InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Do What You Have to Do ❯ Chapter 31: For only you ( Chapter 31 )

Title: Do What You Have To Do
Author: DeityOfDeath
Archive: Yes please...
Pairings: Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo
Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi
rating: NC-17/R
Spoilers: Most likely.
Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS!
Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies.

Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review!

The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Do What You Have to Do" by Sarah McLachlan

Chapter 31: For only you

He came to stand a few feet from me and I felt like didn't belong breathing the same air let alone standing before this youkai in my pale orange kimono with its worn and frayed sleeves, my hair unkempt and messy as it fell down my back and my belly pushing up and into the material which stretched across it.

His eyes bore into mine and I fidgeted and out of nervous habit wrapped my arms around my noticeable bump bringing his eyes to it before he looked up into my eyes once more.

“InuYasha…”

I stared at him and couldn't help but fight to swallow as his presence and energy overwhelmed me. I watched as he took a step closer and I fought not to step back. He was beautiful and elegant and I felt so wrong being in his presence and yet he took another step coming closer and closer. He soon had closed the distance between us and I could clearly see the mixed emotions of longing, excitement, relief and something that was so intense I could not think of a word for it, reflected in his molten gold eyes.

That intense look seemed to outweigh the other emotions and as he came to stand before me it filled his eyes causing my heartbeat to quicken along with my breathing. He lifted his right hand and gently brought it to my face his thumb tracing over my cheek and jaw.

I felt my cheeks warm as he leaned in close, his breath warm on my face and then he gently pressed his soft lips to my forehead and kissed his way down to each cheek, my nose, my chin and then he finally pressed his lips firmly against my own lips and my breath stopped as my heart pounded and I subconsciously lifted my hands and placed them on his arms as they came to wrap around my body holding me against him. His lips left mine and I found that I was not the only one breathing hard. I stared up at him and couldn't help but feel intrigued and lost in this youkai who seemed to cause such emotions to overflow inside of me.

“I have missed you.”

At his soft words I felt lost and it must have shown on my face because the expression on his face grew worried.

“What is wrong,” and as the words left his mouth I fought to find the words to best answer him.

“I am sad to say that your mate sustained a serious head injury in his absence and he is only just beginning to regain his memory,” both Sesshomaru and I turned to our left to see Lord Pacchiri standing with Lady Amira at his side as they watched us with soft pleasant expressions.

Sesshomaru looked down at me and I nodded as I gave him a sad smile.

“Is this true? Is this why you didn't return? It wasn't because you had grown tired of this Sesshomaru,” and as he asked I could hear some hope in his voice.

“If I could remember I'm pretty sure I could answer you properly…right now I can say I recall you in my memories but everything is like a book with its pages torn out only there are no page numbers to help put them in order.”

He nodded and closed his eyes taking a deep breath and letting it out before his arms released my body slowly pulling away and caressing me as he did so. I felt cold without his body warmth and as my arms fell away from his I instead wrapped them around myself feeling vulnerable all of a sudden.

“We had hoped to stall your reunion until we could have words but as usual you have surprised us with your sudden appearance,” and at Lord Pacchiri's words I stepped back and fought to recover my senses.

I watched as Sesshomaru looked around him at the carriages and men on horseback before bringing his eyes back to me and my swollen belly before turning once more to look Lord Pacchiri in the eye.

“I could feel his presence and came to investigate.”

At Sesshomaru's words I saw Lord Pacchiri nod in understanding, “Well if you would be so kind as to join us in my carriage we can all talk and perhaps clear the air a bit before we arrive at your castle.”

I felt Kouga come to stand at my side and he looked into my wide eyes and frowned, “Are you okay?”

I nodded and fought to control my feelings and inner turmoil as best I could as I nodded, “I suppose as okay as I am going to be until my memory returns.”

Kouga nodded, “It would be nice if they could keep your stress down as much as possible but I don't see that happening. If you start to feel sick or any pain let me or any of us know. Shocks and stress aren't good for anyone carrying.”

I gave him a small smile and nodded, “Thanks Kouga.”

“No thanks needed muttface. I kind of got you into this mess so hopefully I can help you make it less of a mess.”

