InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Father ❯ Father ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I shamelessly use Rumiko Takahashi's characters for my (and my readers') amusement. Thank you, Takahashi-san for such a wonderful world you've created. And now, here I go to screw it all up.

 

Notes: This story contains spoilers for InuYasha movie 3 and through at least episode 47 (manga issue 17). Beyond that, it's speculation, rewriting and the violation of canon.

 

Genre: Angst, Tragedy
Rating: R
Codes: none (due to perspective. Canon relationship remain intact, but this is not a story about a romantic relationship)
Feedback: Review to feed my muse. But please keep your flames to warm yourself.

 

 

Father

 

Izayoi ran from the burning building and Sesshomaru stepped forward to watch his father battle the human who had attacked the woman he loved. The human was cut down easily enough and Inutaisho fell to his knees, the blood loss finally catching up with him. Sesshomaru knew his father wasn't going to last much longer, so he walked forward and knelt in front of him after he crawled past the flames.

 

“I would have been the one to defeat you, Father,” Sesshomaru said, anger burning deep inside. “Instead, you fall here, the final wound against your life inflicted by a mere mortal.”

 

“You followed me?” Inutaisho asked, incredulous. Sesshomaru looked back down at the ground.

 

“You died for them. That mortal and the hanyo brat.”

 

“You… can't understand,” Inutaisho wheezed. “You have no heart, Sesshomaru. I… blame myself.”

 

“You taught me to hate them. I will not allow you to teach me to love them.”

 

“Do you think I don't know?” the old man asked. Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed. “I know you… loved her.” Sesshomaru stood. “I know what you did to her. She confessed to me.”

 

“Then you know the truth,” Sesshomaru said, looking in the direction his stepmother had fled.

 

“How could I not? I was… in battle…” Inutaisho fell forward to the ground. “You… betrayed… me…”

 

“You betrayed me first, Father.”

 

“And whose was greater?” the dying man gasped. “Even I don't know…” The silence stretched between them so long Sesshomaru suspected his father had died. Unwilling to rob his father's body for the sword he coveted, he turned to walk away, assuming it would come to him in inheritance. Inutaisho spoke again. “You will never understand… Until you… have… something to… protect. Please… protect her…protect them.”

 

“So that I can meet with your fate? I think not.”

 

“I… pray… that someday… you… understand… my son.” Inutaisho's breath rattled from his body and Sesshomaru left him behind to follow Izayoi.

 

`Protect her? How can he ask that of me? He stole her from me.' Sesshomaru fumed. `What a pitiful death.' He watched the human woman duck into a cave with her newborn child wailing into the night. Sesshomaru didn't even know if it was a male or female child. `A male, of course,' he thought, arrogantly. `Even as a hanyo, he will be strong for the blood running in his veins.' He looked around for his father's vassal, the flea, but didn't hear, scent or see him. Though he was so small, it was difficult to tell if he was nearby.

 

He walked to the mouth of the cave and looked in at the woman huddled inside. She stood and started to walk to him, a beautiful expression of happiness on her face, but it faded as she recognized him. `Did she mistake me for Father? How confusing it must be to be cursed with the weak senses of a human.'

 

“Sesshomaru,” she whispered. She looked past him. “Is he…”

 

“Father has perished at the hand of a mortal.” Sesshomaru tried to feel nothing as Izayoi's head fell in despair.

 

“Have you come to seek your revenge on me? Or your brother?” she asked.

 

“Brother…” Sesshomaru said softly, almost a question. Izayoi opened the red cloth that concealed the baby and Sesshomaru looked at him, stepping forward for a closer inspection. “He is deformed,” Sesshomaru grunted upon seeing the animalistic ears. Izayoi snapped him back to her breast.

 

“He is as beautiful as his father,” she whispered. Sesshomaru turned his head to the side.

 

“The blindness of motherly love. You know that no one else will ever see him so. He is marked.”

 

“I knew that as I carried him,” she said. “I knew what his life would be, even without your hateful reminders. He will at least have one parent who loves him.”

