InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Don't Cry ❯ Chapter 13 ( Chapter 13 )

Well it's been a while hasn't it? Here's the new chapter and sorry it's a short one.

Chapter Fourteen ( umm or 15 I don't really remember *blushes*): Hold Me

Kagome awoke with a yawn. She felt warm, so very warm, as if she was surrounded in a blanket of warmth. Kagome opened her brown eyes and blinked the sleep from them. She felt sore all over, as if she had run a marathon. That's when she noticed the heavy weight that lay draped across her stomach. Kagome blinked her eyes in confusion and looked down at her naked stomach. There was a strong tan arm flung across her stomach, wrapping around her almost possessively.

`What the. . . ` Kagome thought confused as she realized her back was pressed against something solid, something firm. `A chest. . .'

It didn't take long for Kagome to put two and two together. She was lying in her bed naked with Kouga (it HAD to be him) pressed back to chest. A sudden sense of dread fell over her as she relived the night before, all the moaning a grunting, the animal savagery. Hot tears of shame burnt her eyes. `What will Kouga think of me now?' she thought frantically.

Kagome was a good girl, and good girls just did not have random wild sex, not like she had. And especially not with their boyfriends BEFORE marriage. It was just wrong and Kagome felt violated. It wasn't that she didn't enjoy the events that had taken place the night before ( because god knows she did) it was just that Kagome had been planning on saving herself for marriage, for her husband and now she would never get that back. There was no way she could go back to being a virgin, go back to being pure.

`Oh god, what will mama think!' Kagome's conscience cried out to her. The tears that stung her eyes did not spill, she would not let them.

But Kagome's worst fear after all this was that Kouga would think her a slut, or someone to have whenever he wanted. Kagome loved Kouga and it broke her heart to think that he might look at her that way. A silent sob escaped Kagome's chest as s few tears fell from her eyes.

`I need to get away, I need to go. . .' Kagome thought as she bit her lip to keep from crying. But it was getting harder and harder, she had lost her virginity and she felt filthy.

Kouga awoke to the salty smell of tears and soft almost silent sobs. He blinked his blue eyes and looked at the girl who lay, trembling, in his arms. `Kagome is crying. . .' Kouga realized as the salty smell assaulted his sensitive nose.

"Kagome?" Kouga asked, drawing Kagome towards him, closer to his chest. Apparently this was the wrong thing to do because Kagome started to openly cry as she struggled against him.

"Kagome what's wrong!" Kouga demanded as he stroked her raven black hair. Kouga's heart shattered when Kagome cringed under his touch.

She was afraid of him.

`. . no . . .NO!!' Kouga thought fiercely. He would NOT loose his mate and future wife. With a restrained violence Kouga flipped Kagome onto her back and crouched over her, staring deeply, fiercely into her soft brown eyes that were now full of tears. So many emotions filled those beautiful brown eyes that Kouga had grown to love so much. Love, confusion, shame and . . . fear.

"Kagome" Kouga whispered as his eyes softened. He didn't know what was bothering her and he would give anything to make her pain go away, to wipe that look off her face.

That's when it hit Kouga, she was ashamed about what had happened between them the previous night, she was afraid that he would do it again.

Kouga gritted his teeth against the pain that griped his heart. Did she think it was a mistake? Would she hate him for taking her virginity?

"No" Kouga whispered. He loved Kagome with all his heart; she was the first woman who he had ever TRULY loved, the woman who taught him how to love. He would not, under any circumstances, let her go. No, the mark on Kagome's shoulder was proof enough for that.

Kouga let a growl spill from his throat as he stared down at the girl beneath him. There was an almost harsh look in his eyes as he met her eyes.

Kagome stopped crying when she heard Kouga growl down at her. Her eyes widened in fear and she stopped breathing for a second, it was as if time stood still in Kagome-Land.

"Stupid." Kouga growled fiercely, sending shivers of fear up her spine.

"Listen to me Kagome and listen well. You have nothing what so ever to be ashamed or afraid of, what happened last night was meant to be. It was beautiful and wonderful and natural. You are mine Kagome, now and forever. I don't know why you are afraid, but last night I marked you as my mate. You are my betrothed, my wife. You are mine. I know you are upset that you lost your virginity, that must be it, but you lost it to your mate, your husband. I will never let you go, never!" Kouga said deeply passionately.

More tears spilled from Kagome's eyes and she turned her head away so Kouga would not see her cry.

Kouga felt a sudden anger at his new mate's ignorance and he gripped her chin hard and turned her to face him.

"What is your problem Kagome! What did I do!?" Kouga all but shouted.

Kagome's bottom lip trembled as she drew in a deep calming breath of air.

"I-I don't want you to think . . ." Kagome trailed off.

"Don't want me to think what Kagome?"

Kagome took another deep breath. "I don't want you to think that I'm some sort of. . .of, slut some low down hussy that you can have whenever you want. Because I'm not! I'm not!!" Kagome shouted as she broke down into tears of anger and sadness.

Kouga reeled backwards as if he had been slapped. Is that honestly what she thought? That he would think of her like that?

A small smile came to his lips as he stared down lovingly into Kagome's eyes.

"Kagome, you know I could never think of you like that. I love you Kagome, and when you came to my bed you were a virgin, you were pure. Now why would I think of you as a slut?"

"Because-

"No! Be quiet woman! You are wrong! I could never think of you that way, you are my Kagome, my mate. And I love you." Kouga said with a fierce whisper.

Kagome blinked in shock and let out a small sigh of relief. But she still felt sad, tired and achy.

"K-Kouga?" She whispered.

Kouga stared at her for a second before answering.

"Yes"

"Can you hold me; j-just hold me, in your arms?" Kagome whispered tiredly.

Kouga smiled down at his mate and rolled off of her, pulling her into his lap. Kagome's head rested against his shoulder, her arms wrapped around his waist as she nuzzled her head into his neck. Kouga held Kagome to himself, his arms wrapping around her, rubbing her back in soothing circles.

"Just hold me. . ." Kagome whispered groggily as she fell into a light sleep.

"Of course . . . of course. . ." Kouga shushed silently as he held the sleeping Kagome in his arms.

"my mate. . ."

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Ok that chapter was short. What can I say I have writers block which I am finding to be a common occurrence with this fic. *sigh* but you readers are lucky, I cant even begin to imagine how I am going to update my other fanfic. This is serious! I honestly have the worst case of writer's block that I have EVER had in my LIFE! ARGHHHH!!!! I am so frustrated!

I know this chapter was short and I am really sorry. Hell, it probably wasn't good either, everything I write right now I am seriously doubting. But Kagome's opinion or, erm, conflict is exactly how I would feel in that situation. So if you don't like that she isn't all happy go lucky then . . . I DON'T CARE! GRRR! Lol. I'm just joking! Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. ANY WAY, the whole point of this A/N is to tell you guys how sorry I am that it took me this long to update and how sorry I am that the chapter was short and . . *cringes*. . .how sorry I am that I probably wont be able to update soon. This is a REALLY bad case of writers block, and I have never felt so frustrated in my life! I want to rip my hair out *looks at bald spot on head* Oops to late for that one. *sigh* so it will take me a while to update again, a week a month a few months, I just don't know. Thankyou all you guys who have stuck with my sorry azz, I know I can be a real pain sometimes and I appreciate all of ur support and reviews. Thankyou again, every one.

~Sarah