InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Dancing with Scissors ❯ Sesshoumaru's Bad Day, Improved ( Chapter 9 )

Kagome dumped the last bucket of dirty water into the sink and watched it whirl down the drain, her heart heavy with melancholy. This apartment had been home, her oasis the past six years, and, while she was excited about her new living situation and thrilled that moving was over, vacating it was proving difficult to accept.

 

For the past week and a half, she had been busier than ever before, forcing her to push down her sadness at leaving the place behind, but now the job was done, and she allowed herself to simply feel blue. The hard work paid off though; there was a real possibility she may get to actually sleep more than four hours that night.

 

She had finished painting the Taisho's guest house, brought Kikyou and Inuyasha's possessions to the storage unit, and packed up and moved her and Rin's belongings. Rin had started her preschool summer camp that week, so Kagome even had time to get the majority of the unpacking done as well. That morning, with the help of Bank and Jak and their truck, the last of the furniture-their beds and dressers, table, bookcases, and sofa-had been moved, and she and Rin would spend their first night sleeping under the new roof. She had yet to get her loom, but that could wait until the weekend.

 

In the time she had spent painting and unpacking at the guest house, she had seen neither Sesshoumaru nor Mr. Taisho. She knew they both were busy people, but had hoped Rin could break the ice with Mr. Taisho before they moved in. Mrs. Taisho was around somewhat more frequently, though she also was gone a lot. Kagome planned to put her foot down about having help with Rin; she needed to get back to work and would start band practice soon, not to mention finding time to run and work out.

 

She had met the housekeeper, Anita, and, once Kagome reassured her that she planned on cleaning the guest house and washing her and Rin's clothes herself, they instantly liked each other, even working out a laundry schedule to more easily share the use of the washer and dryer. The dog had accompanied her once the painting was finished and seemed overjoyed to have a huge yard in which to stretch his legs and new squirrels to terrorize.

 

It was all going fairly smoothly, more than she had dared to hope. She glanced around the clean, empty rooms and, bucket and mop in hand, left the apartment for the last time, trying not to cry. Sesshoumaru would be there any minute.

 

XxXxX

 

Sesshoumaru parked in front of Kagome's apartment, breathing a sigh of relief at getting out of the office for an hour. Kagome had asked him to go with her to pick up Rin from her preschool, so he could see where it was located and meet the teachers, since he would be taking some responsibility for transportation to and from school. This was the only day he had any free time in the afternoon, but as it turned out, the break was entirely welcome, even if he had to spend it with an obnoxious, foul-mouthed woman.

 

His morning had been one of frustration. His secretary was on vacation all week, and the hopelessly incompetent replacement sent by the temp agency had left crying after he had berated her for putting a client on hold and forgetting about him, despite the fact that the man's name led the list of important callers who were to be put through immediately. His corporate counsel later told him the workplace harassment lawsuit brought by a gold-digging former employee didn't settle after days of mediation. Then after lunch, a small fire on a lower floor necessitated the evacuation of the building, costing him an hour in which he had planned to return emails.

 

To top it off, Kagura had stopped by, demanding to know why he hadn't returned her calls to make a date for the dinner she felt she was owed. He feared he would have to physically remove her from the building, but knew she would probably take it as a sign of encouragement. At least it was Thursday, the day the new Scarlet Letter'd would appear among the pages of The Missing Link, and he had an enjoyable read to anticipate.

 

He walked to the side of the building and saw Kagome sitting on the step, looking forlorn.

 

"Hi," she greeted him, brightening a little. "I'm really gonna miss this place and the neighborhood. Home, sweet home and all that. But...time to move along. Ready?"

 

His response was a patiently raised eyebrow, as she dug keys from a yellow back pack.

 

"It's the dark blue minivan parked a few doors down."

 

"Minivan?" he said with distaste. He hadn't been in anything other than luxury and performance automobiles in years. "I'll drive."

 

"You can't. You don't have a booster seat in your car, and Rin needs one."

 

"Take the one in your car and put it in mine," he said reasonably.

 

"Can't. It's integrated...built into the seat. Why the reluctance?" She squinted at him, then smiled knowingly. "Never ridden in a minivan before, have you?"

 

He said nothing, but his slight sneer bespoke annoyance.

