InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Forgive Me ❯ wrongness ( Chapter 4 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: inu-kyolover 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 09.24.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.4K | Visits: 145 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 09.24.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.4K | Visits: 145 | Status: Work In Progress
A/N: I don't own Inuyasha
Bold words are flashbacks
I don't own Miskakes by Godsmack
Chapter 3: Wrongness
---------------------------------------------------
Free?
I don't seem to be
--------------------------------------------------
Inuyasha settled on the grass with an almost inaudible moan of pain. Every step he had taken to get away from the others had caused a jolt of pain to go through his head and he still hadn't gotten that far. He sun shined down on him, seeming to mock him with its brightness. "Damnit! Damn Damn Damn Damnit!!" Trying very hard to get his breathing under control, he suddenly slammed his fist into the ground. He sniffed the air, scowling then winced as that made his head hurt. "What?" he said aloud just as his group came into view. They purposefully walked towards him. "What the fuck do you want?!"
"Inuyasha what's your problem?" Shippo jumped towards him, aiming for the hanyou's shoulder. Reflexively, the white haired boy's hand shout out and caught the runt by his tail. He glared at the kit then half threw half pushed him away.
"Inuyasha! don't take your anger out on children!" Kagome glared at him, but he just stared back impassivly.
He suddenly glared at her. He was running hot and cold, one minute compleatly blank, the next angry, his emotions were running beyond his control. He was flickering, but between himself and what?
"Tell us what's wrong with you Inuyasha, your acting very oddly" Miroku peered into his eyes, almost like he was trying to read his mind.
"Yes, your even more moody then usual" Sango observed
"Yeah? I hadn't noticed" Inuyasha laughed humorlessly"Why Sango, I knew the others were a bunch of bakas, but I thought you had a least half a brain in that head of yours" He lips curled in a mocking smile " yes your even more moody then usual" he mimicked. Then there was that laugh again, compleatly humorless, and a bit hesterical.
Kagome kneeled on the grass next to him, and reached out to touch his arm. Glaring down at the slim hand on his arm, he almost felt his anger crack, almost. Suddenly a new wave of pain slammed into his head, bringing with it cold, bitter anger. He tried to ignore the anger, to control it, he really did. Unfortunatly though, controlling his anger was never one of his strong point. She opened her mouth, to ask again, he was sure, what was wrong, but he cut her off.
"Don't," he growled at her, pushing her hand away. "Damnable humans! Always sticking your noses where they don't belong! Why don't you just-"
"It's because we care Inuyasha. It's because we care that we 'stick our noses where they don't belong'." Miroku stared down at him with a look that bordered on pity. "You can be so stupid sometimes"
Normally the monk's words would have worked at least a little, normally. Normally, he would have gotten angry, blown off steam then he would have been fine, this seemed to be what the monk expected. But today was not normal, he was angry half the time, he was blank the other half. All his emotions were swirling around inside of him, some nearly blinding with there intensity. Suddenly, one emotion rose to the surface, hate. Blind hate. *Kami am I screwed up* He hated everything, for just a moment, hated there whole species, hated this bastard with that fucking look of pity in his fucking eyes. Then it left, leaving him empty, wishing it was still there, just so he felt something.
------------------------------------------------ ----
My soul remains tied to your life
--------------------------------------------------
Miroku saw darkness flicker behind those golden eyes. Then it was gone, just as abrutly as it had come, it left, leaving his face emotionless.
"Leave" there was no growl this time, just wariness. All this talking was making his head throb. He turned away, closing his eyes against the damn sun's mocking brightness and flopped backwards onto the grass.
"Inu-chan why must you be so difficult?" he went to poke the stubborn boy's head with his staff. Inu-chan.! Inuyasha's eyes snapped open and without thinking he rolled into a crouch, dodging the staff. He then spun on his left leg and swept the monk's legs out from under him with his right. "Son of a bitch" he hissed at the monk "don't ever call me that again!"
All eyes turned to Inuyasha, stunned at his reaction. Miroku slowly got to his feet, rubbing the back of his head. Inuyasha was still crouched down but he now looked more likely to run then to fight. All the anger had left Inuyasha again, leaving him even more tired then before. He was ashamed at his outburst and still uneasy about last nights dream. He pushed himself to his feet, not looking at any of them. "We should get going" he muttered.
