InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Fading Away ❯ Fading Away ( One-Shot )

This is a bittersweet oneshot that a picture by Druihdgirl, on mediaminer, gave me an idea for. Please enjoy.

This is the first time I'll be writing in 1st person.

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Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, and if the story does end like this, I'll be glad I don't.

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Fading Away

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"Inuyasha..." I faltered there as I felt my sore throat constrict. "Are you- are you-?" Curling my slim fingers into a tight fist, I cursed myself. I couldn't do it. I couldn't ask him if this was what he really wanted.

And worse yet, I felt that familiar prick in my stormy blue eyes, that stinging of my nose, that tugging in my chest. I was going to cry, and I felt ashamed.

"Kagome..." I flashed my gaze up to look into his worried golden pools. He flinched when he saw my tears, just like he always did. I found it unbearably sweet that that was his weakness. That he couldn't stand to see a woman cry.

One of his clawed hands reached out towards me, probably in hopes to comfort me, but I stepped back, causing the offending appendage to fall short of contact.

Screwing my eyes shut, damning the fact that I was acting immature, I whispered harshly, "No, Inuyasha! You can't! I wont...I wont let you!"

He turned his silver head away from me and growled. "Kagome, this is how it's going to end. I'm sorry," his rough voice cracked on the word, not being used to speaking it.

"No! Don't say 'sorry'. If you truly were, you wouldn't be doing this!" I screeched, anger covering up my sadness. "…Please?" I begged pitifully, the next second.

Inuyasha rubbed the heels of his hands onto his eyes. We'd been discussing this for a long time, too long if you asked me. He was running out of arguments, but then again…so was I.

"Kagome," he started off slowly, as if talking to a child. And that's probably what it felt like to him.

"No," I said firmly again.

"Just stop it!" he snapped, his paper-thin patience reaching the breaking point. My face contorted in a wince at his tone, and he quickly regretted it. "I'm sorry, it's just...we've been through this!"

"Why?" My voice cracked as I looked up into his amber orbs. "Why, Inuyasha. Why?"

"'Why' what?" He glowered as he starred down his nose at me.

He wouldn't admit it, but I could tell he was just as scared about this as I was.

"Why do you always have to be the hero? Why do you always have to the knight in shining armor? Why do you always have to be right?! Because, you know what? You're not right. Not this time!" I openly shouted at him. I heard my voice echo back at me from the surrounding trees of his forest.

The forest where we'd first met.

And just behind him stood the tree where we had made that first encounter.

"Because," he stressed the word and cleared his throat uncomfortably. He'd always been bad with words.

So instead, he grabbed my hand and began to haul me off to the Go-shinboku tree.

I starred numbly at his large, callused, clawed hand that covered my own tiny one. Any joy I might have felt in the last two years for this gesture...it just wasn't there any more.

I knew where we were going.

He paused in front of the massive tree. "That's why," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion.

It seemed like eternity before I could lift my azure gaze to what I knew was the inevitable.

Four graves sat in front of me. The slabs of marble were perfectly rounded and smooth, almost beautifully so. Two were large and held the carved names of their owners. The second two were small, fit for the tiny bodies that lay beneath them.

This is where they rested.

Sango, Miroku, Shippou, and even Kirara. All of them were laid to rest at the base of 'our' tree.

Shaking my head slowly as the tears streaked my face unbidden, I took a shuddering breath.

This was why.

"Inuyasha..." I tried again. I knew I sounded younger than my seventeen years, but it didn't matter, as long as he listened to me. "You...can't..."

"Kagome," He whipped around to glare down at me. But his yellowed eyes held no menace, just desperation.

He'd been trying for three months to get me to agree.

Three months I've listened to him beg but I refused to listen.

Three months since our friends had fallen on the same battlefield as our enemy.

And what was scaring me?

I was starting to wear down. I was out of witty comebacks. I no longer held any bite. I was just so tired! So exhausted...so drained of everything.

"Kagome...they meant more to this world! I don't have a place here. I did my duty, Naraku is dead and Kikyou has been laid to rest. But I have no more to do here!" He was shaking in rage at his own destiny. "If I don't do it...it'll just start all over again."