 

“Give him to me,” Sesshomaru demanded. Izayoi held the baby tighter to her chest. “I will not kill him.” She searched his eyes, and then slowly held the baby out. Sesshomaru took the boy and pushed the blanket back, nearly sighing in relief when he saw that the child was not cursed with a tail as well, like a common wolf. Although, at least he could have hidden the tail; the ears would be a dead giveaway. Other than the soft puppy ears, the child was perfect. Sesshomaru was disappointed that none of the family markings had transferred onto him. It was strange to see the bare wrists and cheeks on a face so like his own and his father's. “What is his name?”

 

“InuYasha,” Izayoi responded. InuYasha let out a whimper at Sesshomaru's scrutiny and flailed his tiny fists. Sesshomaru balanced the small body against his arm, holding the little head in his hand and offered the baby his finger. InuYasha gripped it with a strength no human infant would possess. Sesshomaru pulled his finger back, wrapped the infant back up and handed him back to Izayoi.

 

“Father asked me to protect you,” he said irritably. “I will do no such thing.” Sesshomaru turned and walked off.

 

“You won't even protect him?” Izayoi asked.

 

“You will be adequate protection for my brother,” he answered without looking back or stopping. `I will never forgive you, Izayoi. You should have chosen me. I would have walked another path for you.'

 

6 years later…

 

Sesshomaru looked at the child playing by himself. He was humming something that the youkai didn't recognize. But he could hear it being played by koto in the main building. He knew Izayoi was playing it, as he had often heard her play it when he watched her before his father took her as a wife. Sesshomaru loved music and Izayoi's playing had been what caught his attention. As a princess, it was normal for her to learn to play, but she did so with a grace and care for the music he heard from no other mortal woman.

 

He hated the sound. And he hated InuYasha's soft voice singing along. He stepped forward, revealing himself and the boy stopped singing to look up at him. They watched each other for a moment, and then InuYasha stood and walked over to him.

 

“Are you like me?” he asked quietly.

 

“I am no hanyo,” Sesshomaru responded hotly. The child's ears went back, lying against his head.

 

“I only just learned that word,” he confessed. “I don't understand why people say it in such a way. Why is it wrong for me to be a half-youkai?”

 

“Why are you not with your mother?” Sesshomaru asked, changing the subject. He didn't know why the innocent question pained him, but he didn't like the feeling. He would have to harden himself against it in the future… if the child lived.

 

“She's playing the koto,” he answered.

 

“I can hear that,” Sesshomaru said. InuYasha turned his head to the side. The gesture was eerily similar to one Sesshomaru himself had and he made a mental note to stop doing it. Anything that could be used to compare him to this child must be removed if possible. Nothing could be done for the hair and eyes.

 

“Then why did you ask?”

 

“Why are you not in the room with her?” Sesshomaru rephrased.

 

“She's playing for the lords and ladies,” InuYasha answered. “They don't like me to be there.” Sesshomaru went down to one knee to look the boy in the eyes. Certainly, they were a mirror image of his own and his father's. “Are you my brother?” InuYasha asked.

 

“Why do you ask that?” Sesshomaru responded.

 

“Mother says that I have one. You look like me. Are you lord Sesshomaru?”

 

“Yes,” Sesshomaru answered. They stared at each other for a long time. Sesshomaru heard the koto piece conclude and he rose to his feet.

 

“Aren't you going to stay?” InuYasha asked.

 

“No,” Sesshomaru answered and then turned to walk away.

 

“Why did you come?” the boy asked.

 

“To see you,” Sesshomaru answered.

 

“Will you come again?”

 

“No,” Sesshomaru said and then walked out of the boy's life for what he thought was forever.

