InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Ever After ❯ Chapter 1 ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters, no matter how I may wish otherwise. This story is written for pleasure and entertainment. I make no money from this (but if you would like to give me some…)

 

Authors Note: This is an overhaul of my previous version of this chapter. Now that I have finished the bulk of my freelance work, I am trying to get this written. However, there were quite a few corrections I wanted to make on chapters 1 & 2 before pressing forward.

 

I hope you all like the changes, and expect chapter 3 to be out soon. Maybe not this week, as I have a lot to do, and I am only now getting it down on the computer, but maybe as a late Christmas present (for those of you that are enjoying this story).

 

 

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When she was six, he drew her out from the land of the dead. She lifted her checkered yukata and frolicked after him through the plains of Musashi as he stalked his enemy and discovered the secrets of his father's legacy, Tenseiga. She was steadfast and true. Obedient, if not a bit rambunctious in her youth, and he enjoyed her presence and her laughter. When he thought he had lost her to the Master of Hell, it had taken everything in him not to cry out in agony. When his mother returned her to him, it took everything in him not to cry out in joy.

 

When she was eight, she learned her kanji. He asked Jaken to take a letter for him, a formality pertaining to the birth of his brother's offspring, and she watched entranced as the little imp made his brush dance across the page, putting meaning into brushstrokes. She pestered him constantly for a year about it, and finally he sat her down with Jaken, who would teach her every night before sleep would claim them. He had always let her do as she wished.

 

When she was twelve, she asked for her first kimono. It was then; he realized that she was growing up. A part of him resisted this, knowing all too soon she would move on with her life. She would marry and have her own, human family. He would be relegated to a distant memory, a fanciful dream. He eventually acquiesced, for she was persistent and quickly growing out of her new yukata, and brought her a chocolate, silk kimono covered in tiny pink cherry blossoms. He found that she was hard to deny.

 

When she was fourteen, she shed the rambunctious nature of her youth. She had spent a week with his brother's wife, learning about her blooming womanhood. She grew reserved with her new knowledge, but lost none of her cheerful nature. He had feared that she would leave him then. She was old enough to marry if she wished. She had become beautiful, with raven hair and sun kissed skin, and he could not help but notice the lingering stares of the village boys. However, she left with him when she had learned all she needed, and never turned to look behind her.

 

When she was fifteen, he realized he was in love with her. The thought had struck him so suddenly that he was not sure when his affection had grown beyond that of friendship and into this new…dimension. Certainly, she had grown up beautiful. Certainly, he had grown fond of her companionship. She stood by him in all tides, good or ill, and brightened his little corner of the universe…but never before had he felt lust towards her.

 

Upon discovering what it was he felt for this girl, an almost immediate backlash of shame assaulted him. More than her tender age, more than the fact that he raised her, she was human. He had condemned his father for his human concubine on more than one occasion, had let his father go alone to die at a mortal's hands because of his staunch hatred of the woman. Sesshomaru had no doubt, in a distant pit of hell; his father's raucous laughter could be heard throughout the netherworld.

 

For a time, things became uncomfortable between them. He could barely bring himself to look her in the eye, embarrassed by the emotion that this fragile, human female produced in him. He feared that she could never feel the same way towards him. After all, he had practically raised the girl, and her rejection would cause him more pain than his missing left limb. Sesshomaru had never been one to express his feelings, or much of anything for that matter, but this situation frustrated him beyond words.

 

He was terribly inexperience in this sort of thing. Never in his life had he trusted someone enough to draw so close to them. His life had been a path of conquest before he met her. A life of battles and blood and brutality. A life of honor and duty and pride. It left very little time for romantic notions. Before this point, Sesshomaru never knew he had such tender feelings in him.

 

She, of course, noticed the subtle change in his demeanor. He would avert his eyes when she drew up to walk next to him. He would increase his pace slightly, until she would fall behind with Jaken and Ah Un. It was as frustrating as it was confusing. Even more puzzling, he would depart for the early hours of the evening, until Jaken and herself were asleep. She would awake in the morning to find him standing stoically, looking into the sunrise. The moment he would notice her, he would toss a rock at Jaken and tell them in his deep, monotone voice, “Let's go.”