"You do have a place! With me!" Believe it or not, I had no problems saying these words. I'd confronted myself for my love for him years ago. I'd kissed him once to save his life, and had wished to do it again so many times since. He'd never admitted to anything, and I knew I never expected him to. I'd done my duty. The jewel was whole and I'd stayed by his side the entire time.

Sorry to say, but he didn't listen to my plea.

"Kagome! Will you stop?" His normally cocky voice was reduced to a desperate whisper. "You'll be better off! You don't need me! You'll be better with them...not me."

"No," I sniffed. "I loved them! But I need you!"

"Kagome!" He was just short of clamping his claws over his ears. It bothered him to hear me say I needed him, I could tell. He didn't need to hear the words to know that I loved him, although he probably hid the knowledge from his own self.

"There has to be another way!" My mind raced desperately. "We don't need to do it this way! I can just wish for them back, back with us. Kohaku would love it, he's been lost since he survived and his sister didn't. And Miroku could go through his promise and marry Sango! The Shikon will grant my wish."

"It will," Inuyasha relented and I breathed a sigh of relief. But he wasn't done yet. "The wish isn't entirely pure, though. I've told you this. Although it may seem selfless, it isn't. There is just that tinge of selfishness in there. The jewel would become tainted, again, and it'd still be here. We'd have our friends back, but you would have tainted the jewel. Then you'd never be able to purify it yourself."

"But why this, why?"

Inuyasha closed his eyes and took a deep breath. It still took him awhile to calm down, old habits die hard.

"Because it's the only way." He said finally, simply, quietly.

"What about the Tensaiga?" I asked, the sword finally reaching my mind.

Inuyasha gulped visibly. "You saw what happened. Sesshoumaru, h-he just jumped in front of Rin! He didn't stand a chance, and neither did Rin once her protector was gone. He's dead, Kagome, and with him so is the knowledge of how to use the Sword of Healing." `Damn Naraku' I could almost hear his mind adding.

"But you're his brother!" I shouted. "Why can't you use it? Why can't you make it work?"

Inuyasha's sigh depressed me. He sounded as tired as I felt. Tired of everything. Tired of everyone around us dying and leaving us alone. Tired of the world itself, and the whole unfairness about it.

"Get the jewel, Kagome, this is how it will end." He commanded, his 'leader' voice still there.

Feeling fresh tears trail down my face I yanked out the damn jewel. "I have it with me, like I always do." The purple sphere chimed when it connected with the crystal chain around my neck.

"Good. Now do it."

"But…" I took a deep breath. I couldn't do it.

I couldn't wish for the ending of his life. Even if it was going to a good cause.

I couldn't wish for his life to be sacrificed so that my other friends could come back to me.

The thought of denying him and sacrificing myself crossed my mind, but was quickly crossed out. As odd as that sounds, there had to be some selfishness in there too. More than likely the fact that I would be riding the world of me so that my love could live.

"Now." Inuyasha stated firmly while watching me closely.

I glanced up at him, savoring his image. I memorized every part about him. It was a good last scene of him.

His sword at his side while the sun set behind him. His silver hair had a golden halo from the dying star's rays. His golden eyes were deeper and he seemed, in that moment, like he was wiser beyond his years. Like he'd been to hell and back.

And he had been.

He closed his eyes loosely as he waited for me to do my job, to wish his life to flow into those that were buried nearby.

For him to simply just fade away from my life.

Closing my streaming eyes…I did.

I wished that he would be allowed to leave this world to allow the others to come back.

As cocky and arrogant as he was, he was just as brave. And I loved him for it.

When my eyes opened I dully recognized that the solid jewel that had been clasped in my fingers moments before was simply now only a cloud of pale pink light.

All my attention was on him.

On my Inuyasha.

He smirked cockily back at me and I couldn't stop a small smile tweaking my lips.

The jewel was gone, the balance between demons and human kind leveled out, and Midoriko could rest in peace. The wish had finally purified the jewel, and it was gone.

