InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Ghost of Love ❯ Chapter 17 ( Chapter 17 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Well, wasn't this just the development? Kagome was still having a hard time believing that Inuyasha had just confessed his love to her. Harder yet was she had just as easily gave him the same confession. A year she had spent in utter turmoil at his absence. A year of condemning herself for her lack of action and indecision regarding her feelings for Inuyasha when they were chasing the jewel shards. A year of fearing the night and the dreams of his amber eyes.

Right now Kagome was feeling very overwhelmed. Things were going so fast and she simply didn't have enough time to adjust to them. Eight days ago she had been reunited with Inuyasha. The meeting so quick, she was not prepared at all for it. Then she finds herself meeting a new friend and suddenly being forced to deal with the impending relationship between Sumire and Sesshoumaru. She had been so busy this past week helping Sumire through her predicament that she hadn't really gotten used to her own.

She couldn't even call it eight days of being with Inuyasha as she had slept through two of them after unsealing Sumire. In the days she had been with Inuyasha, they were almost always occupied with other things. Kagome had spent more time with Sumire than Inuyasha. Now that they were at the Citadel and the ceremony complete, Sesshoumaru seemed to be taking all of Inuyasha's time. In all, she just couldn't seem to find the time to spend with her hanyou like she wanted to.

Asami-sama had requested of them to nurture the 'ghost of love' between Sesshoumaru and Sumire but she was beginning to wonder if the phrase didn't apply to Inuyasha and herself as well. They might well be together but it sure didn't feel like it to her. Even the words of promise they had just whispered were beginning to feel more rushed and forced than she would have liked. Inuyasha looking for reassurance and her providing it. Somehow she thought those words would have come at a more important moment, not thrown out in passing in a hallway.

'No! Don't think that way!' she thought to herself as she headed to the kitchen to grab some food for Sumire and herself. This wasn't some romance novel she was living. There was no such thing as the perfect setting or timing when it came to love. There was just something off though. First she had felt relieved and almost giddy but the more she thought about it the more it just hadn't seemed right.

Her emotions were beginning to get the best of her. How long had she been waiting for this moment and how many days had passed since her return that she had prayed to be with Inuyasha? So why was it now that she felt like something was missing? Inuyasha was just so different than before. He laughed openly at her now, kissed her so passionately and he looked so much more like a man. It was like they were two different people thrust into a scenario where they were expected to act a certain way. The problem for Kagome was that she had been so focused on being with him that she hadn't really taken into account what it would be like.

Foolishly she assumed it would be like the old days, them running around the countryside in total freedom. Reality had finally begun to sink in and she was getting scared. Terrified that her own feelings towards Inuyasha had changed somehow. What continued to frighten her was this gnawing feeling inside that something just wasn't right. She couldn't pin it down to anything specific. It could be self confidence, perhaps fear of the unknown; not being a psychologist she wasn't about to self diagnose herself at the moment.

'Ghost of love,' she thought again. Yes, that's exactly what is was. Something lingered between them from the past. A memory so hauntingly beautiful that both of them were maybe lost in it's illusion. It wasn't as if they didn't care for each other and it wasn't like they didn't love each other.  Kagome just felt like what they had now was just a mere shadow or semblance of what they were before. She felt like she was being rushed to find that place once again. What they both needed was time to adjust to each other and time to find that comfortable feeling once again.

Currently she was too on edge when she was close to him. Too aware of every little movement and gesture. Also so very self conscious that it made it difficult to focus on anything else. Those dreams that had turned hot and racy played through her mind too often. What they had before was an innocent love, two teenagers brought together in the most unusual of circumstances.

However, his kisses told her that the shy and naïve young hanyou was long gone. Replaced by a man who was all too aware that she was a woman. Their love before had been primarily based on their strong friendship, now she wasn't sure that would be the case.

“Hmmm, unimpressive indeed!”