 

200 years later (give or take)…

 

Sesshomaru watched Rin playing in the water with Jaken and thought back on the day Izayoi had died. He watched InuYasha run from the villagers, who intended to kill him now that he no longer had the princess' protection. He watched the boy run from youkai who smelled his weakness. He felt nothing in his cold heart for the child he had held in his arms as a newborn. He hadn't even hated him then…

 

He had hoped InuYasha would die by the hands of the youkai. But the child did not disappoint Sesshomaru. He was strong, resourceful and eventually his own heart became cold. Sesshomaru didn't lose all his respect for the hanyo until the day he learned some priestess had sealed InuYasha to a tree; his life ended by an arrow. Then he learned he had awakened and possibly knew the location of Inutaisho's grave. So he broke his vow to never see the hanyo again and retrieved the grave, though not the sword, that he sought. He had used Izayoi's image to learn the truth that even InuYasha hadn't known and he was proud when he felt nothing for torturing the youkai that looked like her.

 

He had truly purged Izayoi from his heart. But not InuYasha. He should have killed him after retrieving the pearl, but he left him alive. He should have ignored the girl who traveled with him and dissolved InuYasha before killing her. Time and again, he should have killed the hanyo, but didn't. His heart just wasn't in it. He didn't want to be the hand that slew him, no matter what he boasted.

 

And now he had a child. A human child, nonetheless. She laughed and he smiled inside. She feared and he killed the object of her fright. She even loved him. He was very confused over his own feelings for her. He had spent so much time hardening his heart against love that he refused to believe he could feel it at all. Yet… She fell and he picked her up. If she was endangered, he stopped whatever he was doing, no matter how important, and he saved her. He bought her a new kimono as needed, beat Jaken for not taking care of her properly, kept Ah-Un to carry her and fed her when there was no way for her to feed herself.

 

She was his daughter.

 

These were thoughts he kept very private, locked away even from himself most of the time. The thought of anyone discovering her as such caused his blood to slow with fear. He had lost his family once; he did not want to do so again. Yet, as her mortal nature demanded, he eventually would. All he could do was be certain that she lived as long as a human could. That would satisfy him. Once he had made that peace with himself, he sealed the knowledge away where his enemies couldn't use it. He heard the jeers that he was succumbing to his father's weakness and raising the child to be his bride. He severed the throats that uttered them.

 

They died believing that he had no feelings for any mortal. It was as he wanted it. Many died believing he had no feelings at all. That was something he longed for. It was said that youkai do not love. Even youkai perpetuated the myth. But if they did not love, there would be no hanyo in the world. Sesshomaru knew this better than most. So it was his greatest desire to be the strongest and the coldest of them all.

 

Yet he couldn't kill one little hanyo brat.

 

Rin came running to him, soaking wet and wringing out the golden kimono on the grass. He braced himself for what he knew was coming and remained solid when she ran into him, wrapping her cold, wet arms around him. He glared down at her, but she only grinned back. He patted her head and stepped away. She threw her arms out to her sides and spun around until she fell over. A smile tugged at his lips and he stared up at the sky, sighing to cover it. Her exuberance had grown with her, rather than diminishing as she aged. It had been three years since they had defeated Naraku and he had proved himself the strongest youkai in Japan, yet again.

 

Rin was getting closer to childbearing age and Sesshomaru wondered what he would do with her when she reached it. It wouldn't be proper for her to travel with him, as an unwed woman. And no one would believe he wasn't bedding her—he could see for himself that she was going to be beautiful. It wasn't the kind of beauty he preferred, though. He didn't particularly care what others thought, but he didn't want Rin to hear the rude comments.

 

He almost wanted to join Rin in her antics, the day was so hot and a cool dip in the water would be pleasing. But he wasn't here for pleasure; he was here for information. InuYasha had disappeared shortly after Naraku was defeated. There was no trace of him, anywhere Sesshomaru searched. He would hear a rumor that the boy was back in the village with the demon exterminator and her monk husband, but when he checked, InuYasha was never to be seen. So he was waiting on the outskirts of the village for any sign of him.

 

It was the village whose nearby forest had seen InuYasha pinned to a tree for fifty years—his downfall and Sesshomaru's secret shame. He had forbidden anyone to utter the hanyo's name in his presence after he received the news from Jaken. But here he was, actively seeking out the embarrassment of his bloodline. He waited calmly, if with little patience, scenting the air periodically. He had tried sending out his youki to look for InuYasha, but it had attracted the demon slayer and monk. They were certainly all surprised to see each other. He asked them about the hanyo's whereabouts and they exchanged a glance that told him they knew and weren't going to share the information.

