InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Distance and Time ❯ Part 1 ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, Rumiko Takahashi does.

~*~

“I had a wonderful time,” she murmured sincerely. “The festival was amazing. So much good food and fun games…” She grinned up at him and squeezed the hand she held. “Thank you for taking me,” she said appreciatively and leaned into him in a pseudo-hug. He felt his insides would burst he was so happy. He hadn't expected to have a good time at the festival, but he knew Kagome would, as much as she loved going into the larger villages. He figured he would simply enjoy her enjoyment, but he'd ended up have a great evening as well.

“Welcome,” he said briefly. The pair stopped at the entrance to Kaede's hut, and Inuyasha loosed her hand with no small amount of reluctance. “I should go.”

“Can't you stay?” she questioned temptingly, having tangled her fingers in the trailing sleeve of his coat as he'd turned to make his exit. “I think I'd really like it if you stayed.” The warm light from the fire within the hut gave her a sultry glow to match her enticing smirk as she stood in the doorway, and he found himself considering it before shaking his head in refusal.

“Nah, I can't stay…I've got a bit of a project that needs my attention when you don't have it,” he quipped.

“What kind of project?

“The kind that I would have outright said what it was if I wanted you to know instead of saying `project',” he pointed out dryly. She gave a short laugh and rolled her eyes, letting go of his sleeve in favor of crossing her arms over her chest.

“Whatever,” she drawled, giving him a sidelong look as she turned into the hut. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight…” His eyes trailed over her, gauging whether he could get away with one tiny intimate gesture….he leaned in and quickly pecked her on the cheek, his lips just barely grazing the corner of her mouth as he pulled away. She gasped lightly, a good one, one of surprise, and the fingers of one hand flew up to press against the spot, while the other arm tightened across her chest. She smiled cutely at him, her nose wrinkling as a bit of red colored it.

“I wasn't expecting that,” she admitted, pressing her lips together tightly, but still smiling.

“ `s it okay?” he probed, though he already knew by her body language and scent that it was.

“Very okay,” she affirmed. “See you tomorrow?” she asked, though she undoubtedly knew that she would.

“Tomorrow,” he nodded, giving her a smile of his own before she crooked her fingers at him coyly and retreated into the hut.

Goofy smile still in place, Inuyasha retreated to the forest line, feeling giddy, purposeful, encouraged, and confident all at the same time. He supposed his courtship was made easier by the knowledge that the object of his affections had already made her feelings clear, but even still. It was nice to get affirmation like that.

He walked leisurely through the woods, something he never did, usually opting to run everywhere. He reveled in the feel of the cool summer night breeze across his face as he strolled toward his destination, the haven of the project that he'd working on for the last few weeks. It had only been when their information surrounding Naraku's position had been confirmed that he even felt he had a right to begin such a project, permanent as it was. He supposed he'd gained a certain level of confidence, not only surrounding his intended's feelings about him, but also with regards to how likely it was that their quest would end in success. Thinking back on the final battle, and how close it had all been to having a very different outcome, he supposed he'd begun his project with hopes of occupying his mind with something other than pre-battle jitters, uncertainties about his capabilities, and questions about how everything would come to an end after a years-long quest. One thing was certain: his love for Kagome. Even though they had yet to say the words face to face, it was clear how they both felt, and working on a project that was a manifestation of his feelings for her provided a much needed distraction for his addled mind.

So taken was he with his plans, making a few mental notes of directions he wanted to take his project in, that he was surprised when a pale soul catcher slithered between his ankles. He looked down with a gasp, his eyes immediately snapping to follow the creature as it glided towards its master. He blinked in surprise, shaking his head to clear it while reminding himself to pay attention. He sighed, a bit put out. He simply wanted to get to work, but the miko's presence could not be ignored. Glancing about to ensure they were alone, he recognized how silly it was of him to do that; Kagome was sound asleep by now in Kaede's hut a good distance away, and he had no reason to act stealthy—his heart belonged to her. Even still, he felt somewhat guilty about being in Kikyou's presence without Kagome's knowledge. He approached her as she gave a soul catcher a light pat on the head.

“Hi, Kikyou,” he greeted casually. The clay woman clasped her hands in front of her.

“Inuyasha,” she said solemnly. “You look…happy.” At the mere mention of the word, a lopsided grin slipped over his lips, and he ducked his head, biting the inside of his cheek.

“I am,” he murmured. “It's been a good week.”

“Hn,” she hummed shortly, and his grin slipped away at her cold appraisal of him. He shifted uncomfortably, his toes digging into the soft, warm earth.

“This isn't a coincidence, is it,” he asked more than stated.

“There are no coincidences, Inuyasha,” Kikyou responded loftily as she knelt to pluck a dandelion from the forest floor by her feet. “Everything comes as it was meant to.” Inuyasha stared at her, as she fingered the small yellow flower.

“Okay…” he said slowly. “So…what's up?” She looked up at him from her flower, straightening with her chin held high.

