InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Elsewhere ❯ Chapter Fourteen ( Chapter 14 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

By: flowers

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha nor do I profit from this.

“Come to me now

And lay your hands over me

Even if it's lie

Say it will be alright

And I shall believe”

- Sheryl Crow, I Shall Believe

Chapter Fourteen

Red faded to gold and he trembled.

He sat up and slid her tenderly into his lap. She was fevered and breathing erratically. Blood was oozing it seemed from every inch of her skin. He would have sobbed for her, for her lost and innocence.

If he knew how.

Her pale skin grew cooler with every shattered breath and he could almost see the harbingers of death approaching. Without a thought he bit the fleshy part of his hand until the dark blood pooled against his lips then he placed it to hers. As blood filled her mouth she began choking and coughing.

Coughing was a wonderful sign. He sighed with a kind of relief he had never before experienced.

Suddenly she had a soft pink glow all about her. Her bloodstained face looked peaceful. Gathering her mangled form to him he flew with a swiftness he'd forgotten. Seconds swirled past with trees and buildings. Finally they were at his doorstep.

He burst through very relieved he had locked the house. Quickly he made way to his bathroom and laid her gently on the floor. After turning the faucet of the tub he returned to pick her up gingerly and placed her in the water, cradling her head . Hesitating briefly he used his free hand to remove the remnants of her tattered bathing suit. Hot waves of remorse hit him so strong his eyes blurred.

Finding an unused wash cloth to his left he grabbed it in haste and plunged it into the water pooling around her. Slowly he began to bathe her. Caressing her limbs like this was the last time he would have the chance, like bathing a body for a funeral wake crouching beside her naked as a babe himself. However her breathing became less labored and she snored gently.

As he started to bathe her thighs he felt as if he would vomit. He had tore her flesh and hurt her in ways he felt she would never recover from. He choked back the bile and turned his head.

He switched the shower head on and held her aloft, rinsing the blood and dirt away.

Hauling her out carefully he dried her with a discarded towel from the floor and carried her to the large bed to lay her down. Reaching in his closet he found a tee shirt and more underwear and dressed her.

He remembered himself and quickly returned to the shower left running to step in. Resting the top of his head against the shower wall he clenched his jaw. She may be slipping into darkness as he stood there. He rinsed himself, jumped out and dried himself off with a fresh towel.

Returning to the bed he almost gasped. The wounds on her face and legs were all but gone. With a quick test of the air he could tell she was still bleeding and he didn't have to guess from where. All at once nausea and desire hit him and he wondered at the monster living inside his veins. Disgust won over and he hung his head. She would live but what kind of life would it be now haunted with fear and guilt.

He dressed himself quickly and went for the phone, he needed to get something for her to eat but he tensed. Her mother would have to be contacted, it was already dark outside. He couldn't possibly tell her the truth. This would be simple enough if the girl were Youkai and it had been two hundred years earlier.

How could he have been so careless? To entertain the thought of letting the situation escalate. Thinking he could handle it, thinking for all the world it was innocent enough.

Innocent.

His animal baseness had corrupted the girl and himself. He had done the despicable. The one thing in his life he had promised himself time after time…

He shook these thoughts from his head. Debasing himself was the least of the situation. He had a very hurt and very scared child in his bed.

Child.

What had he done? The most despicable act was tearing this girl from her innocent bliss. Ripping the last bit of her childhood from her. The one thing he had treasured most about her.

Leaning to the wall for support he closed his eyes. Eventually she would have performed the last act that would release her from her childish world but never this violently, never with fear or anything but tender joy. With a simple human that would cherish her as she should be.

He snatched the phone.

Relaying some far fetched lie about too much sake and a drunken slumber on his couch to her mother he clenched his fists but she accepted it. She then asked his name and number, he surrendered both. He made a call next door for a tray of `human' food to be left at the doorstep. Without question it was agreed.

Pacing toward his front door he wondered how it had stayed on it's hinges. Suddenly he remembered Tensaiga and cursed himself. Silently he rushed out of the splintered door closing it behind him as best he could and made haste toward the sea.

She slipped into consciousness and observed her surroundings. She was in his bed. So it hadn't been a dream!? Trying to move she found her body didn't reply. Fear gripped her then subsided as her arm rose shakily. This action pained her chest a bit and she let it fall back to her side feeling relaxed even with the slight pain in her chest and…

Realization slowly crept in. She found tears were sliding down her cheeks of their own accord. It had been both the most wonderful and fearful experience of her life. She knew he would be furious.

But wait, she didn't do anything. She didn't seduce or persuade him in any way. Could it be that he feels the same way? Dismissing this thought she decided that somehow his `instinct' took him over. In a sane state of mind he wouldn't possibly feel anything for her but…

Tears threatened again. She wouldn't be sweet or innocent in his mind anymore. Nothing about her would please him. This was an awful mess. She shifted a bit and pain shot up her back crawling straight to her head. She felt the cool fingers of sleep take her mind and she surrendered willingly.