And all because of one cocky, egotistical, arrogant, jerk of a hanyou who refused to let the day end without being a hero.

Taking a few steps forward, my bare feet padded softly over the dirt ground. My kimono swayed in the light spring breeze. My school uniform lay in tatters at old Kaede's hut and I hadn't been back home since Naraku's defeat to grab a new one.

Standing toe to toe with him, I lifted my eyes up to lock with his.

"Do you know what today is?" He asked suddenly.

He sniggered at my clueless look and I had to resist the urge to 'sit' him. Too bad I had gotten rid of that rosary a few months before the final battle. "What?" I whispered, afraid to ruin our last moment together.

"Your birthday." He smirked and my breath caught as he reached forward to tuck a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "The day we met."

"And you tried to kill me," I added dryly.

He snickered, "Sorry 'bout that."

"Hn. I got over it."

I gasped as I finally took a real look at him. Glancing down at his bare feet I felt my stomach twist in knots. "No..."

"What?" he asked before following my gaze downward. "Oh."

His flesh was barely noticeable and was transparent enough to see the bright green grass beneath him. The horrible fading effect was starting low and working itself upward.

"Inuyasha...You're really leaving?"

He shrugged nonchalantly but I could see the tiny spark of fear in his eyes. Those gorgeous eyes of his. "I guess."

"You know I love you, right?" I asked simply.

He surprised me. He smirked cockily and coolly stated, "I know. I've always know." And then, without any of the hesitance or the meekness I'd always imagined, he replied simply. "And I feel the same way. I love you too."

Not wanting to waste time gaping, as I'd often thought I would have, I smiled. One of my bright, happy-go-lucky, perfectly sweet smiles. "Thank you."

"Feh," he stuck his hands up his sleeves and looked towards the graves.

The fading was worse.

I couldn't see any of him below the chest.

Taking a deep breath I looked up at him. My mouth twisted and my eyes pooled over. "I'm going to miss you, you know? You big idiot. You should have just stayed...we could have been happy. We could have lived in the village, even without Kaede. Bless her lost soul. They do accept you there."

Inuyasha flashed me a look and muttered something. "You know you wouldn't have done that."

I scowled.

He was right, I wouldn't have left my friends to stay in the 'great beyond'. I would have done everything in my power to allow them to live out their too short lives.

But Inuyasha had beaten me to it.

He'd found the solution. The solution to everything.

I snorted quietly.

That jackass. He had all the dumb luck.

"You won't forget me?" he asked suddenly, that very puppyish look gracing his perfect, his handsome, features.

I rolled my eyes at him No chance of that happening. "I wouldn't forget you for the world. I'll miss you everyday. You won't forget me?"

He looked absolutely disgusted by the idea and I was appalled when I found my self laughing at his expression. It looked like he'd bitten into a lemon.

"I'd rather kiss the ground my brother walks on before I did that," he announced.

I snickered. Little to no chance of that happening.

It was horrible. Almost all of his body was nothing but a simple sheen of color on reality. Like a ghost...like a spirit.

I could only see his face now. That face that I'd met two years ago on this very day. The face that I've yearned to wake up to. The face that I'd wanted to kiss everyday...

He narrowed his eyes as if reading my mind.

"Don't say goodbye, Kagome." He seemed to be trying to make an effort to sound at least half way reasonable. "I'll wait. I swear I will, I'll wait till the end of eternity. As long as you come back to me. Remember, you did say you'd stay by my side 'forever'!"

I nodded, my eyes never leaving his.

Leaning forward and downward till our foreheads touched, he whispered something. "I'll see you soon."

And then he kissed me. It was light, and airy. Just simply sweet and I nearly cried out in alarm as I felt his solid lips disappear. His smooth flesh was only a memory now.

Inuyasha, my Inuyasha, was gone.

Even when I could still feel the warmth of his finger on my face, from when he'd tucked the hair behind me ear.

And now I'd wait. I'd wait for the magic to take effect and to be reunited with my friends that I'd lost not long ago.

And soon, I'd be reunited with my love.

Even after he just faded away.

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THE END

The second part is titled `Beyond Life and Death'.