I felt something warm and heavy lay over my shoulders and I turned to look into Mirdoriko's worried green eyes, “Take strength in those around you,” and she leaned in pressing a kiss to my forehead.

I nodded and watched her return to the wagon I had lived in for these past few months and I yearned to return to it and yet I knew I couldn't. I turned back around and walked side by side with Kouga who stayed with me and helped me back into Lord Pacchiri's wagon. I passed Lord Pacchiri who stood outside beside one of his higher ranked guards on horseback.

Once inside I was helped into a sitting position between Kouga and Lady Amira on soft cushions and as I looked up I watched as Sesshomaru sat directly across from me. We sat there and eyed each other almost nervously as we waited for Lord Pacchiri to return and oversee us and this situation. I wasn't sure if we actually needed others involved or whether we just needed time alone to talk and reacquaint ourselves.

Lord Pacchiri entered the carriage and the door was closed and as soon as he sat the carriage began moving once more.

“So where to begin…”, Lord Pacchiri's words seemed to have startled us but only I had jumped at his booming voice which had startled me and made the little one within wiggle and move giving me some discomfort.

“Where was my wayward mate found,” asked Sesshomaru as he watched me rub my belly in the directions I felt the most movement.

“He was found by the troop we are currently traveling with in a small village by the shore in Hagi. I was told by the troop elder that he was a visitor and seemed to have made friends with the villagers before it was attacked.”

I continued ahead of Lord Pacchiri, “I don't remember much. I was in and out of consciousness a few times. Midoriko had said I was playing hero and had helped to save two of the kids in our troop and I had been shot by a few arrows. She says she found me bleeding on the ground after the village had been burned down; my head busted in a few places.”

I sighed and rubbed my belly, “I woke up and was told that I was carrying and I realized I had no memory of anything from before waking in their wagon. I was given a place among their troop and they kept me fed and clothed. I started remembering little things and memories seem to come in spurts. There's no saying if I'll ever remember everything but when I remember something I write it down.”

Kouga frowned along with Sesshomaru and both seemed to turn and look at each other before looking back at me.

“Naomi says it is best that I take things slowly and things will come to me in time and that I have plenty to spare.”

Sesshomaru nodded, “Do you remember me or recognize me,” and as he asked he looked so serious and hopeful at the same time. I didn't want to crush that hope.

“I knew of you…I had seen you in dreams and memories. I couldn't put a name to your face. I know we have children together and that we've had our ups and downs.”

He frowned and as he looked into my eyes and I his he looked almost like a kicked puppy or like a child that had gotten caught being bad; so much remorse and sadness in those golden eyes.

“I wouldn't have let you come so close to me let alone kiss me if I had thought you were a cruel or vicious individual. I am assuming it is your child in my belly which means I like or liked you enough to make it,” and as the words flowed from my mouth I watched as his eyes grew wide in astonishment and he nodded and looked over at my belly once more as if he yearned to touch it.

I wasn't comfortable enough just yet to allow it and especially not in our current company so I simply gave a small grin.

“Should I keep the children from meeting you until you are comfortable” and as he asked I felt his concern and it made my grin widen.

“No, I am excited to meet…see them. I am worried that they will be upset that I don't remember them. I don't think any child wants to hear that they were forgotten, intentionally or not.”

“We will take it slow and explain what we can to them. They are your children so I am certain no hard feelings will remain if there are any.”

I took heart in Sesshomaru's encouraging words. Where I thought we would remain in awkward silence instead Sesshomaru talked of our children and things they had done while I was away. It seemed to amuse not only Lord Pacchiri and Lady Amira but Kouga as well.

“Ryusei has your talent with the little ones. He has kept the twins busy and entertained though they miss you something terrible, especially at bed time. You have spoiled them much and I am a poor stand in but between Ryusei and Chiouka they seem to have all of your stories memorized and tell them while I listen.”

I could picture the boy's young and full of energy and inquisitive as the played together and an image of this large and intimidating youkai male so proud and haughty looking sitting on their beds in an attempt to tell them bedtime stories brought a large smile to my face.

He had a light pink dusting his sculpted cheeks but he continued talking as the carriage continued moving. As he talked little memories returned and faces matched names and I simply enjoyed hearing his voice which seemed odd in its self.