He felt a sudden sadness pulse in his mind. He knew it was her. They were joined slightly in spirit by the blood exchange. She must have woke to an empty and dark house in pain mentally and physically. He was on his way back but he cursed himself for being too slow. He sped on finding himself at the door and threw it open, tossed Tenseiga in a corner, and hurried to her bedside.

She was blessedly asleep. He knew she would be wracked with pain, guilt, and fear for many days from now. He expected it, however he couldn't prepare for how it would effect his mind.

Reassuring himself that if he hadn't shared his blood she might not be alive yet he still found regret. He felt an intense sorrow as he thought that after this, she might not want to live. He had seen this many times. Demon-raped humans take their own life.

But…

But after all it had been consensual. Stupid foolish human girl. She had danced around a fire without knowing its power to harm. Harm wasn't the word for it he thought while surveying the damage. But she was quickly healing and even some of the scars were gone.

At least he gave her body quick healing and dulled the physical pain. She began to move slightly and a moan escaped her lips.

“Sesshou…” he caught the syllable and let it sink in, confused. She didn't say this with fear or guilt. His heart lightened. Her mind wasn't wracked with pain and fear after all. Well at least in her dream but he was apparently in her dreams even now. And no fear. This was very satisfying and disturbing all at once.

He moved closer and took her hand. She must think this was her fault, finding no fault in him. So much like Rin. He sat with his stone-set face staring at her with wonder. Resilience and loyalty, so much like an InuYoukai. Maybe all wasn't lost. He would tell her the truth when she woke. Truth like he had never shared with anyone. That this was completely his fault.

She floated mentally through many dreams and memories. The first time she kissed Inuyasha. Staring happily into the feudal sky filled with stars after a particularly harsh battle. Meeting Sesshoumaru on her lawn. Being with him by the sea, his sea. These moments played out vividly before her eyes.

She felt a warm hand in hers and smiled while opening her eyes slightly. Sesshoumaru was sitting beside her and his face was unreadable. She sighed deeply. He was angry.

“You are awake,” he stated with more emotion in his voice than she could decipher.

“Yeah,” her voice was weak, she was very thirsty.

“Be still, I will get water,” he ordered and soon enough a cool cup was at her lips. She drank very deeply and felt her voice come back to her.

“What time is it?” she asked, thinking of her mother and how worried she must be.

“It is late, I called your home. Do not worry,” he replied. Was he reading her mind or something? He didn't sound very angry. She started to sit up and he was at her side helping her in a flash.

“I'm okay, I can sit up,” she admonished secretly loving this attention. Why was he acting like a mother hen? Suddenly she felt very guilty and afraid. A fear that was purely for never seeing him again after he returned her to her home. He flinched back and sat on the end of the bed. He was unreadable as usual. She pulled her knees up and felt tears forming.

“Please, do not be afraid. I will never hurt you again,” he said. Her tears began falling with that remark. He was blaming himself, she knew it.

“I'm so sorry…” was all she could manage. He looked at her with his deep golden pools, so much emotion under the surface. She wanted to reach it but knew she never could.

“Do not apologize for something that is not your fault,” he said wanting to reach out and take the small human in his arms but he refrained. This would only complicate things. In her mind and his own.

“Then whose fault is it…” she whispered, mostly to herself.

“This is my fault. I should have controlled myself. I should have also schooled you in the ways of Youkai...” he couldn't bring himself to say the word. It wasn't simply a word anymore, it was a monstrous entity. “Hurting you in this… way was never my intention. If I would have been of sound mind…” he let his words falter. This was one of the few times words didn't come to him easily.

“I have put fear in your mind and body. I have never felt so… wrong until now,” he finished. This wasn't making sense. He should have gone over this conversation in his mind but he couldn't bring himself to earlier. Emotion was not his forte in life.

She reached out and laid her hand on his. “I'm not afraid of you Sesshoumaru,” she smiled at him through tears. The girl yet again confused and baffled him. She should be shrinking back and begging to die.

He thought at one time he knew the human mind. Now he was very sure he hadn't even scratched the surface. No, not the human mind, her mind. Her mind was like the sea. Tempestuous on the outside, calm and deep within.

He felt himself becoming a bit angry. Angry at himself for worrying about her mental state of health to the point it made him physically ill. Her mind was strong and firm. It didn't reflect her fragile human state in the least.

“Sesshoumaru,” he almost shuddered as his name fell from her lips with a kind of familiarity that may have been only a figment of his imagination. “I have to use the bathroom,” she stated and started to get out of bed almost falling to the floor but he grabbed her.

He helped her to the bathroom door then swung it open and waited there for a bit but she balanced herself against the door frame and stalked inside. He closed the door behind her waiting for her sob as the realization of her wounds came to her.