Kagome was drawn from her thoughts at the sound of a voice. She was a little surprised when a youkai was suddenly standing in front of her, right before the kitchen doors. Being constantly surrounded by youkai in the Citadel she had been forced to ignore her natural ability to feel youki but this woman had seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

The youkai was curvy and dressed rather provocative for being simple kitchen staff. Kagome deduced that this could possibly be their spy Risa. “I beg your pardon?”

“I thought a miko would be a little more impressive but I find you nothing more than a common human. You're not even anything to look at. Practically flat chested when one compares you to me!” The youkai smiled haughtily at her, waging her own personal inspection with her eyes.

Kagome just smiled sweetly back, refusing to be baited by the woman she know knew for sure was the spy. “Sorry to fall short of your expectations. Now if you would kindly excuse me I have some business in the kitchen.”

“I've been wondering to myself why an impressive man like Inuyasha would bother chasing you around? A miko shouldn't have any more interest in a hanyou beyond that of kindness. He is something worthy of pity. Perhaps that is why you keep him near.” Risa moved sideways, effectively blocking the entrance to the door.

Kagome was quickly losing her temper but she knew that was exactly what the spy was trying to do. Create tension between her and Inuyasha. Kagome was smarter than her though. As much as she wanted to back hand the bitch she would play the role of 'kindhearted miko' right now. “Really, I don't have time to chat. If you would kindly move as I am in a hurry.”

The youkai chuckled, completely unfazed by her requests. “Average face, small chest and so very obviously a virgin.”

Kagome blushed at the last comment. Just who the hell did this woman think she was. One didn't normally go around taking about complete strangers in such a way.

“A man like Inuyasha wouldn't be satisfied with a novice like you. Why don't you do us all a favor and go back to your little village. Leave the youkai men to us woman who are more suited for them. Ha! A miko wouldn't have the first clue about what men are really after and what you need to do to keep them satisfied. Little girls like you might as well just stay all sweet and innocent until they die. Don't worry miko, I'll take good care of that hanyou.” Risa smiled arrogantly at her,

'Oh this bitch!' Kagome thought as she took a few slow steps forward. When she was nose to nose with the spy she smiled sweetly before grabbing hold of the youkai's arms. Then she let loose, allowing her reiki to flare and burning the youkai's arms with her power.

“Listen here you pompous bitch. Let me give you a grave warning. I'm not like your typical miko and I guarantee the day you touch Inuyasha is the last day you live.” Kagome felt a surge of satisfaction at the look of terror that spread across the spy's face. She didn't even cringe when the smell of burnt flesh reached her nose.

When she released the spy, the youkai vanished in a puff of smoke. The proud little miko had to smirk in self satisfaction. 'That will teach that bitch!'

Kagome thought her face was still likely fixed with a permanent grin as she made her way into Sumire's room, her hands full with a tray of food and tea. Her triumphant round with the spy was still running through her mind. After sliding the door closed she made her way farther into the room.

Sumire was not in bed, rather sitting in front of an open window. Her distant gaze was all Kagome needed to see to know that her friend was still battling her own personal demons. Setting the tray down on a table, she poured Sumire a cup of tea and then filled another for herself. Quietly she approached her friend, kneeling down beside her and looking up at the stars. She set Sumire's cup down on the window sill and again returned her gaze to the night sky.

If Sumire was contemplating her gift and everything that she was now, Kagome certainly wasn't going to interrupt her. She would be here with her, offering what support she could but for now it seemed just being here would be enough. Sumire would talk if she wanted to. This was a chance for Kagome to contemplate the changes in her own life.

Sipping on her tea her mind conjured up images of her sweet hanyou. He had been tempting in the soft light of his room earlier. What was even more overwhelming was the feelings his honesty and sincerity had left her with. At what point had they gone from giddy teens to adults? She had caught glimpses of herself in a mirror in this grand estate — not much had changed from her memories of herself. She was slightly taller, her chest larger and her hair longer but besides that she still resembled a high school girl. With a little luck maybe even a sophomore college student.