We slowed and then came to a complete stop before a knock sounded on the door of the carriage.

“Lord Pacchiri, Lord Sesshomaru we have arrived at the castle gates,” called out the familiar voice of Lord Pacchiri's guard.

Sesshomaru stood up and gave me an odd look caught between needing to go and wanting to stay.

“Don't worry; we'll make sure he makes it through the castle gate safely. We'll see you inside the gate,” and even with Kouga's words Sesshomaru still looked hesitant but he opened the carriage door and stepped out.

He turned to give me a nod and softly spoke once more, “I'll see you inside.”

With those words he closed the door. It took a few minutes before the carriage once again began moving and as it did I saw three surprised and amused faces starring around at each other.

“I can say that in all the years I have known him that those are the most words I have ever heard him speak,” said Kouga with an awed grin.

“I can say the same. I wonder if you haven't had a good influence on Sesshomaru,” said Lord Pacchiri.

“I was quite surprised at his open display of affection. I dare say you are quite loved and missed little one,” said Lady Amira with a wide smile.

I blushed and muttered softly…”And the four children and one on the way wasn't proof enough.”

They laughed and I would have probably pouted a little at their amusement at my expense but we came to a stop then and the carriage door opened once more. I watched as Lord Pachhiri and Lady Amira stood and exited the carriage while I hung back a bit. I was helped into a standing position thanks to Kouga who stayed back with me while I fought my nerves.

“You shouldn't be nervous. I've seen you with children of all types; you seem to have a way with them. I have no doubt that everything will come as second nature and if it doesn't one step at a time mutt breath.”

I nodded and followed behind Kouga and was amazed to see that it was not Kouga who waited to lend me a helping hand down the steps but instead I saw the hand of Sesshomaru waiting for me so patiently. I took a deep breath and put my smaller hand in his which he gripped lightly as well as putting an arm under and around my other arm as he helped me step down.

Once I was on the paved entrance way I stared ahead and saw a small crowd, all of the heads covered in pale moonlight kissed hair and all of varying heights. Sesshomaru removed his arm from around my body but did not let go of my hand which he gave a reassuring squeeze as we walked towards those gathered.

The tallest and oldest looking male gathered there was handsome with the brightest smile I had ever seen. As he stood there dressed in a deep navy blue hakama set decorated in silver and gold stitching depicting the sun and moon with stars stitched here and there along the hem and over his shoulder which was now clad in armor similar to that of Sesshomaru's but in a shinier silver and steel.

His long silver tresses were pulled high at the back of his head in a ponytail leaving bangs and the sides to caress his face; the sides of his hair were nearly as long as my own as they cascaded down over his shoulders and chest. As I looked up and saw his indigo crescent moon hidden behind his long bangs and crimson markings along his high cheek bones I was certain this was my oldest, my Ryusei.

“Otoosan… no…Chichiue,” he smiled down at me which was amusing to see that I had a son nearly a foot taller than me. He looked me over and his eyes widened when he saw my belly and yet he still leaned in and gave me a big hug. His scent was the musk of a nearly mature dog youkai with hints of pine, cedar and a bit of citrus. As his arms encircled me I let go of Sesshomaru's hand and wrapped my arms around him in return as I allowed memories to flow through my mind of this once small child who had tried to be my protector.

Ryusei let go and I smiled widely, “I am glad that you've returned.”

“Me too,” and as the words left my mouth I knew them to be true.

He let go and stepped back and I saw a beautiful young woman her skin paler than my own with beautiful almond shaped gold eyes ringed in scarlet that seemed to make her eyes stand out even more than they already did. Her beautiful wavy hair was half pinned up; mostly the top and sides in a beautiful and ornate hair piece with citrine jewels that dangled along with pearls down the sides of her face matching her long pearl drop earrings, leaving the rest to fall down her back almost to her hips. Her bangs parted in the middle revealing the indigo moon in the middle of her forehead that seemed a bright contrast with the crimson around her eyes. She had also been blessed with small crimson lines along her fine cheek bones which seemed paler than those of her sires and older brothers.

