care to revive you." The imp squeaked and backed away from the testy, regal demon before once again addressing the Lord of the Western Lands.
"He feels trapped m'lord."
"What?" was the elegant reply.
"I understand that you want to protect him and he probably understands that too, but you have to look at things from his perspective as well. How many decisions has he been able to make without having to consult you and then to have you shoot down most of them. Most times I do not care for your younger brother, m'lord, but even I can see that he is most likely comparing these lack of freedoms as being similar or the same as Naraku's imprisonment of him. He isn't allowed to leave the palace, he cannot go anywhere within the palace without an escort and you have guards posted at the entrance to his rooms at all times. Not only would these conditions bother anyone, including you, your constant rejection of his right to see those ningens is not helping matters. Wait until I finish," the imp held up his hand, speaking out of character to his lord. "In essence, it is their fault that he was captured by Naraku and he must see it that way. He conceded on the miko, but he still needs to find closure with ones who have caused him pain. The only way for him to do this, is to confront them for himself or he will never truly heal from Naraku's torture as he will have surely pressed that sore spot if he did indeed organize the plan you spoke of."
"How is it that you know of this and this Sesshoumaru does not, Jaken?" the TaiYoukai demanded with a growl. He was angry and upset with himself as well as the imp that had dared to tell him to be quiet whilst he spoke. The imp was not above him.
"The pup wears his heart on his sleeve, you only have to look at it to know."
"I cannot let him see those ningen, Jaken. They have already hurt him greatly and-"
"You do not have to allow Inuyasha to see them alone m'lord. You may have guards posted about or you could chaperone the confrontation yourself. There is more about him that you need to acknowledge."
"Really? and what would that be?" he growled out, now becoming irate. How would this lowly vassal that does not consider his otouto appropriate company know more about him than he himself knows.
"You need to acknowledge him," was the simple response. It caught the stoic demon off-guard.
"Explain," Sesshoumaru commanded having tightened his control over his emotions.
"You refuse to praise him for his successes, basically ignoring him. The only way he can get your attention is to misbehave. The negative attention is breaking him, however, and the punishment that you believe was appropriate would have been had it been a normal child. Inuyasha has just recovered from torture that was physical and mental. Whether you believe it or not, you reinforced the physical punishment and it is likely that he believes that his situation now is no better than that which he escaped."
"This Sesshoumaru is not torturing his baby brother, Jaken," the regal demon looked ready to kill.
"I did not say that you were m'lord, but to Inuyasha's abused mind you are. Now that he is physically better, you have neglected to take care of him mentally. You allowed the positive attention from when he was sick to wan and disappear as you threw yourself back into your work. From there you only paid attention when there was a complaint about his behavior and it was left to you to castigate him during meals and even then you were distracted. Inuyasha will be sensitive to everyone's emotions, even the ones you think that your hiding because that is what kept him alive so long. Even Rin and Shippou could see that Inuyasha was trying to tell you, but you have to open your eyes and see Sesshoumaru or it could be that you will lose him."
The little green imp squeaked and ran out the door when a poison whip snapped near his head. Sesshoumaru sat in his back and thought about what his vassal had said. It was such a strange thing for Jaken to stand up so defensively for someone that the regal demon always thought he had hated with a passion. His thoughts continued to drift over the words and after a while images began to match with words as he recalled all of his interactions with his otouto. How could he have been so dense?

Shippou and Kirara lay beside Inuyasha watching over him as he slept. He wouldn't come to see them anymore, so they had made the decision to come and visit him. They were dismayed by what they saw, especially Shippou. Inuyasha had withered away to skin and bones since he had stopped eating, he had shadows under his eyes since his nightmares had come back in double, though now they were being confused with the life he led here, and even his eyes had lost what life they had regained. Shippou took the time to curl up next to Inuyasha's chest, Kirara on the other side of him, and cried as he knows it to be a very real possibility that he will lose his surrogate father and that there would be no bringing him back this time.
Shippou was also angry because every time he or Rin tried to point Sesshoumaru's attention towards Inuyasha's downward spiral, he had brushed it and them off. He was 'busy' or 'needed to catch up on this paperwork because he had been tending to Inuyasha' and it was his fault that his papa was now like this. It also happened that he would be the only person that could bring his papa back. Kirara mewled, telling Shippou that someone was coming to Inuyasha's rooms.

