InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Decisions ❯ We Will Be Experiencing Some Turbulence ( Chapter 20 )

Chapter 20: We Will Be Experiencing Some Turbulence

Love is a strange thing. And most often it is not voiced, but there unmentioned and unquestioned. Sometimes however love needs to be voiced to be understood because insecurities leave us doubting and troubled. Not everything is black and white.

Kagome and Sesshoumaru were mated and as such in human terms were considered somewhere between lovers and married. It was strange and... loud.

Arguments were strife and they had only been this way for a month.

Kagome was sat in a cafe with Sango and Kikyo watching the bustling crowds wander past.

“Isn't that a good thing?” Sango asked in confusion

“Oh, come on!” Kagome stormed “I can't let him buy me the stupid dress!”

“Why?” Sango was still plenty confused

“It's symbolic” Kagome growled “I can't let him start paying for everything, I pay for myself. If I let him provide for me I'm regressing”

“There's a difference between independence and stubbornness” Kikyo pointed out sipping her coffee “you found that out last time, at least he's not going behind your back” she paused “besides you overreact way too much with things that threaten your independence”

“Yeah but if I agree to this the next thing you know I'll be moving in with him” Kagome glowered at her coffee

“And why is that a bad thing?” Sango asked

Kagome smiled a little sadly “Things have been left unsaid” she told them rubbing the mark on her neck absentmindedly.

***

Sesshoumaru watched his mate dig through her clothes determinedly and he wondered what she thought she was going to find in there. He was half reclined on her bed watching her with one eyebrow raised.

He had been invited to yet another Charity ball and even though he normally managed to worm his way out of the ghastly things, his irate PR manager had tracked him down and begged just short of crying. Sesshoumaru had acquiesced in the end, albeit morosely. So as such he had invited Kagome to go with him, with the obvious offer that he would buy her a dress.

So far he wasn't having much luck on that offer. She had point blank refused, ranted at him for a few minutes and then left his apartment. So now he was sat on her slightly sagging bed watching her with an eyebrow raised, wondering exactly what she thought was going to materialise just because she wanted it to do so. Sure she had a will of iron, but even she could not make dresses materialise from nothing.

He could feel her frustration, ire and stubborn belief radiating from the mark she bore on her neck and wondered whose stupid idea it had been to let the male side of the mating partnership privy to all of the female's emotions. He had learnt not to tell her what she was feeling though, she got really angry when he did that. And as much as her fury was amusing, she tended to break things when storming away in a fit of pique, like her body. That he was not fond of.

He frowned as a blue shirt hit him in the head and pulled it off his head to look at her again. She had dropped to her knees and was rooting around in the bottom of the endless closet now. He smirked.

Kagome shrieked in shock as she was lifted from her kneeling position and pulled into strong arms that constricted around her, inescapable and yet gentle.

He sat back on the bed with his small mate in his lap and leaned his chin on her shoulder.

“As much as the stubbornness is an intrinsic part of you, this is becoming tedious” he pointed out, a certain smugness tainting his voice.

She tried and failed to dig him in the ribs with her elbow and growled “Not fair”

“No one said that this Sesshoumaru had to be fair” he pointed out

“I don't want you to buy me a dress!” she was exasperated

“This Sesshoumaru had not bought you a single thing since we became mated” he sighed, he was not normally the sort of being who would placate someone, ever. And yet that was what he was preparing himself to do “Perhaps this once is acceptable?”

“The vase” she reminded him

“At the time we were not mated” he pointed out

She sighed “You think I'm being petty?”

“No, too stubborn to function” he chided and she groaned

“Am not”

“Now you have rapidly regressed to the age of Rin” he smirked

“Alright” she sighed, making it sound like he was marching her off to get her ass branded like a cattle or something equally as heinous rather than offering to buy her a dress.

Suddenly she stiffened and crowed happily “I've got it!”

“What?” Sesshoumaru asked

“The dress I wore when I went out with that creep Bankotsu!” she leapt from his lap and dived into the closet once more.

“This Sesshoumaru would appreciate it if you didn't wear the dress you wore to meet him” he said in a calm-ish voice. He was having problems repressing the residual rage he felt from that night.

She ignored him and let out a triumphant noise as she seized hold of the dress from the depths of her closet. She stood and held it against her body, smoothing it down across her curves.