“I've come to have you fulfill your promise to me. To take you with me to Hell, so that I may rest in peace.”

Inuyasha's eyes widened at that, and he held his hands up, shaking his head slowly.

“Oh, no no…Kikyou, I….I can't do that,” he said softly. “I'm sorry…but I can't go to Hell with you.” Her expression was almost a stiff smile, and her eyes narrowed in what was almost curiosity as she tilted her head.

“You speak as though you have a choice,” she puzzled. “Hn…” Inuyasha frowned.

“What do you mean as though I have a choice? Of course I do—”

“You made a vow, Inuyasha,” she interrupted firmly. “A vow cannot be simply thrown to the wind once you feel differently,” she said acerbically. “It is binding.”

“Binding until the conditions of the vow have been met,” he argued.

“Yes,” she agreed. Inuyasha groaned exasperatedly, shaking his head.

“Then what are you talking about, Kikyou? Why are we even having this conversation?” He was really beginning to wish he'd ignored her intrusive little soul catcher. She had seriously spoiled his good mood, and effectively worked him into a deep funk in less than ten minutes.

“The conditions of your vow have not been met. And unfortunately for you, they can now never be met,” she stated simply. Her eyes lowered to her dandelion, and she began her incessant stroking again. Dark brows settled dangerously low as he stared at her suspiciously, trying to figure out what she was playing at.

“I gave you my word…that I would avenge your death. Naraku is dead. I don't owe you my life, Kikyou, not anymore,” he said plainly.

“It was a promise that you made.”

“Yes, on the basis of a condition that I have since fulfilled. Naraku is dead,” he repeated.

“Was it you who dealt the fatal blow?” she asked simply. Her question hung in the still air between them, and silence stretched in full. “As I remember it, it was your elder half brother who was the one to lay Naraku to rest at last.”

“Sesshomaru wouldn't have been able to do it if I hadn't—”

“It matters not. You were to avenge me, not help to avenge me.”

“Taking that bastard down was not a one man job, Kikyou! It never was and you know it!”

“Are you saying that you couldn't have done it on your own? That you are too weak to have done it on your own?” she pushed. Inuyasha floundered for a moment, his mouth opening and closing frantically. He hated to admit his weaknesses…it was another weakness, he supposed, to try to seem invincible when he clearly was not. But if there was one thing Kagome had taught him, it was that having weaknesses did not make one weak, but granted us personhood. She likened sharing and admitting weaknesses to swapping embarrassing stories to make the idea palatable to him, but he understood her meaning without the analogy. If he confessed to a weakness, it gave him the opportunity to seek help from others, and to accomplish so much more than he could ever hope to on his own. Swallowing his pride, he took a deep breath.

“Yes, I was too…weak…to have done it on my own. All of us were too weak to have done it by ourselves,” he explained. “That's why killing him was a group effort—”

“Then you do see that you made a promise that you would never be able to keep. You made a vow…the conditions of which you could never fulfill.”

Inuyasha began to tremble, and he fell silent, for the moment, at a loss for words. Kikyou was serious; she intended to drag him to Hell with her, to end his life just as soon as he thought it was his own to claim.

“I thought…I thought you and I were okay. I thought my debt was settled.” He looked up at her, pleading silently. “Kikyou…be reasonable here…. Even…even with me saying that I alone would be the one to avenge you…the outcome is the same: Naraku is dead, you've been avenged. Please—”

“It is our destiny, Inuyasha. Our fate. You cannot escape fate, no matter how many times you dodge it. Eventually, it will catch up to you.”

“I'm happy,” he stressed, clenching his fists at his sides. “For once, I'm happy. I can't just—”

“And so I am doomed to wander the earth simply because you're happy?” she spat. Inuyasha gazed at her helplessly.

“You can go on your own, Kikyou,” he said tiredly. “We both know that.”

“In order for me to be at peace—”

“I'm courting her,” he whispered. “I…Last week…a few days after the battle…I initiated.” He sheepishly picked at the hem of his coat sleeve, not wanting to look at her face. “I've made a commitment. I…I have to see it through.”

Kikyou stared at him for a long while and he breathlessly awaited her words. Her glare was poisonous, yet blank and he felt ill.

“Did you really think that argument would work?” she asked as though he were daft. Inuyasha paled. “It's interesting how you're so eager to fulfill commitments made to her, but those made to me…they mean nothing,” she stated. Inuyasha sagged, wiping his hands over his face. He was keeping his fit at bay, but only just so. His heart was beating too fast; he felt disconnected, jumpy, and hot.

“You've been avenged,” he whispered.

“There was a time where you would have courted me,” she murmured, looking back down at her dandelion. “We would have wished the jewel away together, made you human…had a few children. Two boys and a little girl…I had thought of their names already.”

He gulped, feeling edgier than ever with Kikyou speaking wistfully of what could have been. He felt sympathy for her, he truly did. Empathy even, for he knew the bitter sting of having hopes and dreams snatched from you. If she continued down her original course, he would feel it yet again, and all too soon.