Spending a year with Inuyasha chasing the jewel shards and then a year after being in limbo, she safely assumed that she was seventeen now.  Twenty years in limbo had maybe only aged her a year. Had she been at home she would have easily fit in with the first year university students. The way her figure was now it might have been nice to dress up and go clubbing like her friends were possibly doing now. She sighed, suddenly wondering that if the well had worked, would she return to a world twenty years in the future. If so, her mother would be white haired and wrinkled, jii-chan had probably passed away and Souta could be married with kids. It was simply too much to comprehend.

“Kagome?” Sumire suddenly called out to her and Kagome was surprised to see concern in those violet eyes. “Did something happen?”

Kagome smiled and chuckled lightly. “Funny you should ask.”

The miko spent the next few minutes telling her friend what she had learned from Inuyasha, pushing the point that neither he nor Sesshoumaru had meant her any harm. With that point across she told Sumire about the spy Risa, about Inuyasha's encounter and her recent one. Opting for the sake of personal privacy she left out the details about the kisses and confessions.

Sumire had a perplexed look on her face as she took it all in. Considering everything the girl had been through in the past week, she was taking this new information rather well. That or she was so emotionally numb nothing really affected her anymore.

“A spy huh. Do you know what kind of youkai she was?” Sumire asked.

“Nah, I was too occupied venting my frustration on her!” Kagome winked mischievously at her friend, thrilled when it brought soft laughter from the girl.

“That would have been most amusing to watch.” The smile faded just as quickly as it had surfaced and the young woman went back to staring out at the stars.

Kagome watched her for a minute. Besides what had occurred in the last few days, she really knew nothing of the quiet girl beside her. When they had first met she had thought Sumire to be a young boy. Though not a boy, Sumire certainly had been tomboyish enough. Kagome knew she loved to be outside, climbing trees and simply enjoying nature. The way she had bickered with and teased Inuyasha had revealed a youthful, playful side to her.

Since Sesshoumaru came into the picture Sumire had been quiet and reserved, borderline living in fear Kagome thought. Even though she had only known the original youkai for a day, she thought she preferred that playful Sumire more.

“Sumire-chan, if you don't mind me asking,” Kagome began. She was curious now after Sumire had inquired about the spy. “What kind of youkai was your father?”

“Kitsune.” Sumire's face lit up in a bright smile at the mention of her father. “He was very strong. You know Kagome, its true what humans say,  'the more human a youkai looks, the stronger they are'. Father was just like Inuyasha's father, he didn't have any animal traits unless he transformed into his kitsune self. My first attendants said he was very handsome. Striking red hair and a strong jaw line. Of course, the generations after also told me that but they had never actually known him.”

“Kitsune! Just like Shippo.” Kagome was happily reminded of the youthful kit that had traveled with her years before.

“Shippo, I have heard many stories about him. Inuyasha likes to rub it in that even Shippo is better at using his powers than me!”

“I think I am slowly beginning to understand some of his jabs. He said you were only good with vine attacks. Shippo used to favor nature too. He would transform sticks and stones into all sorts of things. Leave trails of mushrooms when he had gotten into trouble.”  Kagome took another sip of tea. It was wonderful that she had so many memories to draw from. She missed that little boy so much.

“Aye, I love flowers so I have learned a few tricks of my own utilizing them. Inuyasha is right though, I am not suited for fighting. The only thing I am good at is running away and hiding.”

Kagome noted how those eyes swirled with raw emotion at those words. Large violet orbs that were full of turmoil looked sadly back at her. Those words had so much more meaning to them. Everyone was a little guilty of running away and hiding at some point. What was Sumire constantly running from? The obvious response was Sesshoumaru but there had to be more to it than that. It could be something as simple as her own fears.

“Kitsune huh. Well you must resemble your mother because I can't envision you as a red head!”

Sumire smiled and laughed a little at the miko's statement. She definitely didn't take after her father, the pale hair and violet eyes had come from her mother. The love for nature and her youkai powers were all his though. When she a very young girl her attendants had often chided her for her rowdy behaviour but they had all laughed later, commenting on how much she took after the great kitsune. She took great pride in those words.

Those humans had taken great care of her, ensuring her safety and well being. Every generation, studying under the previous so that they could ensure they followed her father's detailed instructions. Every generation going out of their way to bring her up the same way her parents would have, if they were alive.