 

Several months passed in this fashion. Finally, at her wits end, Rin endeavored to discover what incurred this change in her most beloved yokai.

 

Jaken began traveling with Sesshomaru long before my birth. Perhaps he will understand what strange mood has overcome our lord.

 

Their group had come to a stop for the evening, as per their routine. Jaken used his staff to start a fire in the wood that Rin had collected for the evening. Ah Un dozed lightly under the leafy boughs of a maple. Sesshomaru stalked off into the night, under the pretense of securing the area, despite the fact that most of the yokai in the land were at peace since the demise of Naraku.

 

When Rin felt that Sesshomaru had been gone for a sufficient amount of time, and had traveled far away enough so that his sensitive hearing would not allow him to eavesdrop, she turned to Jaken. Said imp was thoroughly engrossed in his evening meal, slurping and chewing in a rather undignified manner.

 

Really, it's a wonder I have any manners at all, Rin thought with a wry smile as a trail of juice dripped its way down Jaken's chin.

 

“Jaken-sama,”

 

“Hrm-rm…what is it girl?” Jaken sputtered through his mouthful of mushroom.

 

Rin twirled her spitted fish between her fingers and wondered how she should go about questioning her longtime friend and caretaker.

 

“Hasn't Lord Sesshomaru seemed…somewhat distant lately?”

 

Jaken gave her a shrewd look, and turned back to his supper.

 

“Our lord keeps his own council,” was all he said, and continued munching loudly.

 

Rin fell silent. She wasn't sure how to express her distress over the situation. It was not like Sesshomaru to ignore her in such a manner. They would often speak quietly when they had stopped for the evening. Well, she would speak, and he would listen. Occasionally, he would tell her stories of his youth, of his great and terrible father and his proud and aloof mother. Sometimes, she would sing the silly songs that she had made up when he was off on business that she could not attend. He would smile that smile of his that was true, and only in his eyes.

 

She missed their time together…He had grown very close to her heart and she had grown to love him. The whole situation made her sad and oddly uncomfortable.

 

What if he realized my true feelings for him?

 

It was an understandable concern. She never deemed it necessary to hide her feelings for him. However, her thoughts towards him had slowly been changing over the years. Where once she saw a friend and companion, almost a foster older brother, she now saw a man. Now, Rin was not an idiot. She knew full well what Sesshomaru was. She had seen his true form on a few occasions, and it never ceased to awe her. This was why she knew that he would not appreciate her new opinion of him. He was a terrible inuyokai, a mononoke. She doubted he could ever find such a plain, human girl-child attractive. She had come to that conclusion long ago, when she knew what it was for a woman to love a man, and she was content to simply stand by his side. She valued their friendship, and doubted she could love any other as she loved him. None could compare.

 

After they had finished their supper, and had bedded down for the night, Rin was still awake. She looked up through the dark canopy above her, as the wind rustled the boughs gently. She listened to the light snoring of Jaken a few feet away, punctuated by the occasional grunt and snort of Ah Un. She wished…She wished that she knew how to discover the reason behind Sesshomaru's current mood. The stars peeked through the leaves above her. They winked and gave no answers.

 

Rin drifted in and out of sleep for a time, until she heard a light rustle from the bush, and the familiar sound of Sesshomaru's light footfalls. She feigned sleep, unsure if she was ready to confront him about her feelings. She attempted to breath deeply and evenly, but it would seem that her lord was difficult to fool.

 

“You are still awake,” he said quietly. His voice was rich and deep. Rin felt it rumble through her bones.

 

Rin opened her eyes, and peered askew at him from her palette. He had settled himself near Ah Un, resting against the thick trunk of the maple.

 

“I couldn't sleep,” she replied, and it was true enough…though she refrained mentioning that he was the reason for her restlessness.