“Kikyou,” he started gently. “I am sorry…so very sorry that things did not work out the way…the way you had planned. You…you deserved all those things that you wanted, and more probably. But you and I…you and I were not meant. I think you know that, deep down. I think you always knew. You were a wonderful friend to me when I had never had one. You took mercy on me when no one else ever had. I'll always be grateful to you for that.” The clay woman shifted, her gaze moving out beyond him. “You meant so much to me. You still do…” he added carefully. “Kikyou, please…please don't make me leave her.”

Her gaze shifted to meet his eyes head on. Her answer was silent, yet clear, and he felt physical pain, a searing tear through his gut as she extended her white cold hands towards him, palms down.

“Come.”

His heart tattooed in his chest, and a bead of sweat danced from his hairline to his clenched jaw. His lips were tight and pressed together, his stomach churning so that he thought he might vomit.

“Can you…” he began, his voice rough with sadness and pain. “Can you just give me a few minutes…to…to clear my head? Alone?” Her hesitation had him giving an addendum. “I won't run. You'd find me anyway.” The smallest inclination of her head was his cue to do as he'd asked. With clumsy, shaking legs, he stumbled away from her, scarcely able to draw one steady breath.

Unsteady though they were, his feet carried him to Kaede's hut, the windows now dark. He took a moment to pull himself together so that he could be as silent as he needed to be in order to avoid waking the tiny hut's occupant. Pushing aside the reed mat, he immediately found the sleeping form he was looking for, and knelt by her side. What a lovely sight she made; a sad smile touched the corner of his mouth as he drank her in.

Her dark hair lay about her head in endearing disarray. Her lips were parted, and the fingers of one hand were curled towards her face, bathed in the moonlight from the adjacent window. The thin strap of her pajama top had slipped down her smooth shoulder, and he gently placed it in its proper position. As she was sleeping on her side, gravity pressed her breasts together, giving him a view of her more than ample cleavage. She inhaled deeply and sighed, and he felt he could be close to tears.

“I always disappoint you,” he mouthed silently. “And now's no different. I'm so sorry…” He shut his eyes, tried to slow his breathing. “I wanted to give you everything—” His head hung low. “Forgive me.” He leaned low and pressed a kiss to her forehead, through the cool hair of her bangs, and exited quickly before he lost his composure and wept at her feet.

He ran to the well, sagging heavily with his back against it and breathing hard though he wasn't tired. He waited for his fate, for his doom, to fulfill a promise he thought he'd made good on. It was cruel, he thought. To be so close to everything that he wanted, to everything he'd worked so very hard for, risked his life for…only to have it all be snatched away by a mere technicality.

He felt her presence arrive, though he made no move to acknowledge it. She approached him, soft footsteps in the grass, and stopped right beside where he was seated. Cold fingers touched his scalp, and he instinctively strained his ears away from her touch. If she was offended, she didn't make it known, for she simply combed her hard digits through the hair between his ears absently, as though this was a normal act for them. He felt uncomfortable, and wanted to pull away, but didn't. What did it matter? She was already about to have her way with his life.

“Autumn,” she said quietly. Inuyasha was confused, but said nothing. “I'll give you until autumn.” He looked up at her, and her fingers fell away from his head. She looked solemnly down at him. “Say your goodbyes. Settle your debts. Finish what you can with the time that you've been given. And when the summer ends, I will come to collect you.”

His gaze fell from hers, and he stared out across the field. It was already the beginning of June. And September was quite warm…how was he to know when summer ended and autumn began exactly? It was a matter of instinct in his mind. But what if he supposed autumn began at the end of September, and she supposed much sooner? What then?

“When the first leaf falls from the Goshinboku…autumn will have officially begun. Know that that evening, at sunset, I will come for you,” she elaborated, as though she'd read his mind. He continued to stare listlessly across the field, the grass shimmering with the light from the full moon. “Are you not pleased?” she asked. “Are you not grateful for the gift of time that you have been given, though you surely do not deserve it?”

Inuyasha said nothing. Should he be grateful? Perhaps. Did he feel grateful? He didn't know. Whether she took him tonight or in a few months' time, the end result was the same: no Kagome. He kept his silence. He couldn't tell if his reticence had any affect on her, but she stiffened at his side and began to glide ethereally away from him, her soul catchers surrounding her.

“Commit to nothing. No verbal contracts or agreements. We wouldn't want you to make any more promises that you'll be unable to keep,” she declared as she moved away. He couldn't tell if her statement was laced with sincerity or bitterness, but he decided that he simply didn't care.

She disappeared before she reached the tree line.

He felt more enslaved and trapped than he ever had before.

~*~

Author's Note:

Hi Everyone!

So….it's been like an *extremely* long time since I've done…well…anything fanfiction related. What can I say? College is hard, and my summers were busy. But I honestly never stopped thinking about the Inuyasha series, strangely enough. Hope you like this one, and I hope I'm not too rusty. I just kind of banged it out in a couple of hours…Part 2 coming (relatively) soon!