Sesshoumaru couldn't stand it anymore, he was going to see Inuyasha. He hadn't been by to see the pup in the past two days and even that memory caused him to feel a tight pulling in his chest that signified his guilt. What kind of aniki was he if he couldn't even see his own brother when he needed him most. That alone could have made Inuyasha feel better when this had first began, instead he had ignored him except to chastise him and punish him, but never stopped by just to see how he was feeling or if there was something he needed to talk about. He had hated it as a pup when his father seemed to ignore him, and Inuyasha in his state was bound to feel it a hundred times over to have his only family do the same to him.
Sesshoumaru stopped as he entered the pup's bedroom to stare at the sad scene before him, in another instance he would have found this cute and hopefully a premonition of the future he and Inuyasha would have together. Shippou's head suddenly popped up, pulling Sesshoumaru from his wistful reverie.
"Whattya doin' here, Sesshoumaru?" the little kit whispered furitively. It was cute and courageous how the kit was standing up to the very demon that usually had him hiding in the miko's skirt, and for the inu-hanyou that lay deeply sleeping on the bed beside him.
"This Sesshoumaru merely wished to see his otouto."
"Now, you want to see him. He has to get sick before you want to talk to him?"
"That was not my intention, kit. This Sesshoumaru knows he has not been there for Inuyasha have."
"Damn right, you haven't! He was wondering when you would tire of being his aniki again and have him e. from here."
"This Sesshoumaru would not have sent him from the Western Palace. It is his home as much as mine."
"Liar. If that was true, why was he left on his own when his mom died? Where were you when he was fighting humans and demons because they didn't like because he was hanyou? I don't know why he looks up to you, he's already better than you'll ever be. Your mean, self..self..., only care about yourself, and the only thing that matters to you is getting your father's sword from him."
"Shippou, shhhhh. My head hurts." Inuyasha grumbled hoarsely, throat unused to talking so much within the past four days. He rolled over onto his front and buried his head under the moutain of pillows as though trying to run from his headache before falling back into his deep sleep. Shippou petted Inuyasha's hair and smiled when he received sigh before the half-demon started purring. Sesshoumaru could feel guilt and jealousy fighting for the dominant position within his chest. Guilt won out.
"It's your fault he's like this. He told me that he thought you would be the one that would accept him as he was, but you didn't. He also told me that he only wanted to succeed so you would notice him, but you didn't. After that, he stopped talking to me. It's all your fault that he won't talk to me anymore. He won't even tell stories at bedtime, or pet me when I have a nightmare. You took my papa away. I hate you!" Shippou began to cry again. He settled himself against Inuyasha's form, Kirara closing in from the other side while hissing menacingly at Sesshoumaru before licking the kit until he had exhausted himself and fell asleep. Sesshoumaru walked from the room with his mind in a mess of guilt, anger, and a desperation that surpassed that of finding Inuyasha before Naraku could bring his plans to fruition. He had no one to blame in this but himself and this time he knows exactly what he needs to do to fix it. Starting with getting Inuyasha to trust him again so that he will become healthy again.

Sango was becoming impatient with waiting for Inuyasha to visit them and every time she asked about him to one of the guards or servants she just got a blank look or a glare. She wanted, no needed to talk to Inuyasha. She needs to tell him that she's sorry and though that will not make up for what she did, she hopes it will be a start to rebuilding the friendship they once had before she allowed herself to let it fall into ruins with a few simple words. She looked up as the door opened to her room. They had just picked up the lunch tray and Miroku had already had his visit and smack today, so she doesn't know who would be visiting at this time. She couldn't hold back her surprised gasp when Sesshoumaru himself entered the room. If she couldn't get Inuyasha, his older brother was the next best thing.
"I want to speak with Inuyasha. I don't care what he says, I want to speak with him, even if he doesn't forgive."
"Inuyasha hasn't been well lately and recently it has gotten worse. You will be able to see him if you wish, but it will only be under the supervision of your personal guards. Do not upset him." That was all that was said before the regal demon exited the room just as swiftly and suddenly as he had come. Sango gave a triumphant smile, she had worn him down. She didn't have a clue of what she was in for when she saw Inuyasha next.