I had seen the younger and more childish version of this beautiful woman in my memories but now she was far from those memories. She was intriguing and beautiful and had a soft smile that touched her eyes as well as her small pouty crimson lips. She seemed to glow in her pale pink and deep golden yellow kimono with its soft layers of white and its intricate gold and silver embroidery depicting flowers in bloom with butterflies in flight, which seemed to hug the soft beginnings of feminine curves.

“Chichiue…”

And as the soft words left her mouth I found myself with an arm full of the beautiful woman who I knew was my daughter.

“Chiouka...”

Her name was as beautiful as she was and I was amused to see that the scent that surrounded her was that of soft cherry blossoms in full bloom with a softer scent of cedar and citrus.

“You have become quite the beautiful woman,” and as I spoke those words she stepped back dabbing at her eyes and smiled brightly at me as she did so.

“We will talk more later, go see Hade and Hisso before they implode,” and she quickly embraced me once more before stepping back to stand next to her older brother.

And without even fully turning to face them I heard the loud choruses of “Chichiue” as two young boys wrapped themselves around my body; one from the left and one from the right. I almost stumbled but luckily I felt a steadying hand on my back keeping me firmly standing as the two held me tightly.

“We missed you whole bunches! We asked about you every day! Didn't we Hisso,” and as I looked down my right side into the golden eyes of my loud and excited Haderashi I felt my heart squeeze tightly and I felt foolish for having left, even if I couldn't recall the reason why.

I felt vigorous nodding on my left side and turned to see the sad golden eyes of my quiet and reserved Hissorashi.

Both had grown a bit taller in my absence and much like their older siblings they too were developing their crimson markings, both had the crimson around their eyes but they seemed to have mirrored markings along their cheekbones; Haderashi had two small thin ragged lines under his left eye and his brother Hissorashi had them under his right eye. Both also lacked the indigo moon, leaving their pale foreheads blank and visible since both seemed to have a widows peak which parted directly in the middle of their foreheads.

Their hair for the most part was pulled back and plaited in the back of their heads in thick braids that just came past their shoulders.

I patted their heads and held each in an arm against me until finally they pulled back wiping their eyes and sniffling. I smiled down at them and took in the sight of them in their matching pine green hakama with red, copper and silver dragon flies and birds in flight stitched along the hems.

“Come boys, why don't you lead your Chichiue into the castle and take him to his quarters while I see to our guests and their lodgings. I am sure a warm bath and a short rest would be most welcome after his travels.”

They grinned back at their sire and each took a hand and I allowed them to lead me through the doorway while they excitedly chatted; though I suppose I should say Haderashi excitedly chattered and every so often Hissorashi would say a short word or two and nod.

They lead me through hallways and up stairs and while they did so I looked around me and saw things I recognized and things I didn't.

We came to a doorway which was opened for us by young serving girls who smiled brightly at us and bowed happily as they stepped out of the way revealing a large wooden tub which was halfway filled with steaming hot water and was still being filled.

Hade and Hisso stayed with me until the tub was filled and then they tugged on my sleeves until I leaned over and I was amused and surprised as I was given a kiss on each cheek at the same time by my adorable and energetic sons before they ran out the door promising to see me at dinner.

I stared at the tub filled with steaming water and watched as a young woman with gentle brown eyes and soft wavy brownish red hair poured oils into the water before setting a pile of thick towels by the tub on a wooden stool before turning to add a few dried orange peels and rose buds to the water. She stood and smiled brightly in my direction, “Enjoy your bath InuYasha-sama. Call if you need anything. I am glad to see you are home.”

I watched her turn to leave and saw not one but two coppery red white tipped fox tails peeking out from under her kimono and a memory of seeing those tails sparked a memory.

“Reika…” at my soft whisper she turned around and smiled brightly.

“Yes InuYasha-sama?”

“Never mind, thank you.”

She smiled brightly and bowed, “No thanks necessary but you are welcome none the less InuYasha-sama,” and with that she left the room.

With nothing but the quiet around me I stripped down and eased myself into the comfort of the warm water as I washed and allowed my thoughts and memories intertwine.

To Be Continued…

Thank you all for reading and reviewing.

Writing to one of my favorite Japanese pop songs tonight…

“Yoru” by Vistlip. It's the ending theme song for Akatsuki No Yona. Such a pretty song and so nostalgic so I found it appropriate for this chapter.

More to come~!!!

Kat