“It won't work” Sesshoumaru commented

She turned to glare daggers at the Yokai “And why not?”

“It is torn” he said walking over to her and pointing at the long gash hiding in the seams at the bottom.

“What!” she yelped “how?”

“That night was not exactly uneventful” he pointed out

“Fine” she threw it in the approximate direction of the bin in a huff “You can buy me the dress”

Sesshoumaru smiled like the wolf that had cornered the unsuspecting sheep “Very well”

She gulped.

***

Why me? The thought was buzzing through Kagome's head as she surveyed the room full of very important people whose names she forgot as soon as they were mentioned. She was clinging to Sesshoumaru's arm like it was a life preserver and she was drowning.

At least she looked the part. She was wearing a ridiculously expensive dress by some designer. It was black with a knotted front and hung off the shoulders falling to just below the knee. She had to admit it was the most expensive thing, if you didn't count the flat, that she owned. And that alone was enough to bring out her insecurity complex.

Her shoes were getting funny looks. Could they tell she had bought them at a market for next to nothing? How could they possibly know? She gripped tighter onto Sesshoumaru's arm, wondering if she should have taken him up on the offer to buy those shoes that had gone so beautifully with the dress.

Sesshoumaru grit his teeth together and wondered how on earth his little Miko was managing to stand up under the weight of her insecurity, agitation and bizarrely enough boredom. He was having problems appearing impassive.

He tensed as the aura of maliciousness that was Naraku rolled over them and sighed internally as Kagome stopped being insecure and became both angry and scared. How did the woman cope with so many emotions at once?

He felt the rise in her reiyouku and placed a hand over hers on his arm “You cannot purify him here Kagome” he felt her calm down slightly, as she always did when he called her name. He was amazed words could have that effect on a being, but thankful at that point in time.

“Sesshoumaru-sama” Naraku said smoothly sliding into their personal space with the fluidity of a weasel, there was an accessory-like demoness on his arm, eyes fixed on Sesshoumaru. She was seemingly trying to seduce Sesshoumaru with her eyes. He was less than impressed.

Kagome bristled at the look the demoness was giving Sesshoumaru. She was very beautiful, ice blond hair, long claws painted red, haughty lime green eyes, high cheekbones and an impossible pout that was painted a dark plum colour. Her dress matched her shoes which matched her clutch. Obviously no expense had been spared.

“Naraku” Sesshoumaru said, his voice ice and untouchable

“It's been a long while since we last talked” Naraku smiled slimily at Kagome who glowered back at him.

“That would be because you are a sore loser” Sesshoumaru stated in his usual impassive monotone

“Hmph” Naraku muttered “have you met Azami? She's a writer for one of Japan's leading Tabloid newspapers”

“No” Sesshoumaru stated baldly

“Don't be silly Sesshoumaru-kun” Azami purred “we have met a number of times before” no one present missed the innuendo and Kagome had to remember that purifying people for being bitchy was wrong.

“Really?” Sesshoumaru raised a brow “it must have been an unremarkable encounter then”

Azami tensed and flushed furiously before giving Kagome a look that should have killed. “And who is this? A ningen Sesshoumaru, your tastes have changed” she paused and smiled, dripping vindictive poison.

Sesshoumaru was about to rip her head off, when they were told that dinner had been served and he realised that he wasn't allowed to disembowel in public.

The seating gods obviously didn't much like Kagome and as such she was sat on a different table from Sesshoumaru, directly opposite the `lovely' Azami.

“So Kagome” Azami started and Kagome noted the distinct lacking of any honorific. “How long have you known Sesshoumaru-kun?”

“About a year” Kagome stated calmly

“Really?” Azami feigned surprise “but you were only marked a short while ago”

“Yes”

“You must be quite extraordinary for a human, after all you were able to capture Sesshoumaru's eye” she twirled her hair around her finger

“I guess” Kagome frowned at the plate

“But I don't see it” Azami continued in the same `I'm being friendly' tone “I mean you're just a working class, unremarkable ningen” she frowned slightly “how do you keep his attention?”

“What do you mean?” Kagome ground out between gritted teeth

“I mean, with just a weak ningen partner, surely you must know that Sesshoumaru-kun will be looking elsewhere for company” she smiled vindictively “or did you really think you were enough to satisfy him?”