 

It was beneath him to extract the information by force, so he let them go on their way with their lie of not knowing where he was. That had been a week ago and he was concerned that they had warned InuYasha that he was looking for him and the hanyo was now avoiding the village. But that made no sense, either. Sesshomaru had agreed to allow InuYasha to keep the Tetsusaiga and had left him alone for all this time. He no longer believed the boy to be his enemy and had actually come, considering allowing the boy to know the truth about the night his father died and certain other aspects about his life.

 

He berated himself for allowing the boy to slip past his defenses and catch his attention. He had tried so hard to have nothing to do with him, no interest in his life. But he had learned more about InuYasha during the last battles, where they were forced to work together, than he could know and still hate him. He had a grudging respect for him… one that had been there as he watched the boy grow, watched him overcome adversity that should have killed him and watched him fall only to rise again even stronger than before.

 

There. Sesshomaru caught a whiff of InuYasha and his human girl. Strange, it was very strong and rather close. He didn't understand how he had not scented him before this. It was as if he had just appeared out of nowhere. He told Rin and Jaken to remain where they were and walked quickly toward the source of the scent. He stopped when he saw the two of them crawling out of a well and narrowed his eyes at the strange behavior. He stepped out of the shadows of the tree that concealed him and InuYasha spun around, his hand going to his sword on instinct. He relaxed when he saw Sesshomaru and turned to pull Kagome to her feet.

 

“Hi, Sesshomaru,” Kagome called tentatively. Sesshomaru nodded to her in greeting, still someone ruffled by her personality. She was fierce, loyal, reckless, dressed strangely and was as friendly with him now as she had been rude to him before the truce. She intrigued and offended him at the same time. She really was perfect for InuYasha, in his opinion. The hanyo nodded at him in turn.

 

“Why are you crawling out of a dry well?” Sesshomaru asked, unable to remain silent about something so absurd. InuYasha's ear twitched and he suddenly laughed. “What?” Sesshomaru demanded, suspecting he was the reason the hanyo had just laughed.

 

“I was just remembering that time you dropped in on me as a kid and asked why I wasn't with my mother,” he said. “You appeared the same way you did just now, although I got to ask the first question then.”

 

“And it was a stupid question,” Sesshomaru said, no longer on guard. It wasn't a derisive laugh, but a laugh at circumstance.

 

“So was yours. You should have known the answer…” InuYasha crossed his arms and looked at Sesshomaru curiously.

 

“This time it was not,” Sesshomaru said stubbornly. He wanted an answer.

 

“Okay, you're right. And since it doesn't matter if you know, the well is a portal,” InuYasha answered.

 

“A portal to what?”

 

“Kagome's time.” InuYasha waited until Sesshomaru glared at him, refusing to continue to ask questions that should be answered without being spoken. “She's from about five hundred years in the future,” he finally explained. Sesshomaru stared at the girl. `So that is why she is so strange,' he thought. He looked at the well, wondering what another five hundred years would do to the world. “Don't think about trying to use it, only me and Kagome can pass through,” InuYasha added. Sesshomaru ignored the warning. Of course he would try to use it, but not in front of InuYasha.

 

“Then you live in her time now?” Sesshomaru asked. InuYasha nodded. “Are you mated?”

 

“Hey!” Kagome protested. Sesshomaru raised his eyebrows. It was a valid question; he wanted to know if his bloodline was continuing.

 

“It's okay, Kagome, he doesn't mean any harm by it,” InuYasha told her, surprising Sesshomaru. “It's actually one of the friendliest things he's asked me,” InuYasha finished, turning back to Sesshomaru. “And yes, but we're not trying for children yet.” Sesshomaru nodded. “Have you found a woman yet?” InuYasha asked.

 

“No,” Sesshomaru said, somewhat uncomfortable with the question. He hadn't really been looking. He had developed an interest in Naraku's incarnation, Kagura, but it had passed with her. He hadn't really actively looked since Izayoi. There just seemed no reason.