 

"A virgin," she said with delight, taking his arm and leading him toward the sidewalk. "And I get to be your first. Don't worry; I'll be gentle. I promise," she whispered flirtatiously. "And anything you may have heard about men who are exposed to the inside of a minivan experiencing irreversible testicular shrinkage is a myth. Or at least an exaggeration."

 

He sighed wearily; the day was not improving.

 

As they walked down the street he saw a blue van, the whole back end plastered with bumper stickers, making it look like a crazy quilt of band names, political slogans, and social commentary. F The President, Choice NOW!, The Misfits, Why Choose the Lesser Evil-Vote Cthulhu, I Don't Mind Straight People, As Long As They Act Gay In Public, Metallica, Nice Marmot—LebowskiFest .com, I Support Public Radio were a few he read as they approached. He always believed bumper stickers to be a rather vulgar and common display, usually indicating poor taste and lack of refinement, and couldn't imagine he had to ride in the vehicle in front of him. Then he saw If You're Going To Ride My Ass, At Least Pull My Hair And Give Me A Reach Around and balked. There is no way in Hell I am getting any closer to that automobile, he almost said aloud.

 

"What?" Kagome asked, noticing he stopped. "Ohquitbeingsuckafuckingbaby. You're like a teenager who doesn't want to be seen in public with his parents. I 've got a canvas grocery bag inside if you want to put it over your head. Or I can drop you off a few blocks away, and you can pretend we didn't come together."

 

"Kagome," he said, suddenly willing himself back at work, "you are incredibly irritating."

 

"I try," she answered, unlocking the doors with a remote; the cheery indicator `beep' seemed to mock his extreme discomfort.

 

When she started the ignition, loud accordion music assaulted him. Kagome quickly turned it down to a tolerable level. "Sorry," she apologized, "I've been so busy lately...sleep is the first casualty, and blasting Zydeco—this is Beau Jocque—has been quite helpful in keeping me awake until I can consume sufficient caffeine.

 

"I'm really not a huge fan of this particular mode of transportation," she continued as she drove toward Rin's school. "It's slow and loud, but it's just so damn practical. My dog doesn't fit very well in anything else, and I used to do art shows. I could load up all my shit in here, set up my tent, then sleep in the back. Saw a lot of action back there too. You wouldn't think the art show circuit would be such a meat market. Sorry...is that too much information?" she asked upon seeing his horrified expression.

 

He merely glowered at her, wishing it had the same effect on her as it did on everyone else, namely cringing in dread. Unfortunately for his current situation, trapped in a minivan with her, she was undeterred.

 

"I really should mention something."

 

He closed his eyes, wondering if the woman ever stopped talking.

 

"Rin has a best friend named Shippou. Super cute and sweet, but he's a little shit. A born trickster, if I've ever met one." A car suddenly pulled out in front of them, causing Kagome to slam on the brakes. She laid on the horn and yelled, "ASSHOLE! Learn how to drive! Some people...anyway...he and Inuyasha had a special relationship. Shippou decided on their first meeting, his role in life was to tease Inuyasha. It started out innocently enough—Shippou called him Butt-Head or something. A normal adult would have just ignored him or taken him aside and told him that was an unacceptable way to speak to anyone, and he would have lost interest quickly, but, as we know, Inuyasha was far from normal. He completely overreacted, giving Shippou a reason to continue. Name calling turned to accusations of stinkiness and stupidity, degenerating to practical jokes. In reality they were really fond of each other. Shippou worships the ground I walk on, by the way. But the reason I am bringing it up...Shippou may try to spark a similar relationship with you. If he does anything particularly insulting or whatever, just try not to kill him."

 

Sesshoumaru shook his head slowly. "My mother has expressed interest in Rin attending Fairfield Academy this fall,” he said, changing the subject. “Has she mentioned anything to you?”

 

"No, she hasn't, but you may as well tell her No Fucking Way. Kikyou did tons of research finding a preschool program and decided Haven Montessori was the best fit, and I plan to honor her wishes. She and Inuyasha would shit at the thought of their kid going to that white bread institution of entitlement and conformity."

 

"Kagome, you have no idea what you're talking about. Inuyasha and I both attended a few years at Fairfield Elementary. It is an excellent school," he said icily.

 

"Yeah, and Inuyasha got kicked out for behavior problems," she snapped back. "Rin's doing just fine where she's at; I have no reason to switch schools. "She looked at him curiously. "You said you were there a few years. Did you get kicked out too?" she teased.

 

"No," he replied, his patience nearing its end. "I was sent to Cushing Hall."