 

“Hn.”

 

Deeper in the wood, a cicada buzzed from his tree, and crickets chirped their evening song, but their little clearing was silent. The air hung heavy with words unsaid

 

Somewhere, in a distant part of her mind, the part that was not particularly annoyed with him and fearful of the confrontation she knew was coming, she realized that Sesshomaru was a beautiful thing. The moonlight glistened on his white hair and kimono, giving him an otherworldly glow. His eyes were piercing, an iridescent gold in the soft light. A part of her longed to touch him, longed to tell him how much she loved him, would always love him. Not as a father, or a brother and far more than a friend…

 

But she could never bring herself to do it. And right now, she was so frustrated; she was on the verge of tears. At least he was finally talking to her, albeit in a monosyllabic fashion. Maybe she could make him understand. She realized that he would never feel towards her as she did him, but she always wanted to be with him.

 

No matter what…her heart cried out.

 

“Lord Sesshomaru…” she began timidly. He turned his attention from the dark forest and faced her, his eyes as cold as she had ever seen them. She wondered what he was steeling himself against.

 

“Lord Sesshomaru…have I…have I done something to offend you?”

 

He blinked stupidly at her.

 

“Why would you consider such a thing?”

 

Rin sat up slowly, as if afraid to spook him. She began absentmindedly picking at the hem of her sleeves; too curious to stop from asking, but too nervous to continue.

 

“It's just,” she looked up briefly from her stitching to find him staring at her with an unnerving intensity, and immediately resumed her work.

 

“Just…” he supplied.

 

Sesshomaru could barely contain the nervous knot that had developed in the pit of his stomach.

 

Sesshomaru, by his very nature, was a terrible liar. He could refrain from mentioning, he could even exaggerate the truth a bit, but he could never flat out lie…to anyone…especially her. If his innocent, little Rin ever realized the kind of thoughts he had been entertaining about her as of late…he would lose her. He would rather endure a lifetime of wanting, as long as he could be near her.

 

“You have been distant as of late, my lord.” Rin stated, and Sesshomaru gave himself a little mental shake.

 

Rin looked up at him. His silence was deafening, and she wasn't sure how to continue. For a split second she thought to drop the conversation entirely, but she knew that it would solve nothing.

 

This needs to be said…she thought to herself. And he will never mention it, that is not his way. He will simply ignore it, even if that means ignoring me.

 

She thought of all the years she had spent with him. She thought of their quiet conversations, his steadfast protection of her, and she pressed on.

 

“Lord Sesshomaru, we are friends, aren't we?” she asked, a hint of exasperation to her voice.

 

His eyes widened marginally in surprise. He turned his head away from her, to hide the slight color that came into his cheeks, and tried to think of the last time he blushed.

 

“Lord Sesshomaru?” She could not stop the waver from filtering into her voice.

 

Why doesn't he answer me?

 

“I suppose,” he replied quietly into the night.

 

“You suppose?”

 

Sesshomaru turned towards her again.

 

By heaven, she is lovely. He thought wildly.

 

Her hair spilled like ink over her shoulders, framing her heart-shaped face. Her eyes…her dark almond eyes were fathomless, but sad. He could never bear to see her sad. He realized, in his foolishness, he had hurt her in an attempt to hide his feelings. Now that hurt was quietly spilling over her cheeks.

 

Words had never been his forte. They were such slippery, useless things, as easily taken back as they were given. He was so bad at this, but now…now a part of him wished he were a more eloquent man, if only for Rin.

 

“Rin.” His voice was breathy, barely a whisper.

 

Rin looked up from her mangled hem, trying her best to hold in her tears. His eyes softened marginally, his mouth pursed.

 

“We are friends,” he said.

 

Then, she smiled.

 

Sesshomaru would be a liar if he did not admit to himself that it brought him no small joy to see her smile. He rarely smiled, and when he did, it would only forebode great destruction. It was not the habit of a dog to show his teeth to anyone other than an enemy. However, Rin's smile brought only a warm feeling to his chest. It held no malice, no ulterior motives, just happiness. That word-happiness-was as foreign to him as smiling in joy, yet Rin had brought both to his life from the moment he met her.