“Well you obviously weren't considering you were never marked” Kagome bit out, her hackles rising. This was hitting a sore spot that she was still trying to come to terms with. She could still remember how much it had hurt her when he had slept with all those women. And they hadn't even been mated at the time.

Azami glowered slightly “but you are not tied to him yet, still so disposable”

“Really?” Kagome asked idly “and there was me thinking a mating mark meant we were compatible”

This earned her another grimace “It must be nice” she sighed whimsically

“What?”

“Being mated to someone who buys you things” she glanced down meaningfully at her dress “I can imagine it is a novel experience for you, but not unwelcome”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“What do you work as?”

“A head teacher”

“Precisely, it must be nice now not to have to worry about money anymore, now that you have Sesshoumaru to pay for you” she smiled

“I'm not a gold digger” Kagome growled

“Oh, I suppose not” she glanced at Kagome's accessories and wrinkled her nose “I guess that you can't mean that much to him if he only bought you a dress” she paused and put a finger to her chin thoughtfully “like some kind of mistress” she laughed maliciously

Kagome glanced at the people near them, but they seemed to be on Azami's side, all demons and all feigning ignorance at the less than polite turn their conversation had taken. And, she noted with some dismay they were all women and all probably jealous.

“I like my independence” she stated blandly

“I should imagine that you have moved into Sesshoumaru's place already” Azami smiled

“I have not”

“Why ever not?” she sounded confused but was obviously gleeful

“Like I said I like my independence” Kagome repeated. It was hard to sit there and listen to this woman dig up all her anxieties about her relationship with Sesshoumaru.

“Really?” she asked in a tone that suggested she doubted it. “So you and Sesshoumaru-kun are happy?”

“Yes”

“No arguments?”

This time it was Kagome who winced and Azami smiled her sharks smile “So I guess that means that your Tying should happen fairly soon”

“Perhaps”

Azami grinned wider “Oh dear, not very sure are you” she paused for effect “never mind, at least you know he loves you”

Kagome closed her eyes for a second and balled her hands into fists. Azami smiled in victory and left Kagome to brood, engaging in decidedly more gentile small talk with the others on the table.

Kagome ate in silence; she just wanted to go home. No scratch that, she wanted to stop feeling so goddamn insecure. This journalist certainly knew how to dish it; Kagome had been reduced to a bundle of indecision and apprehension.

Did he love her?

***

Sesshoumaru was watching his mate carefully. She was sat in the huge white swivel chair in the living room in his apartment with a pile of paperwork on her lap, her tongue poking out of the corner of her mouth as she concentrated.

The children were spending the day out with Miroku and Sango at some kind a special park. He hadn't really understood that, weren't all parks the same? According to Ranmaru this one was the `coolest'.

Normal enough, except that he was being bombarded with waves of insecurity and depression from the mating bond. And he had no idea how to stop it.

She had been like that since the charity ball, and refused to tell him why. He knew it had something to do with Azami but she was surprisingly silent on the matter.

“Kagome” he said softly

She looked up at him slowly, her hair hanging in her eyes clasping her folder to her chest in a pose that was achingly innocent.

“Yes?”

“Have you thought any more about moving in?” he asked

She stiffened “Why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“Why do you want me to move in with you Sesshoumaru?”she asked slowly, her eyes obscured by her hair as she looked down at her lap.

“It makes sense” he said shrugging nonchalantly “we are constantly having to cart the children from one place to another, and there is hardly any room in your flat”

Her shoulders shook violently once and she shoved the file into the bag resting at her feet before standing abruptly, shouldering her bag, shoving her shoes on, donning her coat and walking towards the door.

He was seized by sudden paralysis as her emotions rolled over him in waves; hurt, anger, disappointment and most prominent of all, betrayal.

“Kagome?” he whispered

She whipped around to look at him tears whipping off her face to hit the wall next to her. The smell of them was acrid to him and his head spun to come up with reasoning behind her actions.

“If that's the only reason you can give me then I won't waste any more of our time” she said softly as new tears ran down the tracks on her face “Sayonara”

The door slammed with a reverberating force.

Sesshoumaru blinked. The tears that had hit the wall rolled slowly down.

And Sesshoumaru was left alone. Again.

