InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ First ❯ I Wanna Come First ( Chapter 1 )

First

 

 

Disclaimer: The pairing should be proof enough that I don't own Inuyasha.

 

 

I Wanna Come First

 

 

Kagome sighed as she looked at Inuyasha. He was staring at the dark sky. Lately they've been chasing nothing but rumors—false ones at that—about Naraku… and about Kikyo. Inside Kagome was screaming. How much more of this could she take?? She honestly wasn't sure how much longer she could last.

 

She loved Inuyasha and she wanted to be with him. There was no secret about that. And he knew it as well as anyone else. But she was reaching the end of her rope. It was going on two years now and she still only came second-fiddle. Even the most understanding and loving person in the universe would eventually tire of being only second best, no matter who they were or who their rival was… especially if their rival was already—technically—dead.

 

It was insane and Kagome knew it. All logical thought told her that she should have left him long ago… to stay and do what she needed to and forget about any possible romance regarding Inuyasha. There was none. She hated it, but she knew there was no changing it. Even if they put Kikyo to rest, Kagome would still come in second to her memory. She'd be the one he'd be with because he couldn't have the one he wanted.

 

And Kagome wasn't sure she'd ever be okay with that…

 

 

The day went on as usual. Sango and Miroku were walking behind Kagome and Inuyasha. Miroku was probably doing something perverted but Kagome wasn't paying much attention to him. She was barely paying attention to the small fox in her arms.

 

She was thinking over her epiphany. It was time she moved on. This time she would, she was through being Inuyasha's little go-to girl when Kikyo wasn't around. She wasn't going to walk around pining for a man she knew would never love her as much as his first.

 

She thought back to the day she decided once and for all that she was finished.

 

Kagome ran the brush through her hair as she stared into the mirror with depressed eyes. Inuyasha ran off to find Kikyo again, she briefly wondered if he'd found her before pushing it out of her mind. She didn't care; she couldn't handle thinking about it.

 

She left, telling the others that she needed some time alone to catch up on work and to not let Inuyasha come after her. They didn't believe her, she knew that, they just agreed, looking at her with their pity-filled eyes.

 

Was she really that pitiful? Yes, of course she was. She followed Inuyasha around like a puppy, practically begging for just a little affection. Affection that he gave sparingly…

 

She knew he loved her to some point. He showed her that in the little things he would do, like making sure she was eating, taking care of her when she was sick, worrying about her and protecting her…he loved her more than a friend, she knew that when she saw him looking at her through the corners of his eyes.

 

But as long as Kikyo was around, he would never want her first.

 

She set the brush down and walked off for school. She remembered when her friends met him and she remembered how they tried to make her feel better about being only second best. She shook her head; all they managed to do that day was depress her.

 

But that was easy to do these days…wasn't it?

 

She really was pitiful; no wonder Inuyasha would rather have Kikyo at his side. Kagome had the collar but Kikyo held the leash. She was stronger than her, she didn't bother following Inuyasha around… she had him following her…

 

It was true that Kagome envied the dead woman, but lately she'd been finding herself looking up to the priestess as well.

 

She sat down in her seat and in less than five minutes, her friends were surrounding her.

 

“How's Inuyasha?” asked Ayumi, a dreamy look in her face.

 

“Fine,” Kagome replied. Inuyasha was hardly the topic she wanted to discuss at the moment.

 

“Did you have a fight again? You look sad,” Yuka stated.

 

Kagome shrugged, “Look, I don't really want to talk about it.”

 

“Did you break up?” Eri asked, her eyes filling with pity.

 

The seventeen year old stared at her. She was so sick of those eyes! She was so sick of being pitied! “Yes,” she answered them.

 

There was a rush of sympathetic comments from all three girls at the same time. “I'm so sorry!”

 

“Was it his ex again?”

 

“You can get him back!” Kagome didn't really know who said what and there were other comments of the like.

 

She just shook her head, “I'm done,” she said quietly.

 

The three stopped talking and stared at her. Kagome looked back at them with determined eyes. “I'm through with him,” she said with a shaky voice. “I'm better than that. I'm not going to be pitied by anyone and I won't be second best to anyone anymore!” she shouted her voice steadier and stronger with each word.

 

Everyone in the class stared at her.

 

That was two weeks ago. She actually felt better after that and the girls congratulated her on her strength… and for the first time in a long time, Kagome actually felt strong.

 

Unfortunately, since she'd been back in the past she felt her resolve falter more than once. Every time she looked at the hanyou she was reminded of her deep love for him.

 

`Keep your chin up, Kagome. You can beat this. Just remember you have pride, you aren't pathetic and you deserve better than second place,' she told herself. She nodded as though it reinforced her decision.

 

“Hey!”

 

She blinked as she focused on the golden eyes staring her in her face. “Stop daydreaming already and let's get going!”

 

She shook her head. Inuyasha must've wanted to pick up the pace, she figured as she watched him kneel down for her, expecting her to get on. She began before stopping herself, this was her first test. She had to keep herself at a distance if she was ever going to move on.

 

“Actually, Inuyasha, I'd rather ride with Sango and Miroku,” she told him quietly.

 

She saw the slight hurt in his eyes before it quickly transformed into anger. “Feh! Go ahead, like I care. Less weight off my back,” he said as he ran off.

 

Kagome got on Kilala and they followed him. She felt bad for doing that, but it was what had to be done… she'd done a lot for Inuyasha in the past couple years… she just couldn't always be with him anymore. It was for the good of her own sanity and she hoped that one day she could explain this all to him and he would understand.

 

Here it is. The first chapter of First, I hope you enjoy it.