 

She rose from her palette and moved to sit next to him, startling him slightly from his reverie. As she settled beside him with a rustling of silk, he realized that he had not been this close to her in months. Her proximity was making him feel like a thousand moth yokai were fluttering and tearing apart his insides.

 

“Why have you not been speaking to me?” she asked, looking up at him with those dark, innocent eyes. She laid her hand lightly on his, and he was very tempted in that moment to kiss her.

 

Restraint, he chanted to himself.

 

“I have…” he turned away from her again in an attempt to gather himself. He was so ridiculously nervous.

 

“I have not meant to neglect you,” he whispered hoarsely.

 

Rin cocked her head to the side, confused by his tone.

 

“But…what is wrong? Have I done something to anger you?”

 

“You have done nothing wrong,” he answered.

 

Her gaze remained troubled.

 

Sesshomaru realized in that moment that, if he did not admit his feelings for her now, he doubted he ever would. Not until she was old, and it would be too late. She was so painfully mortal, and her time with him would be a blink in his many years. Even if she did not leave him now, he knew he would lose her eventually to the steady march of time. Was his pride worth forgoing the joy that this girl brought him?

 

No, he suddenly realized as he looked into her open expression, tracing the delicate curve of her jaw to her soft lips with his eyes, it is not.

 

He had come to a decision. He could not continue to keep her with him and ignore her. To do so would not only be foolish, but also unfair to the both of them. She was right; they were friends. Sesshomaru never had a true friend in his life. Jaken, perhaps, could also be called a friend, but Rin…Rin was different. He had to tell her. It had taken him a great deal of time to come to terms with how he felt towards her, and now that he had finally accepted these emotions that she invoked in him, he did not want to look back on their time together and feel regret. Whatever her choice may be…

 

The silence stretched on. It seemed like Sesshomaru was struggling with something. It was almost startling; Rin had never seen indecision in him before.

 

Soon, however, it passed. He turned to face ahead. For a moment, he said nothing, his expression unreadable.

 

“Rin.”

 

Rin jumped, and looked wide-eyed at him.

 

He seems different all of a sudden, the thought, though strange and seemingly irrelevant, brought her some measure of comfort.

 

“Yes, Lord Sesshomaru.”

 

“I…” he stopped and sighed audibly, “I…”

 

“My Lord?” Rin felt her fear bubble up again. It was not like Sesshomaru to stumble over his own words. It was even less like him to sigh.

 

Perhaps he is ill…do youkai get ill?

 

Sesshomaru took Rin's smaller hand in his own, brushing his thumb over her palm. Rin was dumbfounded, and slightly afraid. This…this was not like Sesshomaru at all.

 

He was staring at their coupled hands intensely, as if trying to divine a great truth from them. Then he looked up at her. Something flashed across his eyes that Rin had never seen before. It made her breath hitch. It was sad and beautiful and frighteningly intense, and Rin had a feeling that it would change what was between them forever.

 

Before she could react, he leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers. It was light, chaste, but lingering. A strange tingle worked its way strait up her spine, and she resisted the urge to shiver. When he pulled away, that strange look was still there, but coupled with what seemed like fear. Rin could barely think, let alone discern what had just occurred.

 

Was he…was that…

 

“L-lord Sesshomaru?” her voice sounded strange in her ears, distant.

 

“I…do not expect you to feel the same way,” he said, turning away from her, “you may…reject me, if that is your wish.”

 

Reject him? Rin thought incredulously.

 

Rin pulled her hand from his, and for a moment, Sesshomaru thought he felt his heart drop strait to his stomach. Then, there was a feather light touch at his cheek, and she was turning his face towards her. She leaned in, and pressed her lips against his in return, just as chastely, but also just as passionately. When she pulled back, her eyes were shining, and she was smiling at him.

 

He loved that smile…