The others all stared at him like he'd grown a second head then grown a third. Kagome opened her mouth to say something, anything, then closed it. She had no idea what to say. What should she say? She knew that this had to do with that nightmare he'd had, but at the rate things were going, she knew she'd get nothing out of him.
He shifted uneasily from one foot to the other under there stares. Kami he hated when people stared. They finally nodded there agreement and set out for the next village.
-----------------------------------------------------
Every breath you breath deep.....
-----------------------------------------------------
None of them said anything about what had happened but they walked a good 20 feet behind him, whispering to each other and shooting him looks that were either worried or angry. He could have easily heard what they were saying but frankly he was way to tired and his head hurt way to much to do anything. He was having a hard enough time putting one foot in front of the other.
His thoughts drifted away from the group and towards his mother again. He had never properly mourned her, he'd been too preoccupied with just staying alive. It was more like he had pined for her though, needed her to be alive. He was feeling so nostalgic, where were these emotions coming from? They were so out of the blue. They made his head throb. This burning guilt in his stomache, from knowing, from being absolutly certain, that her death had been his fault. He didn't know how he knew, he just did. Before last night, he had had no memory of how she had been killed, only that she had. He knew the how part but still didn't know the why. There were barely any memories of the man who had killed her, no name, barely even a face. Just a feeling and a the ghost of a smell, but he swore to himself that if he ever saw that fucking bastard, he would rip his gods damned throat out. To kill someone simply because she had a hanyou son...
----------------------------------------------------------- -
I feel you circulating through me
-----------------------------------------------------------
He froze as he thought this, how did he know that? How?
The others saw him freeze, and moved closer to see what the problem was. Kagome looked up into his face and was met with the same chaotic jumble of emotions as last night, but one blazed above the rest, overwhelming regret.
*It really was my fault, I didn't want to believe it, but it's true. It was my fault*
"Inuyasha? Inuyasha!"
He never felt there hands shaking him or the dull thud as his body hit the hard ground.
------------------------------------------------------
I'll never forgive myself again
I'm so sick and tired of making the same mistakes
---------------------------------------------------------
TBC.......
this seemed like a good place to stop;)
Bold words are flashbacks
I don't own Miskakes by Godsmack
Chapter 3: Wrongness
---------------------------------------------------
Free?
I don't seem to be
--------------------------------------------------
Inuyasha settled on the grass with an almost inaudible moan of pain. Every step he had taken to get away from the others had caused a jolt of pain to go through his head and he still hadn't gotten that far. He sun shined down on him, seeming to mock him with its brightness. "Damnit! Damn Damn Damn Damnit!!" Trying very hard to get his breathing under control, he suddenly slammed his fist into the ground. He sniffed the air, scowling then winced as that made his head hurt. "What?" he said aloud just as his group came into view. They purposefully walked towards him. "What the fuck do you want?!"
"Inuyasha what's your problem?" Shippo jumped towards him, aiming for the hanyou's shoulder. Reflexively, the white haired boy's hand shout out and caught the runt by his tail. He glared at the kit then half threw half pushed him away.
"Inuyasha! don't take your anger out on children!" Kagome glared at him, but he just stared back impassivly.
He suddenly glared at her. He was running hot and cold, one minute compleatly blank, the next angry, his emotions were running beyond his control. He was flickering, but between himself and what?
"Tell us what's wrong with you Inuyasha, your acting very oddly" Miroku peered into his eyes, almost like he was trying to read his mind.
"Yes, your even more moody then usual" Sango observed
"Yeah? I hadn't noticed" Inuyasha laughed humorlessly"Why Sango, I knew the others were a bunch of bakas, but I thought you had a least half a brain in that head of yours" He lips curled in a mocking smile " yes your even more moody then usual" he mimicked. Then there was that laugh again, compleatly humorless, and a bit hesterical.
Kagome kneeled on the grass next to him, and reached out to touch his arm. Glaring down at the slim hand on his arm, he almost felt his anger crack, almost. Suddenly a new wave of pain slammed into his head, bringing with it cold, bitter anger. He tried to ignore the anger, to control it, he really did. Unfortunatly though, controlling his anger was never one of his strong point. She opened her mouth, to ask again, he was sure, what was wrong, but he cut her off.