 

“You're not leaving creating an heir entirely up to me are you?” InuYasha asked with amusement in his eyes. Sesshomaru looked away, suddenly very upset. “Did I just hit a nerve?” he asked. “I didn't mean to.” Sesshomaru turned to leave. He had the answers to his questions now; there was no need to linger. “Sesshomaru?”

 

“I had merely wondered where you had hidden yourself away and if you had taken Kagome as a mate.” Sesshomaru used her name to acknowledge her relation to himself. It was all he could give the boy he had denied a family for centuries.

 

“She's not just a mate,” InuYasha said. “We were married in the spring.” Sesshomaru stopped. He had assumed that, of course, but to hear it spoken…

 

“And you didn't invite your older brother?” Sesshomaru teased.

 

“Didn't think you would come,” InuYasha answered. Rin chose that moment to come crashing through the trees, shrieking in terror. Sesshomaru immediately went on alert, but he didn't sense any youkai. Instead, a human boy popped out behind her and threw a wet ball of mud at her. It missed Rin, of course, and hit Sesshomaru on the leg of his white hakama. He looked at the offending stain, then up at the offending boy, who was paling dramatically, until he spied InuYasha.

 

“Oh, is he with you?” the boy asked, rudely gesturing to Sesshomaru. The taiyoukai had just been irritated, now he was angry.

 

“Show some respect!” Rin yelled. There was mud in her hair and he felt the chill of the water still on her sinking into his arm, where she clutched at his sleeve.

 

“Rin, why is this boy chasing you?” Sesshomaru asked, controlling his rage. A mortal child was not worth his time if he was not threatening Rin's life.

 

“I don't know, Youfu-sama! He just ran up and pulled my hair, then pushed me in the mud!”

 

“You were playing with that demon!” the boy protested.

 

“Youfu-sama?” Kagome repeated, her eyes wide and fixed on Sesshomaru and Rin. InuYasha was also staring at them.

 

“I take it you harmed my retainer as well?” Sesshomaru asked, wondering how much damage he could do to the boy without severe negative consequences.

 

“Your…” the boy took a step back. “You're not with InuYasha-san after all then?” the boy asked.

 

“No, he's Lord Sesshomaru!” Rin shot out angrily.

 

“Your father is a demon?” the boy asked. The word that fell from Rin's lips in that moment was one that Sesshomaru knew he had never taught her. He looked down in reproach, but she refused to meet his eyes, keeping her own fixed in anger on the boy, instead.

 

“Where did you learn such a thing?” Sesshomaru demanded. Rin finally looked up at him, blushing.

 

“Jaken-sama,” Rin admitted. Sesshomaru made a mental note to beat Jaken within an inch of his life.

 

“Do not use it again,” Sesshomaru commanded.

 

“Yes, Youfu-sama,” Rin said, looking abashed. Sesshomaru looked back at the boy and considered him. He had unwittingly let Sesshomaru know that Rin was not as protected as he had believed; his retainer was as foul-mouthed as InuYasha and Rin understood what it meant to call a youkai `adoptive father,' something he had been concerned over. He had allowed her to continue using the title when it stopped another youkai from the line of questioning he was beginning about the child's relationship with him. It had saved that youkai his life, as well, when he realized he was about to say that Sesshomaru was fucking someone he considered to be a daughter.

 

It was also dangerous, for Rin, to be his daughter. He wondered how the girl would respond when someone didn't immediately make a respectful change in topic upon discovering their connection. Now he knew. So the boy had unintentionally lain to rest many things that Sesshomaru was worried about, but hadn't found the appropriate time to bring up.

 

“You may leave. If you ever touch my youjo again, I will kill you,” Sesshomaru said, using a term he never had before. He saw Rin's look of elated astonishment and tried to ignore it. But it affected him anyway and he felt his mood lift immensely. The child turned and ran away, looking appropriately frightened. If she could acknowledge him as `father' he could call her `daughter.' Just two years before, he would never have believed he would even think such a thing, much less say it.