“My father, he never expected to leave me alone,” Sumire looked at the young miko who had suddenly become a very important person to her. She wanted to tell someone some of her own worries and sorrows. Kagome seemed like the one person who she had been waiting for to open up to. “He knew that my mother was going to give up her life to give me one. He was strong and proud though bravely facing that birth. They said he didn't cry when they handed me over to him, saying that he felt both joy and sorrow so the two had canceled each other out. He had been a very attentive father, often helping the nurses with their care of me.”

“He sounds wonderful.” Kagome felt honoured that Sumire was opening up about her past. Somehow she felt this conversation wasn't common knowledge.

“Aye, that he was. I have a few very vague memories of him. I was no more than a toddler when he died. Much like a two year old in human standards. I still remember his hands though, how large they were and how strong. They were a man's hands, battle scared and calloused but so very gentle. He smelled of the forest too. I am proud to say I am his daughter.”

“You're very lucky to have your memories of him. I think that memories are something very important that you will always be able to take with you.” Kagome could relate to her as the memories of her family were something she would always cherish.

“Inuyasha's father and mine had been close, often allies in the great wars that had waged in the lands hundreds of years ago. It was in one of those battles that my father perished. A major war with youkai from the mainland. From what I can piece together it was about a year or two before Inuyasha was born. Father had expected to come home from that fight but sometimes the worst case scenario is what happens.”

“I'm sorry,” Kagome reached out to squeeze her friends hand. Despite him passing two hundred years ago, it was never easy to talk about the death of a parent.

Sumire nodded in appreciation, continuing with her tale. “Thankfully he had been a wise man. He had to be I guess. When he and mother were still alive they had moved out to that island, taking refuge in its isolation. They thought it to be the safest place to raise me. Growing up I hadn't realized all the preparations they had made for me but I finally understand. Everything makes sense now that I know they wanted me hidden from the world. The amulet necklace was just the start. They enlisted a family of trustworthy humans.”

She paused to take another sip of her tea. Getting this all out was making her feel much better. Sumire was grateful to her new friend that had agreed to spend the night with her. “I suppose having no other youkai on the island made it easy to keep me a secret. The family he hired was loyal to him and him alone. Every generation born to that line prided themselves in their duty. Father had laid out a detailed plan in the event of his death. The scroll he wrote has been passed down to every head of the human family. They all treated me like their own.”

Sumire had to pause as her emotions threatened to grab hold of her once more. She wiped away a single tear that fell to her cheek. “Death isn't something new to me Kagome. Humans are very fragile creatures. Over the years I have had to watch those whom I cherished grow old and die. Others I have lost to accidents or illness. Does it pain me greatly to think about them all dying? Certainly. The truth is though, I will be able to accept this much better than most. For I have lost so many of them already.”

The miko looked stunned by those words. Sumire wasn't surprised as she must seem contradictory after the way she had behaved not long ago. All the anger and sadness she had expressed before had been the truth. She had been and still was furious at Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha for not telling her but what Inuyasha had explained to Kagome made perfect sense. “I have already grieved for them Kagome-chan. In one big display, I forced out my anger and pain. Though it hurts, I have been through this many times. This time slightly different because I have been forewarned of their end. Untimely as it may be for many of them, they would have at some point left me alone. Just like all their ancestors before them did. Blossoming for a brief moment in my life only to wither and fade.”

Sumire remained focused on those bright orbs in the sky. While Kagome had been out she had ample time to think things over. It was incredibly hard knowing that her human family was going to all perish but once she had a calmer head she was able to put things into perspective. What she had said to Kagome was true. Humans were fragile. They always left her alone, even if they said they would be there for her, eventually the cycle of their lives came to an end. As a young youkai she had learned that painful lesson, more than once actually, finally learning to close off her heart to them. At least that way she didn't hurt so much when they abandoned her. She still cared for those people dearly, but she didn't let them all the way into her heart. For that matter she wasn't willing to let anyone in. Too many times had she been pained by love to have not learned her lesson.

