InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Goodbye, My Soul ❯ Emptiness and Despair ( Chapter 1 )

Goodbye, My Soul

 

By INU-KAGLOVER

 

A/N: I SO cannot believe that I'm starting a new fic when I haven't even finished or worked on my last one about 8 months ago. Sorry to all of you who have patiently waited by for me to finish or at least update “The Claiming”. I promise I haven't forgotten about it, it's just on the back burner. As for this one, it's been eating at me for awhile and I finally just caved in. I pretty much already have this one outlined and laid out, just need to continue with the writing. Don't know how many chaps it'll have, but I'm thinking somewhere between 5-10. Who knows. Ok, enough me blabbing, especially when no one's probably listening. On with the tale.

 

Disclaimer: Um, yeah, like not in a million years are these characters mine. The genius Rumiko Takahashi created them for me and about, oh, 184,762 other fan nuts to write about.

 

 

 

Chapter One - Emptiness and Despair

 

 

 

The young woman walked through the place she had once called home. Once, that was, but not anymore. This building here was just a house. She had referred to another as her home for the last three years. A home that had rested in an open area free of pollution, free of constant noises, free of the feeling of being crowded in. Her home had consisted of a small village with straw huts made by hand, peasants who lived off the food they grew, and a small group of travelers who had banded together to fight for the freedom of those they held dear. This little village had sat at the edge of a deep forest inhabited by all sorts of creatures, those that were known at her former home and those that could only be found here, in the area where she had lived.

 

Here she had found herself. Here she had found a strength inside that she had never known. She had found friends whom she could rely on to stand by her, protect her, and make her stronger. She had found acceptance for who she was, her abilities, her weaknesses, and her purity and innocence. Her love for life was contagious. Her smile could quiet an angry mob, her touch could still the deepest hurt, and her aura could calm the most troubled soul.

 

There she had also found the other half to her heart, her spirit, her soul. She had not even known that something was missing, that she was incomplete until she had discovered him.

 

He was everything that she had ever dreamed about. He was also nothing like she had ever dreamed about. He was such a confusion to her, a mystery that she could never quite figure out. Just when she thought she had him pinned, he would do or say something that would completely blow her theories away. He was an enigma in and of himself. But he was hers. After all the fights, all the hurt, all the pain, he had finally made the choice. He had picked her in the end. But their joy would be short-lived.

 

Not even two weeks after he had claimed her, he was lost to her.

 

The small, petite form drifted like a wraith from one room to the next, touching doorway after doorway until she came to the one she was looking for. The room she once referred to as her bedroom, but now felt empty. It, too, had lost the shine it once held. The dreams of happiness and love that abided here had fled in the wake of her tears and sheer anguish.

 

She sat down at her desk, her face not focusing on anything before her. She had become like a robot, her body acting on autopilot. She had not eaten a bite of food for the past three days and had not slept in the last five. Her body was gaunt and thin from weight-loss and her skin had taken on a listless tone. The once shining, sleek hair now hung in limp strands down her back.

 

But her eyes. Her eyes, they were the worst. The brilliant, deep-blue hue that had once been the entrance to her soul, now was a dull gray. As the life in her spirit had slipped out, so had the color. Those eyes that had previously shined with the glow of love, of the knowledge that there was good in everything and everyone, were now bleak, endless orbs. The life in them had fled along with her will to live. Anyone who gazed upon her now felt only a shiver of despair and quickly turned from the haunted look that was etched upon her soul.

 

For three months, she had existed alone. For three months, she had grieved, screaming until her throat was raw, praying until the skin of her knees were a raw, bloody mess, begging for an answer to her pleas. Nothing was ever received. Not a sound was heard from the gods above and she gradually gave in to the emptiness.

 

Her mother had held her sobbing daughter for hours the day she had returned. Her daughter would not move from the edge of the well and was only carried inside after her body had succumbed to the strain of the day before. Her mother was at a loss as how to help the young woman. Nothing she said or did brought any comfort to the girl. She could only hold her and try to feed her when she was too exhausted to refuse. All of her words fell on deaf ears. If her daughter heard her, she gave no indication.

 

The same occurred when her younger brother and grandfather tried to reach out to her. They tried anything and everything to get a response from her, but to no avail. The only thing she reacted to was the family pet. The fat, orange cat seemed to sense its mistress' distress and would rub its body along her legs and hands. At first, the feline received nothing back from its ministrations, but gradually the girl began to sift her fingers through the cat's fur. Her strokes were light, as if she was unaware of what she was doing, but eventually they formed a pattern, going up one side of the cat's head, over the ears, and back to the other side. Almost as if she was stroking something that she could see only in her mind. This was the only reaction she had to anything for two weeks.

 

Then suddenly one day, it seemed as if she became aware of her surroundings again. Her mother awoke one morning to find her sitting at the breakfast table eating a bowl of ramen. She sat down next to her and reached out her hand to gently place it on the girl's arm. The girl looked up as if mystified to feel someone touching her and raised her gaze to the woman's eyes. Her mother gasped in horror to see the bleak and absolute anguish that filled her child's face. The look of total desolation in the girl's eyes completely devastated her parent.

 

“Oh, Kagome,” were the only words uttered into the room as one female reached out to embrace the other one. Nothing else was spoken for nothing else could be said.

 

Two months later, Kagome returned to school. But it was not the Kagome everyone remembered. For one, this Kagome looked nothing like the previous one. Gone was the personality, the vivaciousness, the zest for life. She had lost so much weight her clothes hung limply off her shoulders. Her eyes, though they now were able to focus on the people and subject at hand, no longer emitted emotion. Her friends instantly recognized the change and tried to broach the subject of why, but upon receiving vague and unclear answers, they finally gave up. However, they stuck by the young woman and acted as a shield against those who would hound the girl for answers. For that, Kagome was grateful.

 

The unfocused look on her face gradually narrowed until only her eyes remained glassy. Her hands began lightly running along the desk's edge as if feeling something that wasn't there, her head bowed down. Her thoughts were a hundred miles away, or more accurately, five hundred years in the past. Back to the day, when she had been brutally taken from all she held dear and the man she held above everything and everyone else, her mate.

 

 

 

This story is dedicated to all my reviewers who have stuck with me through thick and (especially) thin times. You all make me want to continue writing even when my muse takes a holiday. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

 

Araishin,, Jennae, Washuu Hanyou, Jolaine, Sakouya, Kirara Higurashi, Moonhanyou, Inu_and_Nazuna_4_eva, Shiichan921, Ms.Shay, DarklessVasion, w_j, chaos_kyes_fallen_angel, Cutie Pie Hentai, MyogaM34, Mystic Hanyou, RavenShadow, Draechaeli, FayeMegan, Dragoninuyokai, Torrieoreo

 

You all are the BEST!