 

He turned to InuYasha, braced for the questions that he was sure would follow. He nearly turned and walked away in irritation at the look spread across the couple's faces. But he couldn't blame them, not really. When he had known them before, he had been trying to find a way to rid himself of Rin, certain he would have to turn on her eventually anyway. He still felt justified in being offended at the level of shock on their faces. After all, he had been leading her around for over four years now.

 

InuYasha looked down at Rin curiously. She looked back up at him and they examined each other for a few minutes. Rin had always been a bold child and time with Sesshomaru had not changed that in her at all. It was one of the main reasons he liked her. He could brutally kill someone in front of her and she would run to his side while the blood dried on his hands. He felt her small hand take his, almost as if she knew what he was thinking and he stepped away, squeezing her fingers imperceptibly. He had once wished to break her of her physically affectionate nature, but decided that simply making it appear he disapproved served him better.

 

“That makes you my niece,” InuYasha commented. Sesshomaru cursed Izayoi's name in his mind, but said nothing out loud.

 

“Then you are my aunt and uncle,” Rin answered simply, and then glanced at Sesshomaru, a question in her eyes. He avoided her gaze, uncomfortable. He sometimes suspected that Rin could read his thoughts if he allowed her and these thoughts were something she must not know. It was bad enough that horrid sword of his father's had been in his mind. The fact that it missed the one little detail was a testament to his own mental prowess. He didn't know why he continued to harbor the secret Izayoi had begun, but he knew it was not yet time to reveal it.

 

“Rin.”

 

“Yes, Youfu-sama?”

 

“We are leaving.” Sesshomaru walked away, wondering if he would ever cease being a coward in this one respect.

 

67 years later…

 

“I've had a good life, Youfu-sama,” Rin whispered. Sesshomaru held her hand, as he had for the past hour as she slept. Her children were gathered around, and their children as well. Even one tiny great-grandson rested in his mother's arms as she wept for her grandmother. Her husband tried to calm her tears, but the princess had always been very fond of her grandmother. Sesshomaru looked around at the humans gathered around Rin's deathbed and knew everyone of them by face, name and personality.

 

“You have, Rin,” Sesshomaru agreed. She smiled at him and he met her eyes.

 

“Will you miss me?” she whispered.

 

“Don't be stupid,” he answered. She closed her eyes and her smile grew until it looked like it would split her face.

 

“Tell me the secret you've always kept from me,” she whispered. It was so soft that he knew none of the humans around had heard it. His eyes widened. Even as she lay dying, she had the ability to surprise him. So he leaned down and whispered it to her, the confession that he had never before spoken aloud. Her eyes went wide and met his. She lifted her other hand to his face and touched the stripes there, then the moon. He held still, curious about the behavior that she had never before displayed. “I've always wanted to touch them,” she explained.

 

“You had only to ask,” he responded. She smiled.

”I know.” He stayed very still as her eyes closed again and didn't move, even as many of her family had to leave. Rin's husband had died several years before, so he sat in his place, keeping her company for the rest of her life. One of the palace servants came to offer Rin her favorite food and drink, but he shooed them away, letting her sleep. The rest of her family left them alone and a few hours later, she opened her eyes again. “I understand, you know,” she said.

 

“I knew you would,” he admitted. “But I had hoped you forgot over the years.”

 

“My memory is the one thing I've never lost,” she said with a smile.

“You have lost nothing of yourself, my Rin,” he said. “You are still the child I met seventy-one years ago.” Rin's eyes went wide.

 

“Has it been so long? And you've kept track.”

 

“I have memorized every moment of your life,” he said. “You may be the only daughter I ever have and I would be happy with that.” Tears sprung to her eyes and he forced himself not to look away. He could count the number of times she had cried since he met her. She cried the day Sesshomaru left her with her husband; she shed tears when her first son died at birth; she cried when Sango and Miroku passed; the day InuYasha and Kagome said they would not be coming through the well again; and she cried the day her husband died. Never before had he seen her cry from joy.

 

“Forgive an old woman her sentimentality, Youfu-sama, but I love you, too.” Sesshomaru smiled at her.