 

"Where's that? I don't recognize the name."

 

"Connecticut. It's a boarding school."

 

"Really? How old were you when you went?"

 

"Ten."

 

"Ten? That seems so young to be away from home."

 

He was taken aback by the concern in her voice. "I came back for holidays and summers."

 

"Did you come back here for high school?"

 

"No, I went to Flint River School, an all-boys preparatory academy in Massachusetts."

 

Kagome was silent as she digested this information. "So were you around when Inuyasha got expelled and threatened with military school and ran away from home?"

 

"No, sadly I missed that dramatic misadventure," he said cynically. "I was a freshman at Harvard that year. But even when I visited, things were never easy."

 

"I can imagine. Inuyasha didn't like to talk about growing up, but he did confide that he was a problem child and your parents had no idea how to deal with handle him."

 

They turned into a quiet, tree-lined drive that led to a small parking lot next to an attractive two-story house. "This is it." She parked, and they got out. "They're probably in the back where the playground is. Rin really is thriving here. It's a great school, and the teachers are wonderful. She said yesterday she wished she could go to school all summer."

 

"What do they do here in the summer?"

 

"Montessori classroom work until lunch, then fun stuff, like science projects and water play, in the afternoon."

 

An explanation of Montessori classroom work would have to wait; Rin, sitting atop the jungle gym with a red-headed boy, saw them approach and screamed, "Uncle Sesshoumaru!" She jumped down from the jungle gym, ran to Sesshoumaru, and threw herself at him.

 

He easily grabbed the petite, raven-haired ball of energy hurtling at him, tossing her in the air and catching her, their faces inches apart. Rin was in heaven; the electric fear of being airborne followed by strong arms about her was a favorite combination of excitement and security. She kissed him quickly, inexpertly on his cheek, giggling all the while. Sesshoumaru was bemused at the pure joy sparkling in the child's eyes. No one had ever given him such a reception, such an enthusiastic, unguarded greeting. He was a powerful man, far more used to seeing respect, if not outright trepidation, upon entering a room, and the girl's innocent exuberance made him feel quite like someone else.

 

“Hello, Rin,” he said with affection.

 

She smiled wide, the void of her missing tooth possessing a life of its own. “Come meet my friends! And my teachers!”

 

He put her down, and she took his hand and pulled him toward the playground, which was abuzz with two dozen cavorting children. Rin glanced over her shoulder at Kagome, who looked like she had just been handed a basket of kittens and puppies, and sternly mouthed the words, “No Crying,” at her.

 

XxXxX

 

Kagome had just finished putting dinner plates in the shiny, new dishwasher, when Rin asked if they could go visit her grandparents and uncle.

 

“Honey, I don't want to wear out our welcome too quickly. We will figure out a rhythm together, but I don't want to make a habit of dropping in unannounced.” Rin looked disappointed, and Kagome felt horrible. “Okay…I have something I need to talk to them about anyway.”

 

They walked around the huge Taisho mansion and knocked on the front door. Mrs. Taisho opened it and declared warmly, “Rin, Kagome, what a pleasant surprise! Do you have everything you need back there?”

 

“Yes, it's all great! Rin wanted to say Hi, and I need to compare our schedules a little, so I am able to figure out when I can work. Are Mr. Taisho and Sesshoumaru in?”

 

Rose Taisho smiled carefully. “My husband just got in, but Sesshoumaru usually doesn't get home before eight or nine.”

 

“Ohhkaayyy…well that may have to change. As I told him when he first proposed this little arrangement, I'll need help with Rin. I lost my support staff moving out here, and I can't do all the childcare myself.”

 

Rose was apprehensive; neither her husband nor her son liked to be told what to do or when to do it. “My husband is in his study,” she said evenly. “It's this way.”

 

As they walked through corridors, Kagome snuck peaks into the rooms they passed, marveling at the furniture and art. She had been in the residences of the super-wealthy many times doing commission jobs, and, though there were exceptions, most of the interiors looked like they had been designed to show the inhabitants' wealth in the most ostentatious manner. Rooms filled with cold, expensive furnishings were more like untouchable museums than living areas in which people actually sat and talked to each other. She could often take one look at a given room and know who the designer was based on the ratio of Louis XIV to Queen Anne antiques or the amount of the trendiest colors and fabrics. The worst was the perfectly color-coordinated room, where art was purchased because it matched the divan, not because it was beautiful or interesting or appealing for any reason other than its ability to not clash. The further they got into the house, the more Kagome was impressed by the overall style and taste. There were the usual suspects—priceless antiques, handmade Persian rugs, Waterford crystal—but they were displayed to highlight the pieces themselves, not merely as acquisitions. However what caught and held Kagome's attention were the numerous foreign pieces. African masks carved from ebony, Chinese hand-painted silk screens, Japanese raku tea bowls were among the treasures.