***

Kagome sat in the cafe a couple of streets away from Ayame's flat, where Ran was currently holed up. She sighed as she glanced at the falling snow, it was almost October and already attempting to snow. It was getting late and she wasn't in the best part of town. But she couldn't bring herself to care. In fact she could really drum up much enthusiasm for anything since she had walked out on Sesshoumaru.

It had only been a week. And yet that week stretched out as an infinite moment, empty and devoid of purpose. Eating away at her with the loneliness of the thing. She didn't know what to do any more.

Sighing, as seemed to be the norm for her, she vacated the warm booth and stepped out onto the pavement wincing as the biting cold wormed its way through her thin jacket. After a moment she relaxed into it as her face became numb, it was suiting considering that's what the rest of her felt like too. Hollow.

She decided to take the alley that ran along the side of the cafe due to the quicker route.

Regret soon followed this decision as she walked straight into Naraku. She tumbled backwards, regaining her balanced to stand little over a metre away from him.

“Why?” she murmured through trembling lips

“Why what my little Ka-Go-Me?” he smirked as he moved closer to her

“Why me?” she asked

“You are a Miko, pure and righteous, it is written in my very nature to taint that purity” he smirked “won't you be tainted by me?”

“Leave me alone!” she attempted to purify him but nothing happened

“Your powers are tied to your emotions, as long as you feel so desolate you can do nothing” his eyes flashed with a mad desire before he reached forward and cupped a cheek in his palm. He pulled her to him and attempted to drag her with him to god knows where, she slapped him across the face and he slapped her harder in retaliation before grabbing her by her shoulders. Her lip split and was beginning to bleed and one side of her face was red.

“No!” she cried shoving her hands against his chest and running along the alleyway, away from him. She cursed herself as her foot got caught on her other foot and she crashed down hard on to the concrete beneath her.

Naraku loomed over her and cracked his knuckles “I'm going to enjoy this” he chuckled “you're coming with me”

She shrieked and lashed out with her foot, kicking at his hand only to have him capture her ankle and drag her along the cold, wet concrete to him. As he reeled her in part of her brain spared a moment to wonder what the hissing noise was...

Then Naraku tensed, releasing her ankle abruptly and arched his back, hissing in pain. But there was the other hissing noise too. Naraku fell to his knees and Kagome scrambled backwards rapidly.

Behind Naraku stood Sesshoumaru his aura swirling around him, he was so furious his eyes had bleed completely red, and his aura had actually taken on a visual appearance crackling around him and causing his long hair to billow out.

“Leave, now” he growled at Naraku and the Hanyou realising he was going to die if he didn't take the advice quickly vanished into the night.

Sesshoumaru turned blood red eyes on one completely stunned Miko and pounced upon her. Knocking the wind from her he pulled her into a bone crushing hug and bit into her neck where his mark still lay.

“Ah!” she winced but did not try to move, she guessed he was punishing her, but to be honest she still didn't care. She hadn't allowed her heart to begin beating again, not when he could have helped her because it was `logical' or some other reason. Sometimes enough was enough.

“Why did you go?” he asked pulling back slightly so that obsidian could gaze into topaz.

“You didn't want me”

“What gave you that impression?”

“You never told me you loved me”

“Neither did you” he stated shaking his head at her “This Sesshoumaru is not used to having to express emotions, this Sesshoumaru does not know how to be in a relationship”

“You were insecure too?” she asked carefully

He sighed “More like presumptuous. This Sesshoumaru thought that because this Sesshoumaru was kinder to you than others you would understand”

“I can't read minds” she sighed and leant her head on his shoulder

“I love you Kagome” he whispered, he had spoken her name again and for once he spoke in first person.

She gave a hiccupping laugh “I love you too” she murmured into his throat

“Words do not make sense to this Sesshoumaru” he frowned as he rested his chin on her head “Why do you take so much comfort from them rather than from actions?”

“You prefer actions?” she asked

“Hn”

She chuckled even if it was slightly breathless “Then I guess we should just compromise” she said looping an arm around his neck and pulling her body up his so that she could kiss him. She poured all of her love into that one kiss and felt him respond in kind.

They were finally...home.

A/N: There will be more... I'd like to throw Naraku into hell before I complete, but there will be some sugary sweetness to compliment that! There will be another chapter and an epilogue. I don't own Inuyasha and I'd like to thank everyone who has ever reviewed.