 

“Would you like something to eat?” he asked her. She nodded and he signaled a servant to bring her food. He lifted her frail shoulders to hold her against his chest while the servant lifted the food to her lips. The weakness in her body saddened him, but Sesshomaru knew it would soon be over and he intended to send her on with as many happy memories as possible. When she had eaten all she could of her favorite foods, he gently laid her down again, brushing her hair, now as silver as his own, back from her face.

 

“Call them in again,” she whispered. He nodded and did as she asked. Her family gathered one final time and Sesshomaru stayed kneeling by her side, holding her hand. He listened to her say good-bye one final time and his heart stopped with hers. A moment later, his own started beating again, but hers didn't. Her breath shuddered from her lips and he continued to hold her hand. Rin's daughter began to wail and all the women in the room lost it. Sesshomaru held on while the heat started to fade from her skin and listened to them mourn. Even Rin's sons began to weep. Everyone who knew her loved her. `I am no different, Rin,' he thought to her spirit. `I will always love you.'

 

He didn't leave her side until he felt her spirit leave her body.

 

263 years later…

 

Sesshomaru fell to his knees, weak and bloody. His lung rattled wetly and the sword resting next to his heart inside his body was pulled free. The men screamed at him and he knew it was over. He would not die here, defeated by these holy warriors, and allow them to purge his soul as well, so he fled, one last time. The war had been bitter and he knew no youkai who survived it. He had been one of the few to last this long. The soldiers that had originally fought him were dead from old age and these young ones should never have seen the end of his life.

 

But it was over. The war of the mortal world against youkai had been won. Those that could fade into the shadows to survive had done so. Sesshomaru had refused to leave his lands, refused to hide like a frightened animal and now it had caught up to him. He was not ashamed to die this way. Though he would not die on the grounds that ran red with his blood, he had been killed in battle. His honor was satisfied with that, at least. It had taken several armies to bring him down and he was tired of combat for the first time in his life.

 

He returned to the one village that had never betrayed him. He fell by the bone eater's well and tried to force himself to stand, but his injuries were too terrible. He would never move again. That's when he scented him. He opened his eyes to see InuYasha.

 

“Sesshomaru,” InuYasha greeted. The boy had grown into a man, now even older in appearance than Sesshomaru himself.

 

“InuYasha,” Sesshomaru acknowledged. The hanyo knelt next to him and examined the blood soaked remains of his armor and clothing.

 

“I knew this was the day you died,” he said. “I have waited for you since dawn.”

 

“Why did you come?” Sesshomaru asked.

 

“Because you are my brother,” InuYasha answered and Sesshomaru flinched. It was now or never…

 

“Please, InuYasha, do me a favor,” he said.

 

“What?” InuYasha asked.

 

“Take me to Rin's grave.” Sesshomaru closed his eyes against the pain as InuYasha lifted him and carried his broken body to the gravesite, so far from where Rin had died, but where her body was buried, where her descendants still lived to this day. “There is something that no one could ever have told you,” Sesshomaru said. “About the day Father died and you were born.”

 

“What about it?” InuYasha asked. “Were you there?” he asked in surprise. “I thought Father died alone?”

 

“We spoke, one final time, as he laid dying, as you and I are now. It is fitting,” Sesshomaru coughed blood from his ruined lungs. “It is fitting that you be here with me as I die, the same as I was with my father.”

 

“Our father, you mean,” InuYasha said, looking puzzled at the emphasis Sesshomaru placed in the sentence.

 

“No, InuYasha,” Sesshomaru said, trying to speak quickly. His heart had only a few more beats left. “Inutaisho only sired one son in his long life,” he confessed. “As did I.”

 

“What?” InuYasha asked, still confused. Sesshomaru refused to spell it out. It had been hard enough to say to Rin, centuries before. “Are you saying…” Sesshomaru waited patiently, even as his life ended, for his son to grasp the truth.