"Don't," he growled at her, pushing her hand away. "Damnable humans! Always sticking your noses where they don't belong! Why don't you just-"
"It's because we care Inuyasha. It's because we care that we 'stick our noses where they don't belong'." Miroku stared down at him with a look that bordered on pity. "You can be so stupid sometimes"
Normally the monk's words would have worked at least a little, normally. Normally, he would have gotten angry, blown off steam then he would have been fine, this seemed to be what the monk expected. But today was not normal, he was angry half the time, he was blank the other half. All his emotions were swirling around inside of him, some nearly blinding with there intensity. Suddenly, one emotion rose to the surface, hate. Blind hate. *Kami am I screwed up* He hated everything, for just a moment, hated there whole species, hated this bastard with that fucking look of pity in his fucking eyes. Then it left, leaving him empty, wishing it was still there, just so he felt something.
------------------------------------------------ ----
My soul remains tied to your life
--------------------------------------------------
Miroku saw darkness flicker behind those golden eyes. Then it was gone, just as abrutly as it had come, it left, leaving his face emotionless.
"Leave" there was no growl this time, just wariness. All this talking was making his head throb. He turned away, closing his eyes against the damn sun's mocking brightness and flopped backwards onto the grass.
"Inu-chan why must you be so difficult?" he went to poke the stubborn boy's head with his staff. Inu-chan.! Inuyasha's eyes snapped open and without thinking he rolled into a crouch, dodging the staff. He then spun on his left leg and swept the monk's legs out from under him with his right. "Son of a bitch" he hissed at the monk "don't ever call me that again!"
All eyes turned to Inuyasha, stunned at his reaction. Miroku slowly got to his feet, rubbing the back of his head. Inuyasha was still crouched down but he now looked more likely to run then to fight. All the anger had left Inuyasha again, leaving him even more tired then before. He was ashamed at his outburst and still uneasy about last nights dream. He pushed himself to his feet, not looking at any of them. "We should get going" he muttered.
The others all stared at him like he'd grown a second head then grown a third. Kagome opened her mouth to say something, anything, then closed it. She had no idea what to say. What should she say? She knew that this had to do with that nightmare he'd had, but at the rate things were going, she knew she'd get nothing out of him.
He shifted uneasily from one foot to the other under there stares. Kami he hated when people stared. They finally nodded there agreement and set out for the next village.
-----------------------------------------------------
Every breath you breath deep.....
-----------------------------------------------------
None of them said anything about what had happened but they walked a good 20 feet behind him, whispering to each other and shooting him looks that were either worried or angry. He could have easily heard what they were saying but frankly he was way to tired and his head hurt way to much to do anything. He was having a hard enough time putting one foot in front of the other.
His thoughts drifted away from the group and towards his mother again. He had never properly mourned her, he'd been too preoccupied with just staying alive. It was more like he had pined for her though, needed her to be alive. He was feeling so nostalgic, where were these emotions coming from? They were so out of the blue. They made his head throb. This burning guilt in his stomache, from knowing, from being absolutly certain, that her death had been his fault. He didn't know how he knew, he just did. Before last night, he had had no memory of how she had been killed, only that she had. He knew the how part but still didn't know the why. There were barely any memories of the man who had killed her, no name, barely even a face. Just a feeling and a the ghost of a smell, but he swore to himself that if he ever saw that fucking bastard, he would rip his gods damned throat out. To kill someone simply because she had a hanyou son...
----------------------------------------------------------- -
I feel you circulating through me
-----------------------------------------------------------
He froze as he thought this, how did he know that? How?
The others saw him freeze, and moved closer to see what the problem was. Kagome looked up into his face and was met with the same chaotic jumble of emotions as last night, but one blazed above the rest, overwhelming regret.
*It really was my fault, I didn't want to believe it, but it's true. It was my fault*
"Inuyasha? Inuyasha!"
He never felt there hands shaking him or the dull thud as his body hit the hard ground.
------------------------------------------------------
I'll never forgive myself again
I'm so sick and tired of making the same mistakes
---------------------------------------------------------
TBC.......
this seemed like a good place to stop;)