 

“Mrs. Taisho, your house is gorgeous.”

 

“Thank you, Kagome, and please call me Rose. Art collection is one of my hobbies, especially with our travels. Sesshoumaru tells me you have some interesting pieces, and I don't believe I've mentioned to you yet how remarkable I found the tapestry at Arabesque. I would love to collaborate with you on a series of commissions at some point.”

 

Kagome was touched. “I'd be honored to work with you.”

 

“Here we are. Ken, darling,” she announced as she led Kagome and Rin into a large, well-appointed, oak-paneled room, “look who has come for a visit.”

 

Ken Taisho glanced up from his computer monitor and, on spotting Kagome, narrowed his eyes, though his expression softened slightly when Rin shyly waved at him. “Hello, young lady. How was your school today?”

 

“Good! We made baking soda volcanoes in the parking lot. My friend Shippou told Miss Maryanne that he ate it and pretended to puke. He's really good at fake puke.”

 

“Charming,” he said, sarcasm dripping.

 

Holy like father, like son, Kagome thought.

 

“Rin a good school is very important,” Mr. Taisho went on. “We know of a superior school, that I'm sure you'd do quite well at.”

 

Kagome noticed Rin's slightly panic-stricken look; she knew Rin loved it at Haven, especially because Shippou would be there next year and the downstairs neighbor boy, Jericho, would be starting as well. “Rin's school is very highly regarded, and she is excelling there,” she said firmly.

 

At that moment, Sesshoumaru entered the room, tension in the air immediately apparent.

 

“Sesshoumaru, dear,” Rose said with surprise, “you're home early.”

 

“Yes, I had a hellacious day. The office is utter chaos with Carol on vacation, and I felt I'd be more productive finishing things up here. Hello, Rin,” he said, smoothing the now-smiling girl's stubborn cowlick down without success.

 

Ken Taisho didn't miss a beat. “Don't you think that now that the child has access to the best that money can buy, she should have it?”

 

“No, I don't,” Kagome said flatly. “An inflated price tag does not automatically mean quality.”

 

Sesshoumaru and Rose looked at each other. The elder Taisho was not used to being challenged, especially by a non-family member.

 

“Sesshoumaru,” Rose said quickly, in an attempt to ease the hostility, “visited Rin's school today. How did you find it, dear?”

 

“Quite amazing. Rin and her teachers gave me a tour. The Montessori program is very interesting. The method of instruction promotes independence, and they take a sensorial approach to the introduction of mathematics. It was rather intriguing seeing what four-year olds can accomplish.”

 

Ken Taisho scowled at his son. Rose thought perhaps this was the best time to change the topic of discussion. “Kagome, did you say that you wanted to try to arrange our schedules.”

 

“Yeah,” she replied, pulling a piece of paper from her pocket. “I've got the next two weeks drawn out as a calendar. If you all could write down your obligations and working hours so I can figure out when I can count on help with Rin, I'd appreciate it. I've added all your names to the list of people acceptable to pick her up from school, and at the bottom I've written her social security number and other info; Sesshoumaru mentioned earlier that you'd want to add her to your Country Club membership. And you'll need booster seats for the cars. I recommend one for each. Switching from car to car gets old fast.”

 

Ken stared at the neatly line page with animosity. How dare this girl come in here and demand an account of his time? “I'll fill it in when my more important work is done. You are dismissed.”

 

Kagome's upper lip curled and her nostrils flared.

 

Rose sought to insulate the child from the confrontation brewing. “Rin, let's go see if Anita has any dessert.”

 

Rin was being suffocated by the ill-feelings in the room and couldn't get away fast enough.

 

Sesshoumaru couldn't recall when he had been this amused.

 

Once Rin had left the room, Kagome slammed her palms down on the desk. “Listen up, Old Man. I'm not the goddam nanny. You don't dismiss me. If we want to make this work, you will treat me as an equal partner in Rin's upbringing.”