 

“I loved Izayoi,” Sesshomaru confessed. “It was through my attempts to court her that Father met her and stole her away. She told me that I was just a killer, that there was no room in my cold heart for her. And I tried to show her that it wasn't true. I offered to give up my path, walk a new one with her,” Sesshomaru stopped to gasp, but he was determined to get out the rest of his story before he died. “What I did to her when she refused me… was unforgivable. While Father was away in battle, I tried one last time to convince her to leave him for me. But she loved him. And I…” Sesshomaru almost couldn't admit to the darkest moment of his life. “I took her against her will.”

 

“You…” InuYasha was looking at him in horror and anger.

 

“It was that act of desperation that created you,” Sesshomaru admitted. “I fathered you in the worst possible way. The night that you were born and Father died, I came to take responsibility. Izayoi named you my brother on that night, denying me even you.” InuYasha was shaking against the dark truths, his claws buried in Sesshomaru's wrist. The dying taiyoukai could barely feel it. He was far beyond pain now. “I loved you the moment I saw you,” he said. “I wanted to be your father. And I hated her for taking that away from me. And I hated you… for everything you had no part in.”

 

“Why now?” InuYasha whispered, tears running down his face. “Why tell me now, as you die? When I will never be able to forgive you?”

 

“The family legacy,” Sesshomaru laughed bitterly. “Father told me as he died that he knew what I had done, that you were mine and not his. He asked me whose betrayal was greater—his or mine. To this day, I still do not have an answer,” Sesshomaru said. “He asked me to protect Izayoi and you and I refused out of hatred. I… betrayed you. And I betrayed myself.” Sesshomaru felt himself growing lighter, the darkness eating away at the edges of his vision. “But his dying wish was granted… I understand. I know what it is to have someone to protect. I know that it is the secret to Tetsusaiga and why I was never able to have it. My blood in you was sealed with that damn sword,” he hissed. “Izayoi raised you better than I ever would have.”

 

“You're rambling,” InuYasha said, wiping the blood and hair from Sesshomaru's eyes.

 

“You are right that I waited until the worst time to tell you,” Sesshomaru agreed. “I have so much I have longed to say to you. But I suppose that all that is important right now has been said. Except one thing…”

 

“What?” InuYasha asked.

 

“I'm sorry.” Sesshomaru watched InuYasha's eyes go wide. “And… I am proud of you.” His last words floated on the air hours later as InuYasha still knelt by his body. They were words he had longed to hear from another throat for centuries. He had lamented not knowing his father for so long and it was all a lie. He had been there his entire life. He buried Sesshomaru and marked his grave, knowing that it would survive for centuries to come, having found it by chance when Kagome was buried. She would be buried not far from here, in the graveyard that housed all her ancestors, including a little girl that had grown old and died without InuYasha ever knowing she was his adoptive sister. Sesshomaru had loved her as a daughter and InuYasha had loved her many-times-great-granddaughter as his wife.

 

They were a confused family indeed. InuYasha watched the sun set and rise again, not leaving the place he had buried the last of his ancestral family. The place he had buried his brother… no. The place he had buried his father. He touched the words on the stone and didn't hide his tears.

 

Here lies Sesshomaru, son of Inu no Taisho and Great Taiyoukai, Lord of the Western lands. May he rest in peace.

 

 

The end.

 

End Notes: I hope you enjoyed my version of the story of Lord Sesshomaru. This is the first time a story I was writing drove me to tears as I wrote it. I hope it evoked some feelings in you, the reader, as well. Yes, I know, it was a “Luke, I am your overused plot device” story, but I hadn't seen it for this series and even if I'm not the first to think it, I hope I'm one of the first to write it. I've never done Rin's death scene before and I don't ever want to do that again. I tried to stick to canon as much as possible, with the obvious exception of InuYasha's parentage. I hope you liked it and remember to review!

 

And I leave you with a quote from System of a Down: “Father into you hands, I commend my spirit. Father into your hands… Why have you forsaken me? In your eyes, forsaken me? In your thoughts, forsaken me? In your heart… forsaken… me?” -Chop Suey.

 

Japanese Translations:

Youfu: foster father, adoptive father
Youjo: foster daughter, adoptive daughter
Youkai: monster (commonly translated demon)
Hanyo: half-youkai
Youki: youkai energy (commonly translated `demonic energy)