The vision had made her very distraught though. No one should have to watch people they know die in a bloody massacre. She may not have loved them the same way as the first few families but that didn't change the fact that they were important to her. She felt a great loss in the departure of the last people that understood who she was and who her family had been.

What was troubling her most now was the overwhelming feeling of duty and obligation. Those people deserved better. They were isolated on that island. Meaning no one would be there to lay them to rest and they deserved that much. Perhaps she needed the closure just as badly. Her tears may have dried up but the pain had not subsided.

How long she sat there wondering about what she should do she didn't know. Beside her the miko had fallen asleep, her head propped up on the window sill and her hand still wrapped around the tea cup. Sumire couldn't stand being here any longer, trapped in a place she could never call home.
Standing she made her way to the storage chest in the corner of the room. Opening it she smiled brightly when she found her old clothing. Quickly she shrugged out of the silk robes she had been given to wear. Reaching for the soft leather pants she tugged them on. They were snug now and a little short but still fully functional. Next came the sleeveless cream coloured tunic. The familiar soft fabric glided over her skin. The semi-fitted top was now form fitting, once hanging to her knees it was now mid-thigh. She wrapped the blue band around her waist twice, knotting it tightly at her side. Next she pulled on her boots. They at least still fit and it felt great to have them back on.

She took her time with her arm wraps, pulling the strips of cloth snug as she pulled on the leather forearm bands. A well practiced move, she used her teeth and free hand to tighten the strings on the armband. A looped piece of leather fit over her wrist, moved up to her forearm and was again tightened with her teeth to hold the top of the fabric arm wrap tight against her bicep. She did the same with the other arm.

Reaching back into the retrieved the small pack she had carried with her from her island home. Deciding this journey to be more hazardous she pulled out what weapons she had stored within the bag. Two knives were quickly secured in her boots. Looking at the mirror in her room she was stunned at what she saw. Gone was the awkward young woman, replaced with the image of a full grown youkai. It was going to take awhile to get used to her slightly taller frame and definitely the curves she had suddenly found herself with.

Shaking off the urge to sit and stare at herself she returned to that humble pack of hers. The metal smith on the island had made her a set of tiny throwing knives, the thin blades easily concealed under her armbands. So she tucked a set into each arm band, readying herself for any danger. Her hand went up to her chest, something she always did when she was nervous. She frowned when she couldn't find what she was looking for; the amulet her mother had given to her. Remembering the ceremony that had bound her to the Taiyoukai, she quickly realized that it had shattered when the seal had broke.

“Dammit!” She cursed realizing the last thing she had connecting her to her family was now lost forever. This place was feeling more like a cursed tomb by the minute. Sumire was certain she would feel substantially better once she was out of this place and back in the beloved outdoors.

“Sumire-chan?” A tired voice called behind her. “Just what do you think you are doing?”

Kagome had been awakened by noise in the room. When she had opened her eyes she had been a little surprised to find Sumire up and dressed in her old clothing. What the hell was that girl doing?

“Kagome!” Sumire had been planning to slip out when the miko was still asleep. Things looked different now. “I'm leaving Kagome. I can't stay in this place any longer. I have to go to them.”

“Sumire-chan, you won't reach them in time.” Kagome stood, quickly closing the distance between them. Hopefully her friend hadn't suddenly gone delusional.

“I know that Kagome, but I have to go. I don't know if they were all killed and I need to lay them to rest if they were. I have an obligation to them too. I can't stay here and do nothing. It will be fine. I won't reach the island for days. The army that was there will be long gone by the time I reach them.” Sumire wasn't going to be swayed  by anything. She was going and that was that.

Kagome noted the way Sumire had straightened, her chin lifting in rebellious determination. The miko remembered how Sumire had almost gotten away on the first day Sesshoumaru had met her. She knew that Sumire would simply disappear whether or not Kagome wanted her to. This wasn't good.

“Fine, I'll go with you. Let me get Inuyasha first and ...” Kagome was cut off by Sumire.