 

Ken Taisho locked eyes with her and slowly stood. He had started as a young man and, overcoming poverty and racism, built a fortune from nothing. He was not about to be stared down by this disagreeable girl.

 

Kagome looked into the compelling amber eyes of the older alpha male and felt her pulse race. Don't back down don't back down, she mentally prodded herself, knowing that she needed to stand her ground to make it clear she was not a doormat. She didn't blink.

 

“Fine,” he said, seeing Sesshoumaru watching in the doorway, a highly entertained expression on his face. “I'm certain we can all be reasonable for the sake of the child, Miss…Higurashi.”

 

Kagome was relieved; she hated conflict, but knew when it was necessary. “I'll just go…check on Rin.” Courage abruptly gone, she spun around quickly, almost bumping into Sesshoumaru, squeaked an apology, and sped out of the room, hoping the kitchen was not difficult to locate.

 

“And you thought this was a good idea?” Ken said dryly. “Insufferably stubborn woman.”

 

“So then, you are the pot, and the kettle just scampered away. Have you met your match finally, Father?” Sesshoumaru asked, still smirking.

 

“Hn. Worse than your brother.”

 

XxXxX

 

Rin and Kagome watched from the cobbled path as Oberon raced across the vast open expanse of the lawn for an evening romp, when the girl noticed brief flashes of light flickering, scattered everywhere. “Fireflies!” she squealed. “Can I go chase them?”

 

“Sure, honey.” She saw Sesshoumaru relaxing with a newspaper and a glass of wine on the patio nearby. “I'm going to join your uncle over there. Don't make too much noise, okay?” Rin frolicked as she ran through the dampening grass, her course taking on a random quality as she followed the luminescent insects. “Mind if I join you?” Kagome asked, as she sat on a teak patio chair. “I'd like to say I'm sorry for how I acted this afternoon. I've been working my tail to the bone lately, and exhaustion makes me peevish. I promise I don't plan on making your life a living hell or anything.”

 

He regarded her silently a moment then asked, “Would you care for a glass of wine?”

 

“I'd love one, thanks,” she smiled.

 

He went to the bar and returned with an empty glass and a bottle of white. “The Missing Link?” Kagome read as he poured. “I was expecting The Wall Street Journal, not that.”

 

She had interrupted him just as he was preparing to settle down with Scarlet Letter'd. “I read the editorials and letters to see what popular opinion says about the arena,” he lied.

 

“So is your dad going to kick me out?”

 

“No. In fact I think you impressed him.”

 

“What?” Kagome asked in disbelief.

 

“My father is not a bad person, just very used to getting his own way. You've shattered all his preconceptions of you; he was unprepared to discover you are not after his money, irresponsible, or a wimp. Though I must add he has not yet met your beast nor seen your car.”

 

“Hmm…he'll come around. I can be charming if I need to be,” she asserted playfully. She felt again like flirting and internally kicked sense into herself. “So what do you think of your niece?”

 

He watched as the girl and the dog chased each other, shadows deepening across the lawn, and remembered holding her small hand that afternoon as she led him around her classroom. “She's rather…adorable.”

 

“Isn't she the best. You don't even know her yet. She is a thief of hearts, that tiny thing.” She closed her eyes and sipped her wine, enjoying the cool, dryness. “The tiredness is catching up to me. I'd love to try out that tub, but I'm afraid I'll fall asleep.” She saw Sesshoumaru was watching her intently. “Thank you. For arranging this. I thought you were crazy when you first suggested it. You really saved my ass…and I'm grateful.”

 

“You're welcome, Kagome.”

 

“It's a beautiful night, isn't it. This time of year is the best. Not super hot and buggy yet. Do you spend a lot of time out here?”

 

“When I can. I'm not home all that often, though I understand that may be changing. You won't need to do it all alone, you know.”

 

She smiled at him gratefully. “Rin Rin come on over and say good night!” she called out.

 

Rin, wearing a summer nightgown with a slightly grass-stained hem, skipped up to Sesshoumaru, stood on tip toes, and kissed him. “Nightnight.”

 

“Good night, Rin,” he said gently.

 

Kagome finished her drink. “Thanks again. For everything.” She took Rin's hand and walked to the guest house, briefly stopping to whistle for the dog.

 

Sesshoumaru watched as they walked away, then quickly turned to the back pages of the newspaper.