“No. There is no way Inuyasha will let me leave here. If you go for Inuyasha the whole fortress will know and if Sesshoumaru finds out I will be trapped here forever.”

Kagome knew Sumire was right. She would be in too much danger if she left the citadel. Time to make a difficult decision, go with Sumire and help or go to Inuyasha and have her friend disappear into the night without a trace. Kagome understood just how undetectable kitsune youkai could be. They excelled at hiding, so if Sumire left who knew how long it would take for them to find her. By the time they did she could already be in harm's way.

'Ah hell!' she thought to herself. As much as she didn't like it she knew what she had to do. Sumire needed someone to keep her safe and that was a miko's duty. Plus there was a whole island of humans who needed a miko as well.

“Dammit! You wait right here Sumire. I am coming with you. I just have to run to my room and get my bow. I promise you that I will not stop for Inuyasha. You will wait for me right?” Kagome was reluctant to leave but she needed to be prepared for this journey as well.

She waited while Sumire studied her intensely. “Fine. Be careful not to alert the guard. Remember Kagome, I can sense Inuyasha so I will know if he is coming with you.”
Kagome nodded in response. She needed to think quickly and her mind was racing as she left Sumire's room. She couldn't go to Inuyasha but that didn't mean she couldn't tell him. Smiling as she entered her room she made quick work of her task at hand.

Almost out of breath, she focused as she turned the corner. The guard at Sumire's door didn't even blink as she returned, walking slowly and smiling like she always did. She had concealed what she needed beneath her clothing. Her bow and arrows tucked between the many folds of a few blankets she had hauled with her. To the guard it would look like she was simply hauling some more things from her room to make her stay with Sumire more comfortable.

She was beyond relieved when Sumire was standing in the window, waiting for her.  The youkai had secured the same small bundle strapped to her waist just like she had when they had first met. This time though her long pale hair was braided, falling to her waist. The scarves she had concealed her face were bunched around her neck.

“Ready?” Sumire asked, happy that the miko had not lied. She watched as Kagome dropped the blanket, pulling out the bow and arrows she always kept with her. She was once again dressed in the telltale attire of a miko. Red hakama and a white haori, her hair pulled back in a ponytail. Kagome nodded back at her.

“Well then, we are off.” Sumire pulled a dried flower petal from her pack. Holding it to her lips she closed her eyes and kissed it.

Kagome watched in wonder as the flower petal grew large enough for them to comfortably sit on. She was instantly reminded of the feather Kagura used to pluck from her hair and transform into a floating seat.  Sumire stepped onto it and reached out a hand to Kagome who accepted it. When they were both seated it elevated, whisking them high into the sky. The whole time Sumire was chanting as they raised into the night air.

“Finished!” Sumire smiled to herself once they were high into the sky. “Now nobody can find us.”

“What did you just do?” Kagome questioned, uneasy at those words.

“Nobody in this world is as good at hiding as kitsune. I just destroyed our trail. No scent, no witnesses  and no problems. Not even Sesshoumaru or Inuyasha can track us now!”

Kagome wasn't certain what Sumire had done but she was suddenly very glad that she had spent the extra few moments she had in her room.

“Ahhhh!” Risa screamed, throwing the glass against the wall. Her arms, though healed now, still tingled where that detestable miko had burnt them. She had slipped out of the citadel and headed back to her master in the South.

Things had not gone the way she had wanted at all. She had failed to worm any information out of anyone in that damnable place. The bait she had given to the Taiyoukai had failed to have any effect on him. No army had been mobilized so she had failed in creating a conflict between the West and South. As it was now that old geezer in the South stood to remain on his throne.

To make things worse she was hold up in a dark, smelly tavern in the middle of nowhere all because of that bitch miko! Risa's eyes glowed red as she vowed to take her revenge on the one who had humiliated her. Perhaps she had underestimated the power of the miko but that wouldn't happen again.

Grabbing the bottle of sake, she took a long drink. Slamming the bottle down she broke into hysterical laughter.

“Oh yes! That bitch is going to pay!”

Converting /tmp/phpnbkjX7 to /dev/stdout