 

Scarlet Letter'd: Advice from the Soapbox of the Damned

 

Dear Scarlet, I am a regular reader of your column and enjoy it immensely. However I must call you out for your overuse of commas. An example is found in the response recently to Hairy Back in which you wrote: Perhaps, Hairy, your boyfriend feels you think his hair length is more important than his thoughts, opinions, desires, and him as a whole person. The comma between desires and and is redundant and unnecessary. Signed, Punctuation Freak

 

Dear Freak, I searched your letter (thank you for the lovely, handwritten letter by the way; the vast majority of my correspondence is via email) for some hidden question of a sexual nature. I parsed each word, read between the lines, used a magnifying glass, and even held it up to a candle to see if some message had been penned in invisible ink. On finding no evidence of the words dildo or bondage or rimming or ice cubes, I have no choice but to conclude the thrust of your letter is to take umbrage with my use of…The Oxford Comma!? I'm not sure if I'm turned on or appalled. For those you who have forgotten Basic Grammar, the Oxford comma aka serial comma aka Harvard comma is the comma that comes after the second-to-the-last item in a list, before the and or or. It is not often used in Great Britain, but is still considered standard usage here, though the poor little dear is beginning to fall out of favor with journalists. In fact when I first started writing this column, I threatened my editor with emasculation should I ever find one missing. Some do believe the Oxford comma is not necessary. There are certain circumstances when I definitely see their point. Take, for example, this sentence: My favorite sexual positions, in no particular order, are Doggy, Lotus and Seventh Posture. It is quite clear this is a list of three, though I still find myself compelled to write Doggy, Lotus, and Seventh Posture. But there are other occasions when the Oxford comma prevents or, at least, reduces ambiguity. Consider this: While on vacation, George and Dick plan to eat, drink, screw and meet the other tourists. Are the President and Veep taking a holiday to enjoy cuisine, imbibe, make love, and socialize? Or are they vacationing on Orgy Island? One could argue that because of word order, it is obvious. George and Dick would meet the other tourists before engaging in sexual relations with them. Anyone who makes this point has attended far more polite orgies than I have. Others may say that because there is no and before the word screw, the meaning is clear. I say it is hardly clear. At least no clearer than eat, drink, screw, and meet the other tourists. Another example of an ambiguity resulting from lack of an Oxford comma is: I would like to dedicate this column to the Pope, my fuckbuddy and my editor. No my dear Freak, the Pontiff and I are not friends with benefits, nor does he check my column—facts that are not at all clear based on that example. I'll admit that the addition of an Oxford comma does not remove all ambiguity. I would like to dedicate this column to the Pope, my fuckbuddy, and my editor could still be seen as a list of two people--my editor and someone, who bears the name or title, the Pope, with whom I am engaging in casual sex. But the only way to be certain would be to write this: I would like to dedicate this column to the Pope, to my fuckbuddy, and to my editor. I believe that sentence is redundant, awkward, and wordy, with or without the second comma.

 

Dear Scarlet, I have a problem that is so embarrassing I am totally blushing as a type. I have a boyfriend, and a few weeks ago we started having sex. My problem is…queefing. The fact that my spellchecker does not recognize this word makes me even more embarrassed. My boyfriend is getting annoyed because he says it's no biggie, but I'm so humiliated I have to stop when it I do it. I'm not super experienced, but this never happened with my other boyfriend. What should I do? Signed, Not the Noises I Want to Be Making

 

Dear Noises, Ahhh the queef. Such a lovely, onomatopoetic word, is it not? Also known as vaginal flatulence, pussy fart, vart, snatchulence, or, more crassly, cunt fart, the queef is the sound made when air which has made its way into the vagina is expelled during sex. It also can happen during exercise. It is perfectly natural; certainly not a reason for putting the brakes on otherwise satisfying intercourse. If I were your boyfriend, I'd be getting annoyed too. What to do…change positions? Put in ear plugs? Look around innocently and ask who tooted? Noises, what you need to do is relax. Sex is a physical act involving human bodies in all their naked glory. Sweat, smells, body fluids, and, yes Noises, noises are par for the course. Some guys are actually turned on by queefing; maybe your BF is one.

 

Sesshoumaru finished his wine, turned off the lights, and went into the house, wondering for the two-hundredth time the identity of this woman.

 

&&&

 

I do not own Inuyasha. Also I have no claim to National Organization of Women, The Misfits, Metallica, LebowskiFest, Beau Jocque, Waterford crystal